The heavy feeling in her stomach was back. She knew what Nihlus said, what he just confessed, but somewhere in the process of realization and belief the information refused to settle.

"Well?" Nihlus said when she still hadn't responded.

She looked up at him, shifting in her position against the door, very aware that he was close enough that she could feel the warmth of his body. "What?" she asked.

He sighed, the warm of his breath brushing against her face. "Normally in this situation it is a bad sign when the silence continues on for nearly…" he pulled back to look at the clock beside his bed "five minutes," he looked back to her. "I'm trying to be patient here and let all this sink in, but I kind of just poured my heart out to you and all you can do is stare at me."

"Sorry…" she muttered, her hands fumbling behind her for the green panel to the door.

He noticed and pulled her away from the door by her upper arms that he was still gripping. "Don't run from me, Shepard," he pleaded, spinning them so she was in the center of the room with him in between her and the door.

"I just…" she tried, running her hands over her face. "I'm bad at this sort of thing, Nih. I'll fuck it up, or not do something right, or just… be me…" she said, wrapping her arms around her middle.

"Just be you?" he said and then chuckled. She snapped her head up to him at the sound. "Shepard…" He moved close to her again, cupping her cheeks in his hands. "Just you is who I want," he purred and before she could protest he went to kiss her again. And then she was gone, slipped out of his grasp like water.

"I'm bad at this… at all of this…" she repeated, retreating further into the room, knowing she wouldn't make it by Nihlus and get the door open before he could grab her.

"That's ok, because I am good at this," he teased, taking a step towards her. He took in her body language. She was tense, uncomfortable, and was trembling slightly. "You look like I'm going to pounce on you,"

"You look ready to pounce," she countered.

He chuckled and went to the bed, sitting on the edge. "I would like to, but I have more control than that. Like I said, I'm used to taking other's customs into consideration."

"You normally just go to a bar and pick up an asari," she pointed out.

He shrugged, "When I'm simply looking for release so I don't cave to the temptation," he said, waving at her.

"Temptation?" she asked, confused again.

He sighed, "You really have no idea what you do to me," he said and motioned for her to come to him. She hesitated and he rolled his eyes. "I'm not going to do anything unless you ask for it," he assured her. "Pants stay on and buttoned, right?"

She nodded and went to him, stopping in front of him. He put a hand on the small of her back and pulled her close, forcing her to move so she was straddling him. "Nihlus," she protested, refusing to relax and sit on him.

"Shepard please stop insulting me and have a bit of faith that I'm not going to harm you," he growled, his hands on her waist so she couldn't get away, the last thing he needed was for her to run away. When she ran she would hide for a while and then pretend like the situation never happened.

"S-sorry…" she muttered and relaxed, settling herself down on his lap.

"It's a miracle, you aren't being violated," he said sarcastically.

"I said I was sorry," she grumbled and tried to figure out what she was supposed to do with her hands.

He chuckled and moved her arms so they were wrapped around his neck. "You have a nice waist," he commented, his hands running over them fondly.

"Thanks?" she said awkwardly.

He moved his mouth to her neck, nipping along the exposed flesh. "It's not a sexual thing to humans I take it?" he asked, being mindful of how she would tense a bit with each nip.

"No…" she confirmed. "For humans it is more…" she tensed a little at a hard nip below her jawline. "It's butts and boobs," she finished as he gave the tender spot a lick. It was Nihlus, she didn't know why she was so tense. She trusted Nihlus with her life. He said he wouldn't judge her for her lack of experience. But what if she messed up and she lost his friendship to an awkward interspecies sex attempt? Or if whatever he saw in her wasn't enough down the road? Could they go back to just friends? Could she go back to being just friends after having her soldier boy's affections?

Nihlus being a different species didn't bother her as much as it should, she never made a good human anyways. She swallowed, having made up her mind. She pushed him away from her neck so she could look him in the eye. "Pants stay on?" she asked to confirm.

"And buttoned," he assured.

She nodded back before she leaned in, pressing her lips against his mouth plates. He thrilled as she finally relaxed against him. He moved a hand from her waist and cupped her ass, using what she had told him to his advantage. She let out a noise of protest, her body tensing back up, but it was muffled as Nihlus slid his tongue into her mouth. Just like back on Omega her body felt hot and a knot was forming in her abdomen. She tried to focus on the contact, to stop thinking about every little thing she did, could do, how it would look, if she would do it right, but all her worries just kept bubbling up until she couldn't stand it and pulled back.

Nihlus looked down at her, trying to read what was wrong. He knew her well, could read the way she refused to look him in the eye, the way her cheeks turned red. He knew no comforting words could banish the worries, but that wasn't the only way to motivate a soldier. "What's wrong? Not up to the task? And here I thought you always gave one hundred percent," he said with a shrug, leaning back on his arms a bit.

"I do," she said, her eyes snapping to his. "I always do, no matter what it is I always do my best." She stood up on her knees so she was higher than him, completely forgetting the position they were in.

His mandibles flared in a smile. "That's my Shepard," he purred and before she could blink he slipped her shirt, making sure to hook her sports bra on his way up, off over her head and through it somewhere in the room.

"Nih—" she cried in surprise, going to cover herself, but Nihlus didn't give her the chance. He flipped them so they were laying on the bed with her under him. "Nihlus, I'm not going to—"

"Calm down," he purred, pulling her legs over his hip bones. "Pants are still on, they will stay on, I promise."

"And buttoned?" she asked with a slight laugh that cut off to quickly as he leaned down and swirled his tongue around her right nipple.

"Did I find something you like?" he asked before rolling the raised bud gently in his teeth.

"S-shut up," she stuttered. She placed her hands above her head, not having anything else to do with them, before she remembered that her underarms were hairy from not having a razor. She doubted Nihlus would care or even know that it wasn't the social norm for human females, but she still lowered her arms back down. Instead she moved them his shoulders, one slipping up under his cowl as he continued to switch between her breasts. His hips gave a jerk against her and she quickly pulled her hands away. "Sorry," she said quickly and tried to sit up.

Nihlus pulled her back down and against him. "Why are you sorry? Under the fringe is sort of the same thing to me as your breasts are to you," he explained.

"I doubt that it's the same," Shepard said, her arms going over her breasts in what little modesty she could muster in her current position.

"It's a point of arousal when touched, just like your breasts," he said, confused.

"Yeah but the sight of breasts arouses men, hence why we always keep them covered because having them exposed is considered indecency," she explained.

"Ah, it's like a turian's waist then," he said and pulled her arms away again, putting her hands on his waist. "It's sexual to show off your waist and hips and they are sensitive because the plates are the thinnest there," he purred and guided her hands to the right spots. He let out a sub-harmonic groan and bucked against her again. Spirits, this woman was going to be the death of him. He couldn't remember the last time he craved a woman this badly.

"Ah… Nihlus?" she asked, shifting herself against him.

"Hm?" he purred, his hands pulling her firmly against him.

"You're not… am I doing something wrong?" she asked as he ground their pelvises together, but something had yet to make an appearance.

He laugh. "No, you are fine, sometimes it just takes a bit of coaxing. Probably just scared to show itself in fear of you running away at the sight," He teased.

She rolled her eyes. "No promises," She said with a slight smile, but it faded quickly. "Then how do I… Kind of lost here…" she said, avoiding his eye contact again.

"Well the three main spots for turians is behind the fringe, the waist, and the mandibles. And you are doing fine so stop with all the shyness, the Shepard I know isn't shy," He said, leaning down to press their foreheads together. "Nothing you do is going to break me, and I promise if you do something wrong I will tell you and not make fun of you."

She gave him a sideways glance. "You promise?"

"Have I ever lied to you?" he said, his hands stroking her hips.

She chewed on her bottom lip, contemplating things he could only guess. "Alright," She said before tilting her head up. He thought she was going to kiss him, instead her tongue darted out and ran along the edge of his left mandible.

His claws on her hips dug into her skin as he pulled her against him again. A hand slipped under her and settled between her shoulder blades, pulling her up against him. She let out a small noise and arched herself against him. He bucked against her again as she continued to lick and nip at his mandibles, the desire only building more when she wrapped her legs around his waist, denying him an escape he never wanted anyways. She pulled back a bit, feeling something hard in the front of his pants. 'Don't run,' he silently pleaded. 'Don't shut me out again. Don't tempt me with a taste and take it away.'

Well Nihlus certainly has reason to be proud. She may have not had a partner in eight years, but she had dabbled in things to aid herself enough to know what big was. She looked up at him, tearing her eyes away from where their hips were pressed against each other. He looked terrified, and that is saying something considering how calm he stayed on the battle field. He was scared that she'd run. And she didn't blame him, a nagging voice in the back of her head kept telling her the dangerous waters they were in. It kept bringing up the fact that if they continued, if they tried for more than friendship that she could—most likely would—screw it up and could lose him as a friend all together. There was also the fear that Nihlus didn't want the same end that she wanted. He had said it himself, for his kind sex the first time was casual. Was he just exploiting that, or did he mean he wanted a relationship with her? She tried thinking through all the possibilities, to think about this from the most logical stand point that she could, but the longer she thought the worse the terror on Nihlus' face got. She hated it. Instead her mind went to ways she could banish the look from his face. He was afraid that she would run, so she would do the opposite.

She reached down , worming her hand in between them, and pressed the palm of her hand against him. "Spirits, you're going to be the death of me," he said, voice deep and husky, making her shiver. He pulled her against him again, one hand on her back, the other hooked under her knee, hitching her leg up higher.

They kissed again, tongues sliding against each other, invading the other's mouth. Teeth clashed against each other in their need to be closer. He tried to pull back, to give them a chance to catch their breath, but she couldn't stand to let him. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him close again. Nihlus didn't protest as they continued to kiss, gasping each other's breath in a desperate attempt not to have to stop. She liked this, far more than she should. It was odd and strange and it felt so right. His plates were warm and hard against her soft skin. His tongue long and rough as it explored her mouth, claiming it with its foreign taste. His claws dug into her skin as he pressed her tight to him. The whole thing set her body afire in a deliciously unfamiliar way. She was too lost in it to realize his hands where on the button to her pants until he pulled away, moving away from her and sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Did…" she panted "Did I do something wrong?" She put her arms over her chest again, her modesty coming back in her fear that she messed up.

"No," he said, not looking at her as he adjusted himself in his pants. "Actually the opposite, if we continue I really won't want to stop." He rubbed the back of his neck. "Hell I already really don't want to stop, but I'm trying to behave."

She moved so she was kneeling beside him on the bed. "So we are stopping because I didn't screw it up?" she clarified.

He chuckled and brushed her hair behind her ear. "We are stopping because I want to do this right." He cupped her cheek and pulled her in for another short kiss. "Because I don't want to even think about what it would be like without you and I don't want to mess this up and have to find out."

She looked down to the bulge in his pants before she looked away, looking anywhere but him. "If you want I could… Well there is this thing humans do, I don't know if other species do, but…" Her cheeks turned redder as she talked and she started shifting nervously. "Well the girl can use her mouth to—"

"No," Nihlus said, cutting her off.

She flinched, "Sorry, I didn't mean to offend you or anything," she muttered.

"You didn't, and some species do do that, obviously turians aren't on the giving end of that because the teeth, but you didn't offend me," he said, regretting his harsh tone. "But you are nervous enough being around it when it's tucked away, I'm not going to push you into that. We do this at your pace or not at all," he said firmly.

She looked at him shocked, but nodded. "That's not very player like of you," she commented.

He shrugged, "Every man has to get leashed at some point," he said and pressed their foreheads against each other. "But I don't regret it."

SfF

"I can't see out of this mask," Kaidan complained as he nearly ran into a pole.

"That's because it is made for batarians, who have four eyes. I gave you the option to pass as an asari," Nihlus said, grabbing his arm and guiding him through the crowded streets. Shepard passed among the crowd easily, effortlessly guiding Kolyat and an armored Joker a few paces ahead of them.

"I'm not going to cross dress," Kaidan repeated what he had said on the ship.

Nihlus shrugged and pulled him close to avoid crashing into a volus. "Technically since they are mono-gender they portray the part of the male and the female. They do refer to themselves as she because it makes it easier for the rest of us but it would only kind of be cross dressing."

"They have breasts… and I don't want to think about what else they have if they are the guy too," Kaidan said, shaking his head with a shudder.

"No they don't have a penis, they reproduce in a similar way to cloning, only taking a sample of another's DNA structure telepathically to allow the DNA to be randomized," he explained and pulled them along faster to catch up to Shepard. "Do you even know where you are going?"

"I think the real question is why you know so much about the asari reproduction cycle," Shepard said, eyeing him under the helmet.

Nihlus laughed. "I had a mission a few years back that required research into the area," he assured her and lead them to a hotel a little ways off the main strip.

"Why are we staying in a hotel again?" she asked, going with him to the counter.

"Ship needs some work done and I can't have workers coming in with an unknown alien species roaming about," he explained, ordering them a two bedroom hotel suite. "There is a big dent in the hull from our trip to omega. The kinetic shields stopped us from being breached, but I'd rather not travel through space with it like that more than I have to," he explained further as the elcor receptionist went to get their key.

"Then why did we fly to Nos Astra if it was dangerous?" Shepard snapped, punching his arm.

"Do you know how much shit I'd get if I let all of you roam about the Citadel? Having Wrex on my ship was risky enough, I didn't need to give the Council more reason to pile on the work load," Nihlus said, snatching the key from the elcor.

"Happily: Enjoy your stay," The elcor drawled out in their usual monotone.

"Why would Wrex cause you problems?" Shepard asked as they all crowded into the elevator. "Guy was awesome."

Nihlus sighed, leaning against the back of the elevator, careful to keep distance between him and Shepard. They had both agreed that they would keep their private affairs private. Kaidan already knew that Nihlus liked her, it was doubtful he would have a good reaction to their sort of relationship. "Wrex has a… special relationship with C-Sec. Whenever he comes on the Citadel he has to go to C-Sec headquarters where they drill him about behaving and not killing people. That paired with how often we have to clean up messes the assassins that go after him cause doesn't make him a council favorite."

"Sounds like you've had some run ins with him," Shepard pried.

He rubbed his face plates. "Not with him, but I did have the task to clean up a station that he and another merc tore apart trying to kill each other. Neither body was found, and the station's crew was dead. Life supports where rampaged, and half of the station was literally blown up, so yeah… Nothing against Wrex, was impressed by his skill, but the council would have my neck if they knew that I had him at the Citadel."

They were all quiet until Kaidan laughed, "I picked a good ally in that fighting pit then."

"Yes because it isn't hard to find the biggest guy in the room and figure out that he is a good bet to hide behind," Shepard snorted, giving Kaidan a light shove.

Kaidan went to protest, but knew that Shepard could easily beat him up so he kept quiet.

'And you wonder why you aren't my type.' Shepard thought as he backed down.

They went to the hotel room and Shepard threw her bag of clothes on the bed in the separate room. "That's the turian bed," Nihlus commented.

"I know, I can't sleep on those soft ones anymore, too weird," she said as she unlocked and took off her helmet.

"I'm not giving up the only bed that won't kill my back to sleep in," Nihlus said, putting his stuff on the bed beside hers.

"Shep, you can just sleep out here, there are two full beds," Kaidan commented.

"I'm not waking up with a rash," she said, crossing her arms.

"Me either," Joker piped in, tossing his stuff on the bed Kolyat wasn't sitting on.

Kaidan looked at them confused so Kolyat sighed and explained. "Prolonged skin to skin contact with a drell can give you a rash. So unless you want to be scratching tomorrow I sleep in a bed by myself," he said and sprawled out on the bed he had claimed as his own.

"Oh… well you can sleep out here with Joker and I could sleep on the couch," Kaidan tried.

Shepard went to the door to the room. "There is no need, me and Nihlus are both mature adults, we are capable of sleeping in the same bed," she said before she shut the door, locking it just in time for Nihlus to pull her away and invade her mouth with his tongue.

"You could be a little more convincing you know," she said when they pulled apart so they could get her out of the heavy armor. "Kaidan wouldn't have kept protesting if you didn't keep staring at me."

"What can I say, it isn't in my nature to let another man try and keep me from what is mine," he growled, hastily working on taking the lower half of her armor off to join the top half on the floor. "It makes me possessive," he pulled her to him, one hand on her waist, the other cupping her ass. Over the past few days since he had told her how he felt they had made out a few more times and he was growing ever more fond of her ass and the little noise she'd make when he grabbed it. "And since when have you been able to pick up on those sort of things?" he added as he slowly guided her back to the wall.

"S'not hard once I know what to look for," she shrugged and glanced at the approaching wall he was leading her too. She smirked and jumped on him, wrapping her legs around his waist.

He stumbled a bit, his hands quickly going to cup her ass to help her keep her balance. "Give me a little warning," he laughed and pressed her to the wall, allowing his hands to be freed and wander along her hips.

"But then you would be prepared," She smiled and pulled him into a kiss.

He shook his head, but willing gave her a kiss. "As much as I would love to continue this, I have some matters to attend to," he said, pulling back too soon for her liking.

She felt her insides give an uncomfortable squirm. She knew what that meant. Technically they weren't officially dating so she couldn't be mad and she didn't even know if turians slept around while dating anyways. No rules had been set down that they were exclusive. Going over that information in her head only made the feeling in her stomach worse. "Right…" she said and got off of him, going over to her bag on the bed. "'Matters.' I know the drill," she said, refusing to look at him as she shifted through her bag to give herself something to do.

"Not that," he growled, snatching the bag from her. "And quit insulting me, I'm loyal," he said and forced her to look at him. She could feel the chewing out coming and braced herself for the harsh words. But he was silent. Finally he sighed and pressed his forehead to hers. "I am yours, Shepard. You are the only one I want and the only person I will be with, I promise," he said gently.

"Then what are matters?" she asked confused.

"Food, seeing to the ship, picking up a few… personal items," he explained, giving an uncomfortable cough at the last bit.

"Which are?" she pried.

"I'll be back in a few hours, all of you behave," he said instead of an answer before he left the hotel room and headed down the elevator.

He went to attend to his ship first, meeting the crew he hired to fix her at the docking bay.

"I don't know what you have been putting this ship through, but she is pretty damaged," the head of the crew, a batarian, informed him. "We have this huge dent in the side that looks like you rammed a meteor, but there is also substantial damage to the drive cores, like you went to FTL speed near an explosion."

"I discharged after that… I mean why would that be a problem?" Nihlus said, releasing he gave up too much of his current mission and tried to play off as dumb. It wasn't a complete lie, he had discharged, even if the explosion during the mission to save Joker and Kolyat he had discharged way before it would have been a danger.

"The exhausts are covered in soot and shrapnel, it is stopping you from being able to discharge correctly. The shrapnel tangles up the charge and sends it back to the drive core. Of course it isn't that much, but it adds up. Given the damage to the drive core you are lucky you weren't killed. I'd give it another few days of FTL travel and you would be a smoking pile of ash."

"Oh…" Nihlus said, craning his neck to see inside the exhaust pipe he was talking about. "Oops."

"You nearly got yourself killed through negligence and all you have to say is oops?" the batarian asked, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"How much is it going to cost to get it fixed?" Nihlus asked, ignoring the question.

"We'd have to completely change the drive core and the exhaust pipe, plus the hull and all the wiring under the dent as I'm sure that a dent that size disconnected something," the batarian said, scrolling through his datapad. "It would be cheaper for you to buy a new ship and throw in half a dozen asari consorts while you're at it."

Nihlus thought about it. "So half a million credits?" he asked. "Wait… consorts, not prostitutes… Are the consorts for the entire night?"

The batarian nearly hit him. "Look, as much as I would love to have you pay all my living expenses for the next year and a half you really should just go buy a new ship. This ship is older than you are and with all its problems you would be safer and better off with a new ship. It would also be faster and have more room."

Nihlus sighed, "Yeah but… this ship has sentimental value," he said and put a hand to his ship's hull. He thought to Shepard and the rest of his newly acquired ship mates and sighed again. "Alright… empty her out and ship her to this location," he said as he pulled up his omni-tool and sent the batarian an address. "I'll cover any shipping costs, but it's time to send the good girl back home." He paused. "Also tell the woman there that the Verecaw is retiring and I am fine. The last thing I need is for my mother to expect that I'm returning dad's ship because I'm dead."

He left the crew there to do as he asked and headed to a shipyard.

Ships were expensive and tiresome to shop for. It took him several hours to just find one he liked and then there was the long process of getting the Council to let such a large purchase go through. Finally he convinced them that his ship was no longer space safe, but they only agreed to pay for two thirds of it, leaving him to cover the rest with his own savings. "Remind me why I am a Spectre?" he growled to the turian Councilor, the only one left on the call.

"I was always under the impression it was for the endless number of men and women ready to sleep with you," he commented before he ended the call.

Nihlus nodded in agreement. That defiantly was a perk. This slow relationship with Shepard was going to be the first time he would have to go without since he was in his late teens and that was only because the women in military training overlooked the outsider. Which changed after his first mission, now the night he got back was a night to remember.

"Mr. Kryik?" the volus salesman asked, bringing him out of his thoughts.

"Yes? So this ship will do, here is my part of the payment," he said handing the volus his credit chit. "The rest of it will be sent to you from the Council. And the list of upgrades I gave you will be done when?"

"Give it a week at most, we'll try and get it done sooner if we can, but some of the parts will have to be ordered," he said as he ran the credit chit on a scanner on his belt.

"Good, now if you excuse me I have other matters I need to attend to." Nihlus said and left the shipyard to head to a dextro restaurant.

He ordered himself take out before he went across the street to a levo restaurant. He ordered three meals that the humans would eat and then something obscure that was supposed to be something inspired from Kahje. With the food in hand he went to his last errand and his most dreaded one. He left the food in a private cab and headed a little ways up the street to a small turian owned store. He glanced up and down the street before he slipped inside.

The shop keeper, an older turian, nodded to him as he approached the counter. Nihlus and the man exchanged a few hushed whispers before the shop keeper slipped into the back, leaving Nihlus standing tense at the counter.

"Don't normally get turians your age in here for this sort of thing," the man commented.

Nihlus sighed, "I'm in a… unique position," he admitted as he handed the man his credit chit.

The man scanned it before handing it and a brown bag to Nihlus. "Well I hope the situation resolves itself," the man said and they nodded to each other before Nihlus quickly left.

This was the other reason he chose to do this in Nos Astra. People here knew him, but it was far from the level at the Citadel where just walking around made people whisper. He didn't really want anyone to see him buying… that. It was completely reasonable, but it had a stigma attached to it.

He got back into his cab and drove it to the hotel, juggling the bags of food and his little brown bag. "I got us dinner," Nihlus said as he slipped into the hotel room.

"Great I'm starving," Kaidan said, pausing the video game him and Joker were playing.

"Is that Star Fighter Six?" Nihlus asked, moving further into the room to get a better look. He tripped on one of their bags and all the containers of food he had stacked tumbled.

Shepard was on her feet first and caught the bag containing the three boxes for the humans. The one with Kolyat's food and Nihlus' brown bag tumbled to the floor.

"I'm guessing that one was mine," Kolyat said, crawling to the edge of the bed and looked at the steam, pealed beetle and rice that was scattered across the carpeted floor.

"Yeah, sorry." Nihlus said, setting his food down on the bed and leaned down to the mess, scrapping it back into the container the best he food.

Shepard leaned down to help, seeing the brown bag and picked it up. Nihlus grabbed her hand. "I can handle it," he said, taking the bag from her and putting it under his arm where she couldn't get ahold of it.

She gave him a weird look before she hid her emotions behind a smiling mask. "That's ok, Kol. We can share mine, I eat like a bird anyways," she said, grabbing one of the three containers from the bag she caught and handed it to him. "Just leave me a bit," she said as she handed out the other two containers to Joker and Kaidan. Once everyone had their food she slipped away to join Nihlus in the bathroom where he was throwing away the ruined food. "What's in the bag you don't want me to see?" she asked, shutting the door quietly behind her.

Nihlus tensed a bit and turned to her. "A personal item," he said and went for the door.

She blocked him and snatched the bag from under his arm. He held firm and quickly switched to gripping it in his hand. The bag tore and out fell a blue rubber mitten. She picked it up before he could stop her. "This is what you're embarrassed about?" she asked, slipping her hand in it.

"Yes," he said, trying to get it back from her, but she ducked out of his reach.

"Why do you need a rubber glove anyways? Though It's not really a glove or it would have fingers…" she asked.

He sighed. She wasn't going to stop prying or give it back until he explained. But it wasn't something he wanted to talk about. It was Shepard though, hell she was the reason he needed it. "Turians have claws and our palms have plates. Both make it difficult to… go without a partner."

Shepard snapped her head to him. "You mean this is to—"

"Yes," he said, cutting her off. "Yes it is for a male turian to put over his hand so he can… masturbate. I told you that I wouldn't be with anyone else, but I'm sort of an addict and I figured having it would help me resist—"

"Going off and finding a partner," she finished, not needing to hear him say it.

"No," Nihlus said, taking the glove and wrapping it in a towel since the bag was destroyed. "It will help me resist trying to pressure you. You are too kind hearted, I'm pretty sure I could get you to have sex with me if I pressed it enough. I really don't want to do that, I want it to be your decision. I know that you are still waiting for me to say that I'm kidding or this is an act. I don't want to do anything until I can prove to you that I'm serious," He brushed her hair out of her face. "When we finally do have sex I don't want there to be any doubt in your mind that I love you."

She pulled him into a hug and after a second of confusion he returned it. "Because I do, Shepard… I love you, so much."

"Hey if you two are done with your moment I have to pee," Joker called from the other side of the door.

Shepard removed herself from his arms and went to the door. "Don't miss the bowel this time," She said, grabbing the towel that had Nihlus' aid in it.

"What's that?" Kaidan asked as she passed by, pointing to the towel with his fork.

"I'm a woman who just came out of a bathroom and you want to know what I am intentionally hiding from you, a room full of men?" she asked and went to unwrap it.

"No," Kaidan said, putting up his hands. "That's fine, I don't want to know."

"Men," she said with a roll of her eyes and took the towel into her and Nihlus' room.

'I love that woman,' Nihlus thought and followed her. "You are amazing, you know that?" he asked, taking the towel and dropping its contents in his bag.

"I've been told," she smiled and pulled him into another hug. "But so are you, so it's ok."

He laughed and they went to join the rest of the group currently playing Stars Fighter Six and eating their dinner.

After the food was consumed they all raided the mini-fridge's alcohol and started playing a drinking game with Star Fighter. It had a multiplayer ship battle mode so basically if your ship was destroyed you had to take a shot. It was fun, it was relaxing, and not even an hour in Shepard was pretty wasted.

"And now you all see why Shepard decided to go back to the Marines," Joker said as Shepard tipped back another drink. Everyone else was doing good in the game. Joker was doing the best, having only died twice. Kolyat's tactic was stay out of the main fights and pick them off from the edges. Kaidan and Nihlus spent most of the time trying to land a hit on Joker. And Shepard was the only one who had managed to crash her ship into a planet.

"Remind me not to let her fly the ship," Nihlus said, nudging her side with his elbow.

"Fuck amach," (Fuck off) she muttered and slammed her ship into Nihlus', destroying both of them.

Nihlus just looked at her as she reach for the bottle again. "Alright, now it's on," he said, reaching for his own bottle and taking a long drink from it.

"Beir air," (Bring it) she grunted, leaning forward with her elbows on her knees as their ships respawned.

"She is speaking Irish isn't she?" Kaidan said, turning to look at her.

"Yep," Joker said as he did a barrel roll to get Kolyat off his tail and making the kid slam into a meteor. "She is officially drunk."

"I thought she only switched to Irish off of whiskey," Nihlus commented, handing Kolyat his light wine cooler. They had agreed to let the boy drink, but refused to give him the hard stuff.

"She told you about Rio?" Joker asked, mashing his right trigger repeatedly to bombard Kaidan with missiles. "No when she gets drunk she can always switch to Irish, she just get violent off of whiskey."

"Good to know," Nihlus said and pulled his joystick far back, gliding him over Joker.

"Close one, Nih," Joker commented.

"Wait for it," Nihlus said, turning his ship around right as Shepard slammed into Joker, having been chasing Nihlus.

"Fucking diabhal é , go raibh ar do shon , tá tú dineasáir tarraingteach ," (Fucking damn it, that was for you, you attractive dinosaur) she growled and tipped back her drink again.

Nihlus laughed, catching the punch she sent at his face. "Only off whiskey?" Nihlus asked.

"No, just more violent off of whiskey," Joker said, setting his bottle down as he respawned.

A few more rounds and Nihlus called it off, saying Shepard had plenty to drink and he didn't want her getting sick. "You guys can keep going, but Shepard needs to lay down," he said, carrying her into the separate room.

He shut the door behind him and once it was shut Shepard sprang back to life. "Am Gnéas ?" (Sex time?) she asked before pulling his mouth to hers, forcing her tongue past his teeth.

He groaned and managed to get them to the bed, laying her down on it and climbing over her. Her hands roaming over his armor, hitting the clasps to make it come off. The top part of his armor came off first, followed quickly by him removing his under-armor shirt. She looked at his bare torso and moved her lips to his neck, kissing and nipping and biting. Her hands started working on the locks to his greaves. He pulled himself away from her and stood up, hitting the remaining locks to take off his greaves and boots. He kept his under-armor pants on, which apparently wasn't to Shepard's liking. She crawled over to him and pulled his pants down.

"Shepard," Nihlus said warily.

She ignored him and ran her tongue over the slit his penis would emerge from. He groaned, his hand burying itself in her hair.

"Don't tempt me, Shepard," he purred, not complaining when she licked it again. He felt his plates shift as the tip of his blue shaft emerged. Without hesitation Shepard slipped her mouth around it, swirling her tongue around it, coaxing him further and further out. "Wish I knew you get like this when your drunk a long time ago," he breathed, gripping her hair and pushing himself further into her mouth. "Spirits, I know I need to stop this, but you never get like this sober." He looked down at her as she started bobbing her head up and down on him. "Bold, wanting…" His other hand went to her jaw, guiding her as she continued to suck him. He purred, enjoying it for a second longer before he pulled himself away.

Shepard watched him back up, pulling up his pants as he went. "An raibh féidir liom é mícheart ?" (Did I do it wrong?) She pouted, getting off the bed to follow him.

He pulled her to him and slid his tongue into her mouth, tasting himself on her, making him grip her tighter. "Spirits, I want to Shepard…" he said, breaking the kiss to give both of them a chance to breath. "But not when you're drunk, not when you still don't believe me," he said and guided her back to the bed. "You get rest, I'm going to… go take care of things," he said, going over and putting his armored grieves back on to hide his erection. He grabbed his rubber mitten, balled it into his fist as much as he could, and left the room.

"She asleep?" Joker asked, not looking away from the video game.

"Getting there," he replied shortly and went into the bathroom. He stripped naked and sat down on the toilet, the rubber mitten in his hands. "The things I do for that woman," he sighed and slipped the mitten on.

A/N: And it is done. Ugh you don't know how much of a headache this chapter was to write. With Shepard's personality she would run in most situations, which I didn't want her to do. So I had to come up with some way that she wouldn't run without going against her character and just… she is so stubborn. I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter because it truthfully took a lot of effort.

Fun fact: This story was originally written for my Paragade, which is why this Shep (my paragon) smokes, it is a trait meant for my Paragade, but a few chapters in I switch it to my Paragon. That is also why in one of the early chapters Shepard mentions growing up on the streets.

P.S. I had to edit the story so I thought I'd add something I forgot to mention. To the Laira shipper: This story is ShepXNih, this story is going to stay ShepXNih. If you want to read about someone fucking Laira go to another writer, there are plenty.

That aside I would like you all to keep reviewing and telling me what you like and your hopes for the story. You do impact the storyline, just not on things like the pairing. So please tell me your hopes for this story and you may see your ideas weaved in.