Author's note~ I hope you enjoy
"Wouldn't that be a terrible loss." Adrian said drily, shifting to loop an arm around the boys waist and taking his weight, supporting Newt as they made their way towards the cook hut. "I would hate to miss out on what's surely another five star meal." The careless camaraderie between them back, not hint of tension in their banter, Newt chuckled all the way to dinner.
Adrian and Newt could hear the bustling dinner crowd long before they fully came into view, voices overlapped and melded into a rowdy chorus of enthusiasm for the end of another day. At the edge of the trees, just out of sight of the dining gladers, Adrian carefully released his hold on Newt and stepped away.
"If I help you over to the tables, every guy on the other side of those trees is going to pester you as to what's going on." Adrian stated in a matter-of-fact voice. "It's best if you walk in on your own two feet. I'll grab us some grub and meet you at a table."
"Yeah, sure." Newt replied, watching Adrian saunter over to the dinner line as if he hadn't a care in the world. Newt absently rubbed at his upper arm, suddenly a little chilly without Adrian's warm shoulder to lean on. Ignoring the feeling, he limped his way to the closest table and sat gingerly, grateful to take a load off. He scanned the dining area, wondering whereabouts his usual motley crew were. As if the very thought had summoned him, Minho popped up seemingly out of nowhere and approached Newt cautiously.
"How're you feelin'?" Minho asked, warily eyeing his friend and shifting to the balls of his feet. Just in case. "Still yanked off about me narking on you this morning?"
"I should be." Newt replied, giving the keeper a bland stare. "Probably would be, too, if Add-Adrian hadn't patched me up. So, although your complete inability to leave things the shuck alone frustrates the snot out of me, I do in fact feel better now. It'll still be a week or two until I can run again, though."
Minho's face relaxed into his usual cocky lines and he dropped onto the bench beside Newt, satisfied that there was no hard feelings from that morning.
"Yeah, well, I'd say I was sorry but I wouldn't mean it. Seriously, man, you looked like something a griever coughed up. What did you expect me to do? Walk away and leave you to suffer? In ANYTHING but silence, might I add."
"Whatever, Min. It's done, and dealt with. We're all good."
"That's good to hear." Minho said smugly, mischief twinkling in his eyes as his natural sass resurfaced. "Maybe your new bestie buddy can give you something to put you out at night, so the rest of us poor souls don't have to listen to you whining yourself to sleep in your hammock for the next two weeks."
Newt flushed lightly.
"I'm staying at Adrian's place until I'm back to full again, so you lot won't be bothered by my 'whining'. No need to worry about your beauty sleep. And, maybe that way I'll actually get some sleep myself instead of being kept up all bloody night by your earth rattling snoring." Newt retorted sharply, mildly embarrassed by the pinch about his whining. A couple of boys walking past heard the comment, stopping for a second to listen before moving on.
"You're sleeping at his place?" Minho asked, startled. "Why?"
"He offered." Newt shrugged. "And it's definitely more comfy than a bloody hammock."
Minho just narrowed his eyes suspiciously, studying his friend as the wheels in his head turned. Unsure as to the man's motives, concerned for his friend, he settled himself in for a serious discussion.
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Adrian waited patiently in line, absently running through various plans in his head as the guys ahead of him were served. He constructed the walls around his new privy in his mind, considering and rejecting a few ideas before settling on what he hoped would be the simplest and quickest to build, toying with small tweaks and additions that would make it both comfortable and welcoming. Hopefully, once he'd completed this project and could show the others how convenient and practical it was, he could convince them to roll up their sleeves and build a row of outhouses for the rest of the gladers to use.
God, he missed indoor plumbing.
He'd just started to design a larger multi-use version when someone stepped up beside him, invading his personal space and demanding his attention. He recognized the ugly sneering face immediately.
"Wes." He acknowledged mildly, fully aware of the tenor of their last meeting and not bothering to add a greeting.
"Adrian." Wes returned in the same voice, an excited gleam in his beady little eyes. "We overheard something a little funny a minute ago, didn't we boys?"
The two boys who were hanging back a little appeared to be Wes's closest confidants; they nodded jerkily and muttered in agreement, like poorly controlled sock puppets. Adrian briefly pitied their obvious obliviousness. Something tells me these two were absent on the day God was handing out brains, Adrian thought wryly.
"Well, we heard that you're moving a certain blonde runner into your little love shack in the woods." Wes smiled greasily, apparently trying for a chummy buddy-buddy type of conversation and failing spectacularly.
"And if I am?" Adrian asked, feigning interest.
"Whatever pops your cork, man, but I figured I'd better warn you; if you're looking for a 'girlfriend' you might want to reconsider your choice. Or, at least, look for someone who actually puts out."
All three of the boys laughed at that, nasty snorting giggles that caused heads to start turning in their direction. Adrian struggled to hold on to his instant and instinctive rage at that comment, and smiled a thin dangerous smile at the thugs.
"Thanks for the tip; I'll keep that in mind."
Wes punched Adrian's shoulder in faux solidarity, hitting him far harder than was strictly necessary. Adrian didn't flinch, watching in speculation as the trio quickly marched out of the dining area and off to who knew where. His appetite completely gone, he didn't bother getting anything for himself when he reached the front of the line. Grabbing a portion for Newt, he made a beeline to where he'd seen the boy settle. The blonde appeared to be in the middle of a mild argument with his runner friend when the man approached the table, though both parties cut off abruptly when they noticed him coming. Adrian slid the bowl of beef and potatoes in front of Newt, nodding a greeting to Minho.
"I just remembered that there were a couple of things I was going to ask Alby about." Adrian announced, not bothering to sit down. "I'll join you guys later."
"What about your dinner?" Newt demanded, stopping the man before he could leave.
"I had a big lunch, so I'm not really hungry. I can always grab something later." Adrian said, brushing off the boy's concern and striding away purposefully. He vaguely heard them start arguing again as he was leaving, but intentionally ignored the words and left them to sort out their own differences as he sought out the leader of the glade.
He found Alby on the far side of the area, leaning against a tree and half-listening to the joking and squabbling of the boys at the nearest tables. Adrian was glad to see that he was, for once, pretty much alone and instantly seized the moment.
"Hey. Mind if I steal you for a few?" He greeted the boy, sliding his hands into his pockets and slanting a glance at the unoccupied forest adjacent. "There's a couple of things I want to pick your brain about. Care to join me for a walk?"
Alby nodded in agreement and fell into step beside the man, easily picking up on his desire for privacy. As soon as they were out of earshot of the rest of the gladers, Alby shot a sharp look at Adrian.
"Newt?"
"Nah." Adrian reassured. "No worries there. He'll be good as new before you know it."
"What's up, then?" Alby asked curiously.
Biding his time, wanting to put a little more distance between them and possible eavesdroppers, Adrian started outlining his ideas for building public outhouses; he explained the general construction of the facilities, the benefits to the gladers versus the burden of the initial outlay of effort and materials, and the possible locations that would be most appropriate for such a construction. They dickered over details and the pros and cons until they were deep in the woods, and Adrian was sure that they were absolutely alone. Once they'd come to an agreement with the nuts and bolts of the idea, Adrian broached the other subject that was on his mind.
"Since I got here, I've been mostly keeping to myself at night; sleeping alone in the privacy of either the med-hut or my own place." Adrian began, choosing each word with care. "Now, I've got no issues letting Newt crash at my place while he heals; if it bothered me, I wouldn't have offered. Having him there, however, does bring something else to mind. You guys mostly sleep in fairly close quarters; rows of hammocks and sleeping bags grouped together under one main roof, yeah?"
"That's right." Alby confirmed, confused as to the direction of Adrian's thoughts.
"Well, knowing full well that we're stuck here, together, and realizing that privacy is at a premium, I was wondering how to go about getting a bit of...personal time." Adrian explained delicately. "Sometimes you've got to...take care of business, and I much prefer doing so without an audience. If you get my meaning"
"Yeah, I got you." Alby replied, oddly relieved at the direction the conversation had taken. After all, they were all guys, all in their prime, and they all had needs. One of the most common things a greenie asked about was so called 'personal time' and all of the senior gladers were very familiar with the term. Adrian's rather tactful wording was a welcome change from the normal crude phrasing usually used by frustrated randy boys, and he reworded his usual answer to match.
"Most of the guys who've been here for any length of time do what needs to be done in bed after dark; after a while you get used to the night noise of so many people and just tune it out, like the snoring. No one can see anything else in the dark anyway, and most of the guys try to be as considerate about their activities as they can. As for those who are looking for a bit more privacy...they usually pick a place out in the woods to do their thing, somewhere that another glader isn't likely to come bumbling across them and ruin the mood."
"I figured that was the answer." Adrian sighed, projecting an air of resignation. "Going solo is going to get real old, real fast. You'd think that the least those slimy bastards that sent us here could do would be to send us up a little companionship, at least once in a while."
Alby hesitated, glancing around to check that they were still alone.
"Actually," He said quietly, "There is an alternative."
Adrian quirked a brow, feigning disbelief.
"Really, now? You've got a couple of lovelies with a certain lack of morals hidden away in the salal, do you?"
"Not exactly." Alby shifted, a little uncomfortable with this explanation, as he always was. There was no telling exactly how a greenie would react to this particular topic, and he wasn't partial to a bloody nose should the conversation take an ugly turn.
"There are a number of guys who are...willing to...lend a hand, so to speak. They scratch your back, you scratch theirs. Most of us end up going there sooner or later. As long as both're willing, there's nothing wrong with getting a bit of 'help'."
Alby heaved a great internal sigh of gratitude when Adrian accepted the information without batting an eye, even nodding in an understanding way.
"Perfectly reasonable." Adrian agreed, rubbing a hand over his chin and thinking deeply. Satisfied with his reaction, sympathetic to the man's situation, Alby made a sudden decision to impart one last piece of information. After all; he was a grown man, coming to them from the outside world where there was surely a variety of choices. Being cut off from everything he used to have - and being able to remember it - might even be even more hellish than being stuck here with no memories at all. He took one last paranoid scan of their surroundings, uneasy but determined to see this through. His voice dropped even lower, until he was all but whispering.
"There's one more thing. I don't usually share this with a greenie; a lot of the guys don't know about this, and some of the shanks who do are pretty against it. I'd appreciate it if you'd keep this part under your hat."
Adrian nodded assent, his gaze level and non-judgmental. He had a pretty good idea as to what came next.
"There are...three guys that offer...the full package, so to speak." Alby managed, "Most can't get past the idea of doing...it...with a guy, so they primarily keep to themselves. But I swear, it's like they're always up for it, and they've learned the hard way to be very, very discreet. If you can stomach the idea, and you find you need something more than just a hand in the dark, I'll give you their names."
"I appreciate you taking the time to answer my questions, and I'm honored that you'd trust me with this - rather sensitive - information." Adrian said softly, sincerity ringing in his voice. "I imagine those three have probably had a rough go of it here, and things could get pretty ugly for them if this was made public. I won't breathe a shred of this to anyone, you have my word."
In tactic agreement, the duo turned and started back towards the dining area. A few minutes before they would have stepped out of the trees, Alby reached out a hand to stop the man for a moment, keeping his voice low and neutral.
"Do you want those names?"
Adrian looked him right in the eyes, lighting a cigarette and inhaling deeply, considering.
"...Yeah. I do."
Alby didn't flinch; no condemnation or revulsion showed on his face. He crossed the distance to the dining area and, staying concealed behind a poorly built section of wall from one of the supply huts in the area, cautiously peeked around the corner and sought out the faces of the boys he was looking for. Finally spotting them, he waved Adrian over, pointing out a group of six or seven that were loitering around a table at the edge of the area.
"The tall skinny blonde guy is Alec. The shorter, kinda chubby one with the dark pony tail is Stephen. And the dark skinned guy across from them, average build and shaved head, that's Brandon. Alec and Stephen are sloppers, Brandon's with the track-hos. The few guys with them are their close friends, and they don't seem to have a problem with their...appetites, but I'd wait and approach them when their alone, if I were you."
"Thanks man." Adrian intoned, clapping a hand to Alby's shoulder, and committing the names and faces to memory. They'd come in handy later. Each went their separate ways, slickly sliding back into the now area without anyone noticing. Mindful of the asian boy's dislike of his habit and taking care to keep his smoke from wafting over Minho, Adrian joined him and Newt at the table where they lingered. The air was a little tense, and the man deliberately spoke in a joking tone to change the mood.
"Why so serious, boys? Discussing world peace?"
"What was that about? Why the sudden need to run off, just out of the blue?" Newt demanded, ignoring both Adrian's comment and Minho's frustrated stare.
"Just a couple of things I needed to ask our fearless leader about. Hashing out plans for the next project, negotiating details, sorting out placement, that kind of thing. Can't get started until all the tedious bits are worked out." Adrian said breezily, looking across at Minho and tilting his head in acknowledgement of the boy's suspicious gaze.
"What project? What are you-"
"I swear, you just never run out of questions. Since you're just dying to know, it's the same project I told you about this afternoon. And speaking of projects, there are a few things I want to work on tonight, so I better head home and get started. You can wander over when-"
"I'll come with you." Newt interjected, wincing his way to his feet. Minho let out a disgusted snort and rose as well, turning and walking away without bothering to say anything at all. Shaking his head at the other runner's attitude, the man held out a hand to steady Newt as he extracted himself from the bench.
"Start heading back; I've got to grab a couple things. I'll be right behind you."
Walking into the cook hut, it took only moments for Adrian to find the supplies he wanted and liberate them from the cheerfully helpful cook. Raiding the general supply hut took a little longer and, by the time he caught up with Newt, it was getting dark. The boy was almost half way back to the house, breathing hard and limping painfully, moving forward with dogged determination. Intentionally making noise so as to not startle him, Adrian stepped up beside him and once again slipped an arm around Newt's slender frame, supporting him the rest of the way.
The relatively short trip had been exhausting for Newt, and he gratefully eased down onto the couch as soon as they got inside. Adrian bustled about; bringing the boy his medicine, closing the shutters, and lighting candles that filled the house with a warm homey glow. As Newt relaxed and tried to catch his breath, Adrian got out a flat cardboard box and sat at the new tall table. To Newt's baffled fascination, he began pulling out bundle after bundle of...
"What the bloody hell are you going to do with that?"
Adrian flashed him a cheeky grin, hands busily sorting dozens of little bundles of hair into piles according to length.
"Nothing goes to waste. With a little imagination, you really can make something from nothing."
Shaking his head at the non-answer, Newt scooted down until he was laying in a flat out sprawl, toeing off his shoes and relishing the sinful comfort of the cushions. Hearing the boy release a deep weary sigh, Adrian abandoned his activity for the moment and went over to the bed, retrieving his player and bringing it over to the couch. A little leery about sharing his prize possession, but wanting to offer Newt a bit of escape, he held out the earbuds.
"Put these in your ears. I want to show you something."
Newt obliged, a little confused. The man thumbed a couple of buttons on the little square, scrolling through until he got to a specific set of songs. Programming a list and turning the volume down to low, he hit play. Newt's eyes popped open wide as the music began to play in his head.
.
Sometimes in our lives
We all have pain
We all have sorrow
.
But if we are wise
We know that there's
Always tomorrow
.
Lean on me
When you're not strong
And I'll be your friend
I'll help you carry on
.
For it won't be long
'Til I'm gonna need
.
Somebody to lean on
.
"What...how..."
"Music has always been a huge part of who I am; it's freedom, release, comfort. It can lift you when you're low and soothe you when you're running hot. Just listen. Immerse yourself. Let it take you away for a while."
Adrian spoke with reverence, and a truly profound love. The emotion in his voice was so genuine, so stark, Newt could feel a hot prickle at the back of his eyes. He closed them quickly, to ward off the tears he couldn't quite understand. A wide, warm palm rested gently on his forehead for a moment, a fleeting gesture of care and support before the man walked away. Listening, focused on absorbing as much as he could, Newt did as the man asked and let the music carry him away.
Adrian returned to the table and continued sorting the little pony tails, finally ending up with five piles that satisfied him. Pulling out some soft old rags, thread and a needle, he worked intently for hours. He glanced over periodically, checking on the boy as he slept; he was silent, still, and peaceful. When the night was more than half gone, Adrian tucked his project into the box with the leftover hair and stowed it away, exhausted but satisfied at his progress. As he was slumping his way towards the bed, he heard a little hiccoughing sound and changed directions, quickly going to Newt. The boy's eyebrows were drawn together and his brow furrowed, his face was pale and showed a light sheen of sweat. His breathing increased in speed as he squirmed a little in his sleep, making a sound like that of a cornered animal deep down in his throat; the sight ripped at Adrian's heart.
Ever so lightly he placed his hand back on Newt's head, hoping to pacify him without exacerbating things. The boy stopped moving and moaning but his body stayed tense, his mind clearly receiving conflicting messages. Adrian lifted the little music player with his free hand and, with a glance, confirmed his suspicion; it had finished running through the customized list, leaving Newt in utter silence. When he restarted the list, Adrian swore he could actually feel the tension start to drain out of the boy's body. As the music threaded into his slumbering consciousness and released him from whatever dream had him in its grip he was, quite quickly, once again peacefully sleeping.
Adrian removed his hand, sighing in relief. Watching Newt for a moment just to assure himself that everything was alright, confident that the boy was fully asleep, he whispered the thoughts that had been circling his head for the last few hours.
"I can't go back and undo what was done to you; I can't save you from the past. But I can—I will—stop it from happening again. And, maybe, if I do this just right, I can make sure that no one else ever has to suffer like you did. Lean on me, kid, I won't let you down."
Heaving himself to his feet, Adrian shuffled over to his bed and unceremoniously flopped onto it face first. Those five words repeated over and over in his head as he slipped into an exhausted sleep, words that rang with steely determination.
I won't let you down.
Author's note~
The song in this chapter is Lean On Me by Al Green
See you next time!
~Ruby