Chapter 2: Life on Mars
The Doctor had immediately invited them all on another outing, and they had all, surprised, agreed. Jack hadn't seem too shocked, however, and neither had Amy or Rory. So maybe this had been the plan all along. Jessica couldn't say that she entirely minded.
The longer she could hold onto this feeling - of adventure, of distance, of hope - the better.
The Doctor showed them each to a room - besides Jack, who apparently had one already, which Ianto moved his single bag into, and the Ponds. They were all right next to each other, which Jessica between Luke's and Trish's. She'd half hoped that Luke would move in with her, but she supposed the distance was good. They had resolved to try, but that didn't mean they had to jump the gun and start sleeping together right away.
Maybe this was going to be a real relationship.
All the rooms were unexpectedly large. But then, the TARDIS itself was, so maybe that should have been less of a surprise. Jessica hadn't even known that there had been bedrooms at all until the Doctor had shown them all into the long hallways beyond the console room.
Jessica had a solid dresser made of dark wood, and a wardrobe to go along with it. The bed was huge, and already made up with dark gray sheets and a thick comforter, with a soft throw blanket folded at the foot. It was nice. Thoughtful. Jessica could hardly believe it. There was a bathroom attached to the room as well, fully stocked with hair products and toothpaste and body wash, and the nicest, most confusing shower Jessica had ever laid eyes on.
She wondered, again, how exactly she'd ended up in this position. Was it bad luck, or good luck? Maybe a mix of both.
She went on a trip to the wardrobe room with Trish and Luke to find a few more changes of clothes, and she was struck again by the largeness of it all. The wardrobe room was absolutely gigantic, and full to the brim of all manner of clothes - old Victorian getups and 50s-style dresses, a hatrack piled with the most ridiculous headgear, rows and rows and rows of pants and shirts. Even drawers full of underwear and bras.
They each came away with several shirts and pairs of pants. Trish even made off with a few pairs of shoes.
They returned again before their next trip the next day, to pick up bathing suits, as the Doctor had promised them a beach trip.
"Alien beach," he said, as they filed into the console room. "Earth beaches are all well and good - but alien beaches are more fun."
And then he took them to an alien city, on a planet Jessica couldn't have pronounced the name of if she tried. They got a fair share of strange looks from the population, but it was almost nice to get a few second-glances. Different. They stopped in a nice restaurant for dinner, and stuffed themselves with weird alien foods, and Jessica didn't even have to worry about the bill.
It felt like a dream - the best kind of dream.
And if Jessica stepped carefully around the Doctor, he didn't mention it. And if the Ponds noticed, they kept their curiosity to nothing but critical glances.
They assembled for a movie at the end of the day, exhausted and a little sunburnt. Jessica leaned her head on Luke's shoulder, and her heart fluttered as he leaned into her. It all seemed so fragile, and Jessica expected it to shatter at any moment, but it didn't. Whether it was going to further in the future was yet to be seen, but for now...it held. Luke joined her in bed that night - they didn't have sex, but she was fine with just feeling him beside her, having his warmth heat up her covers.
The next morning, they all met for breakfast. Not by any spoken decision, but simply by chance. The Doctor was making coffee for ; Trish had set to work on her usual scrambled eggs. The Ponds were sat at the table, chattering and smiling at each other as young couples do. Trish cracked more eggs into the pan as Jack and Ianto entered the kitchen soon after Jessica and Luke.
They ate together, the Doctor bantering with Jack, Trish exchanging words with the Ponds. Jessica offered a few carefully-considered words of her own into the Doctor's conversation, and felt an unspeakable relief as he met them cheerfully.
She still wasn't sure how to act around him. She couldn't help but feel uncertain about their every interaction, and she had no idea what to make of him. He hadn't mentioned how they'd met even once so far, nor the events following that. Neither had Jack. They both seemed content to pretend it had never happened. It wasn't so easy for Jessica, and she suspected Trish and Luke were having similar problems. Luke's smiles came a little too wooden when aimed in the Doctor's direction. Trish always spoke a little too shrilly, and her words were always a little unsure.
Jessica figured maybe comfort would simply come in time. But if it never did, she wouldn't be surprised. After all, when he'd left, the Doctor had been fairly certain he was going to become Kilgrave. And though saying he hadn't been upset about it would have been an outright lie, he had...come to terms with it? Accepted it? The thought of that twisted Jessica's stomach. And he'd done it with the aliens, too - let them take their research with an "it already happened."
She wanted to ask about it, but it felt distant on the TARDIS. It hadn't happened anyway, after all. Maybe it said some unsavory things about his character, but Jessica could ignore that if it meant she would be seeing the universe. And with a new face and a new body and most of a new personality - he was pretty much a different person, in her head. The Doctor she'd first met and this one were firmly separated in her mind. Two different Doctors entirely. And he seemed to have forgotten about everything completely, anyway.
Still, it stayed on her mind. A thrum of unease that she couldn't quite get rid of - but it was easily enough ignored.
In any case, she could pretend - it was a skill she'd learned a long time ago. When the Doctor made a joke, she could laugh or scowl in disapproval at him, depending on the situation. When he deflected from any serious conversation, she could go along with it. They distracted themselves with the food, and the promise of adventure.
That night, they went to what the Doctor claimed was "the best stargazing spot in the universe." Jessica, wrapped in her old jacket, was the last out of the TARDIS, and so was the last to hold back a gasp of surprise as she looked upward. The others had barely made it out of the door, as shocked as they were. Jessica struggled to get out far enough to close the doors behind her.
She could see galaxies in the night sky. Swirling patterns of stars in all manner of colors. She could see other planets, even, close enough to be clear outlines against the backdrop of stars; stars that shone so brightly that many of the planets were nothing more than silhouettes.
"Holy shit," she breathed. She looked to Luke, who still had his head craned backwards. An awed smile stretched over his face, his lips slightly parted. The stars shone in his eyes, lighting them up like diamonds, almost more breathtaking than the scenery. Their light turned his skin the slightest bit silver.
He caught her staring at him, and met her eyes with a wonder-filled grin. Her heart jumped in her chest, just a little bit.
"It's beautiful, isn't it?" the Doctor said. He stretched his arms out, beaming. "We live in a gorgeous universe!"
Jessica thought of the grimy rags of the homeless on New York City streets; of her dirty apartment, stained with memories she would rather forget; of the sobs of broken-hearted wives over the phone. And Kilgrave. And those same types of things, and worse, existed all over Earth, and surely throughout the universe as well. Perhaps in even greater magnitudes beyond their little planet. And yet, despite all of that, her chest ached with the strength of her agreement as she tilted her head back to see the stars again.
Amy and Rory, with some help from Ianto and Jack, laid out the blankets they'd brought from inside. Luke and Trish passed out glasses of wine. In the warm air, similar to early Earth summer, the glasses were icy, and the wine itself pleasantly cool. It tasted far sweeter than any alcohol Jessica had become accustomed to over the years. She missed, for a moment, her glasses of whiskey. The flask at her belt had long since gone empty. She hadn't much needed it. But the wine was nice. Different. Another change that separated 'now' from 'then.'
All eight of them crowded onto the blankets, bundling up sweatshirts and jackets to use as headrests, so as to make it easy to lie down and drink at the same time.
"Cheers!" Jack called, and everyone else echoed him. Jessica, crammed between Trish and Luke, clinked her glass against theirs. Jessica watched as the Doctor took a sip of his wine, and then immediately spat it out.
"Doctor," Amy scolded. He tried again, this time gulping it down with a grimace. "You always do this," she continued, though she sounded amused.
"Alcohol tastes bad," the Doctor complained. "It just always surprises me."
"Don't be a baby."
Jessica hid her smile in her glass.
Silence fell as conversation died down and they became distracted again by the sight above them. Or at least, it was silent until the Doctor spoke up, excitedly pointing a finger upward.
"That's the constellation of Erh-Lang," he said. "There, it looks like a shield. If you sort of tilt your head. And there, that group of stars is the Disen constellation. Well, that's what you would call them on Earth. Here, they have other names." He made a few strange sounds, nasally and high-pitched.
Jessica shook her head, half in amusement, half in disbelief. The Doctor kept listing stars and constellations and galaxies, pointing this way and that, naming them in English and the apparent native language of their current location.
"So you're a real space expert?" Trish asked, a smile in her voice.
"Oh, absolutely," the Doctor exclaimed. "I know almost everything about almost every star in the universe! I've done my research."
"Well, you are an alien," Ianto remarked, bemused.
"I don't know what I know based solely on the fact that I'm not human, Jones. I may have slightly more knowledge than you lot on Earth simply based on the fact that I can travel further, but that doesn't mean you can't learn!" the Doctor said. "There are plenty of stars to be seen from Earth. Plenty to learn about."
"Not everybody has the time," Ianto pointed out.
The Doctor hummed. "I suppose that's true. Humans. Very, very...short-lived." He fell silent, curiously, almost darkly, silent. Jessica thought about what that implied, and then found herself wondering again exactly how old the Doctor was. He made it sound like...
Jack cleared his throat. "Well. I know that one's called Pele." He pointed toward a bright reddish star.
"Named after the Hawaiian god of volcanoes," Luke spoke up. "Because of the red, I assume."
"Exactly so," the Doctor jumped in. "It's got a couple planets, that one. Named after other fire and volcano gods, so it happens. Nice places, but not very habitable. Mineral planets."
Jessica elbowed Luke, evoking a sideways smile from him. "Since when do you know about Hawaiian gods?"
That smile turned sheepish. "I did a project in school, back when I was a kid. Kind of stuck with me."
"Well, you lot do love to name things after your gods," the Doctor said. "Good thing to learn about. History! Heritage! People make careers out of that."
Luke chuckled, laying back against his wadded-up sweatshirt and taking a sip of his wine. He looked peaceful, glowing slightly silver, the light of the stars still shining in his eyes and on his face.
"What's that one?" Rory inquired, pointing up.
The Doctor happily obliged him. "That's part of the Lada Formation - all of the blue there, that's it. It's amazing to stand in. The TARDIS fits right in out there."
The blue swept in a beautiful spiral, distant and bright. It wasn't too far from Pele, which glinted merrily beside several other constellations. The Doctor named a few more, only pausing to take another wincing gulp of wine.
Jessica pillowed her head on Luke's chest once her drink was finished. It wasn't enough alcohol for her to feel anything at all, but it warmed her insides just the slightest bit. Jack made a bad joke, and Amy laughed. Trish asked about a different star, and the Doctor told her what he knew. Jessica listened to Luke's heart beating steadily under her ear, and closed her eyes.
Silence fell again, for much longer this time. All Jessica could hear was the soft breathing of those around her, and Luke's heart. The air was turning chilly as the night progressed, and she draped her jacket over her torso like a blanket, pulling her legs in closer.
She opened her eyes again and stared up at the sky. It didn't get any less amazing. The longer she looked, the more stars she found, the more colors, the more patterns and constellations. It was terrifying and beautiful in equal measure.
"I suppose you'll want to go home," the Doctor ventured, more subdued than Jessica had heard him so far. Not unhappy, exactly, but something close. "I've kept you for longer than I said I would."
Jessica mulled this over. The thought of familiarity tempted her - memories of her own bed, of the Hell's Kitchen streets she knew better than her own face, of the routine of her normal life.
The stars overhead seemed to wink at her.
"Why?" Luke asked.
The Doctor coughed, sounding self-conscious. "I was having fun with you all. It's been a good time. I figured maybe-"
"No," Luke interrupted, "why would we want to go home?"
Silence. Then, the Doctor laughed, somewhat nervously. "Well. I don't know. It's nice, home. Nice to have a place to...are you saying you want to stay?"
"I think that's what he's saying," Amy piped up. Humor colored her voice. "Come on, Doctor. You know you don't actually want them to leave."
"The rest of you, you want to come along?" the Doctor asked. Jessica didn't expect him to sound so hopeful.
She gazed up at the stars. She could go home. It would be easy, like she had never left. She'd seen the universe, more than anyone else she knew could ever hope to see in their lives. She could be content with heading back.
But it didn't feel right, not entirely. Something itched at her - maybe it was the need to patch things up with Luke completely before they returned to their normal lives. Or the desire to know more about Jack and the Doctor, and who exactly they were. Or get any kind of answers, at all.
Besides that, though...sure, she'd been to a few places - but there was so much left to see. Looking up at the endless stars, going on and on into eternity, fading into the black of space, solidified that for her.
"Sure," she said.
Trish, a smile evident by the tone of her voice, pitched in an "absolutely."
"You know I'm in," Jack said. "Ianto?"
"I don't think I'm ready to go back just yet," Ianto admitted.
The Doctor hummed - a deep, satisfied sound. "Okay," he said. It sounded like he might be smiling, too. "Okay."
Whew! Sorry it took me so long everyone, the writer's block was intense the past few weeks. But I feel like I'm in a good enough place now with enough of this story to start posting more regularly! :) My school schedule is a little crazy, so at some point I might have to start doing updates every other week, but we'll see about that. So far, so good. For now, I'm planning to update every Tuesday afternoon.
I hope the wait was worth it, and I hope you're all excited for the next installment! Please let me know what you all thought :)