If it was anyone but Julie,I thought to myself, shaking my head as I drove down the forest-lined highway to La Push.

I still wasn't sure if I was doing the right thing, but I'd made a compromise with myself.

I couldn't condone what Julie and her friends, her pack, were doing. I understood now what she'd said last night—that I might not want to see her again—and I could have called her as she'd suggested, but that felt cowardly. I owed her a face-to-face conversation, at least. I would tell her to her face that I didn't know how to overlook what was going on. I didn't know how to be friends with a killer and say nothing, let the killing continue… That would make me a monster, too.

But I couldn't not warn her, either. I had to do what I could to protect her.

I pulled up to the Blacks' house with my lips pressed together into a hard line. It was bad enough that my best friend was a werewolf. Did she have to be a monster, too?

The house was dark, no lights in the windows, but I didn't care if I woke them. My fist thudded against the front door with fervent energy; the sound reverberated through the walls.

"Come in," I heard Billy call after a minute, and a light flicked on.

I twisted the knob; it was unlocked. Billy was leaning around an open doorway just off the little kitchen, a bathrobe around his shoulders, not in his chair yet. When he saw who it was, his eyes widened briefly, and then his face turned stoic.

"Well, good morning, Bella. What are you doing up so early?"

"Hey, Billy. I need to talk to Julie—where is she?"

"Um… I don't really know," he lied, straight faced.

"Do you know what Charlie is doing this morning?" I demanded, frustrated by the stalling.

"Should I?"

"He and half the other men in town are all out in the woods with guns, hunting giant wolves."

Billy's expression flickered, and then went blank.

"So I'd like to talk to Julie about that, if you don't mind," I continued.

Billy pursed his lips for a long moment. "I'd bet she's still asleep," he finally said, nodding toward the tiny hallway off the front room. "She's out late a lot these days. Kid needs her rest—probably you shouldn't wake her."

"It's my turn," I muttered under my breath as I stalked to the hallway. Billy sighed.

Julie's tiny closet of a room was the only door in the yard-long hallway. I didn't bother to knock. I threw the door open; it slammed against the wall with a bang.

Julie—still wearing just the same black cut-off sweats she'd worn last night—was stretched diagonall across the double bed that took up all of her room but a few inches around the edges. Even on a slant, it wasn't long enough; her feet hung off the one end and her head off the other. She was fast asleep, snoring lightly with her mouth hanging open. The sound of the door hadn't even made her twitch.

Her face was peaceful with deep sleep, all the angry lines smoothed out. There were circles under her eyes that I hadn't noticed before. Despite her ridiculous size, she looked very young now, and very wear, and very much like my Julie.

I started to step back out of the room, but I paused and looked down at Julie's face. I couldn't stop myself from moving closer to her. I reached out my hand and ran it through her shorn hair. My hand gently caressed her face; this one the face I knew, the face I missed. I sighed, slowly turned, and walked out of the room, shutting the door quietly behind me.

"I think I'll let her get some rest."

Billy nodded, and then we gazed at each other for a minute. I was dying to ask him about his part in this. What did he think of what his daughter had become? But I knew how he'd supported Sam from the very beginning, and so I supposed the murders must not bother him. How he justified that to himself I couldn't imagine.

I could see many questions for me in his dark eyes, but he didn't voice them either.

"Look," I said breaking the loud silence. "I'll be down at the beach for a while. When she wakes up, tell her I'm waiting for her, okay?"

"Sure, sure," Billy agreed.

I wondered if he really would. Well, if he didn't, I'd tried, right?

I drove down to First Beach and parked in the empty dirt lot. It was still dark—the gloomy predawn of a cloudy day—and when I cut the headlights it was hard to see. I had to let my eyes adjust before I could find the path that led through the tall hedge of weeds. It was colder here, with the wind whipping off the black water, and I shoved my hands deep into the pockets of my winter jacket. At least the rain had stopped.

I paced down the beach toward the north seawall. I couldn't see St. James or the other islands, just the vague shape of the water's edge. I picked my way carefully across the rocks, watching out for driftwood that might trip me.

I found what I was looking for before I realized I was looking for it. It materialized out of the gloom when it was just a few feet away: a long bone-white driftwood tree stranded deep on the rocks. The roots twisted up at the seaward end, like a hundred brittle tentacles. I couldn't be sure that it was the same tree where Julie and I had had our first conversation—a conversation that had begun many different, tangled threads of my life—but it seemed to be in about the same place. I sat down where I'd sat before, and stared out across the invisible sea.

Seeing Julie like that—innocent and vulnerable in sleep—had stolen all my revulsion, dissolved all my anger. I still couldn't turn a blind eye to what was happening, like Billy seemed to, but I couldn't comdemn Julie for it either. Love didn't work that way, I decided. Once you cared about a person, it was impossible to be logical about them Anymore Julie was still my friend, she was still my Julie, whether she killed people or not. And I didn't know what I was going to do about that.

When I pictured her sleeping so peacefully, I felt an overpowering urge to protect her. Completely illogical.

Illogical or not, I brooded over the memory of her face, trying to come up with some answer, some way to shelter her, while the sky slowly turned gray.

"Hi, Bella."

Julie's voice came from the darkness and made me jump. It was soft, almost shy, but I'd been expecting some forewarning from the noisy rocks, and so it still startled me. I could see her silhouette against the coming sunrise—it looked enormous.

"Jules?"

She stoked several paces away, shifting her weight from foot to foot anxiously.

"Billy told me you came by—didn't take you very long, did it? I knew you could figure it out."

"Yeah, I remember the story now," I whispered.

It was quiet for a long moment and, thought it was still too dark to see well, my skin prickled as if her eyes were searching my face. There must have been enough light for her to read my expression, because when she spoke again, her voice was suddenly acidic.

"You could have just called," she said harshly.

I nodded. "I know."

Julie started pacing along the rocks. If I listened very hard, I could hear the gentle brush of her feet on the rocks behind the sound of the waves. The rocks had clattered like castanets for me.

"Why did you come?" she demanded, not halting her angry stride.

"I thought it would be better face-to-face."

She snorted. "Oh, much better."

"Julie, I have to warn you—"

"About the rangers and the hunters? Don't worry about it. We already know."

"Don't worry about it?" I demanded in disbelief. "Julie, they've got guns! They're setting traps and offering rewards and—"

"We can take care of ourselves," she growled, still pacing. "They're not going to catch anything. They're only making it more difficult—they'll start disappearing soon enough, too."

Julie!" I hissed.

"What? It's just a fact."

My voice was shaky with disbelief. "How can you… feel tht way? You know these people. Charlie's out there!" The thought made my stomach twist.

She came to an abrupt stop. "What more can we do?" she retorted.

The sun turned the clouds a silvery pink above us. I could see her expression now; it was angry, frustrated, betrayed.

"Could you… well, just… I don't know,not be a… werewolf?" I asked in a whisper.

She threw her hands up in the air. "Like I have a choice about it!" she shouted. "And how would that help anything if you're worried about people disappearing?"

"I don't understand."

She glared at me, her eyes narrowing and her mouth twisting into a snarl. "You know what makes me so mad I could just spit?"

I flinched away from her hostile expression. She seemed to be waiting for an answer, so I shook my head.

"You're such a hyprocrite, Bella—there you sit,terrified of me! How is that fair?" Her hands shook with anger.

"Hypocrite? How does being afraid of a monster make me a hypocrite?" I regretted the words as soon as I said them.

"Ugh!" she groaned, pressing her trembling fists to her temples and squeezing her eyes shut. "Would you listen to yourself?"

"What?"

She took two steps toward me, leaning over me and glaring with fury. "Well, I'm so sorry that I can't be the right kind of monster for you, Bella. I guess I'm just not as great as a bloodsucker, am I?"

I jumped to my feet and glared back, my own emotions getting the better of me. "No, you're not!" I shouted. "It's not what you are, stupid, it's what you do!"

"What's that supposed to mean?" She roared, her entire frame quivering with rage.

I was taken aback by her anger, by the intensity behind her fury. I knew I couldn't push her any farther. I had to calm her down.

"Jules," I pleaded, making my tone soft and even. "Is it really necessary to kill people, Julie? Isn't there some other way? I mean, if vampires can find a way to survive without murdering people, couldn't you find a way, too?"

She straightened up with a jerk, like my words had sent an electric shock through her. Her eyebrows shot up and her eyes stared wide.

"Killing people?" she demanded.

"What did you think we were talking about?"

She wasn't trembling anymore. She looked at me with half-hopeful disbelief. "I thought were were talking about your disgust for werewolves."

"No, Jules, no. It's not that you're a… wolf. That's fine," I promised her, and I knew as I said the words that I mean them. I really didn't care if she turned into a big wolf—she was still Julie—my Julie. "If you could just find a way not to hurt people… that's all that upsets me. These are innocent people, Jules, people like Charlie, and I can't just look the other way while you—"

"Is that all? Really?' she interrupted me, a smile breaking across her face. "You're just scared because I'm a murderer? That's the only reason?"

"Isn't that reason enough?"

She started to laugh.

"Julie Black, this is so not funny!"

"Sure, sure," she agreed, still chortling.

She took one long stride and caught me in another vice-tight bear hug.

"You really, honestly don't mind that I morph into a giant dog?" she asked, her voice joyful in my ear.

"No," I gasped. "Can't—breathe—Jules!"

she let me go, but took both my hands. "I'm not a killer, Bella."

I studied her face, and it was clear that this was the truth. Relief pulsed through me.

"Really?" I asked.

"Really," she promised solemnly.

I threw my arms around her. The joy I felt was incomprehensible. Julie wasn't a murderer, Julie wasn't a monster. I felt a sense of relief I hadn't felt in a long time.

Julie gently stroked my hair and I sighed deeply.

"Sorry I called you a hypocrite," she apologized.

"Sorry I called you a murderer."

She laughed.

I thought of something then, and pulled away from her so that I could see her face. My eyebrows furrowed in anxiety. "What about Sam? And the others?"

She shook her head, smiling like a huge burden had been removed from her shoulders. "Of course not. Don't you remember what we call ourselves?"

The memory was clear—I'd just been thinking of that very day. "Protectors?"

"Exactly."

"But I don't understand. What's happening in the woods? The missing hikers, the blood?"

Her face was serious, worried at once. "We're trying to do our Job, Bella. We're trying to protect them, but we're always just a little too late."

"Protect them from what? Is there really a bear out there, too?"

"Bella, we only protect people from one thing—our one enemy. It's the reason we exist—because they do."

I stared at her blankly for one second before I understood. Then the blood drained from my face and a thin, wordless cry of horror broke through my lips.

She nodded. "I thought you, of all people, would realize what was really going on."

"Laurent," I whispered. "He's still here."

Julie blinked twice, and clocked her head to one side. "Who's Laurent?"

I tried to sort out the chaos in my head so that I could answer. "You know—you saw him in the meadow. You were there…" The words came out in a wondering tone as it all sunk in. "You were there, and you kept him from killing me…."

"Oh, the black-haired leech?" She grinned, a tight, fierce grin. "Was that his name?"

I shuddered. "What were you thinking?" I whispered. "He could have killed you! Jules, you don't realize how dangerous—"

Another laugh interrupted me. "Bella, one lone vampire isn't much of a problem for a pack as big as ours. It was so easy, it was hardly even fun!"

"What was so easy?"

"Killing the bloodsucker who was going to kill you. Now, I don't count that towards the whole murder thing," she added quickly. "Vampires don't count as people."

I stared at her in disbelief. "You…killed Laurent?"

She nodded. "Well, it was a group effort," she qualified.

"Laurent is dead?" I whispered, more to myself than her.

Her expression changed. "You're not upset about that, are you? He was going to kill you—he was going for the kill, Bella, we were sure of that before we attacked. You know that, right?"

"I know that. Of course, of course. And I'm grateful, really. I'm not upset—I'm…" I had to sit down. I stumbled back a step until I felt the driftwood against my calves, and then sank down onto it. "Laurent is dead. He's not coming back for me."

"You're not mad? He wasn't one of your friends or anything, was he?"

"My friend?" I stared up at her, confused and dizzy with relief. "No, Jules. I'm so… so relieved. I thought he was going to find me—I've been waiting for him every night, just hoping that he'd stop with me and leave Charlie alone. I've been so frightened, Jules…. But how? He was a vampire! How did you kill him? He was so strong, so hard, like marble…."

She sat down next to me and put one big arm around me comfortingly. I instinctively leaned into her. "It's what we're made for, Bella. We're strong, too. I wish you would have told me that you were so afraid. You didn't need to be."

"You weren't around," I mumbled, sadly.

"Oh, right."

"Wait, Jules—I thought you knew, though. Last night, you said it wasn't safe for you to be in my room. I thought you knew that a vampire might be coming. Isn't that what you were talking about?"

She looked confused for a minute, and then she ducked her head. "No, that's not what I meant."

"Then why didn't you think it was safe for you there?"

She looked at me with guilt-ridden eyes. "I didn't say it wasn't safe for me. I was thinking of you."

"What do you mean?"

She looked down and kicked a rock. "There's more than one reason I'm not supposed to be around you, Bella. I wasn't supposed to tell you our secret, for one thing, but the other part is that it's not safe for you. If I get too mad… too upset… you might get hurt."

I thought about that carefully. "When you were mad before… When I was yelling at you… and you were shaking…?"

"Yeah." Her face dropped even lower. "That was pretty stupid of me. I have to keep a better hold on myself. I swore I wasn't going to get mad, no matter what you said to me. But… I just got so upset that I was going to lose you… that you couldn't deal with what I am…"

The irony of Julie's words weren't lost on me. I'd had a conversation like this before. A small part of me was laughing inside; another girl who had to control herself around me for my own safety. One girl who could lose control and eat me and another one who could lose control and…What?

"What would happen… if you got too mad?" I asked.

"I'd turn into a wolf," she whispered.

"You don't need a full moon?"

She smirked and rolled her eyes. "Hollywood's version doesn't get much right."

I chuckled darkly. Another conversation I'd had before. I didn't know what to think, how to feel. Julie was searching my face, trying to read my expression. She must not have liked it because she sighed, and was serious again. "You don't need to be so stressed out, Bella. We're going to take care of this. And we're keeping a special eye on Charlie and the others—we won't let anything happen to him. Trust me on that."

Something very, very obvious, something I should have grasped at once—but I'd been so distracted by the idea of Julie and her friends fighting with Laurent, with the déjà vu of the situation, that I'd completely missed it at the time—occurred to me only then, when Julie used present tesnse again.

We're going to take care of this.

"Laurent is dead," I said the words and my entire body went ice cold.

"Bella?" Julie asked anxiously, touching my ashen cheek.

"If Laurent died… a week ago… then someone else is killing people now."

Julie nodded; her teeth clenched together, and she spoke through them. "There were two of them. They kept meeting up and figured they must have been mates. We thought the mate would want to fight us—in our stories, they usually get pretty pissed off if you kill their mate—but she just keeps running away, and then coming back again. If we could figure out what she was after, it would be easier to take her down. But she makes no sense. She keeps dancing around the edges, like she's testing our defenses, looking for a way in—but in where? Where does she want to go? Sam thinks she's trying to separate us, so she'll have a better chance…."

Her voice faded until it sounded like it was coming through a long tunnel; I couldn't make out the individual words anymore. My forehead dewed with sweat and my stomach rolled like I had the stomach flu again. Exactly like I had the flu.

I turned away form her quickly, and leaned over the tree trunk. My body convulsed with useless heaves, my empty stomach contracting with horrified nausea, though there was nothing in it to expel.

Victoria was here. Looking for me. Killing strangers in the woods. The woods where Charlie was searching…

My head spun sickeningly.

Julie's hands caught my shoulders—kept me from sliding forward onto the rocks. I could feel her hot breath on my cheek. "Bella! What's wrong?"

"Victoria," I gasped as soon as I could catch my breath around the nauseous spasms.

A flood of memories came rushing back and I shivered involuntarily. I felt weak and dizzy with panick. My breathing becoming erratic.

I felt Julie pull me up from my slump. She draped me across her lap, laying my limp head against her shoulder. She held me tightly, brushing my hair from my forhead.

"Who?" Julie asked. "Can you hear me, Bella? Bella?"

I tried to concentrate on Julie's breathing, tried to force my own spastic breathing to match hers.

"She wasn't Laurent's mate," I shuddered into her shoulder. "They were just old friends…."

"Do you need some water? A doctor? Tell me what to do," she demanded, frantic.

"I'm not sick—I'm scared," I explained in a whisper. The word scared didn't really seem to cover it.

Julie rubbed my back. "Scared of Victoria?"

I nodded, shuddering.

"Victoria is the red-haired female?"

I trembled again, and tried to breathe deeply, "Yes."

"How do you know she wasn't the black-haired one's mate?"

"Laurent told me James was her mate," I explained, automatically flexing the hand with the scar.

She pulled my face around, holding it steady in her big hand. She stared intently into my eyes. "Did he tell you anything else, Bella? This is important. Do you know what the red-head wants?"

"Of course," I whispered. "She wants me."

Her eyes flipped wide, then narrowed into slits. "Why?" she demanded.

"Edyth killed James," I whispered. Julie held me tighter. "Victoria did get… pissed off. But Laurent said Victoria thought it was fairer to kill me than Edyth. Mate for mate. She didn't know—still doesn't know, I guess—that…" I sighed. "Well, that things aren't like that with us anymore."

Julie was distracted by that, her face torn between several different expressions. "Is that what happened? Why the Cullens left?"

"She lied. Edyth, I mean. It wasn't everything she said she i wasn't everything she said she wanted. I guess I was just a distraction," I explained, shrugging.

Something like a growl—not a real growl, just a human approximation—rumbled in Julie's chest under my ear. "If that idiot bloodsucker is honestly stupid enough—"

"Please," I squeezed Julie's muscular forearm. "Jules, don't."

Julie hesitated, then nodded once.

"This is important," she said again, her face all business now. "This is exactly what we needed to know. We've got to tell the others right away."

She stood, pulling me to my feet. She kept two hands on my waist until she was sure I wasn't going to fall.

My breathing had become more regular. "I'm okay."

She traded her hold on my waist for one of my hands. "Let's go."

She pulled me back toward the truck.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"I'm not sure yet," she admitted. "I'll call a meeting. Hey, wait here for just a minute, okay?" She leaned me against the side of the truck and released my hand.

"Where are you going?"

"I'll be right back," she promised. Then she turned and sprinted through the parking lot, across the road, and into the bordering forest. She flitted into the trees, swift and sleek as a deer.

"Julie!' I called after her, but she was already gone.

It was not a good time to be left alone. Seconds after Julie was out of my sight, I was starting to hyperventilate again. I forced myself to stay focus and climbed into the cab of the truck. I mashed the locks down at once. It didn't make me feel any better.

Victoria was already hunting me. It was just luck that she hadn't found me yet—just luck and five teenage werewolves. I had to laugh, darkly, even then. Still, no matter what Julie said, the thought of her coming anywhere close to Victoria was horrifying. I didn't care what she could turn into. I could see Victoria in my head, her face wild, her hair like flames, deadly, indestructible….

But, according to Julie, Laurent was gone. Was that really possible? Edyth had told me how difficult it was to kill a vampire. Only another vampire could do the job. Yet Julie said this was what werewolves were made for…

She said they were keeping a special eye on Charlie—that I should trust the werewolves to keep my father safe. How could I trust that? None of us were safe! Julie the very least of all, if she was trying to put herself between Victoria and Charlie… between Victoria and me.

I felt like I was about to hyperventilate again. I desperately scanned the tree-line looking for Julie. After what felt like ages, but was probably only a few minutes, she reappeared among the trees. She was walking like she had just put her shoes on, trying to get them to fit right, and tugging up the waistband of her cut-off sweats.

By the time she got to the truck and climbed in, the expression on my face must have alerted her to my current emotions.

"You're really scared, aren't you?" She frowned.

I nodded.

"Don't be. We'll take care of you—and Charlie, too. I promise."

"It's not just that, Jules. The idea of you finding Victoria… Of you being in danger," I trailed off.

She laughed. "You've got to have a little more confidence in us than that. It's insulting."

I shook my head. "I've seen too many vampires in action, Julie."

She clenched her jaw and remained silent. I decided to change the subject.

"Where did you go just now?" I asked.

Her jaw clenched harder.

"What? Is it a secret?"

She frowned. "Not really. It's kind of weird, though. I don't want to freak you out."

"I don't know if you've noticed, but I'm sort of used to werid by this point." I managed to smile.

Julie grinned back easily. "Guess you'd have to be. Okay. See, when we're wolves, we can… hear each other."

I raised a confused eyebrow.

"Not hear sounds," she went on, "but we can hear…thoughts—each other's anyway—no matter how far away from each other we are. It really helps when we hunt, but it's a big pain otherwise. It's embarrassing—having no secrets like that. Freaky, eh?"

"Is that what you meant last night, when you said you would tell them you'd seen me, even though you didn't want to?"

"You're quick."

"I try."

"You're also very good with weird. I thought that would bother you."

"It's not… well, you're not the first person I've known who could do that. So it doesn't seem weird to me."

"Really?... Wait—are you talking about your bloodsuckers?"

"I wish you wouldn't call them that."

She laughed. "Okay. The Cullens, then?"

"Just Edyth." I sighed.

Julie looked surprised—unpleasantly so. "I thought those were just stories. I've heard legends about vampires who could do… extra stuff, but I thought that was just a myth."

"Is anything just a myth anymore?" I asked her wryly.

She scowled. "Guess not. Okay, we're going to meet Sam and the others at the place where we go to ride our bikes."

I started the truck and headed back up the road.

"So did you just turn into a wolf now, to talk to Sam?" I asked, curious.

Julie nodded, seeming embarrassed. "I kept it real short—I tried not to think about you so they wouldn't know what was going on. I was afraid Sam would tell me I couldn't bring you."

"That wouldn't have stopped me." I couldn't get rid of my perception of Sam as the bad guy. My teeth clenched together whenever I heard his name.

"Well, it would have stopped me," Julie said, morose now. "Remember how I couldn't finish my sentences last night? How I couldn't just tell you the whole story?"

"Yeah. You looked like you were choking on something."

She chuckled darkly. "Close enough. Sam told me I couldn't tell you. He's… the head of the pack, you know. He's the Alpha. When he tells us to do something, or not to do something—when he really means it, well, we can't just ignore him."

"Weird," I muttered.

"Very," she agreed. "It's kind of a wolf thing."

"What do werewolves have against free-will?"

Julie laughed at that. "There's a load of stuff like that—wolf things. I'm still learning. I can't imagine what it was like for Sam, trying to deal with it alone. It sucks bad enough to go through it with a whole pack for support."

"Sam was alone?"

"Yeah." Julie's voice lowered. "When I… changed, it was the most…horrible, the most terrifying thing I've ever been through—worse than anything I could have imagined. But I wasn't alone—there were the voices there, in my head, telling me what had happened and what I had to do. That kept me from losing my mind, I think. But Sam…" She shook her head. "Sam had no help."

This was going to take some adjusting. When Julie explained it like that, it was hard not to feel compassion for Sam. I had to reminding myself that there was no reason to hate him anymore.

"Will they be angry that I'm with you?" I asked.

She made a face. "Probably."

"Maybe I shouldn't—"

"No, it's okay," she assured me. "You know a ton of things that can help us. It's not like you're just some ignorant human. You're like a… I don't know, spy or something. You've been behind enemy lines."

I frowned to myself. Was that what Julie would want from me? Insider information to help them destroy their enemies? I wasn't a a spy, I wasn't something to be used. Again.

But I wanted her to stop Victoria, didn't I?

No.

I did want Victoria to be stopped, preferably before she tortured me to death or ran into Charlie or killed another stranger. I just didn't want Julie to be the one to stop her, or rather to try. I didn't want Julie within a hundred miles of her.

"Like the stuff about the mind-reading bloodsucker," she continued, oblivious to my reverie. "That's the kind of thing we need to know about. That really sucks that those stories are true. It makes everything more complicated. Hey, do you think this Victoria can do anything special?"

"I don't think so," I thought about it, and then sighed. "She would have mentioned it."

"She? Oh, you mean Edyth—oops, sorry. I forgot. You don't like to talk about her."

"Not really, no." I admitted.

"Sorry."

"How do you know me so well, Jules? Sometimes it's like you can read my mind."

"Naw. I just pay attention."

Was it really that simple? Somehow, in the time we had spent together, I had almost felt like Julie knew me better than Edyth ever had. Edyth had asked question after question, trying to learn every minute detail about me. Julie didn't probe, she didn't question. She just observed. She just knew me.

We had reached the little dirt road where Julie had first taught me to ride the motorcycle.

"This good?" I asked.

"Sure, sure."

I pulled over and cut the engine.

"You're still unhappy, aren't you?" she murmured.

I thought about it, and nodded. "I suppose."

"Did you ever think… that maybe… you're better off?"

I inhaled slowly, and then let my breath out. "Maybe."

"Cause she wasn't the best—" Julie cut herself off. She shifted slightly in her seat.

"Maybe she wasn't." I offered. "I don't know. It's… It's just hard."

"Okay." She took a deep breath. "I'm sorry I said anything."

"Don't feel bad. Normally I don't think I would mind as much finally talking about it. Just letting it all out and really talking about it." I looked over at her. "But I just don't know if I can."

Her eyes met mine and she nodded. "I understand. I had a hard time keeping a secret from you for two weeks. It must be hell to not be able to talk toanyone."

"Hell," I agreed.

Julie sucked in a sharp breath. "They're here. Let's go."

"Are you sure?" I asked while she popped her door open. "Maybe I shouldn't be here."

"They'll deal with it," she said, and then she grinned. "Who's afraid of the big, bad wolf?"

"Oh, god," I rolled my eyes at her. I got out of the truck, hurrying around to the front end to stand close beside Julie. I remembered only too clearly the giant monsters in the meadow. My hands were trembling like Julie's had been before, but with fear rather than rage. I reached for Julie's hand and held it tightly.

She gently squeezed my hand back. "Here we go.