AN: Listen to Bittersweet by Within Temptation for this one!
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It had taken centuries for Merlin to finally come to terms with Arthur's death. He always wondered if he had told Arthur earlier, than maybe things would have ended better. Maybe Arthur would have accepted him and freed magic.
Merlin could have stopped Mordred years ago, but he had not been able to bring himself to do it. But his hesitance to be nice or just end the druid had led to the boy turning to Morgana. Merlin had blamed himself for over a millennia.
The Once and Future King was dead and the blame fell on Morgana and Mordred. But Merlin knew better. He had been the reason the two of them had turned to the darkness. Merlin knew it was his fault that half of his soul was gone.
It was only the promise of Arthur's return that kept Merlin going after his friends in Camelot grew old and died. Merlin kept Arthur's memory alive and he waited. He would wait forever if he needed to. Because Arthur was worth the wait.