Chapter 10

"Blah" Japanese

"Blah" English

I hate it. I hate this feeling. This emptiness. The fuck Mama. The fuck Papa. Naruto. Hana. Mother, not mother, father not father. This isn't fucking right.

It's just not.

I was. I…I… How could I forget? How could I remember? I'm Nyakao. But not. I'm Aiya. But not.

My chest hurts. My tears have run dry long ago. Lee had freaked out the moment I started crying but I just latched on to him like a teddy bear and cried.

Memories tons and tons of memories spilled into my brain. This compound was our home. My home. The symbols on the door was our clan. The Uzumaki clan. Holy shit, I'm a Uzumaki. I'm a Namikage. The symbols on my arms. Mama's writing.

To protect you, to make you stronger.

They were always on my arms, hiding in plain sight. I'm a seals mistress. I'm the little flash. I'm. I'm fucking hell. My brain hurts.

I'm a prodigy.

Fuck. Shit. Damnit. Rice Balls. Every damn fucking god Shinigami out there fuck you. Mama. Papa.

Kushina. Minito.

Mama. Papa.

Kushina. Minito.

Dead.

Gone.

Stupid.

Crying. I can't breathe. Naruto's crying, Hana's screaming I don't care. My sun and moon. My anchors. Gone.

Fucking Madara!

"Nyakao! Liston!" Mama said slapping my head with a rolled up piece of paper from our seals stack. "You need to pay attention."

"But Mama, there the exact same!" I wined rubbing my head with a pout. She sniffed at me and rolled her eyes. "No seals ever the same, not even copies." She lectured, pointing to the sign for protection on the seal. "Ya know, this means protection, and this one means life, so if you look at them just correctly-"

"This one blocks with the life of the chakra in that one!" I finished for her proudly.

"Correct!" She cheered.

"Little flash," Papa said bending down to my panting form. "Don't give up, it's hard but you know if your enemy can't touch you-"

"You can out run them." I replied smiling up at him. "And they won't know what hit them." Papa and I finished the sentence together.

So many moments. I remember. Sniffling I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, then another, and another till finally I was calm. Not okay. Not happy. I was heartbroken. But I needed to get up.

There was things I needed to do.

Coming back to reality, I found myself still clutching Lee as a life line. He was still holding Naruto and Hana strapped to his chest as I had balled all over them. Naruto. Hana. My babies. My siblings. My imoto and ototo.

Holy fuck.

I stared at the children. I must have scared them with my outburst. They had tear streaks down there eyes but like me too, the tears had ebbed to a slow trickle. Oh my darlings. I'm so sorry.

"Sorry." I whispered rubbing my head into Lee's chest. His hand that was petting my head stopped in motion.

"It's okay Aiya-san. I-I don't know what's going on but… I'm here...If you need me." He finished his neck turning a shade of red as if he was embarrassed.

I snorted. Fuck, here I am having a mental break down and Rock Freaking Lee, Little Green Beast-ling in the making was consoling me. God I must seem like the most mental unstable person of Kohana. Oh wait no that one goes to Sakura. That girl's all kind of Crazy.

I giggled. This was insane.

Ugg my brain hurts.

"I can't really explain it." I said lifting my siblings into my arms. I really need to hold them right now. "It's just a, really long story, Lee. Thanks by the way. I'm sorry I cried all over your shirt."

Meeting Lee's eyes showed confusion, curiosity, embarrassment and a hint of sympathy. Well there went first impressions. "It's okay. I got other shirts." He replied rubbing his arms. Oops must have made them fall asleep. Looking up at me, I was only a bit taller them him, he met my gaze smiling softly. "I've got, time. If you want to talk about it."

I hugged the kids to my chest. Everything felt still so raw. But I was raised better. They raised me better. "Yeah…Come on inside then. This…is home." I replied softly.

Home. I haven't said those words in a long time. It was a simple word but filled my heart with hope and sadness like a drop of clenching water. I hugged my siblings tighter to my chest. My siblings. Tears welled up in my eyes but I didn't let them spill this time.

This was so messed up. I remember the first years of my life in the shinobi world but I remember more. I remember I had another life. That this world didn't exist. I. I don't know how it was possible. Did the original Nyakao die in that house? Did Hana die too? Did our wayward souls stop the emanate future from happing?

And what about Mama. Papa, just thinking of them made my throat clench up. It felt like a weight on my heart had been lifted only for a greater mass to replace it.

I didn't know what to do now. Today started like any other day. Yeah I hated being cooped up by the Anbu but they were protecting us.

I realized I had been foolish. Mama and Papa would have hit me over the head if they could have seen how I have been acting.

My only regret is I fucking did all that hard work for learning kanji again for nothing. Just my luck.

What am I doing? What should I do? There was no way now that I was going to let the Hokege, the villagers or any fucking one else separate my brother and sister from me now. And I can't live in that house under lockdown again. Especially when the safest place for us was the compound.

The compound. Home. Mama and Papa's house. It was originally the old Uzumaki compound. The seals around the property were as old as the Senju's tree's. We actually had a bunch scattered on our property, practically a whole forest of old ass trees the second Hokage left to the village.

The seals around the property were like wards from fairytales. There was one huge seal that coverage the whole property underneath the earth that reached to the nearest corners of our area. The place was about seven football fields wide and nine big. It was literally huge. I had grown up here and even I didn't know exactly the full dimensions of it. We had in addition to the huge seal that created an almost dome like protection around us, there were hundreds of small little seals at the edge of the property to ward off anyone not of Uzumaki blood. And even then you had to be keyed into the other thousand seals that protected the property from the unseen eye to even see the houses. How Mama had even found the place I would never know. But with all the protections not only to keep people out and protect the houses, forest, farms, and rivers this place could have survived Kohana being completely annihilated with a massive bomb and still stand without out a scratch on it.

And plus it was Home. My home. Mama and Papa had the house in the village that I had sometimes visited but this was my house.

I lived in this place. I was born here.

The main house was close to what I would call mansion size. It was traditional in Japanese style and had over eight bedrooms. To me that was a lot.

We didn't live there but instead had lived in the branch house at the front of the compound, much smaller with only five main bedrooms. It was quaint and very much like Tradition Japanese's homes except for the bright orange shutters Mama had painted only a few months after she found out she was pregnant with me.

She said when she found out she was pregnant it was like the sun had come for the first time in her life.

Oh god just breathe Aiya.

The ground around my home had grown slightly with weeds as it had been nearly a year since I was last here. I wonder if our herb garden was doing okay. I absently thought. The path was slightly covered in leaves and our front door was still ajar from where I had rushed out chasing after Mama when-.

Oh god breathe.

A tear slid down my cheek as Lee and I ascended the steps to the front door. Breathe. The memories stuttered as reality became prominent. Pushing open the front door showed the front hallway Papa's shippers still sitting on the rug. It was dark and foreboding almost as if the light this place once possessed had be sucked from it.

Breathe.

"Aiya-san?" Lee's voice spoke up from behind me. I jarred slightly and looked back at him. He was needing his lip as he continued. "Are you okay…?" He asked.

I must had been staring for the past several minutes. "Yeah." My voice waivered. "It's just been a long time since I've been…Here." I replied.

Lee nodded and placed his hand on my shoulder squeezing slightly. Bless Him. Lee after everything he was no older than I was but he understood. And I was just some random girl with mental problems who saved him a few hours ago. Hours? If felt like days.

We continued into the house my feet fallowing the familiar pattern till we reached and archway opening up into the Kitchen. Mama singing softly, the smell of burnt cookies entering my senses, yellow cabinets with little and big hand prints, a scroll on the table where Papa would be going over, while I sat playing with my newly painted seals making them light up bright blue.

I blinked and the kitchen was dark and empty again. Flickering on the lights revealed the same kitchen but without the prominent characters that made the space bright and happy.

Breathe Aiya.

I needed to get over myself. I needed a plan. Looking at this place hurts. So fucking much that It felt like someone was ripping out my heart every time I took a step but I would not let it stop me. They raised me better.

Taking a deep breath I entered the kitchen. "So, Lee would you like some tea?"

He grinned and nodded his head sitting down in the dining room table's chair. I pulled out the high chairs from behind our cabinet and set Naruto in one of them next to Lee and Hana in the other next to the seat I planned to occupy.

It was almost like I never left for only a second. Preparing the tea was natural I got the stool from under the sink just like I used to for Papa and climbed up on the counter to get to the tea bags in the top cabinet. And just like I used to I picked up the kettle next to the stove rinsed it off and set the water to steamer.

For fucks sake I need to get a grip.

After preparing our tea, gray mint with jasmine leaves, Papa's favorite, I sat down next to Lee with a heavy sigh.

"Thanks Aiya-san." Lee smiled then grabbed his cup of tea. He drank the beverage like an old man making many heavy groans and sighs while pretending like he had the hugest burned just roll off his shoulders.

I snorted. Lee grumbled and harrumphed. "Now tell me child what ails your poor heart." He said in the deepest voice he could muster. Which sounded like a grown man choking on a chicken wing.

I snorted again rolling my eyes. He was trying to cheer me up. The devil. He wiggled his eye brows. I lost it.

Laughing behind my cup I kicked foot out to make him stop. Freaking dork.

"Aha so you do smile-OW" He yelped as my foot made connection with his knee. "Ow, ow ow! Aiya-san!" He grumbled rubbing his knee while trying not the spill his cup.

"You dork." I smirked at him. He beamed at me in return.

Taking a sip of tea I thought about how to explain the situation to him. It wasn't really a situation but I still didn't know how to start I mean, I might have known Lee from the manga but I didn't know much about this Lee.

One he sucked at fighting it was almost tragic. Two He could make me want to smile the smallest twitch of his eyebrows the fuzzy caterpillars making me want to just giggle every time I saw them. Three, he was far too trusting after only a brief introduction. Four he had scars I think as deep as I had. Five He reminded me of what Naruto could turn out to be like if I didn't stop it. Five, He was a dork and crazy enough to be nice to me.

I kind of liked him. In an omg they actually move on his face! Sort of way. Yeah. I sighed. But I was fucked up. Like majorly fucked up. I was a prodigious little girl with most of the future shoved into her head. I felt like I split between two realities one being Aiya, the other Nyakao. And I felt so fucking old and sad, and annoyed and desperate and for fucks sake.

I sighed again. Looking into my refection in the green waters I looked up and met Lee's eyes. He smiled at me kindly patiently waiting for me to start

So I talked.

I talked about my mother and father and life before I woke up in the house a year ago. I left out there names but told him I was the product of two clans. Told him how I was always about to pick up things fairly quickly and started my training by the time I was two years old. I told him my parents kept me secret because men where after me if they knew I was prodigious. I told him about my life, learning things, when Mama started expecting Naruto and Hana. How I was hidden in a safe house the night of the attack. Choking on my words I explained how I woke up after losing my memories. I was silently crying by this time. I told him about the hospital. About nurse one and about finding Naruto even though I hadn't the slightest idea we were actually family just that I needed to help protect him. I told him of the villager's glares, and the caretaker's abandonment. I told him about the Hokege and how he tried to take Naruto from me.

I told him about the Anbu the constant prison meant inside the village. I told him about everything I did to better myself and watch after my siblings.

By the end of the tale I had dried out all my tears, Naruto and Hana had been moved down to the floor with a blanket to rest since they fell asleep and Lee was sitting there all the while, a tiny little frown formed on his face as he looked to be contemplating something.

When I was done Lee started on his story.

How he lived before the Kyuubi's attack. How his mother was a Civilian and his father was a Ninja. How his father had joined the Frontal Guard of the village while his mother worked in a pharmacy they had owned. How his parents had done everything they could to teach him in life, how his father would spar with him, and his mother would dote on him. He told me that when the attacked happened he and his mother didn't have time to make it across the village to the caves for safety before the demon had crushed his house.

How he found out a week later his father died. And he ended up at the orphanage just like I did.

He told me how he hated being in the orphanage and how Tetsu would beat him up every day just because he had huge eyebrows and how none of the caretakers would protect him or stop the bullying. Lee smiled softly after that and continued to tell me how he met his roommate and became a sibling to two orphan twins just like I did. He told me of his plan to get them out of the orphanage when he became a shinobi so he could protect his precious people and his dream of being a great ninja just like his father was.

I was pretty choked up by the time he came to the end of his story. Lee and I were a lot alike. We didn't take what the world gave us for an answer and kept moving trying to save as many innocents as we could in the process. I realized Lee was fairly mature for his age too. He was like me in that way as well, with wisdom beyond his years.

I wondered if the Manga Lee was like this Lee in real life. Smiling but secretly holding pain on the inside.

We were silent after a long while.

"Neh? Aiya-san you know what?" Lee said breaking the silence. "Our lives are super complicated aren't they?" He said laying his head on his crossed arms.

I nodded. "Complicated is the understatement of the century Lee." I replied staring down at my peacefully sleeping siblings.

"Hay, you think you could teach me to punch like you do?" Lee asked brown eyes meeting mine as he look up at me.

"Sure, on one condition." I replied holding my chin. "You do everything I say and I'll teach you how to kick that Tetsu kid's ass halfway across Kohana and back."

Lee grinned and held out his hand for me to shake. "You got a deal, Aiya-san."

A/N: Okay I know its been a few months sorry fans and friends. I've been going through some things. I think this chapter kind of reflects me right now a bit too. I got into a big car accident last month and it kinda sent life on a rollar coaster. I do plan on at least trying to get a chapter out once a month though. So cross your fringers readers I'm actually going to try to committ to something now. Still no like pressure huh?

Thank you for your continued support readers and fallowers

Aiyaki