Letters from a Lost Love
Chapter 10: Sacrificial Miracles, Part One
Two weeks later…
"Please don't stop. I need your hands everywhere."
"Are you sure?"
"I'm sure. Please, Neri, make love to me."
"Ariella? Sweetheart, wake up. Wake up."
Ariella's eyes flashed open to see Michael staring at her in concern.
"Was I talking in my sleep?" she asked worriedly.
Her husband shook his head.
"No, but you were tossing and turning. And moaning. Are you all right?"
"I'm fine."
"Were you having a nightmare?"
"No, it was actually a pretty good dream."
Michael raised an eyebrow.
"Was it about me?"
"I can't answer that."
"Was it about Neri?"
Ariella looked away, tears running down her face.
"Why are you crying, darling? I'm not mad at you. I told you if you changed your mind it would be okay with me."
"It shouldn't. I feel terrible for even thinking…"
"Shh. It's all right. This is a different situation, I'll admit, but you and I are fine. Always. Do you want to go to him? Would that make you feel better?"
"How are you okay with this?"
"Because I trust the two of you. I love you, Ariella, and I want you to be happy. I'll do anything to ensure your happiness. If being with Neri makes you happy, then I'm fine with it. I know neither of you would betray me."
"Never."
Ariella pulled her husband to her, kissing him fiercely.
"I love you. So much."
Michael's hands wrapped around her.
"I love you too. You're the most beautiful and amazing woman I've ever known, and I'm proud to be your husband. Go. It's all right. Or I can have him come here."
"I think that would be best. I'm sorry for waking you."
"Don't worry about it. I'll sleep downstairs."
Michael squeezed his wife's hand, then went to find Neri.
He found his bodyguard patrolling the grounds.
"Neri."
Neri looked up to see Michael coming towards him, and met him halfway.
"Did you need something?"
Michael smirked at him.
"I'm not the one who needs you."
He had the satisfaction of seeing Neri's eyes light up, and hid a smile.
"Ariella wants me?"
"Yes. Go to her."
"Are you sure? Will you be all right?"
Michael placed his hand on his friend's shoulder.
"As long as you and Ariella are all right and happy, I'll be fine."
"Okay. And Michael?"
"Yes?"
"Thank you."
"You're welcome. If you ever need anything from me, Neri, don't hesitate to ask."
"Okay."
"I'm heading back to bed. I'll see you in the morning."
"I don't want to leave you on your own though."
"I'll be all right, I promise."
"Good."
Neri went to see Ariella, and Michael was walking through the hall to the study when a voice stopped him.
"Michael."
He turned to find Connie standing there, her eyes heavy with sleep.
"Connie, are you all right? I thought you were sleeping."
"I was. I came to make sure you were okay. I heard voices."
"I'm sorry if I woke you. Go back to sleep. Everything's all right."
"What's going on? Why are you down here?"
"It's Neri and Ariella."
"Oh, I see. You were kicked out."
Michael chuckled.
"Nothing quite so drastic. I'm just giving them space."
"By sleeping in your study?"
"You're quite perceptive, you know that?"
"I learned from watching you."
"I'm flattered."
Connie reached for her brother, tucking his arm in hers.
"You're not sleeping in your study. You're sleeping in my bed."
"Connie…"
"No arguing. You're my brother, and you're sleeping in my bed."
"Well, you've certainly made me an offer I can't refuse."
"Good."
"You'd make one terrifying Don."
"Glad you think so."
"I know so. I know you, Connie. You're much stronger than people give you credit for. I always knew you had it in you."
"Thank you."
When they arrived at Connie's room, Michael stopped her.
"I'm proud of you. I'm proud of the woman you're becoming. I love you. Never doubt that."
"I don't."
"You have absolutely nothing to fear from me. Ever. I'll never hurt you."
"I know you wouldn't. But why did you say that?"
"What?"
"Why did you say I have nothing to fear from you? Should I be afraid of you?"
Damn his sister's uncanny perception.
"No," Michael replied. "Not at all."
Connie's senses were tingling. She wanted to ask, but she felt tonight wasn't the night.
But Michael saw through her.
"If there's something on your mind, ask away."
Connie opened the door and the two of them walked in, Michael going to sit on the edge of his sister's bed.
Connie sat beside him.
"Tell me the truth, Michael. Are you hiding something from me?"
She watched her brother's face closely, noting the range of expressions on his face shift quickly. She also saw the mask go up, the one he used to hide his true feelings.
But she stared deeply into his eyes, knowing she could find all the answers she sought there.
To someone who didn't know Michael well, it might have seemed as though he was completely calm. But Connie knew better. She detected enormous guilt and sadness in those dark brown eyes.
Something was eating at her brother, and she was determined to find out what.
Michael allowed Connie to search him, realizing he couldn't hide the truth from her any longer.
"Yes, Connie. I am," he answered finally.
"Whatever it is, I won't hate you or judge you."
"You say that now."
"Just tell me. Please."
Michael sighed, running his hands through his hair.
"The truth is…Fredo didn't drown. I killed him."
Connie stared at her brother in shock.
"You killed Fredo? When? Was it after I got Anthony out of the boat the day he went fishing?"
"Yes. Neri shot Fredo in the back of his head. I watched him do it. I watched Fredo's body fall. I ordered Fredo's death, Connie. I'm a. monster. I know I am. But you have to understand, Fredo tried to have me killed. Hyman Roth manipulated him, and Fredo fell for it. He knew Johnny Ola, he knew everything. Fredo was the one who told Roth's men where my room was, who opened the windows so they could have a clear view of me and Kay the night they tried to assassinate me."
Connie watched in amazement as Michael began to cry.
"I killed my own brother! What is wrong with me? How could I have been so foolish?"
Connie pulled Michael to her, but he wrestled out of her grip.
"No, Connie. I don't want to hurt you too. Please just let me be."
"No. I won't do that. I can't do that. I'm not happy that you killed Fredo, even after I begged you to forgive him, but I'm not leaving you. Not for a second. You were going to kill him regardless of what anyone said, weren't you?"
"Yes. I'm sorry. I felt I had no other choice."
"You always have another choice, Michael. Life is full of choices. But I understand. You didn't want to seem weak to the other families, and Fredo was too much of a liability to keep alive. But he's still your brother. And you're still mine."
Connie leaned back in the bed so she was against the pillows and pulled her brother to her, laying his head in her lap.
"Rest, Michael. Don't think about it anymore. Think about Ariella, and the life you're bringing into the world. You did what you had to do, and it's hard, but it's okay. I still love you, and I'm sure Fredo still loves you."
"How can you be so sure?"
"Because Fredo was always a loving soul. He had a good heart, but he was too easily manipulated. But enough talk. Sleep."
Connie kissed her brother's forehead.
"I love you, Michael, and I don't have you for what you felt you had to do."
She watched her brother's eyes closed, and carded her fingers through his hair.
She watched the tension on his face ease until his breathing evened out.
Once she was sure he wouldn't wake, she shifted slightly so he was lying on the bed. She tucked him in and walked quietly to the other side of the bed, getting in and pulling the covers up around her.
While the siblings slept, shadows moved around them.
Fredo's spirit appeared in the room briefly, his eyes on Michael's unconscious form.
He was at his brother's side in an instant.
"Hey, Mikey. It's me, Fredo. Heaven is great. It's like a million parties rolled into one all the time. Anyway, I just came to say that Connie's right. I don't have you, and I'm sorry I tried to have you killed. I should never have worked for Roth or listened to Ola, and I'm sorry I betrayed you. I love you, and I should have respected you and your place in the family. I hope on day you can forgive me, and I hope you can forgive yourself. Oh, and Pop and Mama say hi. And Sonny. He say he can't wait to see your kids. Yeah, Ariella's having twins. Surprise. And one more thing…"
Fredo placed his hand on Michael's heart.
"I can't make you completely at peace, but I can do this."
Light shot out of Fredo's hands and hovered over Michael's heart, entering him.
"This is my way of forgiving you, though there's nothing to forgive. You did what you felt was right. I have to go now. I'll be back soon. I love you."
With that, Fredo disappeared.
Michael opened his eyes briefly, seeing a shadow disappear, then fell back asleep.
Upstairs, Ariella was kissing Neri passionately, her hands twining around his neck.
"I'm sorry we can't do more."
Neri shook his head.
"It's fine, Ariella. You're so beautiful. I never dreamed…"
"And I dreamed too much. Every night for the past two weeks. All I could think of was you."
"I still can't believe this is happening. I can't believe Michael agreed to this. I'm still afraid it'll turn out to be a trap."
"It's not, trust me. Michael gave me his word that he would do his best never to lie to me, and I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt."
"That doesn't mean we should take full advantage of his generosity, though."
"I completely agree. We can't, anyway."
"Ariella, I know for a fact that you are always beautiful to Michael, regardless of how you look. And maybe especially now. You're the only woman strong enough to carry his child. You want to be with him, and believe me, he appreciates it. I can't tell you how many times I heard Kay complain about this lifestyle and her pregnancies, and yet, she had no problem with all the profits her husband brought in. But you, Ariella, are one of a kind. No one could ever say you're with Michael for his money. You love him so deeply, regardless of his mistakes. That's one of the things I admire about you."
"Thank you, Al. That's very sweet of you to say."
"I don't say things I don't mean," Neri replied, kissing Ariella's neck.
"Mmm…I'm a little sore there," Ariella murmured.
"Would you like me to help with that?"
"If you like."
Neri gently pulled Ariella into his lap, massaging her neck and shoulders the same way he had done for Michael.
Except unlike that time, Neri was struggling to keep himself under control.
He wanted this woman, he was sure of it. And not just physically. He wanted her for her brilliant mind, her loving heart, all of it. He needed he in a way he'd never needed any woman before.
Neri had spent most of his years with Michael watching people, getting to know them inside and out. They always ended up revealing more about who they are than they themselves probably even realized.
From the minute he met her, he realized Ariella McGyver was more like Michael Corleone than anyone he'd ever known. Their personalities were so similar, it was like they were one person. It was no wonder they fought so much as they grew older and closer. The stubbornness, the unwillingness to see anything that didn't further their goal, the way they could see into people's hearts, everything that made them who they are, Neri both admired and feared them for it, Ariella a little more than Michael.
And yet, Ariella might have been one of the few women on Earth who could understand Michael better than anyone, apart from his mother.
Neri's hands moved over Ariella's shoulders, stilling for a moment.
"Can I go further?" he asked quietly.
Ariella turned to look at him, and he was struck by the look in her blue-green eyes. Almost like…she loved him.
But that was impossible.
If prompted, Neri would tell anyone who asked that he was slowly falling in love with this woman. But he wasn't completely sure if she reciprocated.
Without waiting for an answer, Neri scrambled off the bed, pulling on his jacket as quickly as he dared.
"Neri? What's the matter? Did I do something wrong?"
Neri shook his head.
"It's not you, Ariella. It's me. I'm so sorry. I have to go."
Neri walked quickly out of the room and down the stairs, heading outside to the courtyard.
He paced frantically, his heart pounding in his chest.
He had to protect Ariella from herself. She couldn't be in love with him and with Michael. Someone was bound to get hurt, and he'd rather it be him than either one of them.
Neri stopped, thinking about Michael. He would do absolutely anything to keep Michael safe and happy. Michael Corleone had given Neri a purpose, a reason to live, essentially. And Neri wouldn't, couldn't betray him. Not ever.
Footsteps jolted him out of his thoughts.
Neri turned to see Michael staring at him.
"I thought I might find you here," Michael said.
"Why are you awake?"
"My mind wouldn't let me rest. I slept for a few hours, but then I couldn't stop thinking about what I'd done, so I decided to walk around, clear my head. I told Connie about Fredo. She wasn't happy, but she doesn't hate me."
"That's good."
"Aren't you supposed to be with Ariella?"
"Yes."
"What happened?"
"I think I'm in love with her."
That was the safest thing to say. He didn't want Ariella to get into trouble.
"Is that all? When I gave you my permission, Neri, I meant for you to be happy. If you love her, the way I do, then there's no problem. And if she loves you back, isn't that a good thing?"
"But…"
"What's bothering you, AL?"
Michael's voice was so soft and gentle, Neri wanted to tell him everything.
But he couldn't bring himself to admit the truth.
Michael realized Neri was shutting off his emotions, and coaxed, "Tell me. You can tell me anything, anytime."
Neri exhaled sharply.
"I didn't want to believe you had actually given your permission. I thought it was a trap. I thought you would use my feelings against me, to trap me into telling you the truth, and kill me for it.
Neri met Michael's eyes steadily, waiting for judgement.
Michael was hurt by his friend's words.
I guess I've done so much damage to people that my closest allies feel they can't trust me. Like they're all targets, waiting to be killed.
"I haven't been the best leader, I know that. And I'm sorry if I made you feel like anything you did or felt would get you killed. I know how hard it is to go out there and find a woman you can trust to not only love you, but to also keep quiet about the business."
"But that doesn't mean I should have designs on your wife."
"That's not the issue here. You do have feelings for her, probably just as intense as I do, and for me to deny you the chance to explore your feelings after all you've been to me is unfair. You're more important to me than anyone else, not just in terms of business, but also in life. And so is Ariella. And Connie. I don't know what I'd do without the three of you. But you, Al, you've given me so many chances to just be myself, to not worry about anything. I trust you with my life, with my heart. I need you, the same way I need Ariella. And if the two of you want to be together, then so be it. I know Ariella's feelings for you or even love for you won't hurt the love she has for me."
"I…I don't know what to say."
"Don't say anything."
In an uncharacteristic gesture, Michael hugged Neri tightly.
"Thank you."
Neri clung to Michael with a fervor that scared him. The need to be held but this man was overpowering.
Neri could have happily spent days in Michael's arms, gazing into his eyes, being captivated all over again. The same way he could with Ariella.
There was something about the two of them that drove him wild. He couldn't understand it, nor did he want to. But he knew he'd be happy with them forever.
Michael let go of Neri, his eyes becoming clouded with sleep.
"I'm going to talk to Ariella. I have a feeling she might need it. Will you be all right?"
"Yes."
"Well, good night. I'll see you in the morning."
"Good night."
Michael went back inside to see his wife, and Neri stayed outside for a few more minutes before going back inside.
Ariella was puzzled as to what had frightened Neri so much, but she decided not to dwell on it. He'd come around.
She was about to fall asleep when she saw her husband step through the door.
"I thought you were with Connie."
"I was, but I couldn't sleep. Neri told me what happened. Are you in love with him? Because if you are, it's okay."
"I think I am."
"Sorry to grill you so late at night, but I just wanted to make sure the two of you were all right."
"We're fine. Thank you for understanding."
"I'm trying to be more open. I'm glad you see that."
"I do. You look exhausted."
"Is it that obvious?"
"Yes. Sleep, my love."
Michael allowed Ariella to pull him into the bed. She kissed him gently, caressing his face, and giggled as he kissed the inside of her palm over and over again.
"What are you doing?"
"Enjoying you."
"Well, carry on."
"No, I think I'll wait."
"Why?"
"I like teasing you."
"Don't I know that."
Michael leaned against Ariella's chest, listening to her heartbeat.
"I told Connie the truth about Fredo."
"You did? What did she say?"
"She was upset, but she still loves me."
"Of course she does. Are you all right? Now that you've told her."
"I'm glad I told her, but I'm still worried about what'll happen after…"
"Maybe you should make your confession."
Michael sat up to look at his wife.
"I haven't done that in years, Ariella. I don't think I can. I'm not worthy."
"What do you mean, you're not worthy? You are loved, wanted by God. He doesn't want to see you perish. Please, even if you won't do this for yourself, do it for me. Make your confession and forgive yourself. I hate seeing you hurt yourself this way. I love you, and I don't want you to be lost."
"Ariella…"
His wife was crying, tears streaking her face.
Michael moved closer, wiping her tears with his finger.
"Oh, my darling. It's all right. I promise you, if it would make you happy, I'll make my confession."
He kissed her, his hands cupping her face.
"I made a vow to love you till death do us part, and I'm keeping it."
"Not even death will part is, Michael. I can't imagine any life without you. Not ever."
Michael stared at her, his heart overflowing with love for her.
"You love me that much?"
"Of course I do."
"No woman ever cared for me in such a way. I never thought I deserved happiness."
"You deserve all the love and happiness I can give you, and then some. You didn't kill people because you hated them, you killed them because they were trying to kill you."
"And people are still trying to kill me, even after everything."
"I'll protect you with everything I have."
"I know. Thank you for taking a chance on me."
"Thank you for reciprocating. You didn't have to do that."
Michael took her hand in his, entwining their fingers.
"The best decision I ever made was to agree to your proposition. I found so much more than I was looking for."
"So did I."
"I don't know what I'd do without you. I love you, Ariella. I need you always."
"I've always loved you, Michael. No matter what you've done. I'm with you."
Their eyes met, and Michael lifted her hand to his lips, kissing it.
"We belong to each other, sweetheart. That is one thing that will never change."
"I know."
"Sleep well, darling. Sweet dreams."
Ariella gave Michael one of her brilliant smiles, and he felt his heart flutter. This woman never ceases to amaze him.
He snuggled against her and closed his eyes, letting he peace he felt in her arms take him off to dreamland.
Ariella kissed his forehead and was about to follow, when Apollonia appeared to her again.
Hello, Ariella. I'm glad to see you and Michael are doing well.
"What are you doing here?"
I'm here to let you know it's time.
"Time? Time for what?"
For you to complete your task.
"What are you talking about?"
You'll see. Tell me, is there anything you wouldn't do for Michael?
"No, nothing."
You love him.
"Without question."
Good. Keep that. You'll need it.
"Are you threatening him?" Ariella questioned, her hands tightening around her husband.
No, I would never do that. I love him just as much as you do. I'm just warning you.
"Warning me about what?"
The sacrifice you'll have to make for him.
"No sacrifice is too great."
I was hoping that would be your answer. Get some rest. I'll see you soon.
Ariella blinked, coming out of her trance.
She watched her husband sleep, her mind whirling with all that she had heard.
A sacrifice had to be made. She just hopped she was strong enough to make it…
The next day…
Michael couldn't remember the last time the weather had been this bad.
Lightning crackled across the sky, hurricane-like winds beat against the house, shaking the foundation, thunder crashed in a growing crescendo.
He was grateful Kay had taken the children, Anthony and Mary, with her for the weekend. It wouldn't have been safe for them here.
Michael quickly finished the last of his work, then went to make sure his family was all right.
Neri and Connie were boarding up the house.
"Have either of you seen Ariella?"
Connie looked up.
"No, not since breakfast."
"She said she was tired of being cooped up in her room and wanted to go for a walk around the house," Neri supplied.
"Could you look for her? I'll finish up here," Michael suggested.
"Sure, whatever you need."
Neri walked through the house, calling for Ariella, but she was nowhere to be found.
Where could she have gone? She wouldn't have left without saying anything to anyone.
As Neri approached the basement, he felt a coldness suddenly come upon him.
The door was jammed.
Please, don't let her be down here. Please.
Neri used all his strength to open the door, and went downstairs.
"Ariella, Michael is looking for you. Let's…"
Neri stopped abruptly, his eyes widening.
Ariella was lying on the floor, pools of blood congealed around her. Her spine was crushed beneath the weight of the wall, which had crumbled due to the force of the winds outside.
Neri couldn't bring himself to look at her, turning instead to look back up the stairs.
Michael couldn't see his wife like this. It would kill him.
Neri quickly found a sheet, covering Ariella's body as best he could, wiping away his tears as he did so.
She couldn't be dead. Not now. Not after everything.
Neri wanted to sit there and indulge in grief, but he knew he had a bigger task to do.
He went back upstairs, keeping his face blank.
"Where's Ariella?" Michael asked.
Thankfully, Connie wasn't with him.
"She's…she's dead, Michael," Neri replied.
Neri watched Michael go completely still.
"Dead? What are you talking about?"
"I'm not sure what happened, but her spine was crushed. She's gone."
"Her spine was what? How?"
"The wall crumbled. It just…" Neri trailed off.
Michael looked like he was about to collapse.
Neri reached out to steady him, and Michael fell into his arms.
"Not again. I can't do this again," Michael murmured.
Neri rubbed circles on his back.
Michael looked up at his bodyguard, his eyes haunted.
"Do you think she suffered?"
"I hope not. I can't bear the thought of her suffering."
"I can't either."
Neri helped Michael to the sofa.
"I'll make you some tea."
"I want to see her."
Neri was taken aback.
"I don't think that's a good idea. You should remember her as she was."
"I don't care. She's my wife, and she died alone. I want to see her."
"Michael, it's a gruesome sight. She has no face, no spine, nothing. Let me bear this burden, not you. Please."
"She's not really dead, is she? You're making this up because you want her for yourself. That's it, isn't it?"
"No, of course not! Michael, please…"
"Then let me see her."
"I can't…"
Michael stood up quickly, wrapping his hands around Neri's throat and squeezing tightly.
"You don't tell me no. Not ever. I own you, do you understand? I can kill you if I so choose."
"Please don't…"
Michael pushed Neri in front of him and ordered, "Downstairs. Now. Or I will kill you right here."
Woodenly, Neri made his way back downstairs.
Michael went to Ariella, cradling her broken body in his arms.
"I'm here, my love. I'm here. You're not alone anymore. I love you, my darling."
Neri watched silently as tears rolled down Michael's face.
No one could ever doubt Michael's love for his wife.
He spent the rest of the day and most of the night with her, telling her how much he loved her, how much she meant to him.
Neri couldn't bear to watch. It was too painful.
Connie came down around midnight to get Michael to go to bed, but he wouldn't budge.
"I'm not leaving her. She's in a dark place, cold and alone. She needs me."
Connie suspected Michael was either hallucinating or his connection to Ariella was stronger.
So Connie stayed with him as well, pulling her brother closer to her.
It didn't seem real, that Ariella was gone. Yesterday…but Connie couldn't bring herself to think of yesterday.
Ariella had brought so much light and joy into their lives. What would they ever do without her?