So I have about four chapters I want to get posted by next Sunday but I think it's a little too ambitious of me since I only have one free week to get it done. On the other hand, I have no life so what are the alternatives?

I would like to thank my reviewer Richasa for the kind words: Rest assured that even when I said I was discouraged I did not mean that I would be abandoning the story, merely not putting the same amount of energy into it thus resulting in less frequent updates. I'm glad to know there's a reader out there that seems to like what I have so far, so I hope I do not disappoint you!

I'm feeling much better about this story so hopefully this week should be full of updates.

Jaime

As the towers of Ashemark grew visible to Jaime he remembered the last time he had approached this very castle. Not three moons past he was riding towards Ashemark with knowledge of nothing besides the fact that he was there to accompany Addam Marbrand, his friend. Since then he had learned so much about the place he had visited, the people who dwelled in it and himself as well.

It had been a grueling journey, for time refused to pass and every day felt like another week to Jaime. His patience had been tested a number of times, and he could sense the growing reluctance in his men's willingness to approach him on any matter.

He had left King's Landing on surprising terms, it seemed though he offered much help the city and those in it would not be too sad to see him leave. Except perhaps for Tommen. He had wept lightly as he held onto Jaime when he had gone to say good bye privately, telling him of how he wished he could see him soon. Jaime himself hated making a big show of farewells and mostly preferred to leave without a word in order to avoid emotion -but he owed it still to Tommen. Tommen had let him go, and they both knew he wanted to have him there with him. It was not easy, for a sweet king or for any other king. Regardless of Cersei's actions and what she had brought on herself, Tommen did not deserve to know his wife was still a hostage in the Keep and his mother is openly referred to by the Capital as a conspiring adulterer.
He unexpectedly spent his last moments in King's Landing with Randyl Tarly -a man he was not particularly fond of, but someone with enough wits about him for Jaime to award with serious conversations. They did not like each other, but they were the only ones equipped to deal with the situation they were facing. And although Jaime had to tolerate a few disdainful comments from the Lord Tarly, though it was nothing Jaime could not respond to with equal harshness, Jaime did know he was a temporary ally for the dire circumstances. They had finally worked out the last details of the council arrangements and the Tully matter still remained a secret and since Mace Tyrell was not there himself there was no one he could blab to, somehow Jaime trusted Lord Tarly to keep the matter to himself. It was a delicate matter, ideal only if every single step was taken with caution and was executed to perfection. They had planned to silently release Edmure to King's Landing once after his wedding and return to the Rock, and once Lord Crakehall has settled into his position the proposition will be introduced -without much objection if Lord Tarly can keep his word to placate any arguments coming their way. And with those final fine details sorted, Jaime quickly called his men to sort their affairs and made the order to return to Ashemark. He would not even wait for his cousin, Daven Lannister's and Lord Crakehall's arrival, it did not outweigh his need to end the visit that had plagued him so.
He did not see Cersei again, thankfully. A small part of him tormented himself over the fact that she was suffering so, they were in the same castle and yet they could have been leagues away and it couldn't matter. He wondered during his nights in the Red Keep how he could despise her so now when a year ago he would have done anything, killed everyone he could get his hands on, just to be with her. He wondered if he would ever miss her again, even if it only nagged on him slowly the way he was missing Lorraine.

As if sensing that the gates had finally come into view he heard a soft meow come from the box hanging off his saddle. It was a strange kitten he had found, it barely made a sound the entire journey -I suppose that's fitting for Lorraine's pet. She would not leave him alone in King's Landing and would even make her way to his door night after night. He would awake in the morning and leave his chambers almost stumbling on the small mass of ginger waiting for him. After taking it to Tommen the kitten found its way back to him and Tommen had reported that it seemed distressed at being left by Jaime. On regular circumstances a cat as annoying as this one would warrant Jaime to wrap it in a potato sack and throw it out into the bay for all he cared, but he thought Lorraine might appreciate some mercy, and so decided to make the kitten his gift to her. It wasn't much, he was not very good at those kinds of gestures. But he remembered Lorraine whenever he was faced with the kitten and thought that instead of him shooing it away with his foot Lorraine would probably stare him down until he pet it. He hoped she would like it. Moreover, he hoped he did not forget about the darned cat in the box when he finally did get to see his betrothed.

The gates screeched in a welcome, someone really ought to grease those, he thought. As he entered the dry foreground of the entryway the dust created a sort of cloud around him and he could not yet see the figures standing to receive him. Once it had cleared he saw Addam standing there, alone, with an expansive grin on his face and his eyebrows raised. As soon as he unmounted he was approached by Addam, receiving a firm slap on the shoulder in the process.

"My lord, it is good to see you. Not that you've given us much time to miss you."

"I'm flattered at your reception, Ser. You'll forgive me if I was expecting a far prettier Marbrand than you, though." Addam smiled ruefully in return to Jaime's obvious doubtfulness. He turned then and pointed to the large entrance arch to the castle where Jaime's eyes could just make out the outline of a small figure.

"I fear my sister's distaste for the inevitable dust cloud got the better of her. She impatiently awaits you." Understanding dawned on him and he could not help the knowing smirk that made its way to him, so she's been waiting. Before he could step away Addam reaffirmed his previously relaxed hold on Jaime's shoulder.

"Don't forget these. They came for you yesterday from Casterly Rock and I was told to give them to you immediately upon your arrival."

He nodded to Addam in understanding as he accepted the folded letter and made his way to her after reminding himself to quickly grab the "gift box" with him as well. What word would Casterly Rock have to send to me? Deciding to leave that thought for another time, he refocused his attention to the curious reason for his speedy return to Ashemark.

She stood leaning against the entry way, a vision in a gown of bold green with rays of a deep sunken yellow emroidery on her sleeves. Her hair was partially pulled back the way she always wore it and her thick locks curled at the ends past her shoulders. He did not yet know how he felt at seeing her once more -awaiting him, but he commended himself for not running to her. Once he had reached her she straightened herself and extended her hand for him to receive, and Jaime finally registered the smirk she was forcing to keep on her face. He surprised her then by not taking her hand and instead reaching his false hand to her cheek. She stood still, taking in the sudden shift in control as his eyes bore into her and a blank expression replaced her mirthful gaze. It reminded him of that time in the library when they were standing dangerously close and she had taken him by surprise by not allowing him to shy away from her, and now their roles were quite reversed. She looked bashful, suddenly aware that he was standing close to her -this time they were not so alone. With his other hand he dropped the box and instead he reached for the hand that was extended but now was held in awkward disappointment. He brought her hand to his lips and gave her the kiss she knew she expected, his eyes not wavering from hers. With a smile, she finally looked away and brought to his attention a piece of paper prepared in her other hand.

"It's about time." It said, and Jaime smiled knowing she was trying to cover her slight relief with humor.

"I apologise for keeping you waiting, my lady. There was in fact a Kingdom I had to help." She rolled her eyes and he knew he was forgiven. He was not sure if he even needed to be. Just then another complaining meow sounded from the box he had almost forgotten about the box on the floor next to them and Jaime could not help but feel amused at Lorraine's horrified expression. Still not sure whether he'd prefer her horrified expression to a pleasantly surprised one -or disappointed one for that matter, Jaime relented and knelt down to undo the clasp of the box.

The ginger head bobbed out of the leather box, unfamiliar to its surroundings, and Jaime took the kitten in his hands and it attached its claws to his doublet in fear. He resurfaced to face Lorraine who smiled the way she always did around kittens, scrunching up her nose in the process.

"I hope you like your gift, my lady." In sudden excitement Lorraine reached to take the kitten and held it in front of her face to further examine it. Strangely, the kitten had no complaints and seemed at ease in Lorraine's arms. She looked back at him and asked by motioning her hands,

"How did you find it?"

"It was following me around in the Red Keep. I don't know where it came from. I thought you'd tire of chasing cats eventually." She laughed at that and once again held the kitten to her. His heart warmed slightly, regrettably, at the sight of her so enthralled by such a simple gift. Jaime, who had never thought himself someone at all adept -or interested, in silly pursuits and trivial gestures, found a small amount of pride in him for being able to please her so.

"Would you like to name it?" She nodded in response. Turning her attention away from the bundle of fuzzy orange in her arms she looked back at Jaime with a sudden urge to examine him. Firming her mouth to a simple line she reached her free hand to squeeze his upper arm with her head motioning to him to enter the castle. She then awkwardly motioned for him to head to his chambers and rest while she got the kitten settled.

"Getting rid of me already, my lady?" She smiled.

"I'll see you soon."

"I'll come find you." He nodded and she left as Jaime watched her. Silently waiting for her to come back.

Returning his attention to the apparently urgent letter he still held he opened it still standing in the same spot Lorraine had left him, now with people rushing back and forth running errands.

My Lord Lannister,

It was pleasant to hear of you retaking your intended position of Lord of the Rock, and we here at the Rock are only too happy to welcome a Lord as fine as you. And it is with this that I now write to you as you are our Lord and there are some matters that can not be left to anyone else. Casterly Rock has been left to its own devices for far too long now.

We have received word that Lady Roslin Frey, Edmure Tully's wife has given birth to a boy and have made arrangements for her to be returned to her husband here at the Rock. It is favourable for you to return here before her arrival to oversee the arrangements and how exactly we will carry out their comfortable imprisonment -neither I or anyone here at Casterly Rock is accustomed to holding hostages and have no prior experience or knowledge of what exactly it entails. Furthermore, many of surrounding towns and villages are growing restless with disagreements and recent pillagers have left them in an awful state, and you are away no one has the authority to help or do anything about it just yet.

Between you and I, the surrounding Western lords are growing shrewder in their attitudes towards their overlord -you'd think they would have learnt their lessons by now. I implore you, my Lord, to return to Casterly Rock soon so that these issues can be dealt with before it is too late.

Castellan of Casterly Rock,

Ser Damion Lannister.

He sighed as he looked up from the letter. Not a moment's rest, it seems.

Elaine

Elaine looked on as Lorraine continued to coddle the kitten Lord Jaime had given her. She had given it the name "Amber", which was fitting due to its colour. Elaine had no fondness for cats in general but she had to admit that something about this one drew enough to pet it. Perhaps it was the way Lorraine cared for it so carefully, she could feel the affection oozing out of her. Misplaced affection, sister. She thought to herself, maybe you should be that affectionate to your betrothed. But she knew better than to question Lorraine's behaviours. She knew that though she had accepted Lord Jaime willingly this still must all be new to her.

For years, Elaine had worried about her imminent marriage. She had always secretly feared that Reina was sure to marry the best her father could find, and Elaine -being the middle child, would not be handled with too much care in that regard. She worried, as she noted how kind Steffon had been to her sister and how happy he made her, and then seeing how well Margot got on with Addam and even Lorraine had someone good for her. It was extremely improbable that she would be handed to someone as good to her as she wished. The odds were not in her favour. It hindered her happiness and she hated herself for it. But it would be her life, and it would be her life away from home. The only solace was that it was not too far away, and still very close to Lorraine. She had never been to an island before, it excited her a little.

Her attention returned to the kitten that was now exploring the pillow on the floor as Lorraine joined her on the window seats, basking in the breezy air. Elaine wrapped her shawl tighter around her as she studied Lorraine. She seemed at ease, calm. She had been at her wit's end -even if she would never admit it, whilst Lord Jaime was away and there was rarely a time when she was not fidgeting.

"Are you happy Lord Lannister has returned?" She asked knowing the answer. She just needed an excuse to talk. Lorraine nodded slowly, and Elaine continued.

"That's good. When do you think you'll get married?" She shrugged,

"I don't know yet."

"Well, it best happen before i'm due to leave! I have promised to say the vows in your place, it will not do for me to not be there." She said as she leaned over to lightly stroke her sister's cheek. How old we have grown, sister. She mimed back to her,

"We have not really spoken about it."

"Are you afraid to?" Another shrug.

"Lorraine, you can't just agree to marry someone and then show no interest in actually marrying them at all." She rushed to scribble something in response,

"He doesn't seem to be in such a hurry."

"Perhaps he doesn't want to push you, you won't know unless you speak about it." Lorraine crossed her arms further into herself and huffed as she leaned back into her seat. They both looked out to the glorious day swarming the surrounding hills with its sunlight. She wondered if Lorraine's children will have hair drenched in sunlight. Surely, it's too soon for that. She could not really think of Lorraine as a mother just yet. Perhaps this kitten was some kind of test. She snickered out loud trying to imagine Lord Jaime and Lorraine swaddling the little kitten and bottle feeding it. Lorraine looked at her questioningly then,

"I was just thinking of you as a mother." To her surprise, Lorraine did not respond to that. She merely looked away once more and Elaine sensed that it was perhaps too sensitive of an issue to speak of with her, but when has that ever stopped her?

"You...do know...don't you? What is expected of you once you marry Lord Jaime?" Lorraine sighed out loud at that, locking eyes with Elaine -begging for her to speak.

"You'll be his wife, Lorraine. Just like I will be Jason Farman's. You will have...duties to fulfill. And he likes you, he really does Lorraine." She hesitated a moment before carrying on,

"You can't just keep him at arm's length and expect him to be your friend. He asked you to be his family, to make a family with you." Finally, Lorraine took it upon her to respond.

"What if I don't like it? What if it hurts?" She did not immediately respond, for she did not know how. How could she sit there and reassure Lorraine when she herself was worried about the same thing? Reina had little to say about but did not seem to have many complaints either. Janyne on the other hand had been very straightforward with this matter. She had told them how it hurts the first time, but how it is different for everyone. She told them that some women may like it, and some women won't. Some men will be rough and take their own pleasure, some men will be good to you and some men may be too weak or shy to allow pleasure for either parties.

"Do you trust Jaime?"

"Yes."

"You'll be fine, Lorraine." Her sister handed her her notebook once she was finished writing her response.

"I hope you're right."

This time, Elaine was the one affording Lorraine with comfort. She leant to her and kissed her head gently,

"When am I not?" They both laughed and Elaine proceeded to lay her head on Lorraine's lap, passively watching the small ginger fur ball attacking a stray strand of yarn left behind and forgotten.

Forget me not, sister.

Lorraine

It was killing me. Waiting longer. I had waited for him to return, and he had returned. And now I was waiting for him to rest enough to be well enough to speak to me. After I had left Elaine to return Amber to my chambers I had done nothing but stared out at the slowly setting sun with my feet tapping nervously awaiting a knock on my door.

I felt like I was anticipating something with Jaime's return. Now that he was back, things would need to move. When he was still in Ashemark and his proposal was still quite fresh in memory we were operating under the laws of a kind of fantasy land, an in-between land. I did not feel any pressure or expectations looming over me, but I had a feeling that soon I would. I just hoped that Jaime would not hold me too closely to whatever expectations he may have, for some reason he does not strike me as someone with such persistently trivial wants. He had said to me once that I would make him happy, and that he would try and make me happy in return. And thus far, he has had much success.

Granted, he surprisingly makes me feel more emotions than just merely happy. He makes me angry sometimes, when I do not at all want to be. He had clearly gotten angry at me when he had told me about him leaving to King's Landing and he looked at me as if he expected me to accept it. Like I was supposed to admit that I had been out of my place somehow. He did not threaten me, perhaps that is what he continues to find interesting about our relationship.

I am not blind to what kind of a man Jaime Lannister is. I know that the way he is around me is not necessarily the same way he is around everyone else -and perhaps that is what drew me closer to him in return. I wished to explore why he was indulging me. But I got caught in all of it, and I stopped pursuing the question and just enjoyed his company. Far more than I thought I would.

Jaime Lannister, it seems, also had the power to make me feel nervous. For my stomach fluttered now and my eyes kept wandering to the door.

What was wrong with me? The man has just returned from a long journey, surely he would need far more than a few hours of rest.

Maybe when Jaime said I made him want to be good he had the opposite effect on me. But I refused to believe that, all of this is just new to me.

Talking with Elaine had not really helped all that much, it just reminded me of what was inevitable. Although at this point, i'm not really sure what would constitute as helping. Surely facing one's fears was favourable to of avoiding the issue until it claims you for itself. I had admitted to myself before that I did not fear the intimacy -not when I first thought of it. Surely, the pain must be exaggerated. But what if it is not? For some reason it was so easy to analyse myself and Jaime being intimate clinically, but I could not yet imagine it. I could not yet imagine his hands searching me -I have never even allowed my own hands to search my frame. I do not think I have ever even looked at my own naked form for too long. Copulating has been such an unlikely possibility in my life before meeting Jaime that I had not taken it upon myself to give myself a second thought. But I could not deny the growing physical feelings I was having, and they all centered towards my intended. I gave him my lips, that's what it felt like. Like I had handed them over to him, and he was still holding back. I could not yet decide how I felt, though it felt a little like rejection.

But how could it be rejection? He had asked me to marry him, to be his wife. He knew what it entailed. And he would spend all his time with me, he would stand close to me. I would watch his eyes flicker to my lips in moments I would not even expect. Why was he holding back? Why could his lips not yet touch any part of me that was not my hand -or nose? Why do I feel like there is nothing anyone can say to me to help me? Why do I feel so inconsolable? It's just a kiss. He's just a man.

I felt smothered, suddenly. The air grew thick and hot around me and I shot up out of my heavy chair. Amber rushed to my side and meowed at me.

You need not worry, kitten.

I placed it on my bed and made my way to the door, grabbing my notepad and its attached pencil in the process. I shut it tightly so as not to allow Amber to wander off and search its new home. I had to remind myself then that it wouldn't be its home for long, either.

My legs took me to the staircase leading me to the floor above where my chambers were. Absentmindedly, I kept my empty gaze on each grey step as I tried to steady myself. I almost lost my balance when I bumped into a hard frame once I had reached the final clearing. I looked up to find my golden knight -or lord, staring down at me in shock.

"Lorraine? What are you doing?" I believed he was referring to my slightly dazed state, and I hoped he did not notice the thin sheen of sweat that had accumulated at the top of my chest. His shocked disposition soon grew back to his easy arrogance,

"Have you come searching for me, my lady?" He questioned me, the mischievous glint not leaving his eyes. I awarded him with a scoff and a slap to his bicep.

I turned from him then, not knowing where to go now. I had found him, now what? We were between his rooms and mine, it's not as if we could yet conduct a conversation in either of our chambers. I moved down a couple of steps and sat myself down, savouring the feeling of the cold stone on through my dress. As expected, Jaime joined shortly after. He looked a little strange now that we had settled, like he was waiting to say something; or that he did not yet know how to phrase it. Nudging my shoulder to his gently, I expressed what I had meant.

"Out with it."

He breathed in, and that always worried me. What could he have in store for me now, I wonder? Was the kitten a consolation gift? Furthermore, you silly girl, why are you so worried? Calm yourself.

"I've received word from Casterly Rock." Was all he said and my blood hammered through my veins at what that could possibly mean. Surely, he did not mean to leave me once more? He had only just returned. I prodded him.

"What news?" He hesitated for far too long. And I found myself worrying more at whatever tragedy may have befallen the Rock, his home, than for what discomfort I may encounter towards him leaving. He opened his mouth to speak but nothing yet came out and he instead closed his mouth once more to reformulate his thoughts. When he finally spoke his voice sounded more hoarse than I expected it to,

"Nothing bad, really. Just that they're making the proper arrangements for you, for us." It did not sound very sincere, and I found myself fighting on whether right now would be the best time to question his sincerity. Before I could do anything he faced me and asked the very question I had been dreading to hear from anyone,

"Have you given any more thought -or any thought at all, to our wedding? Perhaps a date?" The care in his voice was almost insulting, like he thought I would break. He was right though, I almost didn't want to hear what he was asking. I hated having to admit that it was sensitive to me, that I was being a coward -a child, about it. I turned my head away from him in shame and shook it slowly. With a quick intake of breath he continued, still facing me,

"I just," slowly, he wrapped one arm comfortingly around and down my back and held my hand in his then as I slowly turned my eyes back to his, "I want you to know Lorraine, it is completely up to you. If you're not yet ready, I will wait. You are under no pressure, we can marry whenever you wish." I looked fully at him then, surprised by the direction the conversation had taken. I motioned,

"Really?" He chuckled lightly,

"Of course. Just do not test my patience in the process, my lady!" We both laughed at his comment but I could not shake the feeling of utter gratitude to the man I was now sitting very closely to. This man, I realised, I did not care what anyone else may have thought of him. He was good to me, and has demonstrated time and time again that he would understand me even when it was unreasonable of me to be so.

As we calmed down from our laughter I found myself stilling suddenly as now, our foreheads were touching. I did not move away. It seems that in Jaime's company, I rarely did. He closed his eyes then -which was a foreign sight for me, and he breathed in. He looked peaceful. Whereas my mind was frantically jumping from one action to another. I did not know whether to take action or risk moving and breaking this foreign yet comfortable position I had found myself in. I would gladly spend afternoons like this. But a part of me wanted, begged for more. My mind screamed, willing him to move. To for once take initiative.

When his eyes opened again something in me clicked. Suddenly his eyes were magnetic and those green orbs that are usually always filled with passive arrogance and mirth were darkened by something else entirely. His hand behind my back tightened slightly and so did the force around my heart. My blood pumped furiously at the sudden realisation; he was drawing me closer. It was agonising, moving at a slower pace than I could ever imagine. Suddenly, finally, the lips I had for so long questioned were but a breath away from my own. And in a moment, the moment when a wave finally crashes to shore, his lips claimed me.

He moved softly against me, and I could feel his heavy breath against my face. Why were his lips so soft? Why did they feel like lighting a tree on fire? Except I was the one on fire. His hand moved to my hair but I barely registered it as his lips trapped my own once again in a soft lock. So this is what kissing feels like?

It did not last for long, and Jaime pulled away from me slightly so our noses were now touching. He smiled softly at me as he stroked the hairs off my face -just like he did in my dreams.

"Forgive me, that was not very proper of me, my lady." I shook my head fervently at his statement, I would not let him taint this moment by assorting blame. Nothing felt wrong about this, nothing felt forbidden. I, Lorraine Marbrand, have just had my first kiss with Jaime Lannister on the cold stone steps of my own home. And it felt like sunlight would burst out of me at any moment.

Surprisingly, it was me then who was the one to break off the last of our contact as I made a sharp turn to my right pocket and reached for my notepad once more. I quickly wrote down my question to him and ripped the paper out. I took his hand in mine and placed the piece of paper in it and implored him to read it. His confused look only turned wry and proud at the content.

"How does after a fortnight sound?" I tried not be proud as well, for apparently I was still able to surprise him. I looked at him for a response and it seemed I would not be getting one until he once more caressed my cheek and finally opened his mouth to respond,

"My lady, if I had known how easy it is to persuade you, I would have kissed you long before now."