Hello hello. It's not been exactly a week, but I kinda missed writing and kicking back really gave me inspiration for what was to come. Every time I put my head down to sleep I would get so many ideas so it was pretty hard to run from. Et voila, the next chapter awaits you. Let me know what you think.

Jaime

He woke from a thankfully dreamless slumber with Lorraine still in his arms and waves of dark mahogany stuck to the underside of his arms. To say that he did not mind very much was an understatement. It still looked very early to him, he did not know how he could be up so soon, but his little wife still lay there peaceful in her sleep. Looking at her now, one would not think she held such a perplexed disposition right before they had gone to bed.

He almost regretted it. Almost. If he was not so invested he would have found her reaction to him spilling his seed outside her to be a little comical, but he knew it was not what she had expected. To be frank, it was not at all what Jaime had expected either. Not just the part including his ejaculation. Everything. He had planned on being gentle, and he believed he was -somewhat. He had expected to find a shy Lorraine clutching at her naked form and searching every inch of the room just so she would not have to look at him looking at her. But that wasn't what he found. She met his demands with a daring look in her eyes like she had something to prove. And he could not say he wished she were any different, she was perfect to him. He remembered her naked body from the night before and how he had sought to taste every inch of her, but he had to stick to what she would know and expect. As much as he was tempted to give her pleasure by kissing her where it would send waves of bliss all around her body, he did not want to do too much in one night. In truth, Jaime himself could barely handle the wait. He had exercised as much caution, patience and care he could just to afford Lorraine with the chance to relax and enjoy what he could do to her, but once he had felt how wet she had been for him already every thought he had in his head vanished and all he knew was touching, feeling Lorraine.

Lorraine Lannister. She was his now. And by extension he was hers. And in a few short days they would be back at the Rock and everything would be more real than it already was. He felt like he kept waiting for another step to take in order for everything to stop feeling like such a dream. As if the woman he had buried himself in the previous night was not proof enough that he had not imagined things.

That same woman stirred in his arms and so did something in Jaime. Gods, he wanted her. The sound of her voice alone last night had sent him on a desperate hunt to consume her completely. He could not yet believe that not three moons ago him being alone in a library with Lorraine so close to him was too confusing for him to handle and last night he had taken his first rights as her husband. And now peeking at the outline of her side and her crossed eye brows his arousal only grew, would it be like this all the time? Would he constantly want her? And would she always be so blissfully unaware? Moving his hand down wistfully to the curve of her hips he cupped her arse cheeks and squeezed at the soft skin. I was right, he thought, she is soft everywhere.

The unplanned gesture roused his wife suddenly and he regretted taking his liberties if it came at the cost of disturbing her. Maybe I have changed. Shifting his body away from her so he was not touching her he looked down and noticed that he was already half-hard and only had half a mind to consider getting rid of it. The sudden disappearance of his warmth must have agitated her further as she turned around fully to him, eyes wide and the sheets clutched tightly to her chest.

She looked radiant in the sleepy glow of the morning. Her hair mussed up and her slow smile returning, she let her lids drop a little as the haze returned to her. Still seemingly under the spell of whatever dream she had had in her sleep she moved her hand to his bare chest and circled her fingers lightly on his taut skin and it played on Jaime's heartstrings. He brought his arm underneath her and gently pulled her to him as she continued whatever rhythm she needed to play out. Now with her breath on his skin as well, he reached over with his left hand to touch the center of her own chest and started making his own shapes on her glowing skin. Whatever he had imagined about waking up next to Lorraine, this was not it. And it was somehow better.

"Good morning." He finally uttered as he smiled down at her. Her response was to nuzzle herself further into his neck and he dug through the mass of long dark hair to finally uncover her face and bring her nose softly to his lips.

They faced one another once more. Looking at her features, still absent and far away, he remembered how they had contorted at his invasion -how she gasped when he had entered her. Jaime was now clouded with the memory of the previous night thoughtlessly brought her to his lips eagerly as he moved his hand down to her knee and brought it across to his thigh so she could lay on him, inciting a pained hiss to escape her.

Lorraine had pulled away slightly with her hand still on his chest and a perplexed expression on her face like she was trying to figure out exactly where the pain was coming from. He looked at her, waiting tentatively for her to move again but he noticed the redness on her cheeks growing more and more and realised she was probably a little embarrassed by the pain and its subsequent interruption. He stilled then and cast a worried look,

"Are you in pain?" He asked, not entirely sure if he cared enough to stop. But she pressed her lips into a thin smile and shook her head dismissively, giving him a quick false reassuring glance as she removed her leg from him and rolled on her back.

They both just lay there for a long moment looking up at the orange ceiling and Jaime stifled his groan of frustration. As much as he did want to make love to her once again and show her that the pain is not permanent he also knew pushing Lorraine had never worked in his favour. He knew he understood this better than her, but he also knew she would not listen or accept it if he tried to persuade her. Or if he tried to persuade her without kissing.

She turned sharply on her side then and Jaime tried to ignore the flash of pain in her eyes at the soreness of her body. Motioning to him she asked,

"Where is the cat?"

He could not help but laugh. As boisterous and as youthful as he had ever heard himself laugh. He was in bed, naked, sporting an impossible erection brought on by the stirring of his new little wife and all she had to say was ask where the damn cat was. Placing his arm by her head and balancing on it so he was hovering over her slightly he caught her dry lips in a wet morning kiss.

"The cat is fine. She's with Elaine. We won't leave without her, I assure you Lady Lannister."

She giggled at his response and allowed him to place his wet kisses all around her face, neck and chest. He swirled his tongue on the very spots he knew would rouse her, knowing she was helpless to do anything about it. He would not make love to her now, but what he could do was drive her crazy enough to come running to him when she was ready. As she half-heartedly swatted his shoulders in an attempt to push him away from the torturous ministrations he was administering on her skin he let his hands dance with the curve of her waist and tickle the soft skin that awaited him there. Her skin was salty and tasted of the golden colour it was when it shined under the sun and Jaime felt the pulses of joy bleed through him as he eventually pressed his cheek against the skin of her chest and let himself rest there.

They stayed there like that for a while. He listened to her irregular heart beating and she played with his mane -that he had yet to grow out.

Jaime Lannister did not know if every morning would be like this one, but he knew from then on he would look forward to waking up knowing she was next to him.

Addam

He stood in the yard. It seems he was always standing in the yard. Ashemark had always been relatively quite, but in the past three moons there had far too many comings and goings for Addam's liking. When Jaime Lannister and his sister finally made it down to the courtyard to depart Addam felt like there was an impossible lump wedged in his throat that he could not yet swallow.

Time had flown by, and he had not even had the chance to sit with her privately and try and express how he was feeling about her departure. It devastated him, though he doubted anyone could see it but her. Addam returned for her, for what she had said. Lorraine was his dearest and most beloved and his sisters have been the only women he had ever known for such a long time. It all still felt surreal, like it all never really happened. It did not yet seem like something Addam could grasp that Jaime Lannister had found a wife in his very own sister.

It made him happy on many counts of course. Jaime was a man of strength and power, Addam had been his close friend for years. If any one were to marry Lorraine Jaime Lannister was as good a choice as can be. Addam would be uncle to the next Lord of Casterly Rock. Lorraine would want for nothing, she will be taken care of. But the thing was, Lorraine had never wanted much, really. And she would have been taken care of here, in Ashemark, right where Addam was. But he had to do this, he had to be strong for his sister. She had, over the years, done far more for him.

Lorraine had helped him over the years in many ways than just one, and he continued to find astonishment in the fact that someone still so young and sheltered could know so much. She had given him her prayers, praying day and night to any Gods that would listen to keep him safe. She offered him the relief of not having to form words he could not yet say. She understood him, the way she took the time to understand everyone. She steered and advised him to everything that would serve his best interest, and that included his own relationship with his wife.

He stood last. His father stood at the very first, followed by Elaine and then Margot. Jaime Lannister thankfully stood a good distance away, having already said his polite farewells and looked like he was prepared to mount at any moment now.

His father held Lorraine closely as he said goodbye, cradling her head and softly stroking her hair the way he used to when she was a little girl. He had spoken for long, telling her how she would be missed and imploring her to take care of herself and write to him. He asked her not to worry about them all, and she nodded fervently even though they both knew it was a lie.

Strangely, when Lorraine moved to Elaine Addam observed in shock as Elaine stood speechless, with nothing to say -for once. In a sudden movement she grabbed Lorraine to her and he heard a choked sob escape her. She cried into her shoulder and Lorraine stood with her eyes closed, composing herself and trying her best not to lose control. She kissed her sister's cheeks and pulled her away from her, grabbing her chin delicately to meet her gaze. When Elaine had finally summoned the courage to look back up at Lorraine she was awarded with a sincere smile, and light kiss on her head. Lorraine stroked her cheek and gestured,

"You will be fine."

Moving on to Margot after her messy encounter with Elaine Lorraine was relieved to be awarded with a quick hug and peck from Margot,

"I'll miss you, sister." And somehow Lorraine's smile found brightness at the words Margot had finally brought herself to utter.

She approached Addam with a sort of regretful stance, like it was not where she wanted to be, and she could not yet bring her eyes up to look at him. Un-balling his hands from the fists he had unknowingly created in nervousness he reached out and brought her gently to him and she hesitated before she reciprocated his embrace.

"Anything you need from me, you write and you will have whatever you ask. Do not forget that this is your home and you can visit any time you wish, my love. Ashemark is yours, and so am I" His breath shook slightly at what he had said and he was thankful that she was close enough for him to whisper to, he did not need anyone else hearing him. He was even more thankful that he did not need to look her in the eye as he said what he said next,

"I remember the day I first held you in my arms, and I swore I would never leave you. It remains true, my love. Know this, there is nothing I would not do for you. Make sure he treats you well." He finally peeled himself away and added with a flicker of a grin,

"Do try to breathe without me."

Her eyes were full of something, he could not tell. But her hands squeezed his tightly and he knew she was holding back, he knew she did not want to weep. He kissed her hands firmly and led her to her carriage, helping her in to the van. She looked at him wistfully before she could enter and gazed around at everyone else and her home.

"Be safe, sister." Smiling, she kissed his cheek quickly and he shut the door to the carriage before he could change his mind.

Nodding once to Jaime, the Lannister mounted and signaled for everyone in their party to make their way out of the already open gates.

His eyes followed them out past the nearing path until they disappeared behind the hills, off to Casterly Rock. His heart carried a weight and he could not tell how permanent it was. His sister, the one who was always there waiting for him, had now left.

Glancing back at Margot he noticed her eyes were wet now as she approached him, attaching her arm with his as she leaned her head on his tall shoulder she said,

"I wish I had a brother like you."

"How unfortunate you now have a husband like me."

She snorted at his ungracious comment and he let a small smile dance to his face. At least I still have Margot. She excused herself not long after saying she had to go fix herself and check on Elaine and left him there as his mind swarmed with thoughts and memories of the sisters he had and how they would all eventually leave him. Now, he thought, she is his wife more than she is my sister. She will be a mother to their children more than she is my sister. She will never again be, plainly my sister. He almost felt bitter.

And once again, Addam stood in the yard. Alone.

Lorraine

Ashemark left my sight as I looked back from the carriage a feeling of great loss settled upon me. After I could not see my home any longer I did not bother with looking upon the surrounding hills, I merely settled my gaze onto the ball of dusty orange sitting across from me.

For hours after that we rode on, making as much use of the daylight as possible. We did not stop, and Jaime did not come to ride near me whenever we slowed. Instead, I was left completely alone in the carriage with the exception of Amber. Even she was bored by now. I felt frozen and cold in the carriage, would it be like this all the time? My mind wandered to all that I had left behind but my face, even with no one else there to see it, remained motionless and blank.

Addam had been the hardest good bye of them all. Elaine's was not easy either. She never cried, and she was good at that. But I suppose the realisation that there was only Addam left and soon she would also be leaving became too much for her. I could see my white knuckles as I held and comforted her trying to hold myself back from succumbing to my emotions, I knew they would not do anyone much good.

I have always maintained that I have and always will do what best serves my father and siblings, even if it meant stepping on my own feelings or wants in the process, but at that instance it had never been that hard to accomplish. I felt like every brush against my skin and every word approaching my ears was just another thing poking me to weep. They all meant the same thing; they all were goodbye.

But it was not fair of me to wallow, it would not be fair to anyone. I could not live in in my new home wishing I was in my old one. I can not be any kind of wife to Jaime all the while wishing that I was not his wife at all. Shaking off the misery that had sat in the pit of my stomach since my departure my thoughts could only wander to all that had happened the previous night.

It was not exactly painful. Perhaps the only painful thing was how his stare burned through me when I stood bare before him. Oh and when he broke through my maidenhead, I suppose that hurt a little. It was more of a pinch, really. A deep push at some sort of elastic disc in my centre that snapped when he was deep enough.

Even I was surprised at how well I handled myself. I barely hesitated as I let him look at me, naked. And I did not stop his wandering hands at all even when they initially made me wonder why he would want to touch me there. Those thoughts were quickly expelled from my mind when I realised the sensation his touch gave me. Furthermore, I enjoyed it in a strange way. I felt full, like I had not realised that I was empty before. His closeness did something to me and I felt the strange pull grow to its peak when we joined. It was not perfect, though I am only assuming that I know what perfection is, but I was not prepared to enjoy it as much as I eventually did. Neither was I prepared for how it all...ended.

Janyne had told me, of course, that a man would finish himself inside you. That there was no point to any of it if he didn't, because that is how babies are made. So not only was Jaime's removal of himself from me at the last moment inconvenient to my growing pleasure but it also made our coupling, to the best of my knowledge, pointless.

I could net yet bring myself to understand it, why he would do it or if it was completely alright for him to do so. I am not especially eager to have children any time soon but I had assumed that that would be an integral part of my wifely duties -also as Lady Lannister. Wasn't the entire point of Jaime marrying me to continue the Lannister line? Whatever it was, though it frustrated me at not yet being able to understand it, it warmed just a little to think what Jaime's other reasons driving him to marry me had been. I fell asleep with no issue that night -though I suppose I could blame all the wine for that.

Yes, I think I can fairly say I enjoyed being had. And although it was quite the opposite of unpleasant to wake up in Jaime's arms and have him kiss me so freely, I knew I did not want him to be inside me again that morning. Perhaps it was because I was somehow sore or that the feeling of dread for the coming day unsettled me, but I felt different and undecided. I did not wish for my husband to take me if I could not yet be content -though what right do I have to refuse him? I had an inkling, one I hoped I could trust, that Jaime Lannister would not be the kind of man forcing his way into my cunt without my consent.

And yes, I can have profane thoughts. My silence does not mean I am particularly docile. Though looking at me now sitting in a carriage in silence, one could not be blamed terribly for thinking so.

Dusk was upon us, I noticed, and the carriage came to a slow halt. Suddenly pulled away from my train of thought my head poked out of the window curtains to see if he had stopped at an inn since there was very little surrounding sound. All I found was grass surrounded by a hilly terrain; we were in some kind of clearing in the middle of Gods know where.

My eyes continued to probe for something, anything, indicating what we were to do when the carriage door suddenly swung open and my leaning figure fell into my husband's broad chest as I yelped out in surprise. I looked at him, stunned for a moment that he even existed.

"You really ought to be more careful little wife" His smirk would have no end, it seems.

"Where are we?"

"Ah" He simply said, as if he's only just remembered why he had come to me. He continued,

"We're stopping here for the night. They're setting up the tents now, we'll have some dinner and sleep before we get moving again at first light."

Sleep? Here? Out in the open? My wide eyes must have betrayed my suspicion on the matter and Jaime scoffed a light laugh before caressing my cheek softly in what he must have assumed was a reassuring gesture.

"Is the new Lady Lannister being picky?" He teased. But I did not yet know how to answer. Was I being picky? I had never slept in a tent before. Though I suppose it has to do with the fact that I had never been on a journey long enough to warrant stopping anywhere.

So I simply nodded to my husband, and wondered if we would need to make anymore stops after tonight. He had told me a few days ago that the trip would not take too long, only a few days worth of riding, would we stop at sleep in a tent each time?

We had our dinner outside as they fully pitched our tent. I spent the first half of the time looking around us at the commotion and the various steps the party was taking to settle on to the campsite and the other half staring absently out at the clear horizon as Jaime spoke about his squire's new paramour.

I had only met Lewys a handful of times, but he seemed like someone I could grow fond of. Jaime surely was but I could not yet figure that out for myself.

I was drawn back to our "conversation" when Jaime let out a loud yawn as he stretched in his chair. He smiled lazily at me, not at all embarrassed by the display.

"The tent is up now. Let us retire, come." He outstretched his hand to me and despite myself I felt my head shaking at his demand. Strange, I had no issues with his demands the previous night. Lit by the glow of light from the camp he questioned me with his eyes as a flash of worry crossed him and I hoped he did not think I feared him or was afraid. I gestured,

"I would like to take a walk" He did not respond but only furthered his questioning glare, and I continued,

"My legs are stiff from sitting down all day." I shot up then hoping to not give him more time to argue when he got up with me and extended his arm out. I had almost forgotten that he was my husband now and would insist on doing things with me. Again, I found myself shaking my head at his gesture.

"You go sleep." He raised his eye brow,

"Surely you don't think i'd leave you to walk alone, my lady."

"You're tired"

"That doesn't mean you can wander off alone." My eyes begged him then, willing him to raelise that I wanted a moment alone. That was rubbish, I had had plenty of time alone in the carriage all day. I just did not want to retire the same time as him. I did not want to watch him undress, or have him watch me. I did not want to have to refuse him. Perhaps if I took a walk it would clear my head. I circled with my arms,

"Just around the campsite." His face was unmoving and hard,

"Lorraine, I-"

"I won't be long." And silenced him with a quick kiss on his lips. I was not yet used to such casual shows of affection, but while I still had to admit I was not at all in the mood for any sexual endeavors it still warmed me in a different way to feel his face so close to mine.

Nodding, and without another word, Jaime turned on his heels and made his way to our tent -which I made sure to make a note of in my head so I would not forget its location. I took myself around the campsite, my gown growing wet at the ends from the wet grass as I took in my surroundings. No one would speak to me, no one would approach me, was this how I was to be treated as Lady of the Rock? I felt like I had regained part of the invisibility I had had before being engaged to Jaime, which felt a little nice and nostalgic since it was what I thrived in, but it made me wonder whether anything had really changed. Whether I had really changed. Would Jaime Lannister get to change me at all?

It surprisingly did not take me long to walk the perimeter -the heavily guarded perimeter might I add, and I had found my way to our tent with ease. Once I had entered through the flap and tied the strings to close it tightly I looked around and realised it looked a lot larger from the inside than it did from the outside. It felt and looked warm, with a small caged fire lit in one corner, I barely registered Amber in a small cot next to it sound asleep. My eyes scoured the room further and found two small chests by a table and pair of chairs and finally settled my eyes on the bed to find a figure sleeping in it. I noted the boots discarded on the floor carelessly a foot away from the bed and the doublet and tunic thrown loosely on one of the chairs. It really had not been long since I left Jaime and he seemed to be in a deep sleep that even my entrance could not wake him, which told me that he must have been far more weary than he had originally let on.

I noted that there was no changing screen -not that I would need one with my husband deep in sleep, so I breathed in and moved to the side of the bed as I removed my own boots and unlaced my gown, leaving me in my shift.

This was the second night now that I had been left in my shift and my husband in his breeches, the difference being that he was not eyeing me like he would devour me at any second.

I lay myself on the bed, not touching him as he was facing the other end and I could not yet bring myself to touch him or cup him to my body so carelessly when I still did not yet know where I stood with him. I gave his back my own back and wondered whether he was angry with me, and if he would still be angry with me in the morning.

I listened to Jaime's steady breaths leave him and realised that I had never in my life felt so utterly alone. I missed my family, I missed Addam so deeply, and the only person I had with me I could not express my sadness to. He would get hurt, and think he displeased me, and I had already decided that now Jaime would be the one who's feelings I would consider. He was my husband. I am his and he is mine. I felt torn away from Addam's breast, torn away from his arms even though I knew my new husband would protect me. But he could never replace them, no one ever could. And a piece of me clenched and twisted at the memory of the six of us and father sitting by the fire in his study as Duncan tried to braid my hair.

The silence consumed me, and I blew out the last candle remaining on my nightstand. I lay there, stiff and unmoving next to the man I was supposed to love for the rest of my life, the man whose touch should ignite nothing but physical passion and tenderness all at once. I lay there, and for the first time in what seemed like years, I wept.

Next Chapter: Casterly Rock!

I urge you all to please review, especially with any criticisms so I know what to work on. Thank you all for reading x