I am so touched by the response to this story...I truly appreciate everyone who has taken the time to read, follow or review! This chapter takes place near the start of episode 8x15, the morning after the elevator scene. Featuring a cameo appearance from our new Darvey hero, Scottie :)

"So, Harvey, I am very pleased to see you again. I appreciate the way you are embracing our sessions, despite the initial reluctance you had."

"To tell you the truth, I wasn't really planning on making another appointment, but…it's been a hell of a week." He's exhausted already and it's only 9 o'clock. Why on earth had he agreed to an 8 am meeting?

"Why don't you tell me about it."

"Well, to start with, how about the fact that my ex-girlfriend showed up out of the blue after doing some shady shit, and I had to throw my own partner under the bus to keep her out of prison."

Stan raises his eyebrows. "That certainly sounds like quite a stressful situation."

"Yeah, you could say that."

"I think it is very admirable that you were willing to go to such lengths to help her, despite the fact that she is not in your life anymore."

He doesn't deserve the praise and he knows it. "I…wasn't even going to help her. Donna convinced me to."

"And how did she do that?"

"I guess she just helped me see that…winning this case would have actually felt like losing." He can't even count the number of times Donna has saved his ass from doing shit he'd regret. He remembers how he'd phrased it one time — 'That doesn't make me a good man…that makes you a good man for me.' It was true again, and probably always would be.

"I am sure this woman was very grateful for your help."

"Yeah. She actually…called after it was all over to thank me." Well, thank me and chastise me in one go, he thinks. A true Scottie special.

"It sounds as though the two of you have a very amicable relationship."

He feels a hint of amusement at Stan's assertion. "That's one way to describe it. But yeah…we have our moments. We were…on and off for a long time."

"I see. And you eventually decided that you were better off as friends?"

Friends? No. With Scottie it had always been lovers or nothing. "To tell you the truth, back then I just wasn't ready to be in a serious relationship. With anyone."

"And do you think you are now?"

"I mean, as ready as I'll ever be, I guess…" His mind starts drifting to his conversation with Scottie and the uncomfortable truths she had left him with last night.

"Harvey…I wanted to let you know that from now on I'm going to keep my distance. From the firm…from you."

The pain in her voice triggers a rush of guilt to his chest. "Scottie, you don't need to do that. I know we've both said some things we regret, but…"

"Yes, I do. I need to do this for myself, to let go of the possibility of us ever being…"

"Scottie…" He says in a low voice. It's a warning, an apology, and a plea, all in one word.

"You don't need to say anything, Harvey. I've made my peace with it. With us."

He really doesn't want to prolong this conversation, because he sees no point in opening old wounds. But he needs to know. "Scottie, was it all…my fault? Why things fell apart?"

"No, Harvey. I think maybe it just seemed…too good to be true, so I kept pushing you away just to see how many times you'd come after me before giving up. And I got my answer."

Now he feels like shit. Why does he always manage to hurt the people he cares about? "You think if we could go back to the start, and do it all over again, we could make it work?"

"Maybe you should be asking someone else that question."

"What? Who are you—"

"You know exactly who I mean, Harvey."

He rolls his eyes, frustrated with the sudden change in topic. Why'd she have to bring Donna into it? Why do people always do that? Why can't they just leave it alone? "If you're blaming Donna for the fact that we didn't last, I've heard that one before and I'm not interested—"

"Harvey." She cuts him off in an impassioned voice. "It's time for you to accept that Donna isn't a complication in your relationships. Your relationships are the complication preventing you from accepting that the person you really want a future with…is Donna."

"Harvey?"

Stan jolts him out of his reverie. It takes him a second to recall where he is. "You have not said anything in several minutes. Would you like to let me in on your thoughts?"

"Oh…what was the question?" He says wearily.

"We were talking about whether you feel ready for a serious relationship. And then I asked whether you had given any thought to what we discussed at your last appointment."

"Which part?" He asks, although he's pretty sure he can guess the answer to that.

"In particular, the ideas we were exploring at the end of the session."

He looks down, avoiding Stan's unrelenting gaze. "I guess, yeah, looking back…you're right. It's pretty goddamn messed up to date your therapist."

"And do you think you understand what led you to make that choice?"

He hesitates. "I think I...got mixed up in thinking that someone who helps you solve your problems because it's their job could be a substitute for someone who would do that without getting anything in return. Because they…care about you."

Stan smiles. "I am very happy to hear you say that, Harvey. That is a very thoughtful response to a difficult issue."

"Well, you sure gave me a lot to think about," he says grudgingly.

"I am glad. That is exactly the purpose of what we are doing here."

He doesn't know what to say next and wants to avoid having to talk about Paula again. His thoughts wander to his conversation with Donna the other day. "So…you're seeing Donna," he says, attempting to keep his voice neutral.

"You understand, Harvey, that I cannot discuss any details of my other client relationships."

"Right. I know." He pauses. "Is she…okay, though? I mean, I never really thought of her as someone who needed help with this kind of…stuff. I guess I was just worried that there was something going on with her. She's seemed kind of…on edge lately."

Stan smiles gently. "Did you think to ask her if there was anything bothering her?"

He feels sheepish. Why did everything sound so simple when Stan said it? "No…I mean…I was going to talk to her last night…but then I saw…" he trails off, ambiguously.

When he says nothing for a few moments, Stan prods gently. "What is it, Harvey?"

"She's…seeing someone. A client. I was going to ask her to get a drink, but she left. With him."

"And how did you feel, seeing that?"

"I guess I find it a bit ironic that she claimed to never date men she works with but seems to keep picking up at the office," he says, trying to sound disinterested but unable to keep a hint of resentment from his voice.

"I understand it can be frustrating when someone's actions seem to contradict their words." Stan looks thoughtful. "What were the circumstances in which she said that?"

"It was a long time ago. When we worked together at the DA's office."

"I see. And was she…referring to anyone in particular?"

He can tell that Stan already knows the answer to that question, and finds his indirectness irritating. "What do you think?"

Stan smiles. "Well, I suspect that it was directed at you."

"Bingo."

"And what...prompted her to say it?"

He doesn't think he could ever forget that conversation.

"You're afraid you'd fall for me."

"Oh, please. If anybody's falling for anybody, it would be you for me."

"Sounds like a challenge."

"One you are never going to get to take."

"Harvey?" Stan prompts.

"I was just…joking around about us seeing each other."

"And did you mean for her to take you seriously?"

Had he? Sure, he'd hoped she would, but then he'd been too much of a pussy to ask her out properly. "Not really…I mean…I guess I just wanted to see her reaction."

"And yet you seem to have taken her quite seriously."

He's thrown by Stan's comment. "What do you mean? Why wouldn't I?"

"Well, people are not set in stone, Harvey. Circumstances change. Feelings change."

Feeling annoyed at the implication that he'd somehow misinterpreted her comment, his voice starts to rise. "I was respecting what she wanted! She said to put it out of our minds and never mention it again!"

Stan looks unbothered by his outburst. How did he always manage to stay so frustratingly calm? "What was it exactly that she wanted to put out of your minds?"

He freezes. He's not sure why but he hadn't planned on letting Stan in on that part of their story. Maybe it just made it seem all the more pathetic, that he'd known exactly how he wanted her that day and had somehow managed to spend thirteen years trying to forget.

"Our…the idea of…being together…in that way." He stammers.

"So, I take it that the two of you chose to focus on developing a professional relationship."

"Yeah. I guess in a way it was…probably a good decision. Back then I was pretty much a…dick to women and I probably would have driven her away."

"It is very commendable that you have succeeded in maintaining such a positive working relationship for so many years, despite the complicated feelings involved. It indicates a great deal of respect for each other."

"I mean, I haven't always been…I used to get…jealous when she was with other guys. I thought it was because her job was to take care of me, and whenever she was off with someone I felt like her focus wasn't where I wanted it to be." He's ashamed to admit it, but it still feels good to say it out loud. Every truth that escapes his lips feels like it's slowly releasing a decade's worth of restraint. "I wanted to know she would always be there for me, whenever I needed her."

Stan's giving him that look again, the one that feels like pity but damn it, he doesn't care. He deserves it.

"Harvey, forgive me, but…this sounds a description of a spouse, not a secretary."

"I know." His voice cracks. "I know that now."

Stan observes him quietly for several moments. "Harvey, I am proud of you. You have made a great deal of progress by accepting your true feelings."

"Progress to what? She's with Kessler now. For all I know, she's…in love with him." It hurts to say the words. He realizes he has no idea how long it's been, and the thought unsettles him. Had she been with him when they'd gone out for drinks after Louis became managing partner, and he hadn't been able to stop his hand from grazing the small of her back all night? "She didn't even tell me."

"Perhaps it is still very new."

"Yeah…maybe." He tries to remember how they interacted with each other, but all he can remember is the look on her face when she wished him goodnight. There's something else bothering him. "For some reason I didn't even feel...jealous of him. And I should have been. I mean, he's a goddamn CEO…tall…charming…he can give her everything she deserves."

"Well, it takes some time, but when you truly love someone, you may reach a point where you want them to be happy, even if that happiness does not come from being with you. That is when love overcomes jealousy, and you can reach acceptance."

"You're telling me I'm happy she's with another guy right now?" He says incredulously.

"I am saying that her happiness means more to you than your own. And that is a beautiful thing, Harvey."

"Yeah, well, a fat load of good it's doing me," he says dejectedly. "Now I just get to watch her move on because it took me too damn long to get my shit together."

"Harvey, we all come to realize things in our own time. You said yourself the timing would not have been right when you first met. I would not blame yourself for this."

"Thanks, Stan." He sighs when he remembers what's waiting for him back at the office. Of all the fucking furniture companies in the world, it just had to be his. "I should get back to the firm." He drags himself off the couch, thinking that's the last place he wants to go right now. He could use a drink. Or ten.

"Before you go, Harvey…keep this in mind. There is no such thing as the perfect time. Often when we wish for such a thing, we are merely making excuses to put off an action that we are afraid of failing at."

"Well, maybe sometimes the consequences of failing are impossible to accept." The words tumble out of his mouth before he even realizes what he's saying.

Stan smiles. "I would not worry about that. From what I know of you, Harvey, once you put your mind to something, you do not often fail."

Thank you again for reading! Hope you liked this installment. We're getting there...denial is the name of the game with these two! My plan for the next chapter is for Donna to call Lipschitz while everyone else is at the hearing. Let me know if you have any thoughts or suggestions :)