Hi! OMG... You think you suffered while waiting for this! Think again!

All right... forget that ever happened... I've just been soooooooooo busy!

And I'm soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo happy I can FINALLY write and update! :) *happy me*

ENJOY!

Chapter 54

It had been two weeks since Odin had banished his stepson to the bitter cold of Jotenheim. The tension in the palace was high and heavy with sadness but also with fear. Two days after his return, The Allfather had ordered a feast in his honour for which his whole kingdom was invited. It would have been a night of celebration, if not for the fact that Odin decided to, without warning, uncover Loki's true parentage and crimes. Ever since that unfortunate second, all the smiling faces had disappeared. Asgard had turned into a grim and dark place. No Asgardian fully knew what to think of the situation. Some felt betrayed by Loki, others could not place the idea of a Frost Giant into Loki's great deeds and sacrifices over the past few years. But what could they do? The Allfather had forbidden any speech about his stepson as if trying to not only exile him from his realm, but also banish him from the Asgardian memory.

Thor quickly made his way through the silent hallways of Asgard. Every now and then, he passed an angry looking warrior or servant. Naturally, they blamed their prince for letting things come this far. Odin had taken back his throne, but his rule was hard and dark. As Captain, Thor was expected to bring forward the peoples troubles to the king in order to find a solution. However, Odin just refused to listen to anyone, including his son.

"Thor! Finally!"

Fandral, smiling widely, stepped forward and handed his friend an almost overflowing cup of red wine. Thor smiled shortly, took the cup and dropped Mjölnir on the ground before crashing down on the nearest chair he could find.

He looked around the room. In the middle burned the usual fire, but even those flames seemed to burn less enthusiastic. Around the fire set his friends: Lady Sif, The Warriors Three and Arya, who seemed to be lost in thought. The former Captain sat in a chair, pushed away in the corner with her legs close to her chest and her untouched goblet of wine in her trembling fingers. Thor let his eyes rest on the raven haired girl for a while, wondering once more why she seemed so upset and lost. Of course he understood that she was sad about losing her job, but after two weeks?

Thor scanned the rest of his friends. He almost felt sad to see them wearing casual Asgardian clothes instead of their harnesses. Odin had not forgotten about their part in Loki's escape together with his son six years ago. But since The Allfather felt more paranoid than ever before, he'd allowed them to remain free of charge on Asgard. However, the four warriors were grounded for two months and that included no fighting and no travelling outside Asgard.

"Where's Jane?" Thor asked after a short silence.

Volstagg who sat in the chair next to him, raised his shoulders. "I don't know, but I suppose she's with Frigga. Our little princess was crying again this morning…"

The God of Thunder sighed and closed his eyes for a second while letting his head rest on the back of the chair. He'd barely seen his wife and daughter over the last few days. His only excuse was that he was trying to make things right and perhaps get Loki back on Asgard in the process. That seemed to be a rather hard job now that he wasn't allowed to even mention his brother's name.

Suddenly Jane stormed in the room. She looked around, a deep frown of worry crossing her face. Thor looked up and raised his eyebrows.

"Has anyone seen Frigga?" Jane asked. Everyone in the room turned to the worried mother.

"Is she missing?" Sif asked.

Jane sighed and rubbed her forehead. "She was with me at lunch!" she said. "Suddenly Prince jumped on my lap. I figured he wanted some leftovers, so I gave him some, but when I looked up, Frigga was gone! And just like that, Prince decided to bail as well! I swear those two are working together! That is one evil, puppy-eyed wolf!"

Fandral laughed aloud. "So she ran off…" he said. "I don't think you need to worry, Jane. As long as Prince is at her side…"

Jane sighed again and rubbed her eyes. How on Earth was Fandral capable of laughing this much?

"She'll turn up eventually…" Volstagg added with a kind smile. Yet Jane and Thor didn't seem convinced. The two parents shared a look, before Thor got on his feet and put down his full goblet.

"I'll find her, sweetheart…" he said with a tired smile.

"She's with Heimdall!" a sudden voice suddenly sounded from the corner. Everyone turned towards the source. Arya sat up straight in her chair, her legs still pulled up against her chest. She'd put aside her cup. "I saw her leave the palace before I came here. She goes to Heimdall to ask about Loki…"

Everyone turned silent. For starters, they were surprised to hear Arya speak after such a long time of short responses. Besides that, everyone was wondering whether or not they had to go and find the little princess or not.

Arya let her eyes float over her friends before smiling softly. "I think it's better if we leave her alone for a while…" she said as if she could read their thoughts.

-xxx-

Heimdall watched the little girl in front of him with a cheerful curiosity. Frigga sat at the edge of Bifröst with her feet dangling outside. She certainly had no fear of falling, which was normal since Heimdall had told her about the invisible force field, surrounding the building. The young princess carefully flicked the pages of the enormous book on her lap.

Heimdall would recognize that book anywhere. He'd seen it being passed down for generations. He, himself had given it to the Great Merlin, when the Forces Of Old had chosen him. Merlin had left it for his most trusted pupil: Frigga, Queen of Asgard. She had passed it to her stepson, Loki, son of two worlds, God of Mischief. Now he had delivered it to its next owner. Frigga, the second of her name, Child of Midgard, Princess of Asgard, The Lady of Light.

Outside the Bifröst stood Lyn, Frigga's trusty horse. Over the last two months Frigga had discovered that, in contrast with her magic lessons, horseback riding came rather natural. Her father had told her that it probably had something to do with the strict royal line of horses, only meant for their respective riders, but Frigga couldn't care less. All she wanted was to ride as much as possible and Lyn seemed to share that desire. At first Frigga had been slightly scared and surprised about the speed her horse could reach. Lyn easily ran passed any horse, including her father's and Loki's, on Asgard. When she was riding Lyn, Frigga felt as if she could fly. Yet, ever since Loki's banishment, even Lyn hadn't been able to bring Frigga's smile back to her face. It almost seemed as if the white horse could sense Frigga's change of attitude and mood, because it cautiously eyed her rider, not at all distracted by the enthusiastic jumping form of Prince who was chasing the dancing sparkles which the Bifröst cast upon the ground, around the room.

Frigga turned the pages at a slow pace until she hit upon a rather old piece of yellowish parchment, stuck between too pages. Merlin, Queen Frigga and Loki had put many of these extra documents in between the book to grant more information on the spells on the respective pages. A cold shiver ran down Frigga's spine while her eyes floated over the old picture of a Frost Giant. Little black runes were penned on several places on the Jotun's body. The runes were Old Norse, but Frigga knew that these ones in particular were numbers, referring to the numerous clarifications in the right hand corner.

Around the pictures stood various notes, probably consisting of extra information or spells, but Frigga couldn't translate. Usually, Loki would translate the Old Norse runes for her, although, recently, Frigga had discovered that Heimdall also mastered Old Norse.

"Heimdall?" Frigga suddenly asked, catching the Guardian's attention once more. "I was wondering… if Loki is a Frost Giant, why did his real mother and father not raise him?"

Heimdall frowned, but smiled. Frigga always managed to ask the most interesting questions.

"I doubt we'll ever know…" Heimdall lied. He'd followed every word of Loki's and Farbauti's conversation, now two weeks ago. Yet, Frigga wouldn't understand why a mother would cast out her child willingly.

"Are they all bad?" Frigga continued asking. "I mean, the Frost Giants?"

Heimdall raised his eyebrows. "The Jötuns have always been an enemy of Asgard…" he finally said.

Frigga vaguely nodded. "But Loki is a Frost Giants as well…" she whispered while focusing her eyes on a the distant stars as if she could spot Jotenheim from where she sat. "Loki is not mean…"

Heimdall considered Frigga's words. Of course he didn't believe in good and bad. Heimdall had lived long enough to understand it lived next to each other like darkness and light. Not one existed without the other, but how to explain that to a six year old.

Carefully Heimdall sat down next to the young princess and put one hand on the old picture of the Frost Giant in the book.

"Do you know why this picture is within this book?" he asked after a short silence. Frigga slowly shook her head. Heimdall winced almost invisibly. The young princess' face lacked any kind of childlike happiness. Her bright blue eyes seemed darkened with the trouble of a grow up. The Guardian quickly recovered and smiled softly.

"Queen Frigga, your grandmother, once added this page to the book. I remember it well! She came to me every day, not to ask questions, but to watch the stars, in search for hidden and ancient answers. I, myself was one of the few who knew of Loki's real parentage, so I realised Frigga was looking for the same answers as you."

Frigga turned to the Guardian. "What did she find?" she asked silently.

Heimdall smiled mysteriously and turned towards the empty space next to him. His golden eyes turned foggy when his mind repeated an old memory before his eyes.

MEMORY

"My good lord, Heimdall…"

Heimdall turned his attention toward his queen. The fair blond lady stood at the back of the Bifröst, her toes touching the edge. She didn't look his way, but kept her gaze on the universe before her. Long golden hairs caressed the back of her silver gown and touched her trembling hands, folded on her lower back.

"My lady?" The Guardian answered.

"You know why I am here?" Frigga asked. "You are aware of my research…"

The Allmother fell silent and Heimdall patiently waited for her to continue.

"Tell me, my friend! Tell me the answers I seek, if your knowledge allows you to do so… I am equally blinded by hatred and love, by stories and legends, by fiction and fact…"

Without a sound, Frigga turned on her heals in one swift movement. Her normally bright eyes, were scarred by an anxious fear.

"I do not know where to turn, lord Heimdall!" the Queen exclaimed. She started pacing around Bifröst. "I know what answer I desire, but is it true? I know what I want to hear, but I would only be fouled by my own thoughts! Heimdall, I have searched the archives for similar occurrences, yet none has been recorded so far! My research on our enemies, our allies has left nothing but confusion for myself."

"My lady, may I point out that confusion may equalize answers. Perhaps my queen has found answers, yet not those she expected to find."

Frigga stopped pacing and turned towards the golden Guardian. A deep frown appeared on her face.

Lost in thoughts she continued. "All creatures must have a concept of love…" she murmured. "Without it, existence is not possible, for how do you raise your child if you do not expect it to grow?"

The Queen shook her head and quickly moved her hands over each other. A flash lit up the Bifröst and the big book of spells appeared in her palm. Without saying a word, Frigga started to leaf through the pages until she came to a halt on a certain piece of parchment. She carefully removed the picture, put it on the golden floor and looked further. Minutes passed and every now and then, the Queen picked another piece of parchment with various pictures, from the book, until the ground was covered with seven different pictures. Frigga let her eyes wander over the parchment.

"Behold, good Heimdall: the creatures of our realms! Good and evil, mortal and gods alike…" she spoke while slowly walking among the six pictures. With every one she passed she named the creatures on it.

"First there is us," Frigga started at the first piece of parchment. "The Aesir, the Asgardians… The Gods… We are to present all what is good and just."

Frigga looked up, as if she expected Heimdall to respond, but the Guardian remained silent, so the Queen continued.

"Secondly, the Vanir, the Vanheimers, older Gods, the first to possess the power to wield magic, as is told in the stories of old. We now live in perfect harmony… Again, a model of justice…"

Heimdall smiled softly, but kept quiet and let his queen continue.

"Then we have the Light Elves, bearers of light. Known to possess mysterious powers, different from the magic of old. Strange creatures, yet no harmful thought would cross their minds…"

Frigga fell quiet when her eye caught the next picture. It wasn't very detailed as the ones before. "Dark Elves…" she whispered. "The exact opposite of the Light Elves. Creatures of greed, yet forgotten in the river of time. Next, we have the creatures born in the fires of Muspelheim…"

Frigga picked up the parchment she was talking about, but it held no pictures, only a few notes. "Demons and Fire Giants, led by the tyrant Surt… that's all we know for they only exist in legend and we cannot set foot on their realm of fire. At last we have the Frost Giants, Jotüns, sworn enemies of Asgard."

Frigga looked back up at the Guardian. "You see Heimdall? Our realms exist of legends, of good and bad, but how do we understand one if we cannot be the other? How do we know the concept of good and bad, of dark and light, if we are only one?"

Heimdall smiled. "I believe my Queen already knows the answer on these questions. Why else would you be here and ask me?"

Frigga sighed. "When I look at Loki, I cannot see the sworn darkness in his eyes, although I see a difference with Thor. I cannot name it, Heimdall! I cannot understand, because we don't have an explanation in these realms!"

Heimdall slowly made his way to the back of the Bifröst. "I'm afraid you are missing the obvious solution, my lady," he said. "We do have an answer on the subject of good and bad…"

Frigga frowned while Heimdall took the book from her hands and searched for the right page. When he finally found it, he turned the book so his Queen could read it.

"Humans, my lady…" he said while watching Frigga's eyes grow big. "Their history is filled with wars and injustice. However, if you watch closely, no human was ever pure evil, nor pure goodness. They tend to take our legends of gods and demons to justify or their actions and this in every belief they have. Although there are those who find the mortals insignificant, I think them rather interesting. For they make the same mistakes in their short lives as we do in ages. They suffer the same problems and fears. And yet they live from day to day, knowing more about what is good and bad and how they live next to each other for they see it every day. If you attempt to learn what lies in our youngest prince, I suggest you start there."

Frigga looked up. "But Loki has no link the humans at all! Why would I find answers on Midgard?"

Heimdall raised his shoulders. "As I said before: my lady already knows the answers she seeks. Perhaps you are afraid to see…"

Frigga, The Queen of Asgard nodded. She moved her hands through the air and her book disappeared together with the pages on the floor.

"Then I will visit the human world and face my fears!" she proclaimed. "Send me to Midgard, good Heimdall. I thank you for your counsel!"

The Guardian smiled and bowed his head before making his way back to the centre of the room.

"Pay attention, my queen. War rages over the lands!" he said before activating the Bifröst to send his queen to Midgard.

END MEMORY

Frigga looked up at Heimdall, trying to picture her grandmother. She sounded so wise and strong…

"What did she find?" the little girl asked. Heimdall smiled. Finally that excited spark was back in the young princess' blue eyes.

"After her journey to Midgard, Queen Frigga travelled among the other realms. She visited Alfheim, Nidavellir and Vanaheim, and even set foot upon Jotenheim and the barren hills of Svartalfheim, trying to put her new knowledge to practise. That is, to see whether or not the human ideas fitted within the legends of old. When she came back, she came to me…"

Frigga blinked confusedly. Why was it that Asgardians couldn't just stick to the point? Why always so many words! When Heimdall's words finally got meaning she said: "What did she tell you?"

"Queen Frigga told me this:" Heimdall started with an almost proud expression covering his face, "Ideals of an immortal creature like ourselves are based on legends and stories. We take them for granted without realising we are fouled. We put different kin in different places, on different realms as if that keeps them from spreading their ideals. We think in black and white, swimming in the worship of the human folk, forgetting that we too have a complex society. We think of "evil" as a faraway problem: the Frost Giants, The Dark Elves, … However, during my stay on Jotenheim, I disguised myself as a Jotun. I saw much hatred towards us, Asgard… They think us "evil". They know "love" like ours. They know friendship and honour. A Jotun family took me in when I was in need of shelter and they let me live with them for at least a fortnight."

Heimdall fell quiet.

Little Frigga sighed. "Okay…" she muttered. "So your saying they're not … bad?"

Heimdall laughed shortly. "Queen Frigga told me many stories in which she explained her findings, but I will not bother you too much with those. What she said to me in the end, was this: "There is only one concept of "loving", no matter how broad you take that concept. Love for a friend, love for a lover, love for a child… That concept is practised in only one way, across our realms. You will find it everywhere… However, it's how an outsider experiences it, that brings about confusion. When a mother kills an intruder to protect her child, the friends of that intruder will not take her actions as "love", but as an act of hate and violence. They, on the their part, might attack out of "love and honour", which, again won't be understood as such."

Frigga blinked and squinted her eyes shut. Her mind was spinning. She absolutely preferred Loki's lessons. At least the God of Mischief was capable of being understandable!

"What does that have to do with Loki? Did she find an answer?" Frigga asked after a short silence. Heimdall sighed. He understood Frigga was too young to understand this, but he'd had the feeling she needed to know. Perhaps to make sure she didn't get a black and white image of the world as so many Asgardians had before. The golden Guardian was certain that, when she was older, Frigga would understand.

"What I am trying to tell you, is what Queen Frigga told me on the same day on which Loki fell off the Bifröst and was thought dead. In many ways, Loki had done bad things, for which Odin secretly blamed his Jotun parentage. Frigga, however, saw things differently…"

Frigga frowned and waited. Instinctively she knew that Heimdall was finally going to give her an answer.

Heimdall locked his eyes on the stars, smiling softly. "Young Frigga," he said, "there are many colours of darkness. There is as much good as bad in the universe. In fact, there one and the same. What do you see when you think of "evil"?"

Frigga frowned again and bit her lip. "I think of my nightmares…" she said. "And of the Tesseract… I think of wars and my parents fighting."

"What do you think of the Frost Giants?"

Frigga raised her shoulders. "I don't really like them, but…"

"But Loki is one of them!" Heimdall finished. "There you have your problem, the same problem Queen Frigga faced. Evil for you is darkness, noises of battle, blue Tesseract Energy,… For others, take the Frost Giants, is this different. They are raised with a hatred towards Asgard, towards light, towards gold, towards magic. All the things you love…"

Frigga slowly nodded. "But…" she started. "But there are things that we both have, right?"

Heimdall raised his eyebrows in question. Frigga swallowed and searched for the right words.

"Like… Like fear to loose someone… I don't want to lose Loki, or my mommy, my dad or Arya… The Frost Giants don't want to lose their friends either!"

Heimdall smiled broadly. Frigga had gotten his message after all. Something that took the most brilliant Asgardians years to grasp, had taken her only minutes.

He smiled mysteriously and bowed forward. "Perhaps," he whispered, "you are not so different after all…"

-xxx-

Loki sighed, watching his breath rise to the ceiling and disappear in the cold air of his cell. Two weeks… The God of Mischief shivered and winced. His body was aching in every possible way. Two weeks of absolute torment. Every day, a Jotun guard, grinning stupidly, would open his cell and drag Loki's mortal body to the enormous stadium, just outside the centre of the Jotun stronghold. Loki figured the building had been constructed after the infamous wars against Asgard, because next to the palace, it was the only one which looked somewhat impressive. Rows of seats rose up around the central open stage, making the stadium look like the old Midgardian Amphitheatres. Once Loki had been thrown inside once more and he'd managed to crawl back on his feet in an attempt to regain at least a tiny bit of his honour, some other Jötuns would open the icy gates, allowing a monstrous looking creature to enter while the audience would cheer like a bunch of lunatics. All Loki had to his disposal was a rusty sword, something that looked like a shield and a couple of ropes. Yet every time, the young king had managed to somehow defeat the creatures, using his knowledge on fighting and deceiving.

Loki grunted. Who was he kidding? Those creatures were far from what he used to fight in the past and thereby an immediate insult to his status and skills. But what could he do? His body simply didn't allow any more. Once he was done fighting and he'd sunk on his knees, bleeding, aching and exhausted, a few of Farbauti's personal "assistant" – they were obviously only trying to impress her – would enter and enjoy using Loki as their moving target practise for at least half an hour, until the young king could do nothing else than yield and admit his defeat. Never they did him true harm. No broken bones, only some epic bruises, scratches and perhaps a sprained ankle, but never enough to keep him inside his cell.

Feeling miserable and lost, Loki closed his eyes. He was back where he had started: locked up in a cell, by Odin's doing, with no power whatsoever. Loki had never been homesick no matter how long he was away from Asgard. That was probably the result of the constant feeling he'd had, even as a child, that he didn't fully belong in the realm of the Gods. This time however, Loki craved to go back. Back to the light, the sounds, the warmth… back to Thor's stupid face, to Fandral's jokes, Sif's teasing, Volstagg's impressive appetite… Back to little Frigga's trust and kindness and back to Arya's beautiful smile.

Don't be too depressed folks... I'm not THAT evil...

I do hope you enjoyed it! Please forgive me for making you wait this long. I honestly would like to write more, but I'm just so freakishly busy... But no fear! I will not forget you!

Anyway, let me know what you think! Please review!

And I'll see you in another life!

Rumple x