I can't seen to stop myself from adding to this one.
"I'm as big as a house, how can you still look at me that way?" Brienne stared down her husband, from the bed she had been trapped in for two days now.
"Because you, my beautiful wife, still look absolutely ravishing, despite having neglected to brush your hair. " he crawled across the bed, and tucked a strand of her hair back into place. She swatted his hand away and crossed her arms.
"That's because moved my hairbrush all the way across the room, and since your evil children refuse to leave when they are meant to I am stuck in the accursed bed! " Brienne snarled, Jaime leapt to his feet, and went to get the brush.
"My deepest apologies My Lady." Jaime came back and held the brush out to her as he would a sword.
"Oh piss off!" She snatched it from him, and started to brush her hair.
"It was your idea to return to Winterfell while you were pregnant, likely with twins none the less." Jaime moved to sit beside her, striking his hand over her very large belly.
"I swore to return to Lady Sansa, I couldn't simply ignore my oath to her because you can't keep your hands to yourself." Brienne set the brush aside, and leaned into him. He wrapped his arms around her, pressing a kiss to her neck.
"Lady Sansa told you to stay on Tarth. In fact she was absolutely thrilled with the idea of the Evenstar of Tarth being sworn to her. You are the one who said we had to come North to ensure she was being properly looked after before we could settle down." Jaime put himself between her and the wall so she could rest, laying flat upset her stomach.
"Fine, I'm unreasonable, and now I'm suffering for it." She pouted, he leaned down to kiss the top of her head.
"I never said that." He whispered, she squeezed his hand gently. A knock at the door broke the peaceful bubble of half sleep that had settled around them.
"Enter." Brown's voice came out heavy with sleep, she felt as if that were all she did lately.
"Sir Brienne, Sir Jaime. I brought dinner, and there is someone here to see you." Podrick carried a trey into the room full of food. Brienne covered her face with a little gag. Jaime looked over the food, picking up the steamed turnips.
"Come on Pod, you know root vegetables upset her stomach." He handed the bowl back to him, Podrick cringed, rushing the bowl out into the hallway.
"Sorry." He said, Brienne shook her head.
"You know you don't have to keep serving me like a squire Podrick, you've been a knight for months now." She said, he gave that goofy smile of his.
" I know, you've told me six times since you got here, but I serve Lady Sansa, and she wants me to look after you. Now, like I was trying to say before Tyrion is here to see you, I just wanted to be sure you were decent before I sent him up." Podrick gave her a look, Jaime smiled, eager to see his brother for the first time since he'd left King's Landing.
"Oh go on, I know you're eager to see him, I don't have the energy to entertain his... Enthusiasm for conversation." She leaned forward to let him remove himself from the bed.
"What a tactful way to say Tyrion won't shut up." Jaime laughed, and took his plate.
"I will entertain him, and try not to get too drunk." He leaned down, and kissed the top of her head. She smiled, only to double over, clutching her stomach.
"Brienne!" He dropped back down beside her, clutching her hand.
"I'm fine, it's fine. You know this happens this close to the birth." She gave his hand a squeeze, but his brow still creased with worry.
"Oh for fuck sake, just go. The pair of you are like mother hens hovering over me night and day." She waved him off. He backed away from her reluctantly, he had never worried so much about Cersei when she was with child, but he'd never been allowed to dote on her, and she had never been bedridden.
"Here I thought I would have to come to you, what convinced you to leave the bedside of you blushing bride?" Tyrion raised a cup to him, Jaime took it with a heavy sigh.
"I'm down here because my wife thinks you talk too much, and she is tired." He sat down across from Tyrion, and drank half his cup of wine.
"Well she's not wrong, but something is. You look horrible. I expected you to be obnoxiously happy." Tyrion sipped at his own cup with a skeptical gaze.
"I am happy, ridiculously, but I'm also terrified. All my children are dead Tyrion, one by my own hand, and now my wife is bedridden because of the labour, if I lose her..." Jaime trailed off, looking into his cup.
"You mean if your children are born like me." Tyrion have a hateful look to his wine, Jaime shook his head.
"What happened wasn't your fault Tyrion, and it wouldn't be theirs, but the things that came after. What it did to Father. Tyrion promise me you will never let me become that." He slugged down his wine, and refilled his cup.
"I shot out father, and I certainly won't let anyone else turn into him, besides Sir Brienne ia too stubborn to let you be rid of her." Tyrion said, Jaime nodded, trying to sip his wine, he had after all promised not to stumble into drunk in the middle of the night.
"Twins Tyrion, gods I hope they don't end up like we did." Tyrion sucked down his wine, trying not to make a snide comment while his brother was obviously troubled.
"Maybe they'll both be giant girls, and be nothing like you." Jaime laughed despite himself. He would love that.
"Did they give her a proper burial, or a pyre at least?" Jaime finally asked the question Tyrion knew would come.
"She was given a pyre fitting a queen, I made sure of it. She may have been cruel, but at least she was consistent. Things down south are turbulent at best. Why do you think it took me so long to visit?" Jaime nodded, leaning his head back against the tall chair.
"Thank you." He whispered , Tyrion shook his head.
"Enough of this depressing talk, tell me about Lord Selwyn Tarth walking in on you and Brienne while yoI were in bed!" Tyrion leaned across the table, Jaime made a face.
"By the gods is there nothing you don't find out? You were never such a gossip about my love life before." Jaime his his laugh in a sip of wine.
" that is because I never wanted to hear about you cavorting with our sister, and no, I hear everything, so explain. " He raised a brow at Jaime, who his his face in his hand.
"We weren't at that, we were eating, though we weren't exactly dressed for company." Jaime blushed, not a common thing for him, which delighted Tyrion.
"I'd have loved to see the look on Lord Selwyn's face wh enough he saw his oh so innocent daughter in bed with a Lannister. " Tyrion threw his head back to laugh.
"She wasn't that innocent." Jaime smirked at the memory of their time together.
"Gods I hope you didn't say that to him!" They were both laughing now, he couldn't help it, seeing Tyrion again felt good, anchored him in some sense of his old life.
"No! I would have been cut down, have you met her father, he's even bigger than her!" Jaime's look of exaggerated horror made Tyrion nearly fall off his chair. In their myrth Jaime nearly missed Podrick running through with a hug of steaming water, and an arm load of cloth.
"Podrick! What's going on?" Jaime leaned around Tyrion to get a look at him.
" the babies are coming! " He yelled without stopping, Jaime leapt to his feet, sending the chair crashing across the floor, and jumped the table to get to the stairs. In his haste he beat Podrick to the room.
"Jaime!" Brienne reached out, and grabbed a hold of his golden hand with a crushing grip that nearly took the thing of his arm.
"I'm right here!" He took a cloth to try and mop her brow, trying his best to be supportive as the Maester, and the others did the important work.
Tyrion had no desire to be in the room while Brienne gave birth, and instead busier himself trying to finish off the wine.
"It's rather loud up there now, even in battle, I have never heard Brienne tell quite so viciously." Sansa came to join him for a drink.
"She certainly isn't demure. It seems fitting that their first children will be born of Winterfell since they never would have found the freedom to be together without these icy halls." Tyrion poured her a cup of wine.
"I'm happy things worked between them, I suspected things with Cersei would drag on longer than they did. I certainly never suspected he could kill her himself." Sansa said with little regard for what Tyrion may feel about his sister's death, not that it bothered him, but he knew she would have the same disrespect towards his brother.
"Arya relayed the story to us all. He tried to reason with her, but when she entered, and Cersei thought she was the maester, she told them to light the wildfire, and burn them all. The same thing the mad king said. As much as you hate my brother he has, and always will put himself at risk to save the people he protects." Tyrion looked very sad in that moment, Sans a frowned, she likes to imagine she was well informed, but her hatred for Jaime Lannister may have blinded her to parts of the story that didn't suit her opinion.
"What happened with the mad king, truly?" Sansa laid a hand on his arm, not sure if she meant to manipulate, or console him.
"He asked Jaime to kill his own father, and burn the city to the ground. He kept his oath until keeping it meant losing his soul. While we're on the subject of the things my brother has done to make you hate him, remember that when he attacked your father in the streets, that he did so because your mother had taken me prisoner for a crime I did not commit, and did all she could to execute me. The only thing he has ever done wrong is try to protect a family that didn't deserve his protection." They fell silent for a long time before they could move on to more pleasant topics.
When the Maester cleared everyone out, and Jaime found himself sat beside his Wife on clean sheets, holding his first born son he found it hard to believe. The four of them were together, healthy, and fed. The little boy in his arms had the bluest eyes he'd ever seen besides those of his wife.
"What should we call them?" Brienne whispered, her eyes heavy with exhaustion, but unable to look away from the boy swaddled in her arms
"I don't know, I was never allowed to name my children. We've thought of so many names, but now, all I can think is how fragile he looks." Jaime wished he had his other hand to strike the impossibly soft golden hair of his baby boy.
"I thought, perhaps Jonah after your mother, we certainly can't name them after your father." Brienne not her lip to try and stifle a laugh. Jaime beamed, looking over at the boy she held.
"Jonah, and Valen Lannister?" He looked up at her to see if she liked his choice, tears fell down her cheeks along the contours of her smile..
"Valen, a valiant Lannister, just like his father." She shifted towards him, and he pressed on for a kiss.
"Our sons are going to be unstoppable." Jaime let her lay her head on his shoulder to rest. He couldn't imagine anything more perfect than this moment with his family, where he could love them without shame, or fear. This is what it truly meant to have family, people he could trust. This was his heaven.