The Daughter of Tethras

Disclaimer: Don't own Dragon Age

A/N: Okay, so you know most everything is going to align with the game. The talk with Mother Giselle in this chapter is a little different, since obviously the doubts being cast and whatnot are less about religion than they are otherwise. It's still the same, and the same concept, just a tad more than her believing or not knowing whether to believe that she's the chosen savior to Andraste.

Chapter 17 (Rampant Doubts)

Bianca woke with a groan, hearing the advisors argue. She barely remembered getting back to them, but she remembered stumbling through the freezing blizzard to try and find her way back to camp. The time where she would have given up and let the weather kill her seemed so distant now, so she relied on her determination to find her way through the storm.

In her anguished state, all that she could hear had been the words Alexius said to her and the worlds that Corypheus told her. "You were a mistake. You never should have existed." She knew what her birth was like, a pregnancy that should never have occurred. She wanted to give up, but the thing that drove her forward was the final words of Chancellor Roderick.

"If we can survive this, then you could be no accident, you could be more."

"Did I really save anybody?" She tried to push herself up but a sharp pain in her side forced her to pause. It would take only a moment, but she didn't want to rush it. "Am I really that important to anyone? A mistake…an accident…Someone who never should have been born in the first place."

"What marks you as touched, I crafted to assault the very heavens." Corypheus's words haunted her, drawing greater fear into her heart. The mark on her hand wasn't a 'blessing' at all-not that she ever counted it as such. "And you used the Anchor to undo my work. The gall of it…"

"I didn't ask for it, take it if you want it!"

"Mortals have always cried this…I will not suffer even an unknowing rival, you must die."

"As if I needed more people trying to kill me. Maybe…maybe it would be better if I were gone."

A gentle hand caressed her upper back and she turned to see Mother Giselle looking down at her with a tiny smile. "We live because of you," Giselle whispered, "You are not a mistake, or is it not the mark that you speak of?" Bianca sniffed and furrowed her brow when a familiar floral scent drew her to it.

Her eyes followed to the source of the scent and she spotted a group of crystal grace flowers tied together. "Oh, my favorite flower." She started to reach, but Mother Giselle was faster in reaching across her and taking one of the flowers to bring to her. "I saw these all over the Hinterlands. I love them, they're so beautiful."

Next to the flowers was her battle ax. Oghren's words returned to her mind and she closed her eyes to draw in a quiet breath.

"Varric was worried about you, he brought those and said that you liked them. I believe he wishes you to live, as does everyone here." It relieved her a bit to know that her father was concerned for her, but this made her wonder if perhaps he truly did realize she was his daughter.

If so, then what could that mean for her she wondered.

With Corypheus's attack still fresh, she needed some idea where they were, and listening to her advisors fight wasn't helping. "Do you have any idea what happened to Corypheus?"

"I do not. It is possible he waits for another attack, but it is also possible he believes you are dead." Giselle looked to the advisors and took a deep breath. "Even still, I cannot know the mind of that creature, but only his effect on us. Does he concern you?"

"I had hoped the fight between the mages and Templars would be the end of this, that I could just-I don't know…" It felt more like the trouble was just beginning rather than ending, and all she ever wanted was just to have a normal life. "Tell me what to do."

"I can't do that. What else ails you? Is it Corypheus?"

"Him." She chuckled and threw her hand up into the air. "He's just another problem. Corypheus, Lantos, my adoptive parents, maybe even my birth mother." She growled and closed her fist tight, glaring down at her hand. "This stupid mark, anchor, or whatever the hell it is. All my life, all I've ever wanted was to be happy, and all I've ever got was shit after shit after shit! I'm sick of it…"

She leaned her head back, trembling with anger. "I don't know whether to give up, keep hoping all this is going to somehow work out or to start pointing fingers."

"When there is time to doubt, it can turn to blame." Giselle smiled warmly and reached for her closed hand. Bianca's grip loosened at the touch and she let out a shaky breath. "You have had a difficult upbringing, I understand, but you mustn't give up hope that one day…someday things will work out. If you give up, then you will never see that come to pass, but if you keep pushing for a better life-one that you can only dream of…it will become reality."

Even now with so many things keeping her from that 'reality', she was expected to be strong and to push. "I can't do it. I just…I can't." She ran her hands over her face and through her hair, groaning in frustration. "I can't be expected to be some magical, mythical savior when I need help myself."

"All your life you've gone alone, trying to fight your way into a better circumstance, but you've always fallen short-"

"Thanks for reminding me."

"But you don't have to go through it alone." Bianca looked towards the flowers, smiling gently as her father came to mind. "Maybe now is the time to stop being afraid?" She turned her eyes towards her advisors and forced herself to try and stand.

"I should help them plan."

"Take your rest, another voice won't help the matter, perhaps not yours. Whether you see yourself as a savior or not, our survivors are here because of what they saw. They watched you, their defender rise and fall, and then return to us."

"The other day, when Oghren came to visit, he said he was surprised I looked to him as a hero." Bianca glanced at the side and shrugged. "What you're saying?"

"A hero, a savior, is someone that impacts us. They do not have to see themselves as such, but if they believe it-in their eyes that would be enough."

"I just want to be normal, I just want a chance to live." Bianca raised the flower to her nose and took in the delightful aroma. "It's said dwarves don't dream, but when I was younger, I used to dream that I'd find my parents and that we'd be together."

"Is that not still possible?"

"I…don't know." She took a deep breath and let a nervous chuckle flee her lips. "Even if it was, even if my father wanted me around, there are so many things out there-people-making it incredibly difficult."

"Perhaps your father feels the same way. Perhaps now that we have a greater enemy, now is the time for you to talk with him."

There wasn't much time at all for talking and she knew that, but after what she experienced with Corypheus, she wanted to try. It wasn't so much confidence as it was exhaustion. "If he rejects me, I don't know what I'm going to do."

Giselle raised a hand beneath Bianca's chin, tilting her head up and gazing into her eyes. "You live." She shut her eyes and pulled away with a sigh. Giselle dropped her hands to her knees. "What if he doesn't?" Her eyes shot open and her heart skipped a beat. "You've spent so long being afraid that he would reject you, but have you considered the possibility that he would not? We both know your father, you've had time to know him through your travels, is his mind shut out or open?"

"Now that there's something else, what happens if we're torn apart again? The pain-"

"Every doubt that you say is an excuse." She threw her head up and opened her lips to protest against Giselle's words, but a jolt in her heart silenced her. Giselle was right, she was terrified so much of the pain that it sounded like she was simply grasping at reasons not to talk to her father. "Could there be a chance that he knows you are his daughter?"

"Then why hasn't he said anything?"

"Why have you not?"

A knowing smirk spread across Giselle's face and Bianca dropped her gaze to the ground. Her fingers curled around her belt and she bit down on her lower lip. "Because I'm terrified he's going to turn me away. I'm scared I was nothing more than a mistake…I know nothing about him, Mother Giselle, and that scares the hell out of me."

She took a deep breath. "It scares me more than Corypheus, more than Lantos, my adoptive parents or any monster we've faced." She stepped forward and swept her hand outwards, pointing towards Cassandra. "She refused to kill me when I begged her to. I lost the will to live, I didn't have that will to live when I came here because I thought for sure my father died at the Conclave…"

"And then you saw he was alive."

"Yeah…So I stayed." Her hands fell to her sides and her head started to bow. "If he turned me away, what else do I have left to live for? Even if we stop Corypheus, where would I go? Back to the damned Carta and Lantos? Back to Marcus and Amelia? Do I find my birth mother when she clearly wanted to get rid of me?"

Giselle said nothing, and Bianca's own frantic thoughts couldn't cover the echoing race of her heart. Tears welled up beneath her eyes as she closed up her hands. "I believe I can help these people, sure. Maybe I could." Her breathing grew shallow and she started to turn away. "Maybe I've still got some faith that my dad wants me and that we could be together after all this, but honestly? Is that even enough? Because no matter how much I want something to be true…the reality suggest otherwise. The reality suggests the world will sooner collapse before I'll ever come close to that dream. I truly want to believe, but doubt…it's all over the place…"

She started to approach her advisors, pausing to catch her breath. Her hands slid to her hips and her head shook left and right. Behind her she heard singing and looked back to see Giselle walking up to her.

Shadows fall, and hope has fled. Steel your heart, the dawn will come…The night is long and the path is dark, look to the sky for one day soon, the dawn will come.

Bianca raised an eyebrow and her lips separated, but before she could question the song she heard Leliana beginning to join in followed by Cullen, and soon the entire camp was moved by Giselle's song.

The Shepherd's lost and home is far, keep to the stars the dawn will come. The night is long and the path is dark, look to the sky for one day soon, the dawn will come.

Bare your blade and raise it high, stand your ground the dawn will come…

Her chest trembled and a chuckle fell from her lips as the song resonated within her, soothing her. She wiped away the moisture in her eyes and turned as Giselle spoke one last time.

"Faith is only made stronger by facing doubt, Bianca. Untested, it is nothing…"

Solas walked up behind her, requesting her presence. She nearly jumped out of her skin when he did, but she followed him. "Don't sneak up behind me like that, Solas."

"I apologize." He lit a lamp and she stepped next to it. "Are you alright? Mother Giselle is a wise woman."

"Yes. I like her."

Solas smiled at her and then looked off to the distance. "Well first things first." His shoulders dropped and his eyes narrowed. "I should discuss the orb which Corypheus had, the one in which you touched that gave you the Anchor."

"Oh."

"It is Elvin." Her heart sank and she looked down at the scarred palm of her hand. "There may actually be a way to remove that mark, but there are more pressing matters to deal with." She curled her hand and closed her eyes.

"Right." If there was a way to get rid of the anchor, she would more than love to find out, but for now it was needed to close the rifts around Thedas. As much as she hated it, she could live with it for the time being. "How do you know about it?"

"It's called a foci, something I've seen in the fade. It is an ancient magic."

"Oh. Magic. Of course it's magic."

He frowned and his piercing gaze grew soft. "I am sorry, I know how you feel about magic. I am afraid I cannot offer much comfort…If anyone learns of the origin of this device, it could threaten what little alliance the elven people have with the Inquisition."

"It won't really matter if we're freezing here in the middle of nowhere."

"Yes, but that's what I wished to speak with you about." She raised her head up and pulled the corners of her lips back into her cheeks. "There is a place where the Inquisition can rebuild, it's strong and sturdy…up north, we can reach it soon."

"What is this place?"

"It is a place called Skyhold, an ancient fortress that has stood the test of time. It is more than capable." Her heart skipped and excitement washed over the ache in her body. "I've spoken to Cassandra about it, and the advisors wish to depart soon, so there is not much time before we have to leave…"

"Okay?"

"Use what little time we have." Solas looked away to the right and Bianca followed his gaze, tensing when she saw Varric standing by a campfire in the distance. "He has driven himself crazy with worry, perhaps now is the time to talk to him." She started to whine, but swallowed the urge. "As for the Anchor and it's magic, perhaps your father is the one who can offer some comfort."

"Wait." Her eyes widened and she snapped her gaze up to him. "You know? How-"

"Does it matter? The advisors wish to leave as soon as possible, speak to him before they call to you. It will be your final opportunity before reaching Skyhold."

"I don't want to have a rushed conversation with my father, Solas. Especially not when there's still a chance he may turn me away-he might not even know he has a kid!"

"So ask. If you had only the time for one question, what would it be?"

"I…" She watched Varric's head turn and saw his gaze fall onto her. The man's shoulders rose and his mouth curved up a small bit.

Bianca forced away the doubts in her mind with a deep breath and began walking towards him, knowing that if she spent any longer talking to Solas, she would simply become too fearful again to try.

"How are you?" Varric asked once she reached the campfire. His expression was warm and comforting, and he seemed to be more relaxed than she was expecting. "It's good to see you're awake."

"Thanks. Mother Giselle said you left the crystal grace over there. You were worried?"

"Of course." He closed his eyes and growled. "First Alexius, now Corypheus. Corypheus, of all the people to run into, of all the things to go after you, Corypheus."

"You…know him?"

"Yes." Varric opened his eyes and turned towards her, casting an apologetic look on her. "He shouldn't even be alive. Thane, Aveline, Bethany and I-we…" He ran his hand over his head and started to groan. "He almost killed you."

"That…" She could hear Cassandra in the distance, calling for her. It was almost time to go and she was going to have to put all her focus on guiding the survivors to this Skyhold place. "That's something that can be discussed later, I think."

"Yeah."

If you had time for only one question, what would it be?

Bianca's mouth grew tight and her eyebrows closed together. Varric had his arms crossed and was looking now at the fire below. "Varric, I need to ask you something, but we have to leave. Solas said there's a place we can go, a place this Inquisition thing can grow."

"Okay."

"But, I have time. I just-I need to ask this." Fear gripped her heart and she watched him turn his head to her. The trip to Skyhold was going to be hell if he turned her away now, but if she didn't get this over with, she may never do so.

"Ask me anything you like, I will answer as honestly as I can." She held her breath and looked into his eyes. They were calm and warm, but also held a hint of pain that she couldn't place.

Cassandra and the advisors approached from behind, and with them were several of the survivors. Varric raised his hand to them and they remained back, staying just out of earshot.

"Here goes." She released her breath and braced herself. She knew the answer to the first question, but it would tell her whether or not he knew and whether or not he wanted anything to do with her. "Are you…my father, and do you regret me?"

Varric's eyes grew and he unfolded his arms. "Regret? No…god no." Her heart rose up and she stumbled forward, shocked by the answer. "And yes, I am your father." He placed his hands on her shoulders and looked into her eyes as if gazing into her doubt filled heart. "I have never thought of you as a mistake."

Tears ran along her cheeks and she gasped out when he hugged her. There were more questions she had for him, and so much more that she wanted to say, but she was at a loss for words and a loss for time.

"We can discuss this later," he said, "When we have more time to talk. Okay?" Still unable to speak, she answered with a tearful nod. Relief flooded her veins and her knees started to cave. She was angry with herself for being afraid for so long, but now that she had her answer, she hardly had the energy to complain-much less to move.

So it's finally happened, and they can start to relax. Oh by the way, Corypheus may have more reason to go after them as well. You'll see why. SO what do you think, seeing this chapter? About time she and Varric got to the reveal, right?