~If It Kills Me~
Kim's POV:
After I heard Jack and his band pretty much take the whole school down, my ears were ringing. They played The Kill by 30 Seconds to Mars. Jack is a really awesome on stage. Same for Jasper, Jerry, Mike and Emmett. I walk over to my punch bug. I slide into my car. I stick the key in engine. I turn the key. It rumbles several times and stops. Not again. If it breaks down again my dad won't have enough money for the bills. I rest my head on the wheel. I close my eyes. I need help.
"God give me strength."
I open my eyes and try again.
"Come on."
I mumble. I turn the key again harder than before.
"Come on."
It roars louder but doesn't starts. My dad is going to have to pick me up. I text my dad, telling him to come pick me up at school. I sit on the curb, close to the school's front doors just in case. The music jams from inside hurting my ears. Can't they just turn it down a little?
Cat is still in there .I couldn't find her though. She must be talking to her other friends. Or dealing with some problem with the dance. I only have her. Maybe Jack…..
Oh please. What am I thinking? He's all hot and sexy and I'm the one in a child's costume with rabbit ears. I snatch the rabbit hat off of my head. My hair falls on my shoulders, mostly on my back. Jack doesn't seem interested in me anyway. His type is probably a girl who wears expensive clothes and can actually talk to him without daydreaming about his name. Really Kim? His name? I made a complete foul of myself in front of him.
It's not like I care about his opinion or anything. Cause I don't. I put my head in my hands. I mutter
"He's not even here and he's getting on your last nerves."
I look around the parking lot, expecting to see my ride fly from the heavens. My dad must be stuck at work again. Sighing, I get off the curb. When I get close to the express way a cold breeze makes me shiver. Rain pours out of now where making me almost freeze to death. I feel like a man with no home, nothing. Right when I was going to give up my superman comes to save the day. You guessed it. Not very shocking is it?
He grins as wide as possible.
"Looks like someone needs a ride."
He says trying as hard to annoy me. I glance at his rusted, jacked up truck. {Cause his name is Jack. Never mind} Dents and dirt pretty much cover the whole truck.
"I can say the same for you Anderson."
I say trying as hard as he does.
"Do you want a ride or not Crawford?"
He says annoyed with me.
"Whatever."
Shrugging my shoulders, as if it is nothing, I hop into his truck. The leather seat is as stiff as a new mattress. He starts up the truck. He is wearing a white undershirt and some black skinny jeans, some DC shoes. His bangs fall into his eyes hiding them from everything else. He waves his hand in my face.
"What?"
"Take a picture it'll last longer."
I can tell his grin gets wider. I roll my eyes ignoring his comment. I notice were still in the same place.
"Can you take me home?"
I set my elbow on the arm rest by my window.
"I kind of need directions."
"Damn it."
I mumble.
"Chill out Crawford. Just tell me your street."
"Aspen 9205."
"Where the fuck is that?"
He is really pissing me off.
"It's right next to it's a country street and drive!"
"Geez Crawford you have a temper."
He pulls out of the parking lane.
"Well I only have a temper when people really piss me off."
I say, hinting he is pissing me off.
"Oh yeah who?"
He glances at me at a red light. I ignore his comment. I look out the window watching the houses roll by. He gets on 64 and drives down some streets close by my house. He stops at a stop sign.
"Which way?"
"Left. Then three rights. Then go straight."
A few minutes after silence Jack breaks it.
"We should get to know each other better."
My eyes get wide at his comment. I turn in his direction shocked.
"Wait what?"
He pulls over on the side of the road, focusing on me.
"Are you death?"
I whack him hard on the shoulder.
"I'm not death. I'm just shocked you would ask me that."
"Why is that?"
He says rubbing his shoulder.
"Uh…..well…you're….you….and…..I'm…..me."
I mumble.
"In English?"
I really just want to squeeze his neck until his head pops off. I use gestures.
"You're that….."
I gesture to how he looks.
"…..and I'm me."
I gesture to myself holding a bunny rabbit hat and these stupid socks.
"Why does it matter?"
I fumble with my fingers.
"I don't know."
He sighs starting the truck again. It looks like he really wanted to get to know me. I lean on the arm rest.
"Where now?"
"Left, three rights and then straight. My house is the last one."
I say half a sleep. My eyes slowly close. I flicker them open determined to stay awake. They slowly close again. This process keeps going for about 2 minutes. I finally let sleep control me. My eyes close with the sound of the cars rolling past in the distance.
Jack's POV:
I turn left. Three rights. Then go straight as Kim said. The road is empty ahead of me and behind me. I glance at Kim a few times. Her eyes slowly close. Someone's sleepy. After about five minutes of driving straight. My phone rings. My phone says 'Dad'. I answer it.
"What?"
"Where are you? You didn't come home a couple nights ago! How do I know where you are?"
"First I'm driving Kim home….."
Before I finish he starts cussing me out. He is either drunk or….he's drunk.
"Get here when you're done or or…."
"Or what?!"
I provoke him. He is silent.
"Are you just going to chain me to a tree again like I'm a bad person?! You made me a bad person! Or are you going to take away that I'm king?! Can't take away that can you?"
Silence.
"I knew it. I'll come back when you treat me evenly with the others. Just because I'm the youngest doesn't mean I can be tossed around like a piece of trash, you don't even care if I die trying to kill this girl! Well guess what? Kill her yourself!"
I slam the decline button. A crack appears on my screen. Great! I slam my phone on the dashboard. Not caring if it's broken. Kim shifts her position. She leans on my shoulder. She must've been having a bad dream or something. She might've even heard my conversation with dad. Great. My first mission and I blow it. Vampires suck. I start driving down the road.
Kim says something in her sleep. Sniffles come from her. Is she having a nightmare or something? Kim jerks up like a deer in headlights. She breathes heavily as if something scared her. I put my hand on her shoulder. She winces at my touch. She moves away a little from my reach. She looks up at me, pure helpless fear. She must be dreaming about when he mother died.
"Are you ok?"
No answer.
"Bad dream?"
I ask. Tears slowly go down her cheeks. She wipes them away with the sleeve of her sweater. She blushes then looks down embarrassed.
"No."
"Nightmare?"
Tears swell up in her eyes again. Without asking she lays her head on my chest for comfort.
"I'm fine. Just take me home. Please. Please Jack. Please."
She muffles in my shirt. I put my arm tightly around her and start driving towards a small house in a large field. I drive down the gravel driveway to the house. I pull as close as possible so she doesn't have to walk that far. I look down at her.
"Kim?"
She falls asleep fast. I open the door. She got tears on my shirt. How cute. I pick her up bridal style out of the truck. The door is unlocked for the front door. I walk in, holding Kim.
The first room looks like a living room. A soft couch sets up against the wall, a fire place on the far side, and a flat screen TV between two windows, and a coffee table between the couch and flat screen. I don't see any staircase to other rooms so I walk into the next room.
The next room is the kitchen. Your usual kitchen things in here. I walk into the next room. It looks like it's her dads. A flat screen mantled to the wall. King sized bed, laptop on large desk, and a closet. I find a door in the hallway. I swing open the door, being as gentle as possible with Kim. A stair case goes down stairs. This must be her room.
I walk down stairs. A aqua blue color is painted on the walls, a queen sized bed side against the wall, a large dresser, a flat screen but smaller than the others, a pure white desk with school supplies, magazines, and a laptop scattered over it, and a smaller closet than her dad's is across from the bed. I gently set her down on her bed. I pull the covers up to her shoulders for warmth.
Kim shifts a little getting comfortable. I pull her bangs back, kissing her forehead. Her face blushes after I do. I chuckle. Man if I wasn't a vampire and if she wasn't a werewolf. We would already be dating and a couple. I walk back upstairs. I close the front door behind me.
Once I get back in my car I realize something. I did all that because I care. I didn't do it for the mission or being a pervert, or anything I really do care.
'Don't fall in love with the fresh meat'
Well he's going to have to get over because I'm already falling. I'm pretty sure she's falling too.
Kim's POV:
"Kim?!"
I turn onto the other side of my bed ignoring the calls. I am so freaking sore right now.
"Kim?!"
I force myself to get out of bed, shoving the covers on the floor. Not even bothering to pick them up. I step over the covers walking up stairs. On my alarm clock it say 9:54 but like I need it. I got a forty year old man right here screaming my name to wake up. I swing open the door narrowly missing my dad's face. He gives me a look. I follow him into the kitchen. I fix myself a bowl of corn pops.
"Where's your car?"
He says eating his Captain Crunch.
"At school."
I drown my corn pops in the milk. They float back up soggy and lifeless.
"Why is your car at school?"
"It broke down again."
I mumble. We barely can afford this house and we can barely afford to fix the car again. He sighs heavily.
"I can get a job at Party City, they're hiring."
"No I'm going to work third shift again tonight. I better get some rest."
"But you just woke up."
"I need energy Kim."
He kisses me on the forehead. He walks back to his room. After eating my cereal I wash out my dad's and my bowl. I walk down stairs and to get dressed. My phone buzzes on my bed. I swipe it up checking the text from Cat. Who else would it be?
"Hey you want to go on a double date tonight?'
She always tries to hook me up. I like being single. You have more time for other things than kissing and flirty texts. I quickly text her back.
'With who?'
My phone buzzes after like 10 seconds. I check the text.
'I'm going with Jerry and Jerry convinced Jack to come. You guys are going to be so cute together! :D'
My heart beats a little faster. I reread the text and see the word 'convinced'. He must not want to go. Maybe he does because Cat overreacts some times. I text her back.
'Okay I'll go what time and place?'
'I can't pick you up because I have to watch my brothers and sisters right before, but Jack can come to pick you up around 9:00. He'll drive you to Strike & Spare and we'll meet outside. I'm riding with Jerry. Maybe we can do something after.'
My heart beats faster. I text her back.
'I'll get ready around 8:15 pm. I have to go get a job at Party City.'
When she doesn't text back she must be hanging out with other friends. Well I like being a lone wolf. I can think about myself. Myself nobody else but me. I get dressed. {On my profile}. I brush my hair and put on a little makeup. I have to look good right? I run outside and hop onto my bike. Putting on my helmet I glance around. It's a nice day, not too hot not too cold. I pedal down the street, taking a shortcut to town. If I get on the express riding this, I'm road kill.
Once I get to town nearly nobody is driving. Maybe a couple cars going back and forth but no 50 cars with stressed people honking and yelling out their cars. I jump onto the sidewalk dodging joggers and skateboarders. I ride into the Party City parking lot. While I'm chaining my bike to the rack a familiar red truck pulls in by me. I know those dents and dirt anywhere. The boy steps out with a shocked face.
"Kim what are you doing here?"
I look like a stalker.
"I was about to ask you the same question."
He rolls his eyes. He points to his shirt.
"I work here."
Well now I look like a stalker who's a dumbass.
"Oh you do?"
I say walking towards the door. He locks his truck and follows me inside.
"Yeah anything you need help with?"
He says walking behind the counter. I put my arms on the corner, fiddling with my thumbs.
"I need a job."
I watch a fly bounce on the window trying to get inside for a piece of a cake. He slides over a pen and a piece of paper that says on the top 'Employee Registration Form' in big bold letters.
"Don't I need to take to the manager?"
He leans over the table grinning.
"I know for a fact if the manager knew you he would've already have given you the job."
I feel my cheeks turn pink. To keep from hiding me blushing I grab the pen and paper. After about 15 minutes I hand back the paper and pen. Jack looks up from stacking paper plates on shelves. He walks over into the manager's office. I wait in a plastic chair by the door. When Jack walks out it was at least 8 minutes in there. Jack has his hands behind his back clearly hiding something.
"What did he say?"
Jack stands in front of me with no expression.
"Well…he said…."
"I got the job?"
I say getting up.
He looks at the ground. He glances at me. A grin forms on his face.
"You got the job!"
"I got the job?"
He shows the t-shirt from behind him.
"Yeah you got the job!"
Some people in the store stop and stare at us screaming and jumping in excitement. The weirdest most awkwardness thing happens. Jack, still holding the shirt, grabs my cheeks and kisses me. I was about to scream
"OMFG!"
It was the best kiss I've had. And my first kiss. But it was Amazing! Like I didn't hold back or anything but the manager's door opens and he cuts into it.
"Jack Anderson what is this…"
We break apart as quickly as we can. We both take two steps away from each other. He manager raises his eyebrows.
"Is this going to be a problem?"
We glance at each other. I answer.
"No sir…."
I glance at his name tag. Rudy Davis. {I decided to use him after all.}
"….Mr. Davis."
He walks to me. He doesn't look old. Around his thirties. He looks good for his age pretty short; I'm pretty much his size. He doesn't look anywhere near a bodybuilder but that doesn't matter at Party City.
"Just call me Rudy. Now the truck just got here with Halloween and Thanksgiving balloons and decorations, I will suggest you restock the shelves before blowing up any balloons. I'll be in my office."
He walks back into his office. He screams something but I could only make out the words 'Tip-tip'. Must be a cat. I look at Jack. He walks back to shelving plastic plates. I slip my work shirt over my shirt. Pulling my hair out between the two shirts I run over to Jack.
Jack's POV:
Okay I did not know Kim was going to get a job here. Yeah it looks like that to her really I just need this job to get away from my dad and Jason. Dad has been making me train until I was about to get killed, literally. Jason is ignoring me and he won't even stay in the same room as me. I don't want to be king anyway. He can have it!
I didn't know what I was doing when I kissed Kim. One I was doing it in excitement and two I really wanted to kiss her. She didn't look like she was holding back. Was she? I sigh and walk over to setting the plastic plates on the shelves while Kim and Rudy talk.
The turkeys on the plates with their own pilgrim hats did even make me smile. I keep shelving. Out of the corner of my eye Kim slips on the shirt over her other one, pulling her hair out between them. She runs over. She sits down next to me shelving the plates. When she stops and looks at her shoes I look at her. She says
"Should we talk about 'it'?"
'It' is meaning the kiss.
"Only if you want to."
Silence.
I quickly shelve the plates in order.
"We should go get those boxes."
I say awkwardly, standing up. She stands up after me. We both grab two boxes. Without talking I take off the tape and empty the boxes. Without talking Kim puts the things on shelves in the right place and throws the empty boxes in the recycling bin.
After at least 9 and a half hour of work we took all the stuff off of the shelves and put the up to date stuff on the shelves. When Kim goes to the bathroom Rudy comes up to me.
"Jack I've noticed you've been…"
He stops. I answer for him.
"Not myself."
"You can put that way but what is between you guys?"
I tab the top of my water bottle.
"We are…"
I see past Rudy where Kim walks out. When she walks over I change the subject.
"And that's how I got it stuck in the vacuum."
Kim gives me a disgusted look.
"Do I really want to know?"
"Not really."
Rudy says, like he actually heard the whole story. Rudy changes the subject.
"Anyway can you guys close up I'm going to Utah."
"Why are you going to Utah?"
Kim asks.
"I have to go to my uncle's wedding."
"Aw who is he getting married to?"
I ask.
"I don't know."
Shrugging, he throws me the keys to the store.
"Don't forget to blow up balloons!"
He leaves in his orange Mustang. Living the life. No kids. I feel like Jerry, Jasper and Mike are my kids. Kim walks over and grabs a handful of random colored balloons. I pick up an orange and Kim picks up a black one. I start blowing up the balloon. When I'm done I tie it to a balloon string. I let it go. It bumps on the top of the ceiling, circling above me. I glance at Kim who hasn't blown a balloon yet.
"You okay?"
I say worried. All because of that kiss. My fault.
"Yeah."
She starts blowing up a balloon. Some sinking feeling makes me know I know she's not.
"I know you're not."
I blurt out, unexpected for myself too. Kim stops blowing up the balloon, holding it with her thumb and index finger.
"How do you know? I'm fine."
"I don't know but you're not."
She stays silent. The only noise is a fly buzzing around the window looking for a way out.
"This is about the kiss. Right?"
I ask. I look at her.
"Yup. And we have a date with Cat and Jerry…."
She looks at her watch
"…..in 30 minutes."
Silence.
"Okay if I blow up the balloons and you tie them to the string we can get this done faster."
I say, hoping she'll agree.
"Okay."
After about 6 minutes we have done 23 black balloons, 12 orange, 8 yellow, and 16 brown. We set them around the store for the decorations if anyone wants balloons for these holidays. Kim turns off all the light and I make sure the back doors are locked. I get to the front oor before Kim. I open the door for her. When she notices her cheeks turn pink.
"Are you going in or out Crawford?"
She rolls her eyes, her cheeks still pink
"You're such a gentleman Anderson."
When she walks out she gives me a hard punch in the stomach. I chuckle.
"Nice punch."
I shove her shoulder lightly. She jumps on her bike.
"Thanks Anderson."
"You're welcome Crawford."
We look at each other for like 1 minute. Kim breaks he silence.
"Well I got to get home to get ready."
She slowly starts pedaling towards her house.
"Wait Kim."
I catch up with her. She stops and turns around.
"Yeah?"
"Why don't I drive you?"
She smiles and bites her lip.
"Sure."
She gets off and starts to put her bike in the bike. I stop in front of her.
"I got it."
"Anderson I got it."
I step up closer to her. I put my hands over her hers on the bike.
"I got it."
She lets go.
"You're not winning the next round."
"We'll just see about that Crawford."
I use a rope to tie her bike securely in the back of the truck. Hopping in, I turn on the car. When I pull out I turn up the radio. {I was just skimming through YouTube and chosen to listen to this. This is the best song for this chapter. You're welcome}.If it Kills me by Jason Mraz. Out of thousands of songs in the world this one happens to come on at this very moment. Even though I feel like this song is about what I'm going though, I tab my fingers on the wheel, glancing at Kim one or twice. Three times. She taps her fingers on the arm rest to the beat of the song. I keep up with her and the song. We look at each other. We start singing the lyrics together like crazy people.
"Hello, tell me you know, yeah, you've figured me out
Something gave it away
And it would be such a beautiful moment to see the look on your face
To know that I know that you know now"
We smile and laugh between the lyrics.
"And baby that's a case of my wishful thinking
You know nothing
'Cause you and I, why we go carrying on for hours on end
We get along much better than you and your boyfriend" {Like Kim and Garret}
I can relate to that. I swear I thought Kim blushed when I sang "We get along much better than you and your boyfriend"
"Well, all I really want to do is love you
A kind much closer than friends use
But I still can't say it after all we've been through"
We both roll the windows down and sing loud for people to hear.
"And all I really want from you is to feel me
As the feeling inside keeps building
And I will find a way to you if it kills me, if it kills me"
I pull on the street her house is. We keep singing.
"Well, how long can I go on like this, wishing to kiss you?
Before I rightly explode
And this double life I lead isn't healthy for me in fact it makes me nervous
If I get caught I could be risking it all"
I could really be risking it all with Kim here, in my truck, no more than two inches away, singing this song with me.
"Well, baby there's a lot that I miss in case I'm wrong
All I really want to do is love you
A kind much closer than friends use
But I still can't say it after all we've been through"
I really want to blurt out "All I really want to do is love you."
"And all I really want from you is to feel me
As the feeling inside keeps building
And I will find a way to you if it kills me, if it kills me"
We pull onto her long driveway.
"If I should be so bold, I'd ask you to hold my heart in your hand
Tell you from the start how I've longed to be your man
But I never said a word I guess I'm going to miss my chance again"
I'm going to miss my chance.
"Well, all I really want to do is love you
A kind much closer than friends use
But I still can't say it after all we've been through"
I glance at Kim, cheerfully singing.
"And all I really want from you is to feel me
As the feeling inside keeps building
And I will find a way to you if it kills me, if it kills me
I think it might kill me"
I pull up close to the door so she won't have to walk that far.
"And all I really want from you is to feel me
It's a feeling inside that keeps building
And I will find a way to you if it kills me, if it kills me
It might kill me"
I'm going to miss my chance my brain reminds me. Kim grabs her purse and starts to get out. I think fast and grab her shoulder. {My heart was beating so fast when I was writing this. Not kidding}. She turns around, putting her purse done beside her.
"Yeah Jack?"
I turn off the truck. I slide closer to her and pull her bangs out of her face. I put our fore heads together. She doesn't have an expression. I whisper.
"Please let me do this. Just once."
"What are you…?"
I cut her off. I brush my nose against hers. I put my lips to hers. She puts her hands on my shoulders/chest. I put my hands on her waist.
I hope with all my heart she likes this.
Kim's POV:
Best day ever.
I enjoyed with all my energy writing this. Please comment below.