Unshakable Love
The following morning Severus woke and went to go about his usual routine, that is until a frantic Twinkle appeared before him as he sat on the edge of his bed wearing black pajama pants and a grey t-shirt. "What is it this time, Twinkle?" Severus grumbled since he had yet to even have his coffee that morning and already the insane house elf was already in hysterics. At first the elf was just babbling, so Severus tried to catch key words in what the elf was yelling, something he was sure had woken Lily and Harry if they were not already awake. Though when several minutes passed with the elf still rambling, Severus slightly lost his temper and yelled. "Twinkle!" he yelled causing the elf to finally fall silent. "What exactly are you going off about?" he demanded as the small house elf stared up at him with her wide hazel eyes in stunned silence for a few seconds before speaking.
"Mistress has taken ill!" Twinkle suddenly cried out frantically. "Twinkle moved Master Harry to the couch, but Mistress is fitful." Tinkle said as tears began to fall from her large eyes. "Mistress cries out in pain but Twinkle cannot help her." The small elf said as at hearing that, Severus was up and rushing from his room with the elf quick on his heels.
"Go alert Madame Pomfrey that I am bringing Lily to the Hospital Wing and then you are to come back and not let Harry out of your sight!" he ordered as the small elf nodded only to vanish with a pop as Severus pushed open the door to Lily and Harry's room to find his daughter on the bed convulsing. "Lily!" Severus said in shock as he rushed over and went to hold Lily down so that she would not end up falling off of the bed as she seemed to be having a fit. Though it seemed that his yelling had gotten Harry's attention as he was soon at the door staring in, wide eyed behind his round glasses.
"What is wrong with her?" he asked in worry as Severus turned and reluctantly moved away from Lily who was still convulsing but he had quickly cast a small charm to insure she would remain on the bed and not fall off.
"Go back to the living room!" Severus ordered as the look on his face seemed to frighten the small boy before him, all due to how Harry turned and ran from the doorway back toward the living room as fast as he could. With Harry back where he belonged, Severus removed the charm from the bed Lily was on as she was suddenly still as her skin was far paler than usual as he feared the worst only to see she was still breathing from the gentle rise and fall of her chest. "Lily…" he whispered as he carefully gathered the frail form of his daughter in his arms and held her close to his chest relieved that she seemed to be alright, or as alright as could be after what appeared to be near like a seizure.
"Dad…" a small voice called as Severus felt immense relief as he shifted so that he was supporting Lily while holding her where he could look down at her face. Her face was worn and her eyes only half open as though she was about to fall asleep or fighting doing so. "W-what is wrong with me…?" she whispered as Severus found himself unable to answer, more so when he saw something in her eyes. Small flecks of amber scattered through her usually shinning blue eyes. "Please…" she whispered as her eyes drifted closed as she was limp in her father's arms.
"Lil?" Severus whispered only for her to not respond as he began to panic even at seeing how she was still breathing. "Lil…open your eyes!" he pleaded since he was praying he had not seen the small bits of amber in her eyes since that tended to hint at a certain illness but he did not want to think that was possible. Though after a few moments of desperately trying to get Lily to respond, Twinkle appeared with a faint pop and bowed low before Severus who was still cradling his unconscious daughter to his chest.
"Twinkle did as Master instructed. Madame Pomfrey is expecting Master Severus and Mistress Lily." Twinkle said as Severus stood from the bed and placed Lily down and looked toward Twinkle.
"Watch her for a moment." He ordered as he rushed back to his room as he quickly changed, not wishing to deal with any students he may come across if they saw him in the corridor in his pajamas. Once he was in his usual attire of all black, he rushed back to Lily and Harry's room to find Twinkle attempting to calm Lily who was bunched into a ball as Severus rushed over to her and knelt beside the bed as Twinkle moved back. "Lily!" Severus called to her as she slowly looked toward him, there was now more amber in her blue eyes, where it was almost half amber in both. "I am going to take you to the hospital wing." He said as he picked her up only for Lily to go into another fit, where Severus had to struggle just to keep a hold of her before she was calm again only for Severus to hear the small voice of his daughter.
"Dad…it hurts…" she whispered weakly as Severus looked down not seeing any injury, but feeling that she was tense but limp at the same time. "Something is inside me…" she said looking up at the concerned, near frightened face of her father as she was struggling to not go into another fit. "Please…make it stop…" Lily pleaded as Severus held her close as he rushed from the room ordering Twinkle to put Harry back to bed as he was out of their quarters in a rush and running up to the hospital wing holding Lily close as she went into another fit in his arms.
"Hold on, Lily. We are almost to the hospital wing." He whispered praying that his daughter would be alright as when they go to the doors to the hospital wing, Lily was limp in his arm, breathing weakly. No sooner had Severus opened the door and stepped in, Madame Pomfrey was rushing across the wing toward him indicating to the bed he was to put Lily on. Though no sooner had he put her down, her body seized up as Madame Pomfrey rushed to give Lily a dreamless sleep potion which only took a few seconds to take effect as the small child was still on the bed besides the gentle rise and fall of her chest.
"Has this ever happened before?" Madame Pomfrey asked eyeing the potions master as he looked beyond frantic as he stared down at his daughter's pale face only to reach out and brush some of her black hair out of her face. The only answer that Severus was able to give was a slight shake of his head due to how Lily in the whole time she had been his, had never once had anything like a seizure. Which was his guess on what was happening, but he was at a loss for the cause since the amber in her eyes had seemed to increase with each one before she had been put into an all but unconscious state from the dreamless sleep potion.
"I just know that the house elf who helps me with taking care of her and Harry barged into my room and told me that something was wrong with Lily and her eyes were gradually turning more and more amber…" he said after a few moments when he managed to find his voice again.
Madame Pomfrey gave Severus a worried look before she turned on her heel as she spoke saying for him to stay put, not that he needed to be told. Because there was no way he would leave his daughter's side. Even if he had to sit there all night. Though he had taken a seat on a stiff chair beside the bed that Lily was on as he watched her while she was almost unnaturally still, not even realizing the two that were approaching until he heard the voice of the headmaster near the foot of the bed.
"Severus, we need to talk…" was all that the older wizard said only for Severus to glare at him in a way that conveyed that he was not about to leave Lily alone when he did not know what was wrong with her. Though the headmaster was not going to accept even a glare conveying something like that. "Now, so that I can explain to you what is wrong with Lily and how you can help her since we have only a few hours at best to be able to help her before what is wrong with her destroys her from the inside." The headmaster said as Severus glanced back to Lily for a brief second before standing to follow Dumbledore from the hospital wing to his office. It felt like it took far longer than usual, something that Severus was sure was due to how at the moment he was wishing to just turn around and run back to the hospital wing to be with his daughter, but he knew at the moment deep down that the best way to help her was to hear Dumbledore out.
Not long after, but it felt like an eternity to Severus, they were walking into the office of the headmaster as Dumbledore motioned for Severus to take a seat. After hesitating, Severus did so as Dumbledore went over to a cabinet to get out the pensieve from within and carry it back over to the desk and set it down. "I believe it will be easier to show you rather than tell you what is wrong with Lily." Dumbledore said as he saw how Severus was about to ask why he had gotten out the pensieve. A second later, Dumbledore was placing the tip of his wand to his temple and pulling out four silver strands, one at a time before placing them down into the smooth surface. "Come." He said as Severus stood and walked over closer.
"How is this going to help Lily?" Severus asked giving Dumbledore an annoyed look but the calm look on the older man's face conveyed that he was sure that this would actually lead to finding out what could help Lily. So with only a faint amount of hesitation Severus placed his face down closer to the surface only to feel like the office lurched forward sending him down into the liquid, down into the first memory that Dumbledore had placed in the pensieve. After a brief fall through the liquid, Severus righted himself as his feet found the ground, only for him to find that he was in a house, one that he had never seen, but it was plain, more plain than the simple home that he had lived in with Lily before he had also taken custody of Harry. Severus glanced around only hear someone approaching as he turned to see Dumbledore, but he could tell that this one was not the one he had been speaking to a moment before, so he merely fell into step behind the Dumbledore in the memory.
He walked up the stairs as a young boy with jet black hair that framed his face and round blue eyes staring out from behind a few locks of hair that fell into his face. Even though it was a younger version of a current student, Severus knew that it was Levi Lupin, the biggest trouble maker he had ever had the misfortune to teach.
Though he did not get to reflect on that for very long due to how Dumbledore from the memory smiled and spoke to the young boy. "Hello, Levi." He said in a kind voice before glancing around as the boy spoke a greeting as well before Dumbledore continued. "Your father contacted me, saying that he and your mother wished to speak to me?" he asked only for an older male to come from the kitchen and rush forward and shake hands with Dumbledore. One who Severus knew instantly as Remus Lupin, one of the gang that had made Severus' life a living hell during school.
"Professor, thank you so much for coming!" Remus said in a relieved tone as he released Dumbledore's hand as his blue eyes showed nothing but relief. He looked the same as Severus remembered, a little more worn, but still the same sickly looking Remus.
'What does he have to do with my daughter?' Severus thought as he stayed close to those from the memory to hear what was being said.
"Of course, and I am no longer your professor, so you do not need to call me as such." Dumbledore said with a smile as Remus shook his head.
"Old habits die hard." He said nervously before there was a soft voice from behind Remus only for him to turn and rush to the woman's side, one that Severus stared at in shock. She was the girl that he and Lily Evans had visited with in their youth, one of the only muggles where they grew up that had loved being around Severus and Lily despite them being different. Elizabeth…but her last name escaped Severus at the moment.
"Liz, you should be laying down." Remus fussed as he went to help steady Elizabeth as she shook her head as her grown out black hair cascaded about her frail looking shoulders. "But you need to for not just your sake but also our unborn child…" Remus spoke as Severus stared in shock taking in that an old child hood friend was actually what seemed to be eight or near nine months along with child, but something was not right. She looked beyond weak, her skin taut so that her cheek bones were far more defined, and her skin paler, almost as though she were ill.
"I am fine, Remus." Elizabeth said softly with a worn smile before she looked toward Dumbledore and smiled softly before turning to her young son who was tugging at her hand. "Levi, why don't you go play while your father and I have a talk with Professor Dumbledore." She suggested in her soft voice as Levi kept his eyes on his mother as though searching for something before he nodded and went up the nearby stairs. It was not until they heard a door close upstairs that Elizabeth spoke again. "He may be young, but he can already see that this pregnancy is taking a toll…" she said in a soft voice as Remus moved to help support her as he guided her toward the living room and helped her to sit down on the couch. While he had been doing that, Dumbledore had walked into the room and sat down on one of the arm chairs facing the others while Severus stood not too far from the older wizard.
"So, it seems that it is true." Dumbledore said in a grave tone, his blue eyes lacking their usual twinkle as they regarded the frail looking Elizabeth. "The child you carry is slowly draining away your life to allow itself to be born?" he asked as Remus looked ashen but Elizabeth smiled and brought her right hand up to rest on her protruding stomach where the unborn child was.
"She is doing no such thing. But even if she were, I could never bring myself to regret carrying her. My precious Lillian." She said in a loving tone as Severus stood dumb struck for several moments before he heard Elizabeth continue. "We decided to name her after a common friend that we have. Her 'Aunt' Lily." Elizabeth said looking between the two men who were not looking as thrilled as she was about the child she was carrying. So she shook her head. "Remus fought me on this, but it is my choice, Lillian did not choose to be the way she is, and there is still a chance she will not be born to be more like her father with his curse." She said but Remus cut her off.
"Even with that risk, we should have terminated the pregnancy! I do not want to lose you, Elizabeth!" Remus exclaimed as he went to put his hand on her shoulder but Elizabeth moved away from him looking beyond infuriated.
"I will not even consider something like that! Because she is our daughter! Even if she has not been born yet! And as her mother, I would gladly surrender what may be what left of my life so that Lillian can be born and have a chance to live a life other than what that damned prophecy said would be her life!" Elizabeth said as she fought to get up from the couch as she stormed out of the room as Severus could hear her go up the stairs followed by a deafening slam from the door to the room she had gone into upstairs.
The surroundings faded as though they had not been there, but as that happened Severus felt a new hatred for Remus. Because of how he had already gathered that the unborn child that Remus had been ready to abandon even before she had been born was his own daughter. However, Severus did not get to linger on that due to how soon another scene was forming as he found himself once again beside Dumbledore but this time it was in the headmaster's office at Hogwarts. It was late, or early, due to how it was no light out at the moment. Severus stood there, not far from where Dumbledore was sitting at his desk reading over some papers, only for the door to burst open as a frantic Remus came in.
"Elizabeth just gave birth about an hour ago, and the child bears the mark…" he said in a frantic yet worn out tone. Something that told Severus that even in the gap between the two memories, that Remus had not come to accept that even if he did not accept Lillian, that Elizabeth loved the child more than anything and had been willing to go to any lengths to insure that Lillian would be born and have the opportunity to live happily.
"There is nothing that can be done then." Dumbledore said in a grave tone. "Elizabeth has made her decision in regards to the child." He said but Remus shook his head.
"She said…just before I left to come to you…that she knows she does not have much longer due to how carrying one with the curse is killing her and more so since the child was born." Remus said, his voice shaking as Severus felt himself becoming more and more enraged at how Remus was so determined to not have attachment to his own daughter from what he could tell. Though Severus did not get to linger on that as Remus continued speaking. "And she asked that I ask you to help insure that her daughter will be safe." He said as Severus wished that the Remus he was seeing was not just a memory, but the real one so he could punch him.
"What did the two of you have in mind?" Dumbledore asked with a blank look on his face watching the young man before him.
"When…when Elizabeth dies…take her daughter and put her with someone…anyone!" Remus ground out as he was showing signs of being beyond frustrated due to how he did not want anything to do with the child that had made it where he only had a year or a little longer with his wife left since she was all but wasting away right before him.
Dumbledore sat there for several moments as though waiting for Remus to take back what he had just said. "So you will be forfeiting your rights as her father?" Dumbledore asked with a distant look on his face since the young man before him seemed to be ready to cast away his daughter who was only an infant and knew nothing of the cruel world she had been born into.
Remus was still for a few moments and then nodded. "I…I do not think I could stand to even look at Elizabeth's daughter after my love dies…" Remus said in a worn voice as he slumped into the chair before the older wizard's desk. "I will even be sending Levi to live with his mother's parents for a time so as to make sure that he is safe from what I am." Remus said as Severus clenched his hands into fists at his side.
'That damned coward!' Severus thought with pure hatred to himself as he did not understand how Remus could be so cowardly to want to abandon Lily. Though he soon looked back to Dumbledore who spoke.
"Very well. I will take custody of your daughter and place her with the person I see most fit. Though you know that at age thirteen depending on what Lillian wants, you may or may not be allowed back into her life." Dumbledore said almost as though he were trying to convince the younger man to reconsider forfeiting his child. However, Remus would not be persuaded as he shook his head only to stand and turn his back on the older wizard as he spoke in a low cold tone.
"I do not care. As far as I am concerned, she killed my beloved wife, and as such she is dead too the moment that Elizabeth breaths her last…" Remus said as the office faded to nothing as with the first memory. Though it still left Severus feeling more and more enraged. Sure he had at first distanced himself from Lily, but he opened his heart to her, allowed the love only a parent would know to show through. Though with how he had seen how Remus was so willing to abandon Lily, he now understood why Dumbledore had been so keen on her knowing love and acceptance from an early age, because she had been denied that.
Soon another scene materialized, one of a room where Severus was sure was where Remus and Elizabeth had been living, thought he mood was different. Elizabeth was deathly still on the bed, her face paler, almost a grey tint to it. Though her face looked peaceful, as though she had gone in her sleep, though beside the bed was Levi Lupin crying over his dead mother. Remus stood not too far from his son as Lily lay on the bed in a simple dress that was stained with her tears as neither her older brother or father were trying to comfort her but had instead just sat her on the bed and left her to cry.
It was not until Dumbledore stepped forward and scooped up Lily in his arms that she finally got tended to. "I take it now is when you want her to be placed elsewhere?" he asked looking toward the grieving father and son. "And that you will not care who she is placed with?" Dumbledore glanced down at the small year old baby in his arms as he then looked back to Remus who looked furious.
"Just get that out of my sight!" he ground out as Dumbledore sighed and shook his head, as though he thought that Remus was acting merely out of pure grief at losing his wife due to how her health had slowly deteriorated ever since Lillian was born. So without another word when he saw no sign of change in Remus' face, Dumbledore turned and walked out of the room and to the fireplace in the living room where he disappeared into the emerald colored flames with the small child in his arms.
When that memory faded Severus felt a sinking feeling of pure guilt and despair wash over him due to how he had not shown Lily the love she needed sooner. Where it had been almost a full year before he had shown her true love. Since she obviously never received any from Remus, though at that thought, Severus could not help but wonder who must have been taking care of Lily for the year she still lived with her biological family since Elizabeth surely had not been in that great of health and Remus seemed repulsed by his own child. It was as the next memory started to form that he remembered that Dumbledore had placed four memory strands into the pensieve.
The memory took on the shape of the headmaster's office as he was standing before a sobbing house elf who looked as though they had either collapsed or thrown themselves at the headmaster's feet. It was not until he heard the crying of the house elf that he realized it was a female, and that the sobbing sounded familiar. But Severus found himself thinking that there was no way it could be who he was thinking it was as the memory unfolded.
"Master Remus gave Twinkle clothes, saying he had no use for Twinkle!" the elf cried as she looked up revealing hazel colored eyes that were blood shot as she was staring up at Dumbledore, confirming to Severus that it was the same Twinkle who had helped him raise his child.
"Even so, a few moments ago, I gave her to her new father." Dumbledore said looking down at the elf with a sympathetic look but she went into a fresh new wave of hysterics.
"But my Mistress Lillian knows no one but Twinkle who cares. She will be lost without her Twinkle!" the small elf cried only for Dumbledore to kneel down and place his hand on the shoulder of the sobbing elf.
"Twinkle, there is a way for you to serve your mistress." He said in a kind voice as Twinkle calmed slightly as Dumbledore continued. "I will allow you to pass yourself off as a Hogwarts elf sent to be in the service of your mistress' new father. To help him care for her." He said as Twinkle smiled only to look as though she wanted to hug the old wizard before her, even as he stood and waved his wand as an official looking house elf uniform appeared in Twinkle's hands. "Wear that and go to Spinner's End, there you will find your young Mistress." He said with a smile as Twinkle smiled through her tears as she pulled on the uniform only to vanish with a small pop.
As the memory faded, Severus felt himself drifting upward, soon finding himself out of the pensieve as he was standing once more in the headmaster's office, while the older man was behind his desk giving Severus a searching look. After a few moments, Severus found his voice as he spoke softly in a low tone. "So, Remus just abandoned her…?" he asked as he saw out of the corner of his eye that Dumbledore nodded. "So that means that Levi is her older brother by blood, and that Lily is ill because she has the curse of a werewolf?" he asked, his voice shaking.
"Yes, she was born with the mark of one born as a wolf, but she is also human." Dumbledore said his voice also low as his blue eyes held no twinkle in their depths. "Since she was born, the wolf has remained dormant in her, but it seems it no longer wishes to be remain that way. So if she is not given the wolfsbane potion soon, the wolf inside of her will destroy her." He said as Severus turned toward him looking as though he were a mad man.
"Why not just tell me that rather than wasting my time with showing me those memories!" he demanded as he was glaring at the older man thinking of how his daughter was in pain in the hospital wing, and that she may have had another episode in the time that Dumbledore had been wasting with showing him his memories of who Lily's so called biological father was. Something that he understood why he did it, but at the same time, Severus was thinking on if he drew his wand right then how many violent curses he could cast on the headmaster for him wasting time like he had.
"I had to make sure that you would still feel the same for her even after learning the truth of whose child she actually is." Dumbledore said in a calm voice. "That she is the child of one of those who made your life hell." He said showing he knew at least a general of what had once been happening with how James Potter and his friends had once tormented Severus.
"I do not care about any of that! Lily is mine! She is innocent of any misdeeds done to me by Remus or his friends." He said as Dumbledore gave him a surprised look before smiling and nodding as Severus turned and rushed from the office to head back down to the dungeons to grab a vial of wolfsbane that he had brewed recently. Once he had it he turned and rushed back up to the hospital wing to find that Lily was looking worse, as there was evidence of her having had another episode. Without any hesitation he rushed over to her and sat on the edge of the bed gathering her up in his arms as she weakly opened her eyes and looked at him as he saw then that they were almost fully overtaken by the amber color.
"D…dad…" Lily spoke weakly as Severus supported her with one arm and rushed to remove the lid from the vial and held it to her lips.
"I need you to drink this, ever drop." He said with an urgent tone as he felt her tense even as she drank it. "I know it tastes awful, but you need to drink all of it." He whispered in a frantic, worried tone as Lily continued to make a face as she drank the vial only for her to slowly relax and be limp in his arms as she fell asleep shortly after drinking the contents of the vial. "Sweet dreams, my precious Lily." Severus whispered as he held Lily close, only to fall asleep sitting on the bed cradling his small daughter in his arms.
A/N: I know I updated this one two times in a row, but I felt that I needed to get this chapter written as soon as possible due to how I wanted to show even more of how despite there being no blood relation, Severus loves Lily more than anything. And yes, I know that Remus is a bit out of character, but it is due to him being in pure grief at how he lost his wife. I also want to take a moment to say that I have not abandoned Eternal Star or Blood Oath: Destiny they are in the works as well but are taking a while. Also I want to dedicate this chapter to Toraach who has been following this story since I first put it up (even though it is only a few chapters in).