A/N This is a one shot, set after season 5. They have landed on the new planet.

If you like it I have another Bellarke story called A Birthday to Remember that is in a A/U.

Until next time,

Cheers!

Medical Cabin

Clarke is tidying up after a pretty quiet day in the Medical Cabin and of course Bellamy helps her as much as he can. Instead of telling her what he really wants to, he steals a few glances in her direction. She is deep in concentration and laughs after she makes a dig at him every so often. The cabin is quite dull but every time she passes the doorway, he admires the way the sunshine hits her golden hair, it mesmerizes him.

Whilst they clean, he informs her of the council's plan to have a party tonight. He wasn't all for it to start with but he was soon convinced by Raven who reminded him that everyone has been putting so much hard work into the new camp. Clarke then reminds him that he still owes her a drink. She goes on to point out that Jasper and Monty have passed their moonshine talents on to some others over the years, therefore this impromptu celebration could get messy. A twinge of pain runs through his body as he remembers those that they have lost on their journey to this point. Clarke, noticing his creased brow, jokingly explains that the others would be pleased that there has been no major "fucks ups" since landing on their new planet.

After the bulk of the clear up is done, Clarke sends him outside whilst she gathers her things. Bellamy's body melts into the medical cabin's outer wall as his legs dangle down next to the steps. He is trying to relax after his failed attempt of telling Clarke about his break-up with Echo. For once she didn't have a cabin full of patients so it was a prime opportunity... which he did not take advantage of... nothing new there then.

After everything they have been through, surely he can say a simple sentence.

He is waiting to walk her to her cabin. She wants to change out the clothes she has been working in before the antics start later. She used to tell him that he didn't need to wait for her but she is used to it now because obviously, he didn't take no for an answer. To be honest, there would probably be trouble if he didn't turn up for their daily catch up on the way to her cabin. Sometimes she does wonder what Echo thinks of their friendship and Bellamy's regular insistence of walking her home. But she notes that Bellamy is so open about the things he is willing to do for his friends, maybe Echo really does understand him after all. Clarke has convinced herself that he just likes to keep an eye on her. He is always trying to make up for the six years she was alone on Earth. When she realizes this is on his mind, she tries to tell him that he would have died, if he stayed with her, he would be dead. Which wouldn't be good for anyone, especially her.

He curses himself for not being able to tell her about about the break up. He wants to tell her, in fact he desperately needs to tell her... he just can't seem to spit it out.

Bellamy tries to pretend that telling Clarke isn't be a big deal but deep down he knows exactly why he is struggling to get his words out. He wants her to be happy about it. Which he knows sounds crazy and it probably makes him sound like a conceited asshole. In his dreams when he tells her, she slow mo runs into his arms and kisses him like he has never been kissed before. In his nightmares she shrugs her shoulders, shows him some sympathy then pats him on the back like the friend she's supposed to be. The way he sees it, is that they have been through some pretty unbelievable things so maybe there is still a chance for them... Ha.

She might not be interested in his love life one bit, which in turn would mean that she doesn't want anything to do with his love life... therefore meaning her feelings are completely platonic, just as he suspected... and feared.

He also notes how crazy he is being and reminds himself to chill out.

He tries to convince himself that the break up with Echo was not directly because of Clarke but he couldn't keep ignoring the burning sensation to touch her all over... and neither could Echo. Bellamy would say he has hid his feelings well enough but Echo would say different. So would a few other members of the group, to be fair.

He believes or keeps trying to believe that him and Clarke have come too far in their relationship, to risk telling her how he feels... and her not feeling the same. She might pull away from him completely and he couldn't bare that. He would much rather have her as a friend than not have her at all. He couldn't loose her again, no fucking way.

The more he thinks about his feelings towards the doctor, the more he dramatizes it in his head. The more worked up he gets and in turn making it harder to tell her that he is single.

Deep in thought, he doesn't notice Murphy approach him.

"Yo Echo told Emori that you guys broke up."

Bellamy sighs.

Murphy continues without a care. "Take it you haven't told Clarke about it?"

Murphy and Bellamy were pretty chummy these days and John Murphy just keeps surprising him. Murphy stands smiling, as if he is happy about this news, so Bellamy goes along with it and asks "Why would you think that?"

"Because you and Griffin aren't slow motion french kissing or holding hands or some crap."

In response, Bellamy is uncontrollably speechless, so Murphy adds with a smirk "... plus you look emotionally constipated."

Bellamy now a little flustered states "I will tell her later." John notes that Bellamy decided to ignore the kissing comment which makes him grin even more.

Bellamy jumps to his feet as Clarke pops out the cabin door "Sorry Bell, I'm ready now." She notices Murphy and smiles "You ready for the party John?"

Murphy laughs at Bellamy's bright red face but then replies to his blonde friend " Hell yeah I am! Myself and Raven have got a whole team dedicated to party preparations. Plus we have been brewing moonshine since like day one on this planet." Clarke giggles, realizing she it quite excited now.

Murphy pats Bellamy on the back " Jordan wants to have "pre-drinks" with the guys... like in the olden days or some crap... sorry Clarke no Princesses allowed."

Clarke cringes at Murphy using Bellamy's nickname for her. "Oh does he now? Bellamy will be there to keep an eye on him then."

Bellamy laughs "I will?"

Clarke scoffs "Yes! He has never drank before, make sure he doesn't over do it." To which Bellamy nods.

Murphy smirks at their parenting of Jordan and shouts "Cool see you after you finish your Princess guard duties." as he walks off to Jordan's cabin (That Bellamy shares with him now, since he broke up with Echo).

Clarke shouts after him "Stop calling me that! Plus I don't need a guard you know!"

Murphy laughs back "Tell that to Blake." She huffs.

Bellamy chuckles, and reminds her that he is only being a friend, not a guard.

Clarke's Cabin

Bellamy follows Clarke inside her and Madi's Cabin. Where he finds himself surrounded by women.

Madi greets him with an unusually massive grin which Raven copies. Raven is perched on a stool at the make-shift dinner table, pouring moonshine into five cups. Emori sits in the corner with her arms crossed, waiting impatiently for her first drink. He notices his sister sitting sheepishly in the opposite corner and says "Hi O" with a smile. She has come a long way since Bloodrena. Raven and Clarke try to include her as much as they can, which they were ordered to do by Madi.

Clarke gestures Bellamy to join her behind the bedroom wall separator which makes the other girls giggle. He follows her. He comes here most days but usually doesn't have an audience , whose giggling made him on edge. As he follows Clarke past the others his blush burns through his cheeks and makes his face hot like the campfire on a dry night. He suddenly feels awkward and attempts to hid his rosy cheeks with his large hand.

Clarke asks him what she should wear and he gives an honest opinion, whilst slumbered over the bottom of her bed, muttering his usual banter.

They have their usual chit chat as Clarke changes and Bellamy examines the Ceiling causiously. Well, they do until he hears Raven shout "Oh Hi Echo." To which he jumps out of his skin. Smiles to Clarke and says he will catch her after the pre-drinks. He rushes to the doorway out of breath despite only being a few strides for him. This makes Clarke's brow crease in confusion as Echo has turned up lots of times prior, so wonders what the problem is.

Bellamy gently nudges Raven as it would appear Echo was in fact NOT in the room. Octavia lets out an almost evil chuckle, at the state her brother is in. He realizes they all know about the breakup now... apart from Clarke. Who appears behind him wearing his favorite shirt of hers. Confused she asks "Where's Echo?" Bellamy, panic stricken, barks "I don't know." and basically falls out the door and makes his way to Jordan's cabin. This makes all the girls laugh but makes Clarke even more confused.

Jordan's Cabin

Jordan is absolutely high on life... or maybe moonshine fumes. "Yo Uncle Bellamy welcome to "pre's". Grab a cup."

Bellamy smirks, knowing all the guys in this room are gonna be so pissed tonight.

Bellamy grabs a cup and explains "Just a couple."

Murphy grins "Yeah a couple... dozen."

Bellamy, Jordan, Murphy, Shaw, Miller and Jackson all settle down, drinks in hand. Bellamy smirks as he notices Jordan has tidied up for the occasion.

After a few drinks each, the chat changes from trivial things to something a bit more juicy, or Jordan tries to make it juicy anyway.

Jordan, still not 100% caught up on social norms these days, which actually makes him even more likable, spits out "So Bellamy you gonna marry Clarke?"

Bellamy nearly chokes on his drink as the others sit amused, waiting for his response. "Jordan it's only been two weeks since Echo and I broke up!"

Murphy grunts "And you still haven't told Clarke about it." Bellamy shrugs "Pretty sure Raven and Madi will have told her by now... they are having a girls only pre-party, party, as we speak."

Shaw nods "Raven won't have been able to hold in it any longer."

Miller affectionately pats Jackson's leg and stands up to re-fill the cups with moonshine. "Let's play a game."

Everyone apart from Jordan grunts.

"Would you rather?" asks Jordan.

Murphy laughs "What old ass news articles about girl frat parties have you been reading Green?"

Jordan ignores him and asks Shaw "Would you rather have a kid with Raven or never see her again?"

Bellamy snorts "Do we really need to play this game?"

Murphy adds "It's a bit juvenile..."

Bellamy laughs as he accepts another refill from Miller "You know it's bad when John Murphy says it's juvenile!"

Surprisingly, Shaw decides to play along, for Jordan's sake "That's an easy one. Of course I would have a kid with her, I would miss her shouting at me too much."

The room momentarily fills with a flutter of quiet laughs as the others nod in approval of his answer.

Murphy's eyes light up with opportunity, just as he burps. "Bellamy, would you rather tell Clarke how you feel about her right now or get back together with Echo."

Bellamy spilling his drink a little, spits "Shut up Murphy."

Jordan interjects "That's not fair on Echo!" Bellamy nods in agreement.

Jackson pipes up , definitely a bit drunk "It's not fair on Echo because of course he will choose Clarke, he always chooses Clarke."

Miller gently nudges Jackson and silence covers the room once more.

...

A while later, after copious amount of alcohol and Bellamy telling Jordan to take it easy about fifty times, they all begin to feel pretty drunk.

Bellamy feeling pretty pissed randomly blurts out "I'll go tell Clarke now."

Jordan jumps up excitedly "About how you feel?"

Bellamy dramatically shakes his head and looses his balance "Noooooooooo...ab... *burp* about Echo."

Jordan sighs and Bellamy adds "And that she is pretty."

Jordan questions "Echo?"

Bellamy shouts "Nooooooooooo... Clarke."

Murphy stands on his third attempt "Yeah our pre-drinks suck, lets go annoy the girls and get this party started."

As they all gather their cups and moonshine supplies, Bellamy continues "By the way... I didn't mean that Echo isn't pretty... she is."

Shaw laughs "yeah we get it... your fine."

Bellamy goes on "BUT Clarke is super pretty... she's cute... which is funny because she is the commander of death."

They all laugh. One by one they go out the door until Bellamy and Murphy try to go out at the same time and get momentarily stuck before catching up with the others.

The group of men are distracted by what they find on their way to Clarke's cabin. There are various fires going and music is playing but they can't figure out where from. Better yet, people are laughing and chatting.

Bellamy and Murphy, arms linked, stop in awe at the sight before them. Everyone seems happy for the first time in so long.

This is going to be a good night.

The girls

"I can't believe he never told you." A tipsy and slightly angry Raven shouts.

Clarke is speechless.

Madi pipes up "He is probably just nervous."

Clarke blushing "Why would he be nervous?"

Octavia laughs slightly angry "Clarke, Bellamy poisoned me to save your life!"

Raven unaware of this is shocked, which pushes her to have another sip of her drink.

Clarke also takes a swig and Raven adds "He is nervous because he wants you!"

Clarke shakes her head "No no no, he was with Echo for five years."

Octavia adds "He thought you were dead Clarke!"

Madi smiles "He was so happy when I told him you were alive and then he went straight to save you. No hesitation."

Raven now beaming as well, hopping for a breakthrough here, says " You two have been pussy footing around your feelings for way too long, he thinks if you might not feel the same after everything that has happened, he hasn't told you because he is worried you will get scared off."

Clarke asks, disgusted at the thought "Scared off by Bellamy?"

Raven smacks the palm of her hand against her forehead "Clarke, shut up, you better be pretending you don't know that boy is head over heals in love with you or I will beat you... in fact i will have Octavia beat you."

Madi Pulls Clarke over from the table and pushes her into a fur pelt covered chair as the all the other girls gather around her.

Each ready to put their two pence piece in -

Raven insists "He literally runs to you, even when you say you don't need him" whilst gripping Clarke's shoulders.

Octavia who is now quite interested in the conversation adds "He let you see his vulnerable side... and i will say it again... poisoned me to save you."

Emori exaggeratedly gushing exclaims "The way he looks at youuuuuuuu."

Madi basically screams " The way you look at him!"

Clarke smiles remembering everything her and Bellamy Blake have been through. All the fall outs, near touches and laughs.

Raven spits waving her hands in the air "All that the heart and the head crap!"

Too confident for her own good, Madi says "The radio calls." Which makes the others eyes light up.

Octavia queries "What radio calls?"

Clarke shoots Madi a disproving look but Madi snuck herself some moonshine and is feeling exceptionally romantic, so explains to the others "She called Bellamy every day he was in space."

The three other girls sigh "awwwww" in unison.

Octavia putting the pieces together states "But he didn't hear her."

Clarke shakes her head to confirm that he has no idea.

Octavia explains "Look I know my brother, if he had heard your radio calls, if he knew you were alive, I can guarantee he wouldn't have gotten together with Echo."

Suddenly Clarke smiles. Encouraged by the moonshine she remembers the radio calls, not knowing if she would see him again. If he knew about them, maybe things would be different. She thought, if he knew she was waiting for him, hoping for him to come back to her, maybe Octavia is right, maybe he wouldn't have got together with Echo.

If Clarke had made it back, maybe she would have been the one in his arms. Oh how she dreamt of sleeping in his arms. She shakes the thought out of her mind, hearing cheering from over the other side of the camp, they decide to go check out this so called party.

The Actual Party

Not so lady like, the "ladies" flounder outside to see what's going on. They all smile. Partly at the fact they are all little pissed. Partly at the fact that they have missed a lot going on outside but mostly because they notice the guys on the other side of the gathering, doing the exact same thing.

Clarke calms up, her eyes meeting Bellamy's. He smiles over at her and she beams back. Just as she is about to step forward to go towards him, Murphy and Jordan grab him and pull him towards the crowd of dancers. He complies with his friends but looks back to smile at her once more before cutting some shapes, shapes that she knew he would regret in the morning.

Raven laughs "I think the guys are drunk." Clarke nods in agreement.

She adds "Are we that drunk?" The girls all viciously shake their heads, saying "No." They do it so confidently that they believe it for about 10 seconds until Madi belches and Raven stumbles over to Shaw.

After a while of mingling with everyone, they all get separated.

Madi forces Octavia to dance with her. At first Octavia is very reserved but then suddenly she feels like the innocent girl who landed on Earth all those years ago... before all the bad stuff... before all the stuff she done that she would never forget. She is actually, genuinely smiling for once.

Shaw and Raven are perched on a log whispering to each other.

Emori goes to chat with Echo and a few others who are gathered around a table full of food, specially prepared for this evening.

Murphy, Bellamy and Jordan are still fooling around, dancing... if you can call it dancing that is.

Clarke stands back from the crowd and watches the boys, as she gleefully sips away at a cup of moonshine. Before she knows it, Murphy and Bellamy grab her and pull her towards the commotion. She usually would decline but she was feeling particularly out going this evening. The four dancers make shapes and jump around with massive smiles plastered over their faces. Clarke can't help but watch Bellamy as he shakes his head and arms around. It is as if he was shaking away his troubles. He opens his eyes and smiles at her, he lifts her up over his shoulder and twirls around, the people around them laugh. Murphy goes off to find Emori, whilst Jordan just kind of just disappears into the crowd, like a ghost.

Raven shoves Shaw a little too hard with excitement and points to the pair of leaders, he shrugs as if to pretend that the guys weren't discussing the pair earlier.

Bellamy places Clarke back down on to her own two feet. She isn't sure if she is lightheaded because of dizziness or it is the way Bellamy's biceps felt curled around her while she was in the air. He gently puts his hands on her shoulders to steady her and she lets her body draw closer to his. The heat from his chest radiates through her face and down into her chest. For a moment she forgets about everything and pushes her cheek against his tall figure. She slowly wraps her arms around his waist. Bellamy sways and knots his arms around her neck. She looks up at his dark features and makes eye contact with him. The closer they get, the deeper his stare grows. There is something about his gaze that she has has never found in anyone else. She doesn't dare to look away from his animal like desire. Bellamy thinks his heart stops for a moment but gathers himself as his gaze becomes softer, much like the light brown freckles that cover the bridge of his nose. He whispers into her hair "You having a good time Princess?"

Suddenly angered Clarke steps away from him and the whole mood changes like a candle blown out on the darkest night. Clarke viciously spits "Why didn't you tell me you broke up with Echo? It's been two weeks and everyone else knows!"

As soon as she blurts it out she wishes she had just answered his question instead of making this a moonshine induced argument. On the other hand why the hell is she the last person to find out?

Bellamy is caught off guard and looks at her like a startled deer.

He stumbles, looking almost wounded but manages to reply "I was going to... tonight, I swear." Clarke blows the wild hairs out of her eyes and storms off in the opposite direction leaving Bellamy dazed and confused.

Of course, he goes after her like he always does, into the woods.

"Clarke *burp* Stop."

He continues "I didn't mean to upset you." She stops.

She turns back "We don't keep secrets!"

"It wasn't a secret Clarke! I just hadn't found the right time to tell you"

Clarke barks " Everyone knew apart from me. What about when we were fishing the other day, or EVERY afternoon you walked me home from the Medical Cabin or today in my room?"

Bellamy can't help but feel she is over reacting... he is the one who just went through a breakup, not her. His hotheadedness bites back " Stop acting like you are a victim! I haven't done anything wrong."

"We are best friends... well I thought so but I don't know anymore."

Raging, he warns her "This better be the moonshine talking."

She screams "OR WHAT?"

He stutters, panicking "OR I..." He stops, takes a deep breath and grabs her. He pushes his lips onto hers, hard.

She steps back stunned. Red faced Bellamy explains " It was because of you. I couldn't tell you because I couldn't stop thinking about you and Echo could tell."

She sheepishly pushes her boot into the dirt, realizing that she perhaps did just over react, a little anyway, damn moonshine.

Scared of the answer but at the same time desperate to know, she whispers "Do you mean... you broke up with Echo because of me?"

Bellamy is now terrified, this is not how he imagined him telling her about his feelings.

He bluntly states "No." She instantly deflates at his snappy response.

He notices her turn as if upset and decides to just tell her the truth and the truth is he is in love with her.

He sighs "Fuck it." She turns back towards him and blinks expectantly.

"Yeah well so basically, Clarke Griffin my favorite pass time is simply being by your side. When you aren't around, I feel empty. Out here I can find my way, I know where I stand but with you I am lost... mainly in your eyes." She smiles, holding in a giggle.

She steps forward slowly, as if not to startle a wild animal. But he flares up again "No, let me finish." She smirks and holds her position.

"I thought that I had left you here to die Clarke and it nearly destroyed me. When I found out you were alive, a weight was lifted from my shoulders and ever since, you are all I can think about. I think about your eyes. I think about the way your hair shines in the sunshine. I think about the look you give me when I say something out of line to put me in my place. I think about the look you give me after I make you laugh. Oh Jesus I love it when you laugh. Yes, we don't always see eye to eye but no matter what... we always end up together, on the same team because that's the way it's supposed to be. After I put the flame into Madi, I didn't think you would speak to me ever again, I am so glad you did because otherwise I couldn't handle this crazy existence without you. I am a better person when your around. Clarke, I have dreamt of our first kiss a million times and it was never like what just happened but it was still amazing because I have wanted to kiss you since ... well... like the year 2150."

Clarke beams "You done now Bell?"

He shakes his head breathless and she laughs.

"Jaha once told me that I keep you centered. Clarke Griffin I can now wholeheartedly say that it is you who keeps me centered. I need you."

Clarke steps closer, she swallows as she advances. He feels the look in her eyes might just consume him. He can barely speak but continues "But I don't just need you... I want you. I want you bad."

Clarke puts her hand on his jawline. She traces it with her slender fingers for a few moments, he smiles with his eye closed, content with her touch. As she presses her body against his, he feels like his soul might catch on fire. After slowly standing on her tiptoes, teasing him. She whispers in his ear "Well shut the hell up and have me."