Jiraiya sat there at the small desk in the apartment staring at a blank sheet of paper. It has been that way for the past several days, and so far he was nowhere near any progress with his first novel. An idea wasn't popping into his mind, and often times he found himself thinking about the series of events that occurred in his life over the past few years. It has been rough, but finally he found happiness in Ayame. So if he was so happy, why couldn't he think of anything, even a single letter to write on the paper before him that seemed to be mocking him?

Ayame walked up beside Jiraiya and placed her hands on his shoulders and peered down onto the blank paper, "Still no progress huh?"

He put his pen on the table and rubbed his temples wearily, "I got nothing." He sighed.

"Maybe you just need a change of scenery to get some inspiration." She said, "How about we go out to dinner and hang out in town for a bit?"

"I think I'm going to need more of a permanent change of scenery." He admitted.

"What do you mean?"

He patted his lap to silently tell Ayame to have a seat on it. She walked over to him and sat on his lap while wrapping her slender arms around his neck. He didn't know how he was going to break the news for her, but he had to find someway of saying it. He was thinking about it for quite some time, and he wasn't sure if Ayame would want any part of it, but he needed to do this for himself.

"I need to leave town." He started, "I believe that the further I get away from the village, the more I will forget about my past. Perhaps then I'll be able to write my first novel and find my destiny."

"Was your past that terrible? Why would you want to forget?" She asked with nothing but concern in her voice. Jiraiya never told him about the things the happened to him in the past. She had no idea that his childhood crush broke his heart multiple of times, he almost died in war, and the fact that his best friend betrayed him and almost murdered him. How was he supposed to tell her all of that without having the pain that he experienced come back?

"It wasn't very pretty."

"Tell me." She said. As his girlfriend, she wanted to know about the pain he experienced. Perhaps if she knew, she would be able to help him through it.

"It's not a nice story Ayame. Are you sure you want to know?"

"Of course I do." She said with a slight smile, "I care about you so I would like to know what happened to you. I only want to help, but Jiraiya I can't help you if I don't know anything about you."

She was such a sweet person and she genuinely cared for Jiraiya. How could he refuse to tell her about his past?

"Okay." He sighed, "When I was a little kid I had a huge crush on my teammate. She never liked me though. In fact she used to beat me up and call me terrible names, but I still loved her. Four years ago her brother died in war so I was there to comfort her and help her through that hard time. The day of the funeral I got everything that I wanted from her. We had sex, but when I wanted to establish a romantic relationship with her, she ran away from me and told me that all she wanted was comfort. I was heartbroken and I tried to fall out of love with her, but I just couldn't. A few days after, we were sent to war by our Hokage. I almost died, but she saved me. She left the village and I didn't see or hear from her for four years. She came back into my life when my best friend and former teammate betrayed us and almost killed me. She saved me from death again, and to thank her I invited her for dinner. We went back to my apartment for a cup of tea and to my surprise she apologized for using me. I was so happy that she finally told me sorry and we ended up having sex. The following morning I woke up alone. She left me again. At first I was sad, but now I'm mad at her. I thought we were finally on the same page and yet she left me again. I deserved better than that. I deserved to be happy. When I met you, I found that happiness. So thank you for that Ayame. I'll always be grateful for that."

Ayame let the words he spoke sink in. He wasn't lying when he said that his story wasn't a pretty one. Having his heart broken multiple times, two near death experiences, and being betrayed by his best friend could not have been easy to go through. She wanted nothing more than to bring him the happiness that he was starved of for so many years.

"I'm so sorry that all of that happened to you."

"Don't apologize. None of it was your fault."

"So where is this woman now?" She asked.

"I have no idea."

Jiraiya honestly had no clue where Tsunade was or what was happening to her. As far as he was concerned, she was out of his life for good.

"So moving further and further way from your village will help you to forget about your past?"

"I think so."

"I want to help you." She started, "But I don't want to leave this town."

"How can you help me if you're not with me?"

"I was born and raised here Jiraiya." She said and rose to her feet, "I've had many disappointments in my life, but never once did this town disappoint me. When my parents died the people of this town were there to help me through it, and when I was in need of a job and a home, they provided for me. How can I leave here?"

"Look Ayame." He started, "I know what this town means to you so I'm not going to ask you to pick up and leave all that you've ever known..." He said sadly, "But I'm going to leave. I need to find my destiny."

"Then maybe I wasn't meant to be in your destiny."

"Maybe so."

"I don't regret ever meeting you." She said with tears brewing in her eyes, "And I really do care about you, but I just can't leave. This is my home."

"I understand why you don't want to leave Ayame." He said as he walked towards her and wiped away the tears from her eyes, "I don't regret meeting you either. You've given me happiness. I'll never forget you." He placed one last kiss on her cheek and proceeded to pack his things.

Ayame watched as he put his belongings into his bag with teary eyes. She wanted nothing more than for him to stay with her and build a life with him, but he had to find his destiny. Obviously it could not be found in the current town he was in. He had to do what he had to do. Who was she to stop him just because she didn't want to be alone?

"You don't have to leave so soon." She said through tears.

"The faster I leave the better it will be." He was finished packing so he placed the bag on his back and headed towards the door.

"I'm going to miss you." She said softly and placed her hand on his back while staring down at the ground.

"Me too." He said as he turned around to face her for the last time, "You're going to be okay." He wrapped his arms around her and embraced her. She was so sad and he felt terrible for leaving her.

"I hope you find all that you're looking for."

"I hope so too." He stopped embracing her and opened the door, "Farewell."

She watched as he walked through the door and tried her best not to fall apart. She enjoyed the short time that she had with him. She would never forget it, "Goodbye Jiraiya." She whispered before the closing the door. She was alone once again. She only hoped that Jiraiya could find the happiness that he so deserved.

It took him a few days of long, tiring travel, but he was finally at a place far away from his home, The Village Hidden in the Leaves. He was now situated in the Land of Waves and staying at a small inn until he could find a more permanent dwelling. As he sat in his room, for the first time in what seemed like forever, he could actually come up with an idea for his first novel that he thought would turn out to be a best seller. Well, he hoped that it would do that well.

His idea for his book was simple. It would be about a courageous young ninja named Naruto who would never go back on his word. The book would be action packed and appeal to an audience who enjoyed stories that allowed them to venture into the world of the main character. So far, he had the first chapter written out. He was proud of the progress he was making, and sincerely hoped that he could continue along that path. If he did, his book would be published and available to the general public far sooner than he expected.

After a few days of staying in the inn, his bill became rather high. It turned out that staying at the inn was far too expensive for him, and he had limited funds. He needed to find a place of his own where he could continue to write in peace, but a place that wouldn't be too costly for him to live in.

Almost immediately after discovering that the inn he was staying in was burning a hole in his pocket, he ventured out to hopefully locate a somewhat permanent home for himself. Some of the houses he came across were either to big for just him alone, or too shabby. In turned out that locating a home wasn't the easiest thing to do, especially since he wasn't from the Land of Waves and therefore didn't know the area very well.

His search finally came to an end when he stumbled across a vacant cottage in a grassy field. He contacted a real estate agent about the home and it was opened for rent. The money he would have to pay monthly wasn't too much so he didn't hesitate before agreeing to pay that amount and live there for as long as he wanted to.

The cottage only had one bedroom, one bathroom, a small living area that was attached to an equally as small kitchen. He didn't need a space bigger than what he had. It was just him after all, and he had no intentions of starting a relationship with another woman anytime soon. He just wanted some time to himself so if he brought a woman into his life, he not only had to pay her attention, but he had to deal with all the drama that comes with being in a relationship. He absolutely hated ending things with Ayame because she was so calm and kind. She was unlike any woman he has ever been with, and that was a nice change for him.

He occupied his time by writing. It was extremely quiet in the day and it was even worse at night. The silence was deafening and he often found himself yearning for the noises that he would hear around the village. He missed the sounds of laughter and daily chatter on the streets, the shrill sound of the Ninja Academy school bell, the barking of dogs, and the pitter patter of footsteps. Never in his life did he think that complete silence would drive him insane.

He didn't know why, but his mind started to wander to the very first day when he became apart of team Sarutobi. That was so long ago and yet he could remember every single moment of that fateful day. The images he had of that day were crisp and vivid in his mind. He thought he would forget, but he never did. It was amazing how he could remember everything in such clarity. That was the day when he truly felt like he belonged...

Jiraiya woke up to the shrill sounds of his alarm clock. He grumbled as he was so unpleasantly dragged out of his slumber and extended his arm to turn off the annoying ringing device. He groggily rose into a sitting position in his bed and turned his head to look at the silenced alarm clock that was showing the time. It was definitely time to get up and get ready, for it was the start of a new day, but not just any ordinary day. That was the day when he would be placed into his new ninja squad. Excitement started to set in, so without any further hesitation, he sprung out of bed and headed to the bathroom to brush his teeth, take a shower, and get dressed for the day that he had ahead of him.

He emerged from the bathroom, freshly showered and ready to start the day. Before leaving the privacy of his room, he brushed through his wild spiky hair, but that task proved to be extremely difficult since he didn't brush his hair frequently. Many knots accumulated throughout all the days he didn't groom himself so therefore, he was having a hard time to untangle them.

"Jiraiya!" His mother shouted from downstairs. She was an impatient woman who was extremely miserable when things didn't go her way. Jiraiya had nothing in common with his mother except for his white hair, "If you don't come down here this instant and eat your breakfast you're going to be late for your first day with your new team!"

Jiraiya cursed under his breath as he heard his mother's shrill voice, "I'm coming mom!" He grumbled. He tried once again to untangle the last stubborn knot in his hair, but it a was too hard to do so without ripping out that patch of hair, so he shrugged his shoulders and left it as it was. He walked downstairs and saw is mother standing by the stove with a frying pan in her hand and an apron over her clothing, and his father sitting at the dining table reading the newspaper. Jiraiya had more in common with his father than his mother, for they shared the same happy-go-lucky personality. His father had spiky black hair and had the same obsidian eyes as Jiraiya. They were almost identical with the exception of their hair color. Jiraiya's parents were civilians who were never born with the talent to become ninjas, so Jiraiya was the only ninja in their family. His father told him how proud he was of him everyday, and even though his mother didn't want to admit it, she was proud of him too.

"Good morning mom and dad." Jiraiya said before taking his seat at the table.

"Well you sure took long enough." His mother scolded, "You know how bad it will look if you show up late for your first day? First impressions are lasting you know!"

"Take it easy on the boy Kagura." His father said, "He was just trying to look his best for his first day." He explained while noticing Jiraiya's attempt to tame his wild hair, "I don't blame him either. More than likely he'll meet pretty girls like the First Hokage's granddaughter. Now she's a beauty! I sincerely hope that you end up on her team." He said and nudged Jiraiya in the shoulder. Like Jiraiya, his father appreciated a good looking woman and wasn't afraid to admire the body of a woman.

"Just shut up and read your paper Gorou!" She snapped and filled a bowl with chunky oatmeal and placed it before Jiraiya, "Eat up. You'll need your strength."

"Oatmeal again?" Jiraiya whined, "You made oatmeal everyday for the past month mom!"

"Quit complaining and eat!"

"Go easy on your mother Jiraiya." Gorou started, "You know oatmeal is the only thing your mother can cook without burning." He teased and buried his face into the newspaper to prevent making eye contact with his now infuriated wife.

"You're lucky that I even cook for you! You're so ungrateful it's sickening!" Kagura shouted before pouring herself a bowl and sitting in her spot at the table.

"So Jiraiya." Gorou said to grab his son's attention, "Are you excited?"

"Extremely." He smiled, "Now that I'm out of that stupid Academy I can go on missions outside of the village and be a real ninja."

"You have to be careful you know Jiraiya." Kagura said softly. She was obviously worried for her son's safety. She knew many ninjas who died while on missions, and she would be absolutely devastated if anything like that were to happen to her one and only son. She was hard on him, but she loved him more than life itself, "You could end up in a dangerous situation and I just want you to be safe."

"I will be mom." He said before eating his final spoonful of oatmeal, "I gotta go." He rose to his feet and placed his empty bowl into the sink, "Wouldn't want to be late." He said and made his way to the door.

"Good luck Jiraiya!" His parents called after him.

He nodded his head and made his way over to the Academy. He had a big day ahead of him and he was ready to take the bull by the horns and discover what the day had in store for him.

He arrived at the Ninja Academy and sat himself down in the classroom, awaiting the arrival of the sensei who would tell them which teams they were on. He was hoping to be placed into a strong team of people who he could get along with easily. More than anything in the world, he wanted to make life long friends who would always have his back. He never had any siblings, so his teammates would be the closest people to siblings he would ever have.

For what seemed like forever, he sat in his seat and watched other children his age socialize with each other. It was as if he was the only one without a friend, for nobody really wanted to associate with him due to his track record. He was known around the village as a pervert because he was caught multiple times peeking at girls in the hot springs. He couldn't help it though, he inherited that bad habit from none other than his father. He thought he was the only one without a friend until he spotted a pale boy with long, straight, jet black hair sitting in the corner by himself, staring into oblivion. He was expressionless so it was hard to tell if he was happy or sad. It was kind of strange to see him there all by himself, but for some reason Jiraiya hoped that he was on his team.

Finally the sensei walked in and silenced the noisy room. Jiraiya was anxious to hear his name and the other two young ninjas who would be on his team, so instead of sitting still, he was fidgeting with his fingers and tapping his foot with great expectancy.

"I will now announce the newly formed ninja squads." The sensei began and started to call out the names of the team members.

Four teams later, Jiraiya's name was called.

"Jiraiya, Orochimaru, and Tsunade Senju will be on the same team under the command of the Third Hokage, Hiruzen Sarutobi." The sensei said.

All eyes were on the newly formed trio. Everybody seemed to be jealous of them because the Hokage was their sensei. They were sure to become strong ninjas under his supervision. Jiraiya was more than excited about the team he ended up on. He was teamed up with the black haired boy who he wanted on his team initially, and the granddaughter of the First Hokage. Perhaps his team could become like a second family to him.

"Now that you know who your teammates are, wait here for your sensei." The sensei walked out the room and the young ninjas waited for their assigned sensei to emerge through the door.

A few minutes passed and Jiraiya, Orochimaru, and Tsunade were the only ones left in the room. None of them exchanged words with each other so the room was as silent as can be. The door creaked open suddenly and there stood the Third Hokage. Jiraiya was in awe for he has never in his life been in such a close proximity to the man who ruled over the Leaf Village. He was the strongest ninja in all the land and Jiraiya was proud to be in his presence.

"You three must be my students." He said with a smile on his face.

"Yes we are." Tsunade spoke up, "I'm so glad that you're my sensei Lord Hokage."

"I'm glad to have you too Tsunade." He said and patted her on the head before turning to the others, "Now, how about we go to the training field to get to know each other a little better?" He suggested and walked through the door with Tsunade by his side and Jiraiya and Orochimaru trailing behind them. Tsunade was the only one he seemed to know. Jiraiya wondered how they knew each other already, but assumed that his question would be answered when they got to the training field.

They arrived at the field that was empty except for three stumps that stood side by side in the middle of the grassy field. It was a very peaceful, lush environment to be in. The perfect place to train.

"Now that we're all here, how about we get to know each other. I'll start first." Sarutobi said, "All of you probably know this, but my name is Hiruzen Sarutobi. I'm the Third Hokage and now your sensei. I enjoy seeing the younger generation grow into fine ninjas and I dislike it when people are in disagreements that could lead to war." He said, "Now that you know me, you three can introduce yourselves. Tell me your name, what you like, your dislikes, and your hobbies."

"I'll start." Tsunade declared, "My name is Tsunade Senju. I like to read medical books because one day I want to become a medical ninja. I dislike annoying people, and I guess you can say that reading is my hobby." She said.

Jiraiya was in awe of her beauty. She had straight blonde bangs that framed the sides of her face and her hair was pinned into a high ponytail. Her eyes were brown, like the color of honey, and even though she was flat chested, she was perfect in his eyes.

"Hi there I'm Jiraiya." He said while extending a hand to her, "You can send me love letters later."

He watched as her face became red with anger. He was almost certain that she would punch him, but thankfully she didn't. Instead she said, "In your dreams loser." And walked away from him to stand beside Sarutobi without even shaking his hand.

"Okay." Sarutobi said, "What are your likes, dislikes, and hobbies Jiraiya?"

"I like good looking girls, I dislike ugly girls, and my hobby is doing research." He said without a shame in the world.

"Seriously?" Sarutobi asked sarcastically before moving on to Orochimaru, "And you?"

"My name is Orochimaru. I don't particularly have any likes, I dislike many things, and I don't have a hobby. Instead I have a dream. That dream is to learn all the jutsu known to man."

"Very ambitious Orochimaru." Sarutobi said in bewilderment.

Jiraiya never heard Orochimaru speak until now, and what he got from Orochimaru's speech was the understanding that he was a very strange guy. It was bad enough that he looked strange, but the fact that his behavior was strange made it ten times worse.

"How about we start training then." Sarutobi said and held out two bells before the trio, "In my hand are two bells. That means-"

"That one of us will get tied to the stump if we fail to get a bell." Orochimaru finished Sarutobi's sentence.

"You're very sharp Orochimaru." Sarutobi complimented.

"Say Tsunade, if I get a bell will you go out with me?" Jiraiya asked, hoping that Tsunade would say yes.

"Alright but when you don't get a bell stop bothering me okay!" Tsunade said with her nose up in the air.

"Oh yeah! This is gonna be a piece of cake!" Jiraiya said happily.

"I want you three to come at me with the intent to kill." Sarutobi explained and the trio readied themselves to attack. Jiraiya was determined to get a bell, because that meant that he would be awarded with the opportunity to go out with Tsunade.

Sarutobi jumped out of their view and they proceeded to come up with a strategy to get a bell from the Hokage. It wasn't going to be an easy task, but with careful strategic planning, it was possible to actually retrieve a bell. Jiraiya was the only one who didn't really plan anything through. He was reckless and jumped out into the open without any thought. He fell for the most obvious of traps, such as seeing a bell all by itself in broad daylight and picking it up. He was fooled by the ridiculous trap and when he was bending down to pick it up, thinking that he won a bell, his foot was caught in a rope and resulted in him dangling upside down from a tree branch.

At the end of the day, Orochimaru and Tsunade each got a bell, but none was left for Jiraiya. As a result, he was tied to the stump and forced to stay behind to get a lecture from Sarutobi while Tsunade and Orochimaru were free to go home.

"Well Jiraiya." Tsunade said while dangling her bell in front of Jiraiya's face, "Looks like I won our little wager. Now you have to stay away from me." She teased.

"Oh shut up you flat chested troll!"

"What did you say you egg headed perv?!" Tsunade shouted while dragging the neckline of his shirt in an angry manner.

"Okay that's enough you two." Sarutobi parted the two before they killed each other. He just wanted a team that would get along, but instead he had three young ninjas, two of which barely knew each other and yet bickered, and one who was just indifferent towards everyone and everything, "Tsunade, you and Orochimaru can go home now."

Tsunade held up her bell to Jiraiya once again and stuck out her tongue in a mocking manner, "Bye!"

Jiraiya watched as his teammates walked home while he was stuck to the captivity of the stump.

"Tsunade is obviously your favorite." Jiraiya grumbled under his breath, but Sarutobi managed to hear.

"What are you talking about?" Sarutobi asked, "I don't have any favorites."

"Yes you do. You knew Tsunade from before. That's why you knew her name and not mine nor Orochimaru's. She's obviously your favorite so just admit it."

"I only know her because she is the granddaughter of the First Hokage and I knew the Senju family very well. That doesn't make her my favorite."

"Oh." Jiraiya said feeling like an idiot for not thinking about that.

"If you want to be a good ninja, you have to stop falling for all those obvious traps." Sarutobi lectured, "I have no doubt in my mind that you can become a splendid ninja. You just have to train harder and find your purpose for being a ninja." He explained.

Before the sun set that day, Jiraiya was released from the confinements of the stump and was free to go home. His parents wondered why he went home so late, but he was too embarrassed to tell them that he was the only one of his team who failed to get a bell on their very first test. His father was thrilled to hear that Tsunade was on his team, but little did he know that she hated every bone in his son's body. Jiraiya decided to heed Sarutobi's words and discover his purpose for being a ninja. It didn't take him too long to come to the conclusion that sweeping girls off their feet with his awesome ninja skills was his purpose of being a ninja. It was pitiful, but at the time, that's what he thought was his purpose. One day, he hoped that he could win over Tsunade, and for years he held onto that hope.

That day was one of the most memorable days in his life. Even though he was the weakest link, he felt a sense of belonging when he was with his team. They faced life and death situations together, fought together, laughed together, and had each other's backs. They were like siblings when everything seemed to be so simple, but they were all grown up now, and walking different paths. Jiraiya was trying to find his true destiny, Tsunade was trying to live her life and survive with Shizune, and Orochimaru was walking down a path of destruction and pure evil. How times have changed.

Jiraiya put his pen down, and walked out onto the small patio of his cottage. He gazed out onto the field and admired the beauty of the lush greenery, the chirping birds, and the fluttering butterflies. The world was truly an amazing, beautiful place, and he had a first hand experience of it all in his backyard. How he wished he could share it with his childhood friends.

From that day on, memories of different events of his childhood invaded his mind. He thought that he could escape it all, but it turns out that no matter where he went, or how far away from the village he ventured, his memories would still be fresh in his mind. One does not simply forget about the most memorable time in their lives, no matter how much he tried, he would never forget. His memories followed him everywhere and refused to leave him alone.

He returned to his desk to continue to write in his solitude. Despite the fact that he was fully engrossed in what he was writing, images of his childhood self flashed before his very eyes. For the first time in a long time, he didn't feel alone. He was by himself, but his memories kept him company. A smile graced his face, and he continued to write with his memories ever present.

So that was a Jiraiya filled chapter.

I hope you enjoyed reading it because trust me, once I started to write this chapter, I couldn't stop.

Thanks for reading and remember to leave a review.

Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo