Chapter 6: Love and Loss

Bella's POV

I wanted her back. I wanted my back. That's all I ever wanted in life, of afterlife in my case, now. A long time ago, when Edward disappeared for six months, it was so painful that I felt as if a hole had been punched right through my chest. That was the most excruciating pain that I had ever been through in my life. I had thought, believed with all my heart even, that that was the worst kind of pain I could ever experience. I didn't realize how wrong I was. That there was another worse pain that I would experience. Worst and much longer lasting and that would be losing my daughter. My sweet, innocent, little baby girl.

My beautiful Renesmee. My little nudger. I loved her from the moment I found out that she was on her way. I protected her from the family when they wanted to abort her. I was and still am willing to die for her if it were ever choice between her and I.

When the Volturi came for her there was no doubt in my mind that I would die if it meant saving her life. For me there was no choice. Thankfully it didn't come down to a fight and we were left to live in peace.

For the next few months we were allowed to live our lives in peace. Nessie's aging had slowed down a bit and I made no mistake about how happy I was about that. It meant that I got to enjoy Nessie's childhood that much longer.

When her first birthday came around she resembled a five year old human girl. Alice of course went all out for her birthday and invited so many people that I didn't even remember the exact number. Just give Alice a reason to throw a party and she will go all out. Well she used to anyway. Nessie's first birthday was the last party that the Cullen family had ever thrown. Why would we have party when an important member of our family was missing? Why when sadness plagued our hearts?

I still remembered the day she went missing as if it were only yesterday. We'd all gone hunting that day and left Emmett to babysit Nessie. Nessie has been more than happy to stay home and play with the new puppy Carlisle and Esme had just given her for her birthday. A chocolate Labrador she had named Hershey because of how much she loved Hershey's chocolate bars.

When we got home that night Emmett was scared to death. Right away I noticed that Nessie wasn't there. The puppy was there but there was no Nessie.

Flashback

"Emmett where is Nessie?"

Emmett didn't answer. He only got more nervous.

I felt Edward suddenly get tense by my side. His expression quickly went from calm to angry.

"You left her at the park?!" Edward screamed.

"What?" I asked.

"This idiot took our daughter to the park and left her there by herself because he didn't want to stay with her! When he went back to get her she wasn't there anymore!"

"You did what?! You left my one year old daughter at the park by herself?!"

"and now she's missing. Our baby girl is missing because this idiot couldn't-"

I didn't hear the rest of what my husband said because in that moment I lost it. I almost killed Emmett that day. Edward almost killed him too. Even Rosalie went after her husband. She loved Nessie like a daughter and went she went missing Rosalie reacted the same way I did.

Jacob, when he found out what happened later that night, wolfed out instantly and tore Emmett to pieces. I didn't exactly try to stop Jacob either. I'd never seen Jacob that angry before but when it came to Nessie, his imprint, he would do anything for her. To know she was possibly in danger because of Emmett brought out something in Jacob that I'd never seen before.

After that Emmett went missing for a week while we searched for Nessie. When he finally did return we tried to kill him again. We tried to kill Emmett many times. If it weren't for Carlisle and Esme being there to keep the peace we probably would've succeeded. Keeping Emmett safe from us basically became a full time job for them.

End Flashback

For the past 12 years Emmett has been full of guilt. He never forgave himself for what he did. His guilt almost drove Jasper insane. At least I knew he felt terrible for the part he played in my daughter's disappearance.

Even when she stopped trying to kill Emmett she still punished him. Let's just say they didn't have sex for ten years.

We never stopped searching for her. We knew she was alive because of Jacob. The imprint connection was alive and well. If she died he would know in his heart instantly. So for years we searched to no avail.

That is until a few days ago. When Kate sent me an email with a link to a certain YouTube video that's gone viral.

The shock we all felt when we saw the video was indescribable. There she was, on the screen, all grown up now trying to find her family. Trying to find us.

She looked so much like me and Edward that there was no doubt in my mind that she was our daughter. Even if she hadn't described the vague memories she had of us I would've easily believed she was our Nessie.

Since she was in Florida it wasn't exactly an easy place to go visit with all the sunshine. So Jacob volunteered to go first and make sure that it was her. Though there really was no doubt in my mind that it was her. He'd know for sure as soon as he saw her if she was his imprint or not.

He arrived yesterday and we were supposed to get a phone call from him last night with the verdict. Only he hadn't called and I was getting more and more annoyed with each passing minute.

I growled in annoyance. Hershey looked up at me but he had long gotten used to our more animal like tendencies. The dog was 12 years old now and riddled with arthritis. Edward had wanted to get rid of the dog but I would not allow that. This was our daughter's dog. I was not going to get rid of anything that belonged to her. Besides that dog had a way of providing comfort in a way no other person had. Even Edward eventually grew to love Hershey.

"That's it I'm calling him," I said to no one in particular.

I picked up the phone and dialed Jacob's number.

"Jacob? Why didn't you call? You were supposed to call last night? Is it really her? Is it really my da-"

"It's not Jacob," I was shocked to hear a woman's voice on the other line.

"What who are you?" The very idea of Jacob hanging out with another girl was enough to get me angry when he was supposed to be looking for Nessie.

"My name's Renesmee. Jacob and I were out on a date last night and somehow we switched phones,"

I went dead silent. Everyone stopped what they were doing wherever they were in the house. Carlisle was about to leave for work and froze just as he was about to walk out the door. Esme had been sweeping and now stood frozen with the broom in her hand. Edward had been playing the piano and now sat frozen in time. Literally everyone was frozen in shock.

My hand started shaking. I didn't know what to do or think or even how to react. My daughter, after so many years, I was hearing my daughter's voice talking to me.

"Hello?" she spoke. "Oh my God you're his girlfriend aren't you?! I'm sorry I didn't know I swear-"

"No. No I'm not his girlfriend. It's okay. We're just really good friends,"

"Oh," she sounded relieved. "Yeah it's a long story but somehow we switched phones last night. If you really need to talk to him I could give you my number,"

"Yes, that would be great," I still couldn't believe that I was talking to my daughter. I didn't even care what we were talking about. I just wanted to keep hearing her voice.

"Hey Renesmee any chance you're going to see Jacob again today?"

"Yeah I'm going to see if we could meet up again today so we could switch our phones back,"

Good. I thought to myself. I would call Jacob and have him stall her there so when we got there tonight we could see her. Because as soon as I hung up this phone I would be buying plane tickets.

I heard someone calling for her in the background.

"Look I have to go now. My mom is calling me. Nice talking to you though,"

Her words pierced right through my chest. Hearing her call someone else mom was like a stab wound. I wanted to shout to her that I was her mother and I always wanted her but I had to stop myself. No matter how painful it was.

"It's really her," I said as soon as the line went dead.

"So that settles it then," Carlisle said. "We're heading out there today,"

"We're going to see our granddaughter again?" Esme sounded as emotional as I felt.

"We're going to see my daughter again," I felt like I was about to cry. A second later Edward's arms were wrapped around my body.

"We're going to get our daughter back," he said. "Oh and I'm going to kill Jacob as soon as I see him,"

"Edward Cu-"

"Leave that mutt alone for twenty four hours and he manages go on a date with my daughter," he growled.

I sighed. Some things will never change.

Please Review