CHAPTER 6: Taking Back Equestria
Blahsadfeguie, Hailstorm, Applejack, and Fluttershy emerged from the Ponyville side of the tunnel, one after the other, for what they hoped would be the last time. From behind the wall of sunflowers, Blah surveyed the landscape. Poking above the treeline of Sweet Apple Acres, he could barely make out the large purple canopy of the library where the corruption had supposedly originated.
"It is time, comrades!" Blah said dramatically, his new weapons and armor granting him more confidence than ever. "Today, we rid Ponyville of the corruption, once and for all, returning its innocent people back to their peaceful ways!"
Hail groaned internally at Blah's overwhelmingly cheesy heroic voice, but he couldn't deny that it was somewhat inspiring.
Applejack stepped forward, raring to go as well. "So, as long as y'all advance slowly and carefully," she proposed, "me and Fluttershy should be able to keep up and handle things on the ground, right?"
"Slowly? Carefully?" repeated Blah in his same over-the-top voice. "As if! We're just going to plow our way through to the library and get it over with! Having to wait for someone on the ground would just slow us down, don't you think?" Applejack grimaced, but Blah continued. "Besides, sending everyone in at once is just begging for trouble. You should probably stay here and stand by, so that on the off-chance that things go badly, you can rush in and rescue us."
Applejack had to think about Blah's take for a moment. "Well... all right," she nodded. "I would rather turn everyone to normal as fast as we can, and if it doesn't work out, it's good to have a backup plan."
"Fluttershy can still come, can't she?" asked Hail. "She can fly, and she does have the armor."
"Oh, that's okay, really," denied Fluttershy, backing into the doorway of the barn. "I could never leave Applejack here alone. And I'm not really a fighter. I would only slow you down even more."
"That is true," Blah bluntly agreed. "We can do this just fine by ourselves, right Hail?"
Although having already accepted the fact, Fluttershy couldn't help but look away slightly at the impact of Blah's rough remark. Applejack put a foreleg around her. "Aw, don't feel bad, sugarcube," she consoled. "Not everypony belongs on the front lines. Sometimes, the supporters are just as important."
Blah remained indifferent. Hail sighed. "Blah, remind me to give you a little talk later," he scolded. "For now, can we please just get to saving Ponyville?"
"Of course," the man replied. He strapped his silver hammer to his back, grasping his lance with both hands. "Now, I want you to go straight for the treehouse, directing me and my lance towards any and all hostiles on the way. The more we take out now, the less we potentially have to deal with later."
"I hope you're not planning to hit everything with that lance," Fluttershy worried. "Remember, we're trying to cure the ponies, not... kill them."
Blah laughed nervously. "Ahaha, yeah, I know that! I'll just give them a smack with the hammer if they get in our way. That should leave them mostly intact, right?"
"Just..." Hail wanted desperately to end this conversation. He figured he'd have no trouble remembering on his own to pick it back up again later. "Just hop on, already, and let's go." He bent his knees, bracing himself as he waited for Blah to mount him.
Blah did so, this time more carefully as to give Hail a chance to take off. Hail began to flap his wings, and, much to everyone's surprise, the two of them gradually rose.
"Think you can keep it up?" questioned Blah, shifting his lance to his dominant hand and holding on with his other.
"Don't worry," panted the pegasus, "the lifting is the hard part. Once we get going, our inertia will carry us."
"Good luck!" called Applejack. "Holler if y'all need us!"
Once Hail reached a comfortable enough height over the purple grass, he accelerated forward at a brisk pace. They were off; Blah and Hail, knight and horse, hammer and crossbow, marching into battle to vanquish evil and save the lives of the innocent.
They didn't have to spend long in the corrupted village before several eaters sprung up, having waited for their opportunity to strike. Hail charged at them one at a time, Blah fine-tuning his aim to run through each one, vanquishing most of them in one strike. Hail had his boomerang at the ready to finish off any stragglers. Together, they managed to eliminate most of their immediate threats on route to the giant tree near the center of town.
Blah had never felt more alive. This was an experience far from that of the game of Terraria he had originally played, and yet it still felt like a video game that he had suddenly figured out how to conquer. He was so engrossed in destroying all in his path that he nearly forgot to lower his weapon when a corrupted pegasus swooped at them.
Luckily, Hail caught Blah and dove abruptly out of the way, snapping the human back to reality. "The hammer, Blah!" Hail forcefully reminded him. "If anything, use the hammer!"
Blah reached for his hammer, but paused as he spotted another small group of eaters approaching rapidly. 'Dang, I can't waste time swapping weapons every two seconds,' he thought. 'I'll have to dual wield...' He quickly switched his lance to his left hand, drawing his hammer in his right. Hailstorm also decided to switch to his crossbow, firing a few shots at the distant eaters while he dodged around the pegasus. With one solid swing, Blah smashed the wing of the corrupted pony, sending them to the ground in a non-lethal fashion.
With their strategy sorted out, Hail flew higher in the air, evading the malicious earth ponies and unicorns below entirely. He unloaded several bolts into oncoming eaters while Blah smacked away anything that got too close.
A barrel shot into the air, surrounded by tainted magic. A few unicorns had the idea of using their magic as anti-air defenses. The barrel socked Hail right in the jaw. "Ow! Hey!" he shouted. "Blah, watch out for projectiles from below!"
Blah looked down in time to see a cart full of pies and cupcakes heading straight for them. Blah, expecting a more conventional projectile, was confused, leaving it up to Hail to swerve out of the way. Blah hastily swung his hammer just as it came within range, causing the cart to explode into a cloud of wooden planks which fell back down to the ground. A pie kept going and hit Blah in the face.
"Argh, I can't see!" muffled Blah. "It's delicious, but I can't see!" Thanks to his supposedly clever dual-wielding tactic, any attempts to remove the pie with his occupied hands resulted in his weapons getting in the way.
Hail was forced to pull out his crossbow to hold off some more eaters while Blah used his tongue to knock the pie off of his face. It bounced off of Hail's head, causing him to miss a shot. The Eater of Souls was heading straight for them.
Blah managed to wipe the excess pie filling off of his face with the edge of his sleeve just in time to react to the derelict eater, stabbing it with his lance. With a flick of his wrist, the dead being was flung off of the lance and sent at an oncoming corrupt pegasus, buying Blah enough time to whack it out of the sky with his hammer.
"There's the library..." Hail pointed out. The large, hollowed-out tree that served as the town's library was practically glowing with an aura of chilling death. It was easily the most evil structure in Ponyville.
"Oh yeah, there's our ticket," Blah affirmed. "Land us on the balcony."
Hail nodded and swooped down for a landing. Before they could get near, a one-eyed ten-foot worm, with a head closely resembling the eaters, leaped out of the ground and lunged at Hail. The pegasus instinctively ducked under the sudden threat, putting Blah in the perfect position to run through half of the behemoth's body segments in one swift thrust of his lance. Blah watched it collapse to the ground.
"Hey, if you picked up that Devourer's teeth, we could probably use them to make unholy bolts," Blah pointed out.
"No time," Hail refused as he closed in on the balcony. "We're already here, and haven't we done enough 'upgrading' already?"
Blah had nothing to say to that. They landed, and the doors were already open. Blah dismounted, granting Hail much needed relief, and the two entered the upper room of the library.
Much like the exterior of the tree, the wooden floors and walls of the room had turned purple and partially rotten. With the sun dimmed and the room deserted, there was little light with which to see. Some of the weakened bookshelves had collapsed under the weight of the books. The bed was in a state of utter disarray, and some of the tables had toppled over, indicating that a brief struggle had taken place at some point.
"I've been waiting for you, Blahsadfeguie... and Hailstorm..."
The voice echoed throughout the building, but there was not a soul to be seen. The voice sounded familiar to both Blah and Hail. It was feminine and profound, but with a dark undertone they hadn't heard before.
"Oh God, don't tell me..." Blah whispered as the stairs creaked, slowly and patiently.
The first thing that the adventurers saw was a horn, indicating that the pony that ascended the stairs was a unicorn. Her coat was a dark purple, and her mane was black as night, striped with magenta. Her eyes were completely white and her cutie mark was a large six-pointed star. Although the color scheme was different, Blah and Hail easily recognized the unicorn before them. They were both well aware of her magical capabilities, and dreaded to see them used for evil purposes.
"I have consumed this region, and the souls of all within," the unicorn spoke. "And I will not stop until the entire world has surrendered its souls to me. For being so foolish to come here... you two will be next!"
Hail hovered in the air, his crossbow at the ready. Blah held his ground, putting away his lance for the time being and gripping his warhammer with both hands. It was clear that Twilight Sparkle was nowhere near her right mind.
"Twilight," Hail pleaded, putting off fighting what used to be the good-natured and well-respected scholar, "I know you're still in there. You can't let this corruption consume you! You have to fight it! Think of all the innocent lives, your neighbors and friends, you're hurting!"
Blah hardly believed that he was seeing that sort of tactic with his own eyes. "Hail, I don't know if that's going to work," he warned the pegasus.
The corrupted unicorn cackled evilly, unfazed by Hail's speech. "Believe me, the Twilight you know is long gone. Her only salvation from the corruption... is death!"
Both of them were reluctant to fight, retaining some hope that whatever possessed Twilight was lying, but they didn't have much of a choice at this point. They watched her closely, waiting for her to make the first move.
Despite their concentration, Twilight had already managed to elude their sights. Before either of them could begin to look around, Blah felt a hard kick from his back and was knocked to the ground. It didn't take him long to realize that Twilight had teleported behind him for a surprise attack.
As Blah peeled himself off of the floor, thankful for his new armor, Hail swiftly shot a bolt from his silver crossbow. But before it could hit its mark, Twilight disappeared again and flip-kicked Hail from above, slamming him through the upper floor of the library.
She landed deftly and turned towards Blah, who was on his feet again and charging with the hammer. He swung, but he still hadn't gotten the hang of Twilight's strategy yet. She appeared behind him again and swept under his feet, grounding him again, and then she proceeded to surround him with telekinetic energy.
Unable to move, Blah could only panic as he was helplessly tossed around the room, slamming into bookshelves and other furniture. 'Now I... know how a... ragdoll feels,' he thought between bursts of pain.
Hail recovered as quickly as he could, driven by his desire to stop the vile forces in control of the town. Pulling out his boomerang, he flew up through the hole in the floor. Watching Blah getting beaten like that was a gruesome sight, which only served to strengthen his throw. With her back turned, Twilight was unable to keep from being clocked in the head, causing her to lose her concentration. Blah flopped to the ground, his entire being limp yet still conscious.
She turned her head at Hail, the sheer coldness of her stare freezing Hail in place. Blah stood up dizzily, practically leaping at Twilight from behind, but she easily saw this coming and bucked him right in the jaw, causing him to flip over and crash.
By the time Hail finally regained his senses and drew back his boomerang, Twilight's horn glowed again. He threw the boomerang, hoping to ruin her concentration, but it was deflected by a book tossed in from the side. Hail raised an eyebrow, but soon he registered what was happening - the entirety of the library's stock was swirling around the room, creating a book tornado which gained speed rapidly.
The books pelted Blah and Hail over and over, eventually removing both of their iron helmets, not to mention Blah's glasses. The barrage did not end there. Both heroes were driven to the ground, at which point Twilight gathered all of the books into two large lumps and slammed them into each of her foes.
"You didn't spend enough time hitting the books," Twilight boasted, "so it looks like they've had to hit you!"
Blah wasn't sure what hurt worse - the impact from all the heavy books, or Twilight's terrible taunt. With newfound resolve, Blah reached around the books in which he was buried and snatched a potion from his belt, chugging it. He exploded out of the book pile with his returned strength. "Hey, making bad jokes is my thing." He pulled out his lance, dual-wielding again, and glared vengefully into Twilight's blank eyes. "I'm done going easy on you."
"Your soul is quite feisty," commented Twilight. "And feisty is my favorite flavor."
She galloped at Blah, lunging at the last second. Blah wound up and swung his hammer to intercept her, but she had anticipated this, teleporting behind him just before the hammer would have struck its target.
'Fool me once, shame on you,' thought Blah, as he followed through with the hammer's momentum, spinning all the way around and bashing her in the side. With a satisfying wham, Blah had just scored the first solid connection in the entire match.
Twilight stumbled backward clumsily, one of her forelegs having been dislocated from the blow. Even so, she didn't visibly react to the pain - she merely popped it back into place, pivoted a few times, and proceeded once again to charge.
Blah cringed. He knew Twilight was possessed, but he couldn't imagine anyone simply shrugging off such a painful injury. He regained himself as he pulled out the lance and held it straight out, knowing that she wouldn't be dumb enough to run right into it. He had his hammer poised and ready in case she tried to relocate herself again.
There was one strategy he didn't count on, however. Instead of evading or teleporting, Twilight grabbed the lance telekinetically and yanked it straight out of Blah's grasp. Caught off-guard, Blah couldn't stop her from continuing on to pounce into him and knock him over. She trampled him, hopping past him with the lance in tow and turned around, waiting for him to get back up.
Blah hopped to his feet, quite upset at this point. He prepared to charge her himself, but froze up when he saw that Twilight had positioned the lance right over herself as if some kind of ghost knight were on her back. The thought of being impaled by his own weapon didn't really appeal to Blah.
Hail finally managed to punch a hole through his own book pile, just in time to see Twilight start charging. He chugged down a potion of his own, thankful that Blah had given him one before entering the Corruption, and rushed ahead with a well-aimed boomerang.
The boomerang collided with the lance just as Blah was about to attempt to dive away, causing her to lose hold of it long enough for Blah to snatch it up in his hands. He spun away from the charging unicorn, who was now preoccupied with skidding to a halt behind him.
Not one to waste an opportunity such as this, the first thing he did was flip the lance around and stab behind himself between his arm and left side. Some slight resistance told him that his prediction had been spot-on, and when he retracted his weapon, he heard a large object flop to the ground behind him, coupled with some anguished sputtering.
He refused to turn around and survey his handiwork, but there was no need; he knew that he had just inflicted a mortal wound on the corrupted unicorn. What he wasn't certain of was whether or not he had done the right thing.
Blah glanced up at Hailstorm, whose gaze was transfixed on their unfortunate opponent behind him. "Blah..." Hail was practically speechless.
The man sighed. As much as the thought of looking sickened him, he had to at least be certain that whatever spirit dwelled within her was slain as well. Gulping, he craned his head around, letting the collapsed pony come into view.
The wound had been a clean, deep stab from the stomach and through the ribcage, through which fresh blood slowly pooled out. Blah felt something creep up in the back of his throat. Fighting to keep his senses, he examined the body closer. Sure enough, the dark colors had just finished draining, leaving Twilight looking more or less just as he remembered, albeit slightly pale. Blah also noticed that she was still breathing heavily and her eyes were half-open, still conscious. 'The spirit is gone... There's still hope...' Blah thought as he hastily reached into his backpack.
"Twilight... I'm sorry..." Hail started, rushing to her side.
She coughed. "It's not your fault..." she reassured him, her voice strained and quiet. "Blame... him... the Eater of Worlds..."
The name didn't surprise Blah in the slightest. The Eater of Worlds was the boss of the Corruption, which he had killed many times over during his Terraria career. Hail, however, was a little bit intimidated.
"But... We didn't mean to..."
Twilight gazed weakly up at Hail. "It had to be done."
'It doesn't have to end this way...' Blah thought, fishing for the last lesser healing potion in his bag. He brushed past stone, wood, and slime gel before his hand clasped around a glass bottle. "Aha!" He yanked it out and dashed to Twilight. "Drink this, quickly!"
"Oh right... Forgot about that..." Hail exhaled a sigh of relief as Twilight drank the potion unquestioningly. The wound promptly closed. Twilight shakily placed her hooves underneath her, and Hail quickly helped her stand up. It wasn't a complete heal by any means, but the potion had saved her life.
"Thank you..." said Twilight. "I was afraid I'd have to accept my fate... but it looks like you've thought of everything!"
"Hmm, clever little foals you are..."
The three looked up. Hovering above Twilight was a darkened ball of pulsating energy, with two stubby arm-like appendages and two large, red eyes. "You get to have your cake, and eat it too! But the cake isn't true just yet!"
"Uh..." Blah scratched his head. For the first time since his arrival, Blah had been completely clueless. This entity was not something that he knew existed in either Terraria or Equestria. Judging from Hail's wide-eyed expression, Blah was not alone, but Twilight certainly recognized the spirit.
"That's what you think. I won't fall for your sinister tricks again, and this time I have assistance! It's over, Ipsus!"
'Ipsus?!' Blah repeated in his head. Unlike his own, this name clicked, opening a small treasure trove of memories. He recalled spending a lot of time in his younger days experimenting with writing fiction, and Ipsus was one of the many characters he had created. A spirit in the form of a small orb, he had the ability to possess any living being, provided his will could overpower that of his victim. However, he had a knack for fooling them into accepting his dominance regardless.
Ipsus laughed. "Oh, but it has only just begun, my dear mare."
Blah's mouth wrinkled. If a character of his own creation appeared in this strange world, there was no telling what other kinds of things it had. Were elements of other fictional worlds involved? Were there more of his own creations, or the creations of others? There was no way to tell for sure without exploring further himself, but something about Ipsus struck his curiosity.
"...if I may ask a question," Blah interrupted, "before you proceed to devour our souls or whatever, why have you suddenly become so evil? Last I remember, you were a neutral spirit, whose only goals were to cause harmless mischief and pranks."
"I'm glad you asked," laughed Ipsus. "You see, power isn't something that wants to be taken for granted. Power is something that I've had for a while, ever since you created me. The power to overtake, to consume the very essence of any living being. I grew an appetite, Blahsadfeguie. A hunger for souls. And I won't rest until I have satiated that craving!"
The response shocked Blah, as it was not something he expected to hear from his character. On top of that, Ipsus was apparently aware that Blah had created him, a fact that was truly astonishing.
"Wait, wait," exclaimed Twilight, somewhat angrily. "You created this monster?!"
A knot formed in the pit of Blah's stomach as he felt the credibility he had just gained slip away. "Well, sort of," Blah muttered. "But I had no idea he was even real, let alone that he would turn evil!"
"Uh, guys," Hailstorm cut in, "Might want to keep an eye on the evil spirit..."
Everyone looked at where Ipsus used to be. He wasn't there anymore.
The ground shook. The floor suffered from yet another hole as something huge sprouted out of it, something massive, purple, and wormlike, with each segment on its body having multiple eyes. The only difference between the individual segments and its head was the two gigantic mandibles sprouting from it, which twitched hungrily. Ipsus's voice boomed from deep within it.
"Behold... my loyal servant, The Eater of Worlds!"