Hey there! So, it turns out one of my friends is making a comic based off of this fic. You can find a link to her DA page on my profile, if you want to check it out. We'd both appreciate that very much. :L
CHAPTER 26: Breaking the Ice
Every time a question even gets close to being answered, another one comes up... usually two... and there's always the slightest feeling that everything I've seen is familiar me to in some way, but I can't quite place my finger on it...
There was a soft, pounding rhythm where Astra's feet hit the cobblestone as she dashed back to the square. Blah sat up and put a hold on his thoughts, removing the arm from propping up his chin. "Any news?"
Astra proceeded to tell Blah and the eavesdropping Derpy Hooves everything she and Toadsworth had determined. Blah raised his eyebrows inquisitively.
"I'm willing to bet this new ally of Bowser's has one of the jewels, or at least knows where it is," Blah inferred. "There's definitely something about it they want to keep a secret, and god dang it I am going to beat the secrets out of them if I have to." He stood up.
"Any idea who this mysterious ally might be?" Astra prompted.
"Doesn't ring any bells..." Blah answered. "It doesn't sound too harmless though. I think we'll be fine."
"Hmm..." Astra hesitated, not too convinced of that. "So I suppose that settles it?"
"Yep." Blah double-checked his backpack and his weapons. He figured he might need to stock up on potions, but other than that he was satisfied with his gear. "We should make one last stop in Blahtown and get some more ciders," Blah recommended, heading for his cloud. "Shouldn't take long with this ba-where did it go."
The Nimrod wasn't there. Blah stared at the empty space where he left it and blinked. He turned towards Astra, who gave him a shrug. He then looked at Derpy, who smiled an innocent, sheepish smile.
"Uh... sorry," said a shaky, familiar voice from behind him. Blah turned around to see Bo-bobo in a withered stance, nervously tapping his fingers together. "I kinda... kept betting it in poker and eventually I lost it."
"Whee! This is fun!" The cloud zipped around above them, being ridden by a pink shape that was hard to make out from that distance.
Blah slowly turned to look at Bo-bobo, rage building in his face. "You... REALLY don't know when to quit, do you?"
"But I was on a roll..." whined the Hajikelist. "I was doing perfectly fine until this character showed up..."
Blah squinted at the cloud again. He was only partially surprised when he finally identified the new proud owner of the flying cloud - Pinkie Pie.
"Wheeee!" squealed Pinkie again. "This is almost the most fun I've ever had EVER! I wonder, do ALL clouds do this or just the yellow ones? I've always wanted to find out but I'm not a pegasus so I never could! Sometimes I wish I were a pegasus so I could fly around and bounce off of clouds but I'm doing that now so I guess I don't even need to dream anymore!"
That wasn't even the end of it, but Blah could barely hear her through his facepalm. "PLEASE tell me you have some other way to travel," Blah strained.
"Well, I do have this..." Bo-bobo reached into his afro and pulled out some kind of stick with an indentation in the middle. He grabbed it with both hands and pulled the stick, extending it and creating several holographic lines underneath it. Bo-bobo took a running start forward as the lines continued to form in the shape of a motorcycle, and by the time he was at full speed the motorcycle was completely solid and he was perched atop it, zooming off into the distance.
"Ack, wait a minute, I don't know how to stop this thiiiiiing..." Bo-bobo disappeared into the horizon.
"I don't know about you," Astra commented, awe-struck, "but it looks to me like he abandoned us... on purpose..."
"Well," said Blah with a heavy sigh, "that's Bo-bobo for you. Now come on, we gotta find some other way to get around..."
"That shouldn't be too hard, considering we're in a town full of sentient mounts."
"Yes, which means they have feelings," countered Blah. "And lives. I doubt we'll find any willing to carry us."
"Ahem!"
Blah and Astra's gaze shifted collectively downward onto a certain senior toad leading two saddled, miniature big-nosed dinosaurs. "It was the best we could do on such short notice. I do hope they will suffice." Toadsworth placed his hands behind his back triumphantly.
"Yoshi!" greeted the purple one.
"Yosh," acknowledged the orange one.
Blah stared with wide eyes, at the orange Yoshi in particular. There was something about this Yoshi, some aura of mellow coolness that he couldn't quite place his finger on, and he could see a glimpse of profoundness behind those eyes. But he seemed... out of place, like he was lacking... direction, or satisfaction. The orange Yoshi was incomplete, and Blah had a good idea of just what he needed.
"Erm, Master Blah..." Toadsworth said, ignoring the strangeness of slipping the word "blah" into his normally sophisticated vernacular.
"Sunglasses," he muttered.
"I beg your pardon?" Toadsworth continued.
"I... need... sunglasses."
Astra gave Blah a weird look. "...I don't think playing dress-up is going to rescue Twi-"
"SUNGLASSES. ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY. MUST ACQUIRE." He poised his leg and arms as if he were about to sprint the sprint of his life, but froze mid-pose and turned to Derpy. "Would you kindly point me towards the Carousel Boutique?"
"Why, it's right over that way," Derpy cooperated nonchalantly, pointing a hoof at a heavily-decorated building.
"Thanks bye!" He resumed his mad charge towards the Boutique. The orange Yoshi discreetly examined the startled expressions of the onlookers, and casually followed in Blah's wake, getting an uncanny feeling that maybe he was on to something. Having nowhere else to go, Astra, Toadsworth, Derpy, and the other Yoshi lagged behind.
Blah practically barged into the Carousel Boutique, shaking the entire shop and causing a white-coated unicorn to slip and mis-stitch some threading on a dress. "Sunglasses! Do you carry sunglasses?"
"Wha- have you any manners?" stammered the unicorn, hastily fixing the mistake in her sewing. "Being the local hero isn't an excuse for improper conduct! At least have the decency to apologize."
"Sorry, Rarity, but this is really urgent!" Blah explained, letting the Yoshi enter the room. "This Yoshi needs sunglasses, stat!"
Rarity keenly eyed the Yoshi up and down. Her eyes narrowed as she placed the Yoshi in a mental picture frame, adding sunglasses and probably other accessories from what Blah could tell. Suddenly, she perked up. "Ahh, why didn't you tell me it was a matter of fashion?" she mused, her attitude making a complete U-turn. "Never you mind about your earlier behavior. Please, come with me."
Blah grinned with excitement, but Yoshi was somewhat disturbed at the way Rarity looked him over. Both of them, with varying degrees of enthusiasm, followed Rarity into a back room.
The room was full of racks upon racks of glasses, hats, earrings, necklaces, and other accessories, all organized in a delicate display. Blah, of course, wasn't paying much attention to the room itself. He examined the sunglasses curiously. Most of them were a bit too fancy or feminine, but there were a few that-
"Ah ah ah, don't you move a muscle!" Rarity snatched the sunglasses before Blah could even reach for the pair he was contemplating. "I'll be the judge of this endeavor, thank you very much! And, judging by that silly, drab metal suit you're wearing, you would benefit from a professional opinion. Now, be a dear and hold still."
"Well, clearly you have a better look for me that's just as practical," Blah drawled sarcastically as Rarity previewed various pairs of glasses over the Yoshi's eyes. The reptilian mount wasn't entirely fond of being a living mannequin, but he reluctantly held still. Perhaps it would all pay off in the end.
"I'm sure I could come up with something, given enough time," Rarity replied, having mastered the art of background chatter whilst doing other work. "I've had a bit of practice designing armor for Princess Celestia's royal guards once. It was a design that, sadly, was scrapped in favor of- AHA!"
Rarity stopped, resting the umpteenth pair of sunglasses on the Yoshi's nose. It was a sharp pair, both literally and figuratively, the lenses narrow triangles pointing towards the sky's horizon. Or where it would be if they weren't indoors, at least.
Blah and Rarity admired the new Yoshisona with intense fascination, and the two momentarily shared the same train of thought.
"That charisma, that character!" Rarity swooned.
"That style, that... awesomeness!" Blah marveled.
"We have just witnessed the birth of... of..."
"Broshi!"
Through a cool, shaded filter, the newly-christened Broshi viewed the environment with an attitude that perfectly reflected his true nature. If he had to guess, he'd approximate the improvement to his impressiveness at around one fifth greater than it was prior. Possibly more.
He gave his witnesses a slight nod to indicate his approval, and both Blah and Rarity practically melted. Surely now, he'd have no problems getting the attention of...
"Whoa!"
Blah's confused cohorts had finally caught up to him, and the first one to react to the new 'shi was none other than the old one. The purple specimen was star-struck by the sight of her orange likeness. Sure, they had known each other for quite some time now, and they had even grown up on the same side of the island. But now, he was like a completely different Yoshi to her... and yet the exact same.
"Yo," greeted Broshi, gazing at the object of his attention with his eyes barely peering over the top of his new eyewear, as if to convey that she was the only one that he cared to see unshrouded, the one beacon of light in an obscured reality.
Somehow, that one syllable was enough to convey an entire sonnet of feelings. With a language that lacked such descriptors, the Yoshi mind is one that has evolved around mutual understanding and empathy, and that knack was no less apparent with this couple. Tears welled in her eyes as she realized that all of the answers she had been searching for were right in front of her, pretty much her entire life. The two embraced, their combined emotion overwhelming everyone in the room. Even Rarity was speechless with awed wonder.
'If only love were that simple in my world,' lamented Blah.
- heedlessDeacon [HD] began pestering accomodatedDragon [AD] at 19:21 -
HD: why
HD: is there
HD: a hole
HD: in the ground
HD: and where
HD: is my piano
AD: Both of those questions are each others' answers.
AD: But you should probably focus on finding a weapon.
HD: i have a weapon what are you talking about
AD: That is a clarinet.
HD: a loud clarinet
HD: also watch me impale this sucker with it
HD: now that is what i call music
AD: That seems to have just made it angry.
AD: I don't think impaling it again is going to solve anything.
AD: Reed, there are more of them.
AD: You're surrounded.
HD: really now
HD: maybe you could do something
HD: youre a player not an announcer
AD: You saw what happened to the piano. I'd rather not get into this again.
HD: i dont really care anymore
HD: im in no position to care
AD: Are you sure?
HD: YES
HD: JUST HELP ME FOR TRIFFS SAKE
AD: Okay...
AD: There.
AD: Your tuba's a little dinged up, but no more holes in your house.
AD: Everything's perfectly fine!
HD: what do you mean a little dinged up
HD: that things a twisted heap now
HD: like how can you even mess up a tuba that much
AD: Everything's perfectly fine!
HD: sigh
AD: Now PLEASE go and get a better weapon.
AD: And pick up those blue things, they might be useful.
Angel Island slowed to a stop, hovering once again over its original location. Knuckles surveyed the surrounding ocean sunset with a sigh of relief.
"Finally, now maybe I can get some real rest..." Knuckles said, heading back to the central shrine.
"Did anyone else think it was kind of odd for the dragons to just flee like that, right after Blah and Astra left?" Tails asked, following him. "I mean, I know they were getting beaten, but the timing was nearly spot-on..."
"Yeah... it's almost like they didn't care about the island itself, or the Master Emerald," Sonic added.
"Why not, it's a beautiful vacation spot!" Jelly Jiggler chimed in.
"Why are you still here?" Knuckles glared at Jelly.
"Yeah, why ARE you still here?" Don Patch repeated. "You're a tuna! Go back to the ocean where you belong!"
"Aah! Yes sir!" Jelly hot-footed it to the edge of the island and jumped off, leaving Team Sonic to roll their eyes.
"Whatever," sighed Knuckles. "I just want to spend a normal night surrounded by my own culture for once. But, first things first." He approached a nearby echidna, who was regathering himself from the strenuous battle. "Hey. Make sure you guys clean up, and give our fallen brothers proper burials."
"Oh, um... about that." The echidna seemed a bit uncomfortable. "We had several casualties, but we couldn't find any bodies for some reason... Every echidna here is alive."
Knuckles's eyebrows furrowed. "What...? Are you sure?"
The echidna nodded. Knuckles turned to Sonic and Tails.
"Now, if you ask me, that's even more suspicious," Sonic commented.
"Why would anyone want to hide the victims of a war...?" Tails muttered to himself. "Or WHO would, for that matter... Those dragons left too quickly to do anything of the sort..."
"Argh, I'm not in the mood for this," Knuckles grumbled, his exhaustion overpowering his rage at the moment. "I'm going to sleep. I doubt we'll get attacked again anytime soon, but you should probably stick around just in case."
Blah studied the hastily-drawn map carefully. A toad from the relief squad had drawn the map as they traveled between the Mushroom Kingdom and Ponyville to get a feel for the new layout of the multiverse, as well as marking where Bowser's Castle was for him and Astra.
The tired sun was finally beginning to set over the western landscape. The terrain was rough and riddled with rocky hills and depressions through which grew very little grass, but the Yoshis were experts at climbing hills and jumping gaps even with a hundred pounds on their backs. There wasn't a lot of animal life, hostile or otherwise, either. It was serene and yet eerie at the same time.
The Yoshis' attitude certainly contributed to the former, however. Blah wasn't even aware that Yoshis could be female before ten minutes ago, and judging by Astra's awkward, tight posture, it was probably news to her as well. Neither mount seemed to mind, though.
Using his downtime, Blah thought back to the strange description of the new enemy that Astra mentioned. Small, floating, triangular, two blue arms... apparently intimidating... didn't sound like anything from any of the universes he had encountered...
Blah froze. He knew exactly what it was. It wasn't from any of these worlds. It was one of his own creations.
"Trank..." Blah muttered.
"Trank?" Astra asked.
"That's Bowser's new 'friend'..." He continued to look straight ahead with a broken stare. "Trank is an emotionless husk with zero remorse and the mindset of a hardened serial killer. His original purpose was as a means of balance, to take out anyone that was becoming too powerful regardless of alignment, calling them 'nubs'. However, he ended up developing a strong hatred for life in general, and he started using his power for his own selfish purposes. Now he sees everyone as a 'nub'."
"Wait... are you implying that you created him?" said a concerned Astra.
"Well, he was a fictional character..." Blah explained. "But I've seen a lot of my own 'fictional' characters come to life in this dimension. I can't believe I didn't think of Trank earlier... we really gotta hustle now. Peach and Twilight are in serious trouble, as are Hail, Sera, Applejack and Luigi... and probably Bowser as well..."
"...does Trank have an army of dragons?" Astra continued.
"Not that I'm aware of... although I do recall that at one point he had the ability to summon..." Blah froze again. "Meteors."
"So the meteors have nothing to do with that game, then?" Astra was getting more and more confused.
"I really don't know anymore," Blah shook his head. In fact, he was pretty sure he never knew to begin with. "But if the meteors were Trank's doing, then perhaps he does have some connection to the dragons after all..."
There was a bit of silence as Blah and Astra further pondered the possibilities in their heads. Their thoughts were violently interrupted, however, by a distant explosion that shook the very earth and loosened many rocks perched atop hills. Astra's Yoshi was particularly spooked.
"Whoa... another meteor?" Blah guessed.
"I think we would have seen a meteor falling from the sky," Astra discredited. "It sounded like it came from over there."
Broshi, followed reluctantly by his mate, quickly headed over towards the source of the explosion. They soon stumbled across a cave entrance, reinforced with man-made materials and with a track leading into it.
"A mineshaft? All the way out here?" Blah questioned.
"Take a look at this." Astra indicated a small, sleek purple car with an intricate yet menacing bumper and a black horizontal zig-zag decal on the hood. It didn't look like it could comfortably seat more than one or two people, but it did look as though it had seen some serious speed.
"Wario," Blah and Astra identified in tandem.
"I guess this is his mine..." Blah assessed. "Either that or he's stealing from it, using explosives... but anyway, I bet if we drove this to the castle, we'd get there in no time flat."
"Hey, stealing's our thing, bub. Get your own."
Blah craned around to meet face-to-face with one of the biggest, most imposing mustaches he had ever seen, second only to Dr. Eggman, attached to an angry dwarf of exaggerated girth. Behind him stood the third biggest mustache, carrying a large lumpy sack with his long, skinny arms.
"Oh, and Waluigi too, of course," Astra added nonchalantly.
"Hey Wario, isn't that the girl who was too good for your goods?" Waluigi goaded.
"Yeah, looks like her alright." Wario grinned darkly. "So, need something from us after all, eh?"
"No, absolutely not," replied Astra without skipping a beat. Nervousness began to gloss over her normally collected nature in the form of beads of sweat.
"What happened, now?" Blah asked, stepping off of Broshi in an attempt to threaten Wario and defend Astra. "Did you goons try to sell her something?"
"She wanted to build a rocket," Wario filled him in, "and, turns out, I know a guy. But she refused-a to buy any of my parts." Astra's gaze drifted groundward at the mention of the rocket.
"Well, knowing you guys, you probably tried to rip her off," Blah judged, his arms crossed in disgust.
"Did not!" Waluigi immediately defended, to Wario's chagrin. "...Wah, how do you know us exactly?"
"Long story," deterred Blah, cutting to the chase. "Now, we could really use a fast ride to Bowser's castle, no offense," he added to the Yoshis, "and I know that your car is pretty top-notch. Also, I have money. I think you know where I'm going with this."
"Hah. All right." Wario rubbed his mustache deviously. "But I want to hear it from HER first." He turned to Astra, barely able to contain his pride. "Tell me how much-a you NEED me right now."
"...You've got to be kidding," Astra bemoaned.
"Please just do it, the hostage pile isn't stopping from getting taller," Blah coaxed, trying to mask his impatience in order to comfort her - and not completely succeeding at both of those things.
Astra gave him a glare that said something along the lines of "it's not that simple". Meanwhile, Wario and Waluigi chortled to themselves.
Broshi lowered his glasses, flashing Astra a look of compassion. "Just swallow your pride, you'll be ok in the long run," said his soothing eyes in the chill voice of body language.
Astra swallowed literally, acting as a placebo for the metaphor, and she cleared her throat. Blah and Broshi were right; there were much more important things on her plate than her pride. "Wario, I need you right now, because without your help, at least six people will be in grave danger." She was almost as serious as she had always been.
There was a momentary silence. Even Wario was impressed, and his attempts to hide it weren't very fruitful. "...That's more like it," he reacted with a notable lack of enthusiasm. Astra felt a bit better knowing her request didn't give either of them the satisfaction they craved. "Now, let's-a talk travel fare..."