A/N: HEY GUYS! I finally have some energy and time to review another chapter. This upcoming week is going to be rather hectic, so if I don't post anything for a while I do apologize. If I do, then it'll probably only be one chapter, that day. But today, or rather Saturday and Sunday, I hope to post a few chapters… at least 1-2 tonight, and then more tomorrow. I've written a lot of chapters, so I need to start posting some of them.
And since a few more chapters have passed, I'd like to THANK you guys for following and liking my story. Especially to LordofWhore [wow what a name], mayfire21, nancywheeler, and AnimeLoverJS. Finally, I've begun to notice that here are several readers reading my story, and I cannot help but be enthusiastic about it! And I especially want to thank those who have commented me, personally [you know who you are], and I have enjoyed talking with you guys. It's nice to talk to the readers of the stories I'm involved in writing. It gives me a reason to keep going with the story I wish to create!
Lastly, because of some insight one of you guys told me, there have been a few tweaks to this story that I wasn't going to do, but decided to do anyways. And thanks to them, now I know why fake/our Ciel likes honey with milk, and why, from a different story I'm currently reading, a particular Phantomhive enjoys honey, too. I did try to do some research when it came to asthma, and while I don't have a personal experience with the ailment my father has it, but I'm not the biggest expert. So, if something sounds terribly wrong, you can tell me about it. I won't get mad. But, then again, for Clara, the whole 'curing/making people feel better' stuff is a by trial and error. While it'd be easy to just give Rachel or the younger twin an inhaler, that'd just make it too easy.
Maybe later, in the story. I was thinking of having an incident where that type of situation may occur, but it may not.
So… yeah! Anyways, THANK YOU GUYS for continuing to read this story. I hope you guys are enjoying your weekend, and hopefully I'll have another chapter posted soon!
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"Once again, I'm very sorry about this. I didn't want to take up your space or –"
"Not to worry! I am more curious to see what you plan on making," the much older woman smiled from behind you, and you nudged the little Phantomhive boy as he sat up high on a stool, watching you with a curious gaze while the woman glanced at the two of you, before continuing. "But, isn't it improper for a gentleman, let alone our young lord, to be cooking like this? There are maids and servants for a reason –"
"Let me put it this way, what if his little fiancée would like something cooked, and then he does a terrible job? Women love a man who cooks," you smirked over at the woman, before continuing. "It's nice for your man to do something for you, every once in a while. Besides, if he doesn't like to cook, he'll know that he's not very good at it ahead of time… Am I right Ciel?"
"Yes'um!" the boy exclaimed, giggling as he threw up his hands, and the head cook shook her head at you, but you ignored her silent remark.
But, under orders of her lord or just out of the goodness of her little heart, she and her helpers let you have part of the stovetop, and a nearby counter, as you showed the Phantomhive boy your super special recipe. Honestly, it's not too special, but it reminds you of home. Of your mum. Of the days when she'd make you her special homemade soup to make you feel better, after almost coughing up a lung. It took you a while to learn the recipe on your own… but, after a lot of searching through her old belongings, and actually finding an old recipe, you can officially say this 'make you feel better' soup is a family recipe.
And while you could tell the head cook wasn't exactly pleased with your presence in the kitchen, at least she seemed to be listening to what you wanted for this little lunch… or maybe, once again, it was her lord demanding her to make particular dishes, but whatever. You'll take this win and hopefully, this won't be a terrible disaster.
"Now, help me plop the onions, carrots, and chopped lettuce into the pot, hmm?" you asked the boy, and he giggled as he held up his hands, waiting for you to pick him up into your grasp with ease as you picked up your cutting board, handing the boy a wooden spoon while you hovered over the pot. "Now… be careful~. Go gently… it's okay to spill a little," you told him, letting the boy scrape most of the food into your pot, hearing the veggies sizzling and mixing in with the already browning meat, and you licked your lips at the heavenly smell while you gently placed the boy back onto the stool, before scraping the last bits into the pot and giving him a smirk. "Enjoying yourself?"
"Yes! This smells good!"
"Great, but you cannot eat it yet," you told him, poking his nose before you let the boy hand you the spoon, and you began to mix up your food in the pot, humming lightly to yourself as you paused, waiting for the food to cook a bit more, before you reached for a much smaller pot, which had your broth mixture. Making your broth was a bit harder, considering you usually just buy chicken broth at the store, in a can, but you hopefully figured it out.
And strangely enough, Kyla was there to give you a bit of advice before she wandered off to do some other sort of task.
"… Okay. Ready, boy?"
"Ready!" he giggled, though you bet he didn't exactly know what he should be ready for, but you picked up your pot of lukewarm broth, pouring the contents of the pot into the much bigger pot, and the sizzling noise quickly turned into a slow hiss… and then a slight boil. "W-woh!"
"Yep. Woh. Now, we mix," you continued, mixing the contents around, making sure the meat and vegetables were equally dispersed before you reached for some spices, adding them to your bowl. Slowly you scooped a bit of the liquid into your spoon, taking a sip, before you licked your lips. "Ah. Perfect. Want to try? It's a tad cold," you told him, scooping a small spoon full and holding out your hand underneath; the boy opening his mouth and gulping down the soup.
"… Good!"
"Good. Really?" you chuckled, wiping the spoon on a nearby rag that you were using just in case your hands felt a bit too sticky, and you mixed the spoon back into the soup, before you grabbed a lid, placing it upon the pot, and letting out a sigh. "Now, we wait."
"Wait? Why?"
"Cooking takes time, and if you rush you could end up with a disaster. Cooking is a lot like a science experiment. You need to measure out your ingredients, add the contents together in the perfect order, and sometimes you end up with terrible results. But, that's part of the fun. And what I love about cooking is that it's delicious~ fun," you grinned at him, before you took your empty pot, cutting board, and knives, and you began to make your way over to the sink…
Only to be stopped by another cook. "Ah. Miss, I can do that for you."
"N-no need –"
"Let me. You are our guest," the woman insisted, taking your dirty dishes from you, and you paused, watching the dishes leave, before you sighed and made your way back over to the boy.
"… Sad?" Ciel asked in a curious tone, but you simply gave him a smirk.
"Irritated. Not sad," you chuckled at him, your gaze falling back on your soup, before you looked back at Ciel. "Being patient is hard, I know, but think of it this way, we'll have something good for your brother and mother to eat."
"True!" he giggled, sitting up in the stool as he continued, "So… do you like Uncle Undertaker or not?"
"Like, how?" you smirked at his question, causing him to pout.
"Like, like. Like, how mum and daddy like. Are you going to have babies?" he asked, his eyes wide and expecting an answer.
You could have reached in a lot of different ways. Shock, irritation, embarrassment.
But…
You chuckled, before laughing lightly to yourself, causing the boy to give you a pout in response. "I am being serious!"
"I know, I know," you giggled, putting a hand to your face before you sighed. "Let me guess, it's because of your mother talking about Undertaker and I last night, hmmm~?"
"Yes?" he questioned you, but you smirked and shook your head.
"Well… if I tell you the truth… you have to promise~ to keep it a secret, okay? You twins need to keep this a secret~~" you continued, putting a hand to your lips, and he giggled as he copied your motion.
"Yes! I-I promise," he grinned, causing you to pause, before you sighed and scratched the back of your neck.
"Hmm… I think it will be weird to have a romantic relationship with my boss," you began, pausing for a moment before you gave the boy a meek smile. "It won't matter if I like him that way or not. People would judge us, and I don't want to shame his good name."
"But, do you like him?" Ciel asked in a curious tone.
"… Yes," you answered, truthfully, before putting a finger on his lips and giving him a smirk, "I like him, but love him? That's different. A bit more complicated."
"Oh?" he blinked, confused, and you grinned lightly at his confusion.
"You can like many people, dear Phantomhive. Old, young, friends and coworkers. But loving someone is much different then liking them… Would you do anything to see your twin happy?"
"Ah… y-yes?"
"And your mother and father. Do you love them? Want them to be happy, as well?"
"Yes. Of course –"
"Loving another means you put their needs above your own. No matter how much it will inconvenience you… you do it because you love them. There doesn't need to be an explanation. Love just… happens," you smirked, patting the top of the boy's head, "and I'm sure your parents can tell you what love is. Okay?"
"Yes'um," he agreed, and you patted his head before going back to your pot, mixing up the food before going back to looking at him with a grin on your face. Your grin caused the boy to smile in response, giggling at your smirk.
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"Oh… my God, this is extravagant," you couldn't help but respond, eyes wide in utter shock at the beautiful tower of freshly cut fruit and cute looking sandwiches.
You've been to a little tea house before, offered hors d'oeuvres on a plate, like you're some sort of fake noble having a lovely little brunch with a group of friends, but this… "… I'm… shocked. I really am. You didn't have to go all out like this."
"What sort of cook would I be, if I couldn't create a lovely lunch in the garden, perfect for an earl? Us, servants at the Phantomhive estate can do anything our master asks of us."
"Y-yes… obviously you can," you responded, still recovering from your shock, until you felt Ciel tugging on your skirt, lifting up his arms, and with a smile you picked him up, causing the boy to giggle and then look at the tower of food, and letting out an 'aaah!'.
"It's perfect! Mummy is going to love this!"
"Thank you, my little lord," the head cook smiled, causing you to sigh as you scratched the back of your neck. "… I'm sure your soup will be delicious, my lady."
"Perhaps… Look," you scoffed, causing the boy to blink in confusion at your suddenly stern attitude, and the woman gave you a slightly unsure look at the way you switched, from shocked into strict in a moment's notice, "I feel as if we got off on the wrong foot, here. I'm not trying to stomp into your kitchen and take over. Besides… I just want Lady Rachel and her son to get better. I do owe her, at least my gratitude. You don't have to one-up me on this. I just wanted to make a meal that these little asthmatics could enjoy."
"… I-I… I'm sorry if I acted rudely, Lady Graves –"
"Doesn't matter. Even if you despise me or not, I can see talent and skilled preparation. This is better than I could have ever hoped… So, thank you," you finished, giving the woman a slight smile, before you turned your attention to the boy in your arms. "Now, why don't we leave this to the experts and see what your father is up to, hmm~?"
"Yes!" the young Phantomhive cheered, excited to finally leave the kitchen, and you cast one more last look at the head cook before making your way up the stairs, then down a flight of stairs into the garden. You let the boy go the moment your shoes stepped onto the cobblestone walkway, and he giggled and ran off, probably in the direction his father will be found in.
But, you walked a bit slower, taking in the scenery around you.
It looks… ten times better then you could have ever dreamed. Like you were stepping into a fairy tale. Sure, you've seen more enchanting places, but a location in the human world, not created by supernatural hands… Yes… this was perfect.
Absolute perfection.
You couldn't stop yourself as you came across tulips, reds and whites, but your gaze fell upon a lilac colored tulip, and you stopped, admiring the bundle of purple flowers with a content smile playing upon your lips. How could… this place become destroyed? It's so… calm and peaceful here. Lively, quaint… perfect.
If you could just stay human, you'd spend your days here, admiring the flowers, enjoying the company of the Phantomhives… even if, one day, their perfect little world will come crashing down. Destroyed. But…
Why do you think you cannot find this sort of… peace?
"… Lady Clara?" you heard a voice, so soft and sweet you couldn't stop yourself from smiling lightly as you turned, acknowledging the figure who was approaching before you continued to admire the garden.
"Hello, Rachel. How have you been feeling?"
"Better," she told you, putting a smile on her face, "but dear Vincent told me that you set up a little lunch for us?"
"With the help of your cooking staff, yes," you smiled at her, though your smile seemed to wean as you continued. "It took a few hours to prepare, but I think the boys are ready for you to show up."
"… Is something wrong?" she asked in a curious tone, but you slowly shook your head, giving her a light smile in return.
"I'm… fine. Just thinking," you explained, causing the woman to give you a light smile before approaching, standing beside you by the flowerbeds as she let a giggle leave her breath, and you couldn't help but give her a curious glance. "Is something the matter?"
"Nothing. You just remind me of my husband. That contemplative look of concern, of his," she grinned, causing you to smile lightly at her words, but she continued, "but, I must say… I feel as if I'm at fault."
"What do you mean? –"
"My questions. About Undertaker and yourself. I must be the cause of your bad mood," she responded, but you chuckled meekly to yourself.
"Actually, not exactly… Though I will admit, your particular questions from yesterday have made me think about my future… if I should care about it or not," you replied, cryptically, causing the woman to pout at you.
"W-whatever do you mean? Of course you should care about your future."
"Sorry. Maybe I should rephrase it… If… staying with the Undertaker for all this time was because I wanted to or because it was convenient," you explained, pausing for a moment before you turned to her, giving her a light smile in return. "At this point, maybe I overstayed my welcome? If people are starting to think I stay for entirely different reasons."
"But, if you were to leave where would you go?" she asked, but you shrugged your shoulders.
"Wander, probably. As long as I have a say in the matter, it doesn't really matter," you stated, and the woman sighed, before letting out a cough into her gloved hand, but you smoothly produced a white handkerchief from your dress.
"Ah. Thank you."
"Of course," you responded, letting the woman cough into the clothe and gather herself, before she handed the handkerchief back, folded up, and you smoothly placed it back into the folds of your dress.
"… If I may be honest?" Rachel began, causing you to give her a look, then a nod, and she smiled meekly as she continued with a sigh, "I like watching the two of you. Lord Undertaker has always been… aloof, but around you he'll participate in our conversations. No matter how mundane they are. I used to think he didn't like me very much, but I believe, these days, he has a hard time talking to other people. It would be a shame to lose that side of him," she stated, causing you to sigh to yourself, rub your arm, as you stared off at the brightly colored flowers. "… But, just because I hope you two can continue to stay together doesn't mean it should happen. If you believe you need to leave, I understand. Maybe you weren't as happy with him as you originally thought?"
"Well… I mean, I enjoy Undertaker. I don't have to try too hard into making him laugh, we enjoy similar things, and I usually don't have to try… to like him. It's not forced. I don't have to try too hard with him… It's nice," you smiled meekly to yourself, "because I've had relationships where I do have to make an effort, and I never feel like I'm gaining anything in return…
"Which makes me worry, maybe I'm not giving back, enough," you decided to say, causing the woman to let out a light huff.
"You shouldn't think that way. From what I see, you both enjoy each other, equally, for your own reasons. And from what Vincent has told me, you two argue, but that doesn't mean you resent him afterward or you begin to despise his mere existence. You let go of whatever negative emotions you have towards one another and learn to cohabitate… Do you feel unfulfilled, perhaps? Could that be the problem?"
"It's just… considering the life I had to live before this… it's just weird to be this relaxed," you decided to honestly say, before you gave her a meek smile. "I'm used to being worried, all the time. Worried something bad will happen, and it usually does. That my little happy bubble will pop, eventually. Nothing lasts forever, but I guess I'm holding back anxiety… Fighting for survival has changed who I used to be into someone I just… cannot dare to look at, right now," you finished, with a frown on your face, but she meekly smiled in return.
"You don't have to live that way anymore, Lady Lara. You can live the way you wish –"
"And that's the problem. I have no idea what I want to be doing… I'm sorry. I'm being rather dreary today."
"It's okay," she chuckled lightly, sighing as she smiled to herself, "I'm used to this. Especially today, of all days. I… may have had hidden agendas when I asked for Undertaker and yourself to come over to visit, especially this week… Vincent needs something to take his mind off of his own pain," she decided to tell you, causing you to give her a curious look as she continued meekly. "Besides, I had a feeling Lord Undertaker would show up, anyways. I decided to extend the invitation to yourself."
"… Then… they're being all gloomy because of the death of Vincent's mother? Countess Claudia, right?"
"Yes," she sighed, giving you a meek smile before she turned and gave you a slightly confused look. "I didn't know you knew about her."
"A bit," you chuckled nervously, deciding that you didn't want to go into too many details. "You can blame Undertaker for most of my knowledge, though."
"I… never got to meet her," Rachel continued, her eyes thoughtfully looking at a particular set of flowers off in the distance, making you wonder why, but you kept your silence as she continued somberly. "Though, I doubt she would have approved of our marriage… I'm no fool. I know what Vincent does for the Queen, but… pretending to be ignorant… makes him so happy," she decided to say, causing you to glance at her. A skeptical look overlooking your features as you looked the woman over.
But… something in your mind told you to console her, if just a little bit. It's not like you can be entirely honest with her, but…
"… Do you want to know what I think?" you decided to say, taking a step closer to the flowerbed as you stared off into the distance, noticing the green rolling hills and bright sunlight. "… I'm sure that Claudia would have been ecstatic to have a daughter in law like yourself."
"W-what makes you say that? –"
"I may not have been here for too long, but you make Vincent happy. And, you gave him two beautiful baby boys. Also, you're willing to put up with his crazy antics, no matter how annoying he could become. And if you know about his life as a Watchdog… that only shows how strong of a woman you actually are, Lady Rachel," you stated, slowly turning to give her a light smile, noticing the unsure, tearful look in her gaze, causing you to grin and lightly pat her shoulder before taking a step to the side. "The underworld knows more about the Phantomhive name then high society, if I'm going to be honest. Perhaps I don't understand everything that transpired between you and Vincent, and why he picked you specifically, but I can tell that he actually cares. And you want to know what I think?
"He probably wanted a lady such as yourself because you're far too kind of a woman for him. And, he can have a family and actually find some happiness in his life. Being a Watchdog… I'm sure it's difficult," you told her, before letting out a light chuckle and pointing behind you, "So, enough about that. Why don't we head over for lunch?"
"Of course," she giggled, accepting your offer with a bit more enthusiasm then you were expecting.
But the shocked look on her face was worth the hassle.
"Mummy!" you heard the older twin cheering, running up to his mother and grabbing her legs. "Look, look! I made the soup!"
"Yes we did," you responded with a smirk of your own, walking over to the nicely arranged outdoor set, your eyes gazing over the work with a critical eye before you made your way over to the much younger twin, patting the top of his head as you gave him a light smile. "How are you feeling?"
"O-oh… 'kay," he mumbled, letting out a rough cough, but you handed him a cup of water before calmly making your way over to Undertaker, who was solemnly watching the scene unfold in front of him.
The excitement on the sick little Phantomhives and how proud the young earl was to show off to his little wifie. But, what fully encapsulated his attention was a particular woman sitting down in a chair beside his own, sighing to herself before she turned and gave him a slight smirk.
"So… do you think this was too over the top or what?"
"Hmm~… No. Just perfect," he grinned, causing you to lightly smile as you looked at the Phantomhives growing more and more excited, while you simply sighed lightly in response. "… Something the matter?"
"No… No, I just… realized what date it is, today," you decided to say, causing the man to give you a curious look.
"Oooh~? And what date is that?" he asked, but you remained quiet. A contemplative look overcoming your features as you put two and two together.
It's… your birthday today… isn't it. Would that mean you're officially twenty, now?
Hmm… you're not sure how you feel about that. Becoming a year older. Officially. Considering you jumped back in time, you're still not quite sure, but… if it's the date of Claudia's death… then that must mean…
It's June 13th… right?