I find myself back in the silver room, holding my legs to my chest. My behind throbs as sit down onto the mattress, swallowing me whole. Why did Christian do that? It's certainly going to bruise by tomorrow. It's the shade of blood red, spreading downwards towards the backs of my thighs. My head hits the softness of the cotton clad pillow, allowing me to sink into it, letting my tears seep absorbing it just like a sponge. Silently, my body hunches, allowing shaking as I let out small sobs. My eyes seem weak as I cry, closing every few seconds, not even wanting to open again, ever. It was so embarrassing, who even does that? It was cruel not to mention hurtful. I let out a strangled sigh, as my eyes close for good, hoping that tomorrow will never come.
Sheets tangle themselves around my limbs, covering me a layer of sweat. I panic and push against them as I relive the hours just previous. He comes closer, pulling my skirt upwards.
"stoppp" I cry.
One blow to the left cheek.
Another to the right.
"Please… no more."
Another!
I scream out loud, holding upwards in bed, my heart racing so fast. It beats like a drum against my ribcage, threatening to break free. The sweat is slik against my hairline, greasing if back. I shudder at the thoughts of my nightmare. Suddenly the door comes rushing open. A shirtless Christian with hair sprawled in all directions, enters my room in a swift motion. His grey orbs are panicked as he scans the room for me. I hold the headboard, scared. Christian strides closer with a sincere smile on his face.
"Are you alright, Anna?" he asks as he said on the edge of my bed. I now my head, not really knowing what to say or do.
"I heard you screaming, Anastasia, mind telling me what's got you so worked up?" His time is unusually calm and collective. it startles me a little.
"I.. uh...had a nightmare.." I mumble whilst chewing licks of my hair.
"What was it about?" he presses.
"uh… you.. earlier." I trail off at the end, not wanting to relive it for a second time.
"Anna what I did earlier, is not something I am proud of. It was very spontaneous and I shouldn't have done that to you. It was wrong of me. You just seem to push me to my limits by just opening your mouth and I don't even understand why. It puts me out if my comfort zone."
"B-but.. Mr Grey.. Why.. why did you do it?" I continue to chew.
"Miss Steele, control is something I like to exercise. I suppose that's why Elena sent you here to stay. But that was a side if me that loves to control everything around me. Your subdue nature is adorable, but your stubborn attitude is something that needs to change. I think that's what Elena wants too."
"I-i don't think you should of hit me. It hurts." tears pool in my eyes again.
As they fall, Christian's thumb wipes them away. His hand comes down my cheekbone, along my neck and then brushes into my hair. He comes closer to my face, looking straight into my eyes. It's like staring into the universe; hundreds and thousands of undiscovered elements waiting to be explored. Let me explore you Christian, please… The way he nestles his fingers into my hair draws me closer to him. My eyes roll back. Please Christian.
"Anna I won't do that again, without your permission."
"My permission?"
"yes Anastasia, your permission."
"What did you mean by 'welcome to my world'?" I murmur.
"What did I mean? You'll find out soon my dear Anna. You have a lot to learn. I'm quite surprised that Elena hasn't been teaching you." teaching me … what?
"come on, let's get you to sleep." He says as I yawn.
Christian pulls away and unfolds the duvet. He slips himself under, making sure there is a space between us. Subconsciously, I move closer to him. Despite my initial need for comfort, Christian moves further away.
"No Anastasia." He sighs, clearly not wanting to have this discussion.
"I don't get you Mr Grey. You're horrible to me, and then you're nice to me and then horrible again. I can't keep up with you. You're like a yo-yo. You go up and down and you're so temperamental. Christian.. I just can't." My hands smack over my mouth, as I just register what I've just said. Ugh.. why am i so stupid? Stupid, stupid girl!
Defeated, he lets out another sign. "Miss Steele, I think you should sleep now. It's nearly four am. We have to be up early, though I might let you sleep in. I want to start your training early."
Once again, my face hits the pillow. The cotton hugs my face as I turn over to face away from Mr Controlling. The duvet is pulled right over me, engulfing me so I don't have any room to glance at him. I don't even want him here. I was fine without him. Mother wouldn't disturb me. Christian is tenacious in his ways, I've learnt that in the space of a day.
My backside still throbs as I find a comfortable decision. It's hard not to look at him and admire his beauty. I close my eyes, pretending that I'm not even here, pretending to be somewhere far away from all the pain and emotional struggles. After a few minutes of steady breathing, Mr Grey thinks that I've fallen into a deep slumber. He slowly slides out of the bed and the room and clicks the door behind him.
Sleep doesn't really come. I stay in bed just staring into the blackness of of the night. What does he have planned for me tomorrow? What am I going to learn. If it's anything like today I'm going to be riddled with pain. Oh for the love of god, please help me.
Christian wakes me at eight in the morning. I savour the last few minutes, not wanting to be late after my experience yesterday. Breakfast is laid on the kitchen counter in a sprawl of fruits and cakes. I don't really eat much under the domineering eye of Mr Grey, it's rather hard to concentrate. There's a nervousness in the pot of my stomach, churning and twisting it, making me feel extremely sick. He doesn't talk to me, only stares at me, watching my lips every time they curve. I pull my bottom lol between my teeth as I try to think of what I will be learning. I see him stiffen.
"Anastasia, you're biting that lip again."
I stop. "I'm sorry." I mumble.
Abruptly, he walked out the room but stops in the middle of the room. With his index finger, Christian he singles me to follow him, so I do as I'm told. I follow in his pursuit up stairs to the room at the end of the long hallway. The door unlike the rest is black. It stands out. Oh, and it does intrigue me. With a key he pulls out of his jean pocket, he unlocks the door and walks in, switching on the lights.
The first thing I see is a large bed in the centre of the room. Red satin's adorn it, all neatly pressed against the black bed frame. It goes well with the red walls that are home to lots and lots of toys… should I call them toys? From floor to ceiling, the walls are covered in whips, chains and ropes. Oh my.. My thighs push together. I run my hands along these foreign objects, inspecting them one by one. The whips are so smooth as I grasp them in my palms. They give me a sense of weakness and make me quiver under their touch. I move onto the chains and restraints. These leather cuffs pull my attention. Inquisitively, I pull them from the hook that they are situated and run the fine leather between my fingers. Somehow I totally forget Christians in the room, the red room. Shelves upon shelves hold several pieces of equipment. It all new. Never have I seen so many instruments in my life. My cheeks flush a crimson red, it rising from my neck bringing colour to my face. It isn't until I reach the other side, when questions start arising in my head.
Why am i in here?
Does he want to do this to me?
Christian, who's still perched in the doorway gives me a wary half-hearted smile. He seems deflated. I begin to open my mouth, but the quick witted man beats me to it, "what do you think of my playroom, Miss Steele?"
A smile also tugs on my lips, how can he be so cool about a situation like this?
"I think it's quite satisfactory, Mr Grey!" I humour him.
"Is it really? I though our lesson could begin in here."
"Mr Grey… what.. what happens in here?" I stutter, overwhelmed by everything in front of me.
"Anything I want to happen. I bring you pleasure."
I run a whip through my hand. "This," I motion towards it, "doesn't look like something of pleasure."
" it will give what I want it to give. Pain or pleasure."
"That's not something I'd like,Mr Grey." I stare, turning on my heels.
He's hot on my pursuit, following me into the corridor. "Anna… wait" he pleas.
I stop dead in my tracks when he calls me by my nickname.
"What, Mr Grey?"
"Let me show you, how good it can be."
"Christian…"
"Anastasia, you can stop whenever you want to, please let me show you how pleasurable this experience can be."
"What about Elena, and bring sent here to learn respect?"
"You are respecting me, you're being obedient. You're giving yourself to me. That's my definition of respect."
"Okay…" I murmur, Intrigued by his perception.
"Oh, Anna." He grabs my waist guiding me back to the red room.
Christian locks the door behind us. I turn to look at him. His eyes widen withlist and excitement, clearly trying to contain his eagerness. I take a seat on the bed, waiting for him.
"Christian… Mr Grey..?"
"Yes, Anastasia."
"What are you?"
"I, Miss Steele, am a dominant and you my lovely girl is the submissive."