Learning To Trust

Chapter 2.

Distant Shore

Starscream's pov:

Cold.

I was taken by this cold. It was a painful cold that sent shivers down my spinal plating. All that was around me was complete utter blackness. That was how it was for a while, and in that time, I searched. I wandered aimlessly until I saw a small dot of white light: like a light at the end of the tunnel. Happy to see the light, and wanting to get out of this endless cold, I practically ran towards the light. I was just a little afraid. As I got closer to the light, it nearly engulfed me. It was almost as if I was being called to the Allspark. Accepting my fate, I was just about to enter the light, when some kind of force stopped me. It was at that point that I also heard an angelic voice that seemed to be singing to me.

It all became so lovely.

Those blue skies above me.

Those funny feelings I had never felt before I met you.

As I listened to the song, the cold around me became wormer somehow.

I thought I'd stay awhile.

I'd try to learn to smile.

So many colors I had never even known.

maybe I find myself sitting on that distant shore.

Maybe I'm not alone.

The light disappeared, and I suddenly felt myself slumped on the dirt of Earth. I was no longer in any pain. I felt perfect actually. However, I realized I was in some sort of liquid. Then the events of last night came rushing back. I might have panicked, but then I noticed that same voice I had heard before was still singing to me, and it was moving right under me. I should have attacked, and told the fleshling to get away from me, but there was something about that voice that just kept me entranced there, listening to the song.

Then I see the colors fading.

gentleness of light escaping.

Shadows of my fear invading.

Have I seen this all before?

I know

That there's something residing.

That tarrer deep inside me.

I couldn't understand how you could be so bold.

Maybe I find myself smiling on that distant shore.

Maybe I'm not alone.

I recognized this song. A few years again, I went to see Knockout in the med bay, and I saw him watching this Earth thing called Steven Universe. He insisted I watch it with him, and I will admit I hated season one: that is until Lapis showed up. Then it got interesting. After that, the only thing I was loyal to other then myself was that show, and another one called Star Vs The Forces of Evil. Anyway, I remembered that song. It was in the latest episode: along with a few other things I knew were right, but Knockout still refuses to except.

I enjoyed the song so much, and was still sort of half in recharge, so I suppose I wasn't in too great a frame of mind when I said, "Ah yes. Distant Shore from Steven Universe."

It wasn't till after I spoke, the singing little fleshling froze, and so did I. I on-lined my optics met her wide amazed green optics looking right up at me.

Rowan's pov

I had set my alarm to wake me up at 6. That was 3 and a half hours earlier then I usually woke, but if I was going to have any hope of cleaning up any of that energon before Nan got home, I knew I had to act fast. I changed out of my black cat pajamas, and into a plain purple dress. I didn't want to dress up too much because I knew I would be getting down in the dert to clean, but I wanted to also look presentable in case Starscream woke up.

By the time I had gotten breakfast, and gotten dressed, It was 7 AM. Going outside, I set to work cleaning, and by nine, I had already worked my way to the backyard: specifically right beside Starscream.

I wanted so badly just to touch him: to let him know I was there, and that I loved him, and only wanted him to be safe from whatever had hurt him. Since I couldn't, I did the only thing I knew to do to comfort people in my own way. I started singing. I sang the one song I felt in the mood for. Ever since I had heard the song, I related to it so much that whenever I was alone, I would sing it to calm my mind. As I sang, I was turned away from Starscream while I was cleaning. Thanks to my voice instructor helping me out with how to sing the song, the words just flowed from me, like water from a river. Therefore, when I was done with the song, I did not expect to hear a very familiar and hauntingly beautiful voice call the song by name.

"Ah yes Distant Shore from Steven Universe", Starscream said.

I turned to meet him so fast, I heard a couple of my bones pop. For a while, we just stared at each other. I was trying not to fangirl, and I know he was wondering why this pathetic little fleshling was in his presence. Even though I was worried about Starscream judging me, I just continued to stare into his intense beautiful red optics. Seeing he was not going to break the silence, I jumped in with a question I genuinely wanted the answer to.

"You watch Steven U?", I asked in a surprisingly calm voice.

He simply smiled at me. For the next several hours, we geeked out about our different theories about the show. At that point, I brought up Star VS The Forces Of Evil, and so went another few hours. By the time we were done geeking out, It was getting close to about three in the afternoon, and I knew Nan would be home around five, so I just kind of sat there in front of Starscream for a while.

"What?", he asked when I didn't say anything.

I figured that since I had just sat there like an idiot for the last minute without saying anything, and Starscream hadn't told me I was pathetic yet, I decided that I could trust him. I told him about all my troubles with my Grandma, and the fact that I was treated so badly. however, in order to make him understand the gravity of the situation, I broke fan meets cartoon character contact rule number one, and told him that transformers was a cartoon, and surprisingly, he knew. He had told me that in order to cover up unusual robot activity, Agent Fowler had come up with the cover story that these robots were characters they were testing out of a ride about a cartoon. Since no one had even seen a cartoon like that before, the Transformers cartoons were created.

"Obviously Prime is the accurate one", I said looking up at Starscream with a smile.

"Whatever they were thinking with those other stupid cartoons about us, I have no idea", Starscream said returning my smile. "Anyway, your caretaker really treats you as Megatron treets me?"

"Yes", I said trying not to cry right then and there. "I do all I can for her, but she's never grateful. She has never physically abused me, but the emotional abuse I have taken in the years has been enough to hurt my heart so much that I have grown cold to the world. In fact, whenever I have tried to befriend anyone of my kind I have always been emotionally destroyed forever. This is why I hate humanity, which is why if I was given the opportunity, I would join the Decepticons in a heartbeat."

I would have told Starscream so much more, but my phone rang, and I knew it was Nan calling to tell me she was on her way home, and to ask if I wanted dinner. "I have to go Starscream", I said. "Nan is almost here. If you need to stay here, I give you absolute permission."

"But what about your caretaker?", he asked. "Will she not see me?"

"I will deal with her", I said. "I just want you to stay here as long as you need to in order to get better."

I wanted to say more, but it was now the second time Nan was calling, so begrudgingly, I answered the phone, and went in my house.

Starscream's pov

As I watched the fleshling known as Rowan go back to her dwelling, I kept thinking about what she had just told me. She only had the one caretaker to look after her, and this person apparently treated her the way Megatron treated me. I didn't know why, but for some reason, I felt very concerned for this little fleshling. In just a short few hours, as it is referred to by Earth time, we had gotten along quite well. It wasn't just the fact that we both liked the same Earth media types that made me feel so close to her. She was intelligent: far more than any of the other autobots' pets. To top it all off, the fact that she knew about that little cartoon thing that the fleshlings had made about us, and the fact that she automatically chose the side of the Decepticons brought her close to my spark. She seemed to have a hatred for her own kind because of experiences she had mentioned to me throughout the day involving confrontations between her and other members of her race that in the end, left her emotionally jaded, and wanting to pretty much kill everyone. It was for this reason that I wanted to stay with her. I wanted to hear more about her. I don't know why, but I just didn't want to leave. I could leave of course. My cystems monitor said I was perfectly healed and ready to fly, but I didn't want to. Megatron didn't seem to be too ergent in wanting me back to the ship. In fact, in all the time I had been missing, I did not once receive a com from Megatron or anyone to ask of my statis. At this point though, I did not care. I had another mission to attend to at the moment. I was pulled out of my thoughts as a white Earth vehicle pulled up and parked in the driveway of Rowan's dwelling and an elderly human got out. The woman appeared to be quite weak and fragile. She was quite a bit smaller and thinner then Rowan, who was not so tall herself.

"There's no way this woman can wreak as much oppression as Megatron", I thought.

I was proven wrong about an hour later. Things had been pretty quiet for awhile until the woman known as Nan came to the back yard. I was still and it was dark, so I figured she wouldn't see me, but then I saw her look down.

"SCRAP!", I thought.

In our day of chatting and fun, I had distracted Rowan from the task at hand, which was cleaning the energon I had leaked all over her yard. Most of it was gone except for the large pool that was right beneath me.

"ROWAN!", the woman yelled in a surprisingly deep voice. "GET OUT HERE NOW!"

Rowan came running out faster then I had ever seen anyone run before. She was shivering all over. The more I looked at her, the more she reminded me of myself when I knew I was going to get a scolding for Megatron.

"Rowan?", The older human asked sternly. "What is this blue stuff on my dirt?"

"I don't know Nan", Rowan said with fear in her voice.

"You know I don't believe that", the old woman barked. "Now I will only ask you once again: where did this blue stuff come from? What were you playing with out here? Did you even think to remember that this is where my flowers were going to be planted? Now I have to clean all this shit up and revitalize the soil. You just ruined a week's worth of work. What were you thinking?

"I...", Rowan tried to say. She was shaking violently and she was now also silently sobbing. While the older woman yelled at her with the ferocity of Megatron, she had backed Rowan up. Now her back was against her dwelling, she was uncontrollable shaking and sobbing, and the elder human had both hands on Rowan's shoulders, and the yelling did not end.

"And another thing", the elder human continued. "Did you even think to remember to water my flowers? You know that if they do not get watered, they will dye. But you didn't remember did you? Instead, Your mindless agenda resulted in my beautiful lantanas dyeing, and your cat not getting fed or getting water. Do you have any notion of the consequences of your blunder?"

"Yes ma'am", Rowan said almost unintelligible through her sobs.

"Good", the elder human said. "Now, I want you out here first thing in the morning. By the time I get out here at eight in the morning, this blue whatever it is better be gone. DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME ROWAN!? DO YOU?"

Rowan just nodded. As the woman turned around, the full moon crested over the dwellings enough to where the sylver metal of my head became reflective in it's light. The woman was taken aback by what she saw. Wouldn't any human be just a bit curious to see a large cybertronian in their yard?

"What is that?", the elder asked, her voice quivering. She took a moment to compose herself before saying something that sent a shiver down my spine, "Well, that's nothing to worry about. Our dear old friend Silas from church is very interested in things like this. I'll call him in the morning and he'll come pick it up."

After the elder had said that, she practically dragged Rowan inside their dwelling. The fact that this elder human had yelled at Rowan, coupled with the fact that this woman knew Silas so familiarly, sent shivers down my spine. Indeed, Rowan was not exaggerating about her and her care-taker's relationship. In fact, I think she was even down-playing it when she told me about it.

I can admit: I was quite afraid of my situation. When the elder had spoken about Silas, she sounded almost like she was speaking to me, as if she knew I could hear her. She must know quite a bit about cybertronian secrets thanks to her "dear friend." I will also admit that I was actually worried for Rowan too. I knew how someone like Megatron was: especially since I lived with the exact comparative cybertronian. I was Megatron's second, just as Rowan was to this elder human apparently. Both Rowan and I got the blame whenever something went wrong in the eyes of our respective higher officers. She was constantly ridiculed as I was. This made me have a great deal of sympathy for her. If any Autobot had heard of this sympathy, they would just attributed it to the fact that I wanted something from her. That was not the case. In the little time I had known her, I could tell she trusted me. She was very smart for a human. I knew what I wanted to do. However, before I could think any further on it, I heard a voice calling my name.

"Starscream", Rowan whispered from an open window.

As silently as I could, I crawled up to the window and peared in at her.

"Yes?", I asked.

"You need to leave", she said with a sob in her panicked voice. Looking at her closely, she was still crying as she looked into my optics with utmost trust and sincerity. It was with this that she said, "I know Silas from the show, and in person. He will gut you if you stay any longer. You and I both know that. Your only option is to leave."

as she said this, she started to cry even more. My spark almost broke with how sad she seemed. I knew I was taking a major risk with what I said next, but I just had to try this.

"I will leave on one condition", I said.

"What's that?", She asked, the sadness clear in her voice.

"You come with me."

Author's note: The song used in this chapter is distant shore from Steven Universe. I DO NOT OWN THIS SONG! I do love it though. PRIMUS those last two episodes were SO GOOD! I bet anyone who knows the show knows exactly what theory Starscream followed right? Thank you to all those who followed, faced and reviewed. I'm sorry this is late, but it's here now. Anyway...

BYEEEEEEEEEEEE!