Hank looked at his partner's chest. He didn't know anything about androids. Sure he knew first aid but the was for a human. Connor knew everything about human first aid but Hank had been to lazy to think about learning stuff for Connor. "Androids don't get sick" Connor's words rang in his head. Softly he ran his hands over Connor, trying to assess broken parts. God did androids have anything that resembled ribs? They can breathe right? He was completely lost. He didn't have a clue and Connor was going to die because he was a selfish, lazy idiot. Instead he pulled his jacket around Connor and hoisted him onto his lap.

"Hey Con, you know I love you ok." He stared down as Connor blinked rapidly to try and focus.

"Hhank.. I-ii really t-hought I-I wanted to di-" Hank sobbed into his dark hair, how could he not have noticed that Connor felt this way.

"Pplease d-ddont leave m-e Hank." It felt like his heart was being torn out and stomped on every time Connor let out a whimper.

Gavin nearly fell down the stairs with the Captain. He had the urge to tell the medic in tow to hurry up. When he finally turned the corner he nearly collapsed. All he could see was Hank's back with Connor undoubtedly held in his arms. The medic barged past the two cops as they stood frozen. They knew if Connor died it would certainly kill the older man. Slowly Gavin wobbled forward and peered at Connor's face. The Thirium was still leaking from multiple cuts on his face courtesy of Gavin and his eyes were closed. The LED on the side of his face blinked slower still a vivid red. Hank was bloodier than Connor something Gavin tried to not take notice in. Connor's eyes opened quickly before he set into a coughing fit. Coughing while not being able to breathe was sure to be painful and the pain in Connor's eyes made painful a loose word.

"Oh no please, God no. No no no please. Connor." Hank cradled Connor as Thirium leaked from his mouth, the confirmation of some kind of internal injury.

"Hhhank p-please…" Connor choked barely audible. "Ddont g-give upp. I-i loove y-y-" His words cut of by another waves of Thirium coating his lips.

The medic's eyes widened as she swiftly took her radio and called for a stretcher. She asked Hank to help her as she took Connor from his lap and lay him on the floor with Hank's folded jacket acting as a pillow. Connor's body shook violently while he let out a scream of agony which was followed by the gurgling noises one assumed were him choking on his own blood. Hank held Connor's head steady with one hand taking his pulse and when the shaking stopped he cried as Connor's LED slowed blinking and turned a lifeless grey.

"NO. NO. CONNOR. No please Connor please." Hank's screams were heard throughout the department as he desperately searched for life in his friend.

"Breathing?"

"No."

"LED?"

"No."

"Pulse?"

"...No."

Hank got up and took Connor from the ground, the stretcher would take far too long. Connor was much lighter than he imagined which wasn't a good sign. He slipped his arm underneath Connor's neck and knees. He hoisted him up and with numb legs climbed the stairs. Officers stopped to watch as Hank walked through the maze of cubicles toward the door. Some watched the face of the lieutenant which was worried and frightened. Others watched those who followed. Most eyes wandered to Connor. His eyes still half open, agony etched on his face, Thirium coating the floors beneath him.

Hank practically threw Connor into the ambulance as he jumped in beside him. He watched as the paramedics worked on Connor. One went to dress his head while the other set up a Thirium infusion.

"Minor damage to his Thirium regulator but the head wound is bad and he has some internal damage and bleeding. Body is overheating. Start resuscitation attempts" Hank watched the two young women as the spoke in jargon he couldn't understand, moving in synchronised flurries as the attempt to bring Connor back to life.

God he wished he hadn't came in the ambulance. Watching their attempts to save his son were heartbreaking. Every minute or two, Connor's body would jolt, his head falling to the side, eyes that once held life staring straight through him.

Please Lord tell me this is a dream. Lord if this isn't a dream, don't take away another of my sons. Hank wasn't a praying man but dire situations called for desperate measures.

"I have a pulse! It's thready and week but we have him back" Hank raised his eyes to the roof of the ambulance. Hank watched as the blonde paramedic forced Connor's head back to force some kind of tube down his throat as he fought to resist it

Thank you.

Hank spent hours staring at the warm walls of the relatives room. No one had objected to him being the human relative of an android. Slowly he drifted into a slumber.

He was walking on numb legs through some kind of forest. There was a lake filled with the kind of little fish that Connor likes, the kind he promised he would buy for Connor. He had promised that a month ago. Why had Connor not reminded him? Connor always remembered that kind of thing.

"I don't want to be a burden lieutenant"

"You could never be a burden to me, Con"

Hank had been taken aback by the younger's preposition. How could Connor think he was a burden, especially to him. He should have told Connor that he loved him, did he know? He needs to know.

"Connor, it's ok, I'm not going to hurt you. I'm just going to stop you from hurting your head. You're safe now"

Connor had deliberately smashed his head off the walls, he had taken Hank's gun. He didn't want live anymore. He hadn't blocked any of Reed's attacks. Why? How had he been so blind. Connor wanted to die and Hank hadn't even noticed. He knew he wouldn't come back this time, it would be permanent.

Hank found himself running. Why? He didn't know, he didn't have control over his legs anymore. He ran straight to a wall. A seemingly blank wall that spun and held the lifeless body of his best friend. He dropped to his knees, sinking softly into the soft April grass.

"Hank I was dying and you couldn't see it, you couldn't save me. YOU killed me Hank, you let me die"

Connor's head fell forward, Thirium coating the grass. The gaping hole at the back of his head started to grow until it consumed the boy Hank called a son.

Again he found himself running. This time to a set of doors. He didn't slow, pushing them open. It smelled strongly of antiseptic inside. A hospital. No. Not hospitals. He found a room, a single room, the only room on the right at the end of the corridor.

Quietly, Hank entered watching the white-washed walls. He watched as the seat by the bed was taken by a hunched shadow. He approached aprehensively. The seat was taken by himself, a very sleep deprived version of himself. One he hadn't seen since the young days with Connor. He could only watch as the scene played out.

"I-i ii'm sorrry hHank"

"It's ok, son. You rest now"

The machines nearby screamed as Connor's LED, a rapid crimson, slowed and faded to grey. His eyes were closed in a somewhat peaceful manner. Hank placed the paler hand onto Connor's chest. He ran a hand through Connor's hair, fixing it so he looked more like his Connor. Hank bent before placing a kiss on the lifeless figure's forehead. YOU FUCKING IDIOT.. WHY DID YOU NOT DO THAT WHEN HE WAS ALIVE? The real Hank grabbed Connor and shook him.

"Come on, Con. Wake up. Tell me some bullshit about how your predecessor was destroyed. Just say something"

Hank screamed into the oblivion as he watched fake Hank bury his second son willingly, without a fight. No begging just acceptance.

Hank bolted awake. His heart raced. He noticed the nurse standing by the door. He needed to get a grip before he got himself sectioned by being a loony. Anxiously he willed the nurse to walk faster to no avail. They walked through children's reception where colourful fish swam in a glass paradise. Then they trekked through corridor after corridor until they came to the one from his dream. No. He wasn't going to watch Connor die. He went to enter the room but stopped.

"If something happens, what do I do?" Recalling the terrors from his nightmare he questioned the young nurse.

"There's a panic button to the right of Connor. Stop panicking Lieutenant, he's a strong boy." She gently squeezed his arm.

"I guess I better explain as simply as I can. Connor suffered many injuries which usually wouldn't provoke what happened today. Yes, he was assaulted pretty bad but his healing capabilities could usually take care of that. Connor's body suffered from extensive stress and subsequently he had a strong panic attack. He also banged his head up pretty bad. The other thing was his biocomponents that work as lungs were damaged. Androids don't necessarily need to breathe but it regulates their body temperature. Connor went into shock as a result."

Hank just stared at her in awe. So to put it in simple words: Connor was unstable, physically and mentally. God give him strength, he was going to need it. Slowly he opened the door. His heart nearly hit the floor, bile climbed in his throat. Connor looked paler than the sheets. The array of machines made him look even smaller. Hank approached the bed, taking a pale hand into his. It was shockingly cold.

"Con, c'mon kid. It's time to wake up." He gently stroked Connor's hand, lifting it to his face. In a comforting gesture, Hank brushed the stray hairs from Connor's forehead. Suddenly, a small whisper registered in Hank's ears.

"Hank, are you there?"

"Of course I am, son. Open your eyes." He did as he was told. Blinking rapidly he focused on his partner's face. He felt horrible, he was the reason for the sadness in Hank's eyes and that pain hurt more than physical pain. He slowly pulled his head to face the other way, tears running down his face.

"You need to leave"

"Conn-" Hank started but he was cut off. "LEAVE. NOW! YOU NEED TO GO." The command came out in a sob as Hank pulled his arms around the weeping detective. Running his hand through the younger's hair, he whispered words of comfort to him.

"It's ok, I got you, I got you. You're safe now. Just tell me what's wrong."

"I don't know, D- Hank. Everything just felt so hopeless. I didn't mean to upset you." He silently prayed that the slip of his tongue would go unnoticed and it did.

"We'll get through it together, me and you. We always do, don't we? Now rest kid, we'll talk later." Connor lay his head against Hank and slowly accepted the abyss as he listened to the rhythmic thump.

"We'll get through it. Together."