Author's Note: This will be the last entry in the Marshmallow series. It's tempting, but I can't keep indulging this little kit fox indefinitely!
This chapter takes place concurrently with Chapter 13 of Vixen's Mark.
To her credit, Terra didn't start crying immediately when she was told. She was a bit too bewildered for that. Sadness; even regret started to consume her the instant the bunny departed from the kit fox. Terra stood there at her position at the register at Bunnyburrow's Best Reads, frozen. Terra's could feel her next breath tremble pathetically, but she rubbed her throat and shook her head, denying the feeling.
The previous night, a small wonder had happened; a bunny had asked Terra to go with her to the kit fox's first Serendipiday.
Terra grit her teeth for just an instant, but then fought for control over her mouth. It was just Serendipiday. Just a festival about fireworks and gambling and taking chances. The vixen couldn't help but think that she was having a chance taken on her, and it had warmed her.
The kit fox knew a lot about bunny culture. She knew that being invited to go to Serendipiday's nighttime festival alone with someone else was supposed to be a special, almost intimate thing. A date, even.
And what a bunny it was that had asked her. Terra pulled herself out of her emotional quagmire to force a smile and wave at that particular bunny as she left the bookstore. Her name was Samantha Hopps, and she was gorgeous. For a bunny, she had a statuesque build. Tall, even a tiny bit taller than Terra, not including her long, lapine ears. Her soft cream and white fur's delicate colors contrasted her piercing amber eyes. Her snug outfit left her arms exposed, showing off her attractive, lissome muscles and teasing at the strength concealed by her clothes.
That bunny, Samantha. She had asked if Terra would like to go to Serendipiday with her. Terra tried not to sound too excited when she replied, but it came out girlish and eager. She knew she was at least five years younger than the bunny, but she knew she didn't need any help looking or sounding like a child.
Samantha was lukewarm toward her for the former part of the night. She seemed more like a chaperone or guardian than a friend. Something started changing halfway through the evening, and soon they were laughing and joking like they had known each other for a long time. Terra was doing her best not to let her tail just wag through the whole affair; she knew she couldn't keep it from at least swishing most of the time. The two ate sugary, brightly-colored treats, tried the mystery drink flavors at the special random drink fountain, and spent two sets of Serendipiday coins. Caught up in the moment, Terra didn't think to keep one for herself and her memories until after she had spent her last one.
Either way, she had won a giant orange Serendipity plush with blue eyes from a kooky giraffe, so she had her own memoir of that perfect night.
Of course, the perfection wasn't to last. Samantha started acting strange on the drive back and eventually demanded that Terra pull over in the middle of nowhere. Icy terror gripped Terra as Samantha threw the door open and spit curses under her breath. Uncomfortable and scared, Terra tried to summon every ounce of her courage to offer her whatever she could do to help, but Samantha snapped.
The rabbit cursed Terra out, turning words and secrets that the kit fox had entrusted to Samantha mere hours ago into weapons to hurt the little vulpine. Confused and hurt, Terra crumpled and sobbed. In the present, she sniffled at reliving the fresh memory.
There had been good reason for the panic attack the bunny suffered. Samantha admitted to Terra that a fox had done terrible things to her in the past. The mere admission of this made the junk food in Terra's stomach threaten to come up. Eventually, Samantha's anger fizzled and the two managed to calm down enough to go watch the Hopps family fireworks together.
She hadn't said it then; maybe she should have, but Terra really admired Samantha for that moment. She had asked another fox to do a significant thing together with her, and to Terra, that was important and it mattered. It made her feel special; worthy.
Only because of that feeling could Terra gather together all of her nerve and gently touch her nose to Samantha's on the hill that nice evening. The bunny's nose twitched after the act and a look of surprise; maybe wonder passed onto Samantha's face. It was all Terra could do not to laugh, so she held a tentative, wobbly smile on her muzzle.
But like a pleasant dream, Terra had just been rudely shaken from it. Samantha had just come in near the beginning of Terra's shift and told her not to "read too much" into it. Terra immediately felt crushed.
Of course, she thought. Of course. It made so much sense. Even if the bunny found foxes attractive, there was no way she wanted to get involved with such a nobody like Terra.
The worst part was the self-loathing and self-pity that rapidly pressed in on Terra. The vixen had to deal with those stewing thoughts for her whole shift while she fought off lumps in her throat and encroaching tears. Her first break came an excruciating three hours into her shift, and she retreated into the back seat of her car and finally just laid down and cried. She desperately needed the release, but she hoped none of her co-workers would find her out there sobbing like a kit.
She needed to talk to someone, but who? Terra picked up her phone and looked through it while she sobbed. Her teeth wrenched into a grimace as she made her way past Samantha's number and down to her sister Violet. Maybe Samantha's unusual, pragmatic sister could tell her what had gone wrong.
The phone only rang once, and Violet picked up.
"Violet Hopps," her voice came out properly, but she immediately heard Terra's crying from the other end of the line. "Terra? What's wrong?"
"She said- she said it didn't mean anything...!" Terra's voice was almost too high-pitched to hear and it pinched off into a choked sob.
"What? Who? Samantha?" Violet returned.
"Yeah, nhh- Seren... Serendipih... nngh..." Terra mumbled. That festival just had too many syllables for her to properly articulate. She collapsed into several more sobs. "What'd I do...?"
"All right, I will talk to Samantha and see what's going on," Violet said firmly, but with a hint of care.
"Wha- no!" Terra popped up into a seated position in the seat, wiping her eyes. "I don't wanna- ss-seem like I'm just complaining that it- it didn't work out..."
"Don't worry, I will talk to her the moment I see her," Violet repeated. "I have an account with you now, Terra. I brought Samantha to you and now it seems like she's hurt you. I won't let that go. If I can't get her to help you, I will do the best I can myself."
"She's ngh-," Terra gasped in a shaky breath. "...I'm not blaming you... th-thank you for trying to help me..."
"You don't have to blame me; the facts of the situation are what they are," Violet said. "Now, will you be okay? Would you like for me to do anything else?"
"I dunno... nhh- can't think of anything," Terra choked out a laugh. "If I knew what'd make me feel better I'd definitely ask for it..."
"Understood," Violet said firmly. "Please take care of yourself."
"Kh-kay, bye..." Terra hung up. Violet was such a strange, logically-minded bunny, yet she seemed to care about things as well in her own, different way. Terra found Violet attractive too, as she was also fit and tall; not to the degree of Samantha, but Violet had once let her kindly know that she wasn't attracted to foxes.
Terra struggled out of the car and went to go get a snack before she had to face the rest of the day; she was starving.
The little fox managed to last the rest of the day without breaking down again, though Terra was sniffling as she walked up to the door of her apartment. Her legs felt weak as she entered, fighting the urge to melodramatically slide herself down to a seated position against her door. Terra vacantly set down her personal effects in the usual place on her counter and stared at her apartment.
It wasn't until she saw that enormous Serendipity plush that she started to cry again. That giant plush sitting there with its happy, cute smile, as if mocking the turn of events she had just been through. Mocking her supposed fortune that turned to bitterness one day later. Terra rushed over to it and tried to pick it up. She thought to throw it away; at least get it out of the front door of her apartment. She struggled, groaning.
"Stupid... ngh...!" Terra growled through her sobs, trying to wrestle with the plush. It was quite heavy for her, and her emotional weakness further compromised her physically. She relented before long, setting the plush back down and collapsing against it, sobbing.
It seemed like no trouble at all for Samantha to carry it to her car as she had done the previous night. Terra whined, trying to separate herself from the plush, but she slumped against it. She closed her eyes.
Terra wished she had listened to her father: that bunnies far outnumbered any other species in Bunnyburrow and tended to make those different from them feel like outsiders at any opportunity.
She wished she had listened to her eccentric sheep friend, Charlie: that sometimes it was better not to take those big chances, lest they hurt you gravely.
She wished she had listened to her rabbit grandfather, Harvey: that the bunnies who were quick to ostracize weren't worth getting close to.
There was another shaking breath from the little vulpine. She especially wished she had listened to her mother: that she needed to cultivate some sort of dream or ambition, and not just do what she liked or felt comfortable to her.
If she had gone to college or gotten a different job, she likely never would have met Samantha. This whole whirlpool of despair and self-pity she was caught in would never have formed.
Terra opened her bleary, teary eyes and looked at her collection of graphic novels, regular novels, and comic books. She had an amount that she sometimes felt some degree of shame over. In the more romantic stories she liked, a night like last night would have been the turning point in the drab existence of this shy, unambitious kit fox. She whimpered, weakly punching the Serendipity plush.
But life wasn't like the stories she enjoyed. No fantastic animals with supernatural powers existed. No great stories of unbelievable adversity met by its perfect but opposite match of heroism were told. Romance wasn't trite and perfectly timed.
Terra sniffled and whined again. That was probably why she liked her graphic novels. Every interesting story she read wildly whisked her away from her own life, which somewhere deep inside, she was ashamed of.
She was just an uninteresting, unambitious little kit fox stuck in a city full of mammals she couldn't relate to; undeserving of respect, admiration, or love.
Her phone rang. Terra was at first apathetic enough to let it ring, but it kept on ringing and Terra wanted the noise to end more than anything. Terra struggled to her feet and walked over to the counter, looking at her phone.
Terra let out a shuddering gasp. Samantha was calling. She choked out another sob, but then grit her teeth, wiping her eyes and fanning her small face with her paws, trying to control herself. She quickly pressed the button to accept the call before it went to her saccharine, chipper voicemail message.
"H'lo? Sam?" Terra tried so hard to make it seem like she wasn't bawling for the last several minutes. She was almost baffled that Samantha had called back so soon in the first place.
"Hi! Terra, hi..." Samantha's voice was manic and cheerful; it sounded coerced somehow, but then she quickly tried to change it into an even, neutral tone. "Uhm... so hi. How are you?"
"I'm okay," Terra blatantly lied. She realized Violet must have talked to Samantha.
"I... Violet talked to me," Samantha said. Terra would have laughed if she didn't feel so hurt.
"Oh..." Terra replied. She coughed and sniffled, gritting her teeth. She knew Samantha was just on damage control now and trying to apologize for crushing the soft little marshmallow the kit fox was.
"Terra, I'm sorry," Samantha's voice had unexpected genuineness. "I didn't know Serendipiday would mean that much to you. I can understand if you don't want to see me again or do the book club thing..."
"Huh?" Terra asked. "Why wouldn't I...?" She didn't know why she said that. At the moment she felt too embarrassed to think about going over to the Hopps compound ever again.
"Just cause... I'm kind of a wreck...?" Samantha groaned, sighing. "First you had me blow up at you last night and then you had me being inconsiderate to you today... I'm just really sorry."
"I uh..." Terra's feelings suddenly burst from her, surprising even her. "...Are you trying to get rid of me?"
"What?" Samantha's voice launched back into panic. "What, no no no!"
"I kinda- I like you, Sam..." Terra understated softly. "You're so strong... I want someone like you in my life. I just-... you know."
"I was only saying that I- I hoped me being so... y'know, weird and broken... doesn't- doesn't put you off," Samantha said dejectedly. "Don't you think you deserve someone better than that?"
"I don't know what I deserve," Terra said blankly. Nothing, probably. "I... I only know what I want."
There was a short pause before Samantha replied. "Me...?"
"I uh..." Terra's voice faltered as her heart warmed and flooded with trepidation. "I can still see you again, right...?"
"Let's meet up tomorrow!" Samantha replied immediately. "Yeah, you wanna come over here? Maybe for dinner? I can apologize in person and it'll be great! Everything will be fine!"
"Tomorrow?" Terra tapped her chin. "I dunno, I was just over there."
"Oh..." Samantha's voice fell off.
Terra giggled lightly and sniffled. It was kind of a mean move, she thought, but she was only half-joking. "I was just kidding. I'd love to come over."
"Great, great!" Samantha's voice boomeranged back into nearly hysterical relief. She let out a big, breathy sigh and her voice became earnest. "In the future, please tell me if I hurt your feelings, okay? I didn't- I didn't intend to."
"It's okay, hehe, I know I'm kind of fragile, delicate... I've heard them all," Terra sniffled again. "Thanks for... giving me a try, I guess? I dunno, are we kind of a thing now?" The fox felt like she was pushing it.
"I... well, if you went by the Hopps family gossip, we are," Samantha's voice sounded wry.
"Well, how do you feel about that...?" Terra wondered, fear clutching her chest and stomach.
"...Just that I really want to see that cute face of yours tomorrow?" Samantha asked cautiously.
"I can deal with that..." Terra closed her eyes, smiling as she absorbed the compliment. "That means I'll get to see your pretty bunny face."
"Pretty?" Samantha sounded legitimately puzzled. Terra giggled and hung up, biting her lip. She set the phone down, balled her paws into fists, and held them close to her chest, looking up with her eyes closed and humming out a slow, relieved breath.
Maybe a chance still remained for her. Maybe she was actually worth something to that attractive bunny after all. Maybe she still had a story to have woven around her like a warm cocoon.
Terra determined she was going to take this chance and follow it wherever it would lead. Even if it hurt her somewhere along the way. Even if she didn't feel completely confident in herself. She giggled in release as her eyes caught on the blank, staring eyes of the still-happy Serendipity plush. Terra launched herself onto it and hugged it.
"Sorry about that," Terra told the plush as she snuggled in and squeezed her arms around it. "You can stay."