Chapter 158: On the March
"Is everything alright, Sister?"
Leliana smiled slightly. Of all their companions, Carver Hawke still chose to use the title she had worn back in Lothering. The others had become so comfortable that most simply called her by her name, even when they were in the company of nobles or any other official types outside of their group.
Of course…Carver was still a newcomer wasn't he, it had not been that long since he had joined them and helped Alim escape from Fort Drakon. Plus, he had had known her as a sister longer than any of the others had. Though they had not spoken much in Lothering she had been aware of Carver, mostly when he came to collect his twin sister Bethany from chantry, the girl had always been willing to help when need called for it.
He had always been a little surly in those days. She had never really inquired why; she had never been the type to pry, even during her time in the cloister. One of the first lessons she had learned in Orlais was that everyone has secrets, back then; she would have sought them out, looking for leverage to use against this person or that. Lothering had been different; she had learned to respect people's privacy.
She nodded in response to his question.
"I am fine, Carver," she said, "I'm just thinking."
"You have seemed a little quiet lately," he said, "Too quiet; perhaps, I just thought you might need to talk."
She chuckled.
"I would not have expected a hardened Fereldan warrior to notice such things," she said.
The boy blushed slightly and looked away.
"I grew up with two sisters," he reminded her with a sheepish smile.
"I had to learn quick when something was wrong."
Leliana nodded. She supposed that would give a young man plenty of experience in noticing when something was amiss.
Of course, that led to another question…
Was there anything amiss?
Everything had seemed to have fallen into place. The army was on the march towards Denerim, the full might of Ferelden now backed up by the allies of the Grey Warden Treaties. Dalish elves had been slipping into Ferelden for months, the Orlesians may have sealed the road ways, but the elvhen hunters knew paths that even the Orlesian army could not block. The might of at least ten clans now marched beside the Ferelden soldiers, most were archers, but a few wore heavier plate, and rode halla like the elvhen knights of old.
King Bhelen had been true to his word, sending forth a might host from his city beneath the mountains. Clad in fine heavy dwarven armor, these brave warriors would be the tip of the spear if it came to break the darkspawn lines, during their first night with these new allies Leliana had wandered the camp, surprised to see how many of these new soldiers sported the brands of the casteless.
It seemed that the dwarf king had been true to his word, making sure that every able bodied dwarf in Orzammar did their duty. If the presence of these offended the warriors from the warrior caste, they did not show it. There was a war against the darkspawn to fight, and if there was one thing a dwarven warrior knew it was slaying darkspawn.
The mages were the smallest group of their allies, the Circle had suffered greatly during Uldred's depravity, leaving only about twenty or thirty mages left to serve the army, these of course were backup up by twice as many Templars, these would serve as both guards and enforcers should the army need it. Battles were chaotic things, a knight lieutenant had told her shortly after their arrival, if one of our charges loses control, it will fall to us to make sure that order is maintained, and no abominations slip through to ravage the army.
It was clear that the Templars did not trust their mage charges, but would obey the orders they had been given, and make sure that the Circle did its part.
If this bothered the mages they did not show it. They marched forward with barely a word of complaint, both young mages and senior enchanters both. She spotted Solona Amell among those leading the charge, but had been unable to speak with the girl. Much occupied the girl's mind now, especially now that they drew so close to facing the enemy.
Yes, everything seemed well, after months of travel and facing dangers too many to truly number, everything seemed to have fallen into place, and yet…not all was right in their camp.
Leliana frowned.
Her Alim, her dearest one, had pushed her away, and she had no idea why.
It had first started as they had marched out of Redcliffe. Though they rode together, as they had for months, Alim seemed hesitant to even look at her, when they did make camp he gravitated towards Alistair and the rest of the officers, getting the army ready for what they would soon face. When he did return to her, he seemed wearier than she had ever seen him, often going to sleep before they had had any chance to speak of what was to come beyond the day's events. When he rose in the morning, he would often rise well before her, heading off to take up his duties as one of the commanders of the army.
There is nothing wrong with this, her conscience chided; he is simply performing his duties as a grey warden. Now that they were finally actively pursuing the darkspawn, it should have come as no surprise that Alim needed to focus on that more than anything else.
Her head knew that to be true, but in her heart…
…she sensed that something had gone wrong.
She could not go to Wynne, though she respected the old mage that did not mean she wished to air any problems she was having with Alim with her. The old woman would no doubt insist that she bring to the two together to discuss things, and that was not something she was quite ready for…not yet at least. Morrigan and Seri likely didn't care, and Kallian, though a friend had her own issues she was dealing with, if what she had heard in passing between her and Fergus were true.
No, she could not speak with the elf, not about this.
She looked over at Carver, perhaps it was because he had come so late to her group that she felt like she could speak to him more freely than the others. He might have stood beside them, but that was because he had no choice, so far, Morrigan had found no way to free him from the spell that bound him to the warden's service.
The young Hawke had not had time to make real connections in their group, connections that could lead back to Alim if she made inquiries that her beloved did not like. She hated thinking such things, but she was feeling more and more lost all the time...
…More than that though it would be nice to have a friendly ear.
Have you heard anything about our war plans?" she inquired, "Are we truly ready to face the Blight?"
Carver snorted at that.
"I'm a lowly soldier," he said, "Not the type to be on the discussion of war plans. I know that Alistair is trying to integrate our new allies into the rest of the army. Dwarves to help cover the archers, Dalish to provide archery to mostly foot units, and mages, of course, ready to use spells to wreak full havoc on the darkspawn."
That is something at least?" she said nodding.
Carver shrugged.
"Of course, the only reason why I heard that much is because I heard Alistair and Theron talking."
He frowned.
"I don't think the officers trust me very much."
Leliana's brow furrowed.
"Why is that?"
Carver snorted again.
"My actions in helping Alim escape from Fort Drakon have not gone unnoticed. The only reason I'm not in irons right now is because the wardens came out on top at the Landsmeet."
He shook his head.
"Most of the officers would have had me hanged as a traitor. They still might try if we fail."
Leliana pursed her lips.
"But you helped us, and it was not like you had any choice?"
"The witch's spell is not really something that I can prove," he reminded her, "And even if I could, some Templars would likely say I should be executed because I am the thrall of an apostate."
He cursed under his breath.
"The only thing good I can say about what has happened is that I have invoked my mistress' whip since coming into the wardens' service. Hopefully…that means the spell is weakening…"
"Perhaps Morrigan's attempts have weakened what was done to you?"
"Maybe," he shrugged, "Whatever happens, I'm the wardens' man until the end of this, if I like it or not."
Leliana nodded. She understood Carver's desire to seek out his family, but even if could, would he want to. If they failed in Denerim, the Blight would spread, perhaps even across the sea.
It was everyone's best interest to make sure that that did not happen.
"You could talk to Alim," she said.
"You would probably have better luck with that than I would."
"Once perhaps," she said furrowing her brow, "not anymore."
For the first time Carver gave her a curious look."
"Is something wrong between you and Alim?"
Leliana shrugged.
"I think he is avoiding me," she admitted, "I was hoping you might have heard something. Perhaps there is something going on, some part of the plan that is distracting him."
"I can't say for sure about that, sister," he said, "Of course, I've spent enough time around soldiers in the last year to know that some try to distance themselves from those they care about before a big battle. They think that it makes it easier; especially when they might be called on to do something…bad."
Leliana frowned.
Was that what this was? Was Alim afraid that he might die in this battle, was that the reason that he was stepping back from her, from what they shared?
"We have faced many dangers together, my Alim and I," she said, "I can't believe that he would not turn to me with his fears. We have been through so much…"
"Maybe that is why," Carver said, "I've heard the wardens say that only they can fight this Archdemon."
"We have defeated dragons before," she reminded him.
"So I've heard," he said, "But a dragon, even a high one is not an Archdemon. An Archdemon is a god, if you believe the tales, or at least it was worshipped as a god."
Carver shook his head.
"That is a lot to face, for anyone, even a grey warden."
Leliana worried her lip with her teeth.
It was a lot to face, as they drew closer to Denerim, she had expected to receive a vision or two, a warning of what waited beneath the dark clouds on the horizon.
So far she had had none.
The visions had just stopped.
She wondered why.
Had the Maker abandoned them, or were they just doomed to fail?
She could not find the answer, either in dream or prayer.
That face scared her more than any battle they might soon face.
"What should I do?" she asked him, "About Alim?"
Carver shrugged.
"I'm not the best person to talk about things like this," he admitted, "I've not exactly had the best of luck in love."
He gave her another sheepish grin.
"I haven't had the best luck with women."
Leliana smiled.
"Perhaps you simply have not met the right woman yet?"
"Maybe," he laughed lightly, "I certainly never expected to speak about this stuff with someone like you."
"What is meant by someone like me?"
"A sister," he added quickly, not wishing to insult her.
"Beth was always the more devote."
Leliana smiled.
"Sometimes all someone needs is a friendly ear. I certainly did, and appreciate you listening to me, and for the advice."
"I'm not sure how helpful I was," he said.
"More than you know," she replied.
She looked over the soldiers before them, she could see Alim's white hat bobbing up and down as they made their way down the road.
She smiled to herself.
She would give him time; they still had some time before they reached the capital. Hopefully by then, he would be willing to talk to her. He had nothing to fear of her, or for her.
No one had ever accepted her the way her dearest had.
She would not judge him. Whatever had happened she would understand.
He had been more than understanding with her.
The least she could do was return the favor. She…
Thunder rumbled from off in the distance, thunder, but something else, something more…
…something far worse.
The sight made her shudder, yet she tried to muster her courage. She offered up a prayer to the Maker and his prophet.
Watch over us all, she thought, Watch over us as we try to save your world.
The sky flashed, even in the day time they could see the multi colored lightning jumping from one distant cloud to the other.
She looked up at the sky, the sun was out for now, but more and more clouds seemed to be coming from the northwest, in the direction of the capital. The days seemed to turn greyer the closer they drew to Denerim; dark clouds whirled in with the approach of a coming storm. Yet this storm could not be called natural, the sky seemed to redden wherever the dark clouds touched.
The Blight was still ahead of them, yet soon they would be under it once again, and then the die would be cast.
Win or lose.
Live or die.
A/N: Next chapter, the arrival in Denerim and the final battle begins. Until next time, dear readers!
DG