Chapter 2 The Relapse

As I drove to the hospital, I couldn't help but feel a dark, deep sense of dread creep up in my soul. I glanced at the passenger seat, just to make sure that the box of macarons was okay. Aimi absolutely adores macarons. Every year on her birthday, I have them imported from France. I like to joke that she would eat them for every meal if she could.

As expected, nothing happened to the box. It still sat there; purple, shiny, and perfect. I knew that Aimi probably wouldn't be up to eating her treats, but I at least felt like I was doing something important. As much of a genius as I am, my specialty is engineering, not medicine. There is very little that I can do to help out with Aimi's situation.

Aimi developed cancer when she was three, so it's possible that she doesn't remember what it was like. Even if she does, the memories are probably very vague. The last time, we were able to fight it off until she could be declared "cancer free." I put cancer free in quotation marks because if she had been completely cancer free, then she wouldn't be in the hospital right now.

I remembered what the doctors told me when I brought her in this time around. They said the cancer was already at Stage IV. I practically collapsed when I heard that. Stage IV?

"How will Aimi be able to survive that?" I asked.

The doctor looked at me with a sad, somber expression.

"She won't," he said.

That brings my blood to a boil. How could this happen to Aimi? It's already bad enough that she had to go through it before. But now to hear that she is going to die? She isn't even eight years old! How is this fair? How is this right?

I pulled into the hospital parking lot and got the macarons out of the seat. While I walked up to the entrance, I started to brood. The doctors and nurses had told me that they would do their best to make sure Aimi was as comfortable as possible. They told me that they cared deeply for my daughter.

Bull crackers. If they really cared about Aimi, then they would do something to help her fight. They wouldn't just sit back and watch her die, they would do everything in their power to keep her alive! Heck, if the world really cared about cancer patients at all, then they wouldn't sell things that give people cancer in the first place. I bet if the world really gave a darn about any of the sick people in it, then it would have found a cure decades ago!

I sighed. I knew that logically, I was being unreasonable. At this point, there was nothing that the doctors could do to help Aimi. Any treatment that they could give her would just prolong the inevitable. Besides, it would make her miserable. I don't want Aimi's last days on Earth to be drenched in pain and misery.

I checked in at the front desk and went to Aimi's room. While walking down the hallway, I bumped into one of the nurses. She had emerald green hair and sea green eyes. She looked beautiful, especially with how her hair was tied up into a messy bun.

"I am so sorry!" I said.

"No, it's okay," said the nurse. A faint glimmer of recognition sparked in her eyes. "You look familiar. Are you a relative of one of the patients?"

"Yes," I said. "My name is Traum Tatsuya. I am here to see my daughter, Traum Aimi."

"Oh, Aimi," she said. She looked genuinely sad. "I've helped to care for her. Do you want me to take you to her room?"

Even though I already knew where Aimi's room was, I nodded my head yes. As the nurse lead me down the hall, I saw real tears flowing from her eyes. I knew that she didn't feel just plain sympathy for me and Aimi. She felt empathy, possibly compassion. I felt like asking her if she had lost a relative to cancer or was a cancer survivor herself, but I didn't do that. It felt like too personal a topic to discuss among strangers. Really, that's all we were: she was the nurse, I was the father of one of her patients. That's all our relationship would ever be. It's strange. There are so many people that you come across in life, yet you can only call a handful of them by name. There are very few people who I can say that I love. There are very few people who are like Aimi to me.

As I walked into Aimi's room, I felt my breathing become slower, my heart rate nearly stop. There she was, in the bed. She still looked more or less the same, with her fair skin and her lavender hair. Yet, she looked different, weaker. Her skin was pale and chalky, her hair had this greasy appearance to it. She looked like she hadn't been exposed to enough oxygen.

"Aimi, you have a visitor," said the nurse.

Aimi looked up from her coloring book and smiled when she saw me.

"Hi, Papa," she said.

I nearly burst into tears. Even her voice seemed to be fighting a war.

"Hi, honey," I said softly. I showed her the box. "I brought something for you."

Aimi smiled.

"Thank you," she said as she took the box. She took out one of the macarons and nibbled on it a little. I smiled, grateful to see her eating.

"So, how are you?" I asked.

"I'm fine," she said.

"Are the nurses being nice to you?"

"Yeah, they are. That one who walked you in was named Haruka. She is really nice; I think you would like her."

I chuckled. Aimi has always been trying to play matchmaker for me.

"I'm not concerned about meeting women," I said. "Right now, my only concern is you."

Aimi looks a little more serious.

"Papa, I'm scared," she says.

I feel my eyes start to water, but I know I can't cry. If I cry, then Aimi will get dejected as well. I can't let that happen. I need to stay strong for her. I put on a little smile.

"Don't be," I said. "Don't think of it as dying. Think of it as...an adventure."

"An adventure?" Aimi asks confusedly.

"Yeah," I say. "You're going to experience something that nobody on the Earth can say they have experienced. You have no idea what's on the other side of death."

"I always thought it was just eternal darkness on the other side of death," Aimi said.

"That may be true," I replied. "But really, we have no way of knowing. We can develop theories, but nobody can say they know for sure. For all we know, it could be amazing on the other side."

Aimi's eyes grew wide.

"Do you...do you think Heaven is on the other side?" Aimi asks.

I smiled.

"I hope so," I said. "Because if it is, that means I'll be able to join you sometime."

Aimi smiled back. Her smile managed to brighten up her face and make her look almost healthy.

"Hey," I said as I leaned forward, "I've given it some thought, and you know what? I really like the name Ruru."

"Really?" Aimi asked.

"Yes," I responded. "I think it is the perfect name for an android."

Aimi giggled.

"So you're going to name her Amour Ruru?" she asked.

"Actually, I think that I'm going to name her Ruru Amour," I said. "I think it sounds nicer if the surname is put last, like they do in the western countries."

Aimi looked thoughtful.

"Ruru Amour," she said. "I like that. I really, really like that."

"I knew that you would," I said. I leaned forward and gave her a hug. Aimi didn't return it, but I could tell that it made her grateful.

"Well, I need to get going," I said once I let her go. "I have work to do and I don't want to overstay my welcome."

"Okay, Papa," Aimi said. I got out of her bed and walked back toward the car. It wasn't until I was halfway down the road that I burst into tears.