Author's Note: Contains mild situational spoilers for a little show called Aggretsuko! If you haven't seen it and want to be super fresh for it, beware!
Nick dramatically burst into the Wet Wolf Whistle, catching his breath in a gasp. It was the middle of the day, and the bar was nearly empty. The fox's eyes seemed as large as a pig's dinner plate, and after a moment's frantic hesitation that he used to visually sweep the area, Nick rushed up to the bar.
"Nick," a brown horse on the other end of the bar greeted him with a relaxed smile. "Why the long face?"
"Ha! Haha!" Nick pronounced, pointing at him with a bright smile. "That's a good one, because you're a horse and all. Jake- Jacob, you gotta do me a favor, buddy."
Jacob's humor started to drain. "What's that?"
"I just- I gotta lay low for awhile," Nick turned his head sideways to look at the door, "could you keep me in the back here? I could wash dishes and all that, whatever you need done."
"...Hang on a second," Jacob narrowed his eyes, "are you in trouble with the cops?"
"No no, no!" Nick bat his paw, laughing nervously. "When have I ever been in trouble with the police? Never, that's what! I am perfectly fine with those boys in blue. Yup."
"...Worse than the police?" The horse kept on him with a fixed glare.
"You, uh, you remember that skunk I met? Buttercup?" Nick held up two claws and pinched them together. "May be in a tiny bit of trouble regarding her."
"That was the one that was into... how did you put it..." Jacob looked off to the side. "'Recreational' shaving?"
"That's the one, alright," Nick smiled and slashed his finger at Jacob, "you wise ol' horse, you. Got a memory like an elephant!"
"Okay, enough with the flattery," Jacob sighed. "You can work in the back for the rest of today. Suits me fine, anyway, we had a call out."
"Thank you, Jake, I owe you big time, buddy," Nick started to head for the back of the establishment, towards the smaller "employees only" door.
"Hey, you gotta at least look the part," Jacob indicated his vest and plain shirt. "Go change into something that makes fewer eyes bleed."
Nick looked like he was being given a death sentence to go back outside, but he obliged, and eventually returned. The horse noted the incredible relief on the fox's face as he checked on him. Jacob tapped a hoof on the door frame, trying to collect his thoughts and figure the situation out. He didn't know Nick to enjoy or even tolerate busywork. Something must have been up. Nick never had much luck with the ladies, but he must have really screwed up to get a skunk annoyed with him. He didn't envy the tod; there were few mammals that could punish a slight against them like a skunk could. Jacob shrugged to himself and left Nick to his own devices.
The fox kept his eye on the clock as he took a break. He didn't even really know if he was "allowed one," but he figured it couldn't hurt, and it'd felt like forever since he'd eaten. The smell of a microwaved fish sandwich wasn't amazing, but it was better than nothing, if only just. He ate it like a mammal starved. Jacob burst into the break room and Nick swallowed a far-too-big bite of his sandwich, coughing.
"There you are, Nick," Jacob said, shaking his head. "Slacking off, huh? Anyway, you're going to be doing another favor for me. Freaking Charlene called in today again, so I'm down one of my better bartenders, when she decides to show up." The horse looked quite cross. "You're not terrible at the whole bar-tending thing. Get out there and do it."
"Wh-wait, what?" Nick blinked. "Oh no, I can't be seen out in public right now. I'll- I'll do whatever work you want me to back here. Emptying the trash? Hey, just call me a garbage fox. I'll get it done."
Jacob looked unamused in the way that only a particularly stern horse could, bunching his lower lip up in anger. "It's either the bar or the street, fox. Don't test my good will."
Nick's pupils shrank. "...I uh... there aren't any polar bears out on the floor, are there?"
"Not that I know of," Jacob started, then caught himself, "wait, why are you concerned about polar bears?"
Nick hemmed and hawed, quite unlike him. Jacob looked like he was on his last nerve.
"Listen, clearly you're not telling me the whole story about what kind of trouble you're in," Jacob folded his arms, "frankly, I don't care to hear it. I also don't care if an angry polar bear ends up plucking you from behind the bar. This isn't some kind of safe haven, and I don't want you bringing any trouble here. Either do the job I need you to do, or get out."
"...I'll... I'll get out on the floor," Nick said, his heart in his mouth. He adjusted his dark vest and tie, and headed out.
A look left and right, and there were no polar bears. Only one bear of any kind, a black bear. That was fine. He didn't know many black bears, and he knew that Mr. Big didn't, either.
Nick steadied himself, took a deep breath, and allowed his mask to form over his muzzle. Nothing was fine, everything was ruined. Wait, that was backwards. But it was actually closer to the truth for Nick. One more centering breath for good measure. What mumbo-jumbo had Yax said that always calmed his nerves? Eh, Nick was pretty sure that some "herbal supplements" were involved in that yak's chill mood.
"Gh!" Nick flinched as he saw the telltale comically-huge ears of a fennec at the far end of the bar. Crap! He didn't even want to see Finnick at the moment. Anyone else that knew Nick or could report where he was was a no-go-
Okay, false alarm. Nick calmed down again. Not only was it not Finnick, but taking half a second to look again, it was a female fennec. Easy mistake to make, right? Heck, people mistook Finnick for a kit all the time. Somehow.
"Hey bartender," the fennec actually started waving her hand to summon Nick. She had a very dry, dull voice. "My friend here is gonna need another beer." She sipped from hers, then pointed at an empty one beside it.
Nick ambled on over and saw a despondent and clearly buzzed-looking male hyena sitting next to the fennec. His head was being propped up tentatively by his hand, and he let out a loud groan.
"He looks like he's had a few," Nick smirked, taking his glass.
"He's good for at least another couple," the fennec replied. "Don't worry, I'll be making sure this big lump gets home okay."
"Nice of you," Nick said, "you taking the house draft?"
"Mmhm," the hyena groaned, nodding. Nick filled it up.
"Girl trouble?" Nick asked sympathetically. The hyena let out a quiet whimper.
"Is it that obvious?" The fennec seemed bemused.
"Nope, this is completely my fault," the hyena composed himself and slashed his paw horizontally. "It's totally- totally my fault. I waited too long. Couldn't just... make a move. No sir. Not me."
Nick carefully set the hyena's beer next to him so it would be safe from his sudden volatile gestures. "Listen, I can't really blame you. Those hyena females can be really intimidating."
The fennec's mouth dropped open in amusement. "Hahahahahahaha." Her laugh was bizarre and monotone, catching Nick's attention. "He's not after another hyena, he's after a red panda. Mutual friend of ours."
"Oh, I see," Nick nodded, then leaned in a bit. "Is she a particularly aggressive red panda?"
"Pff, no," the fennec smiled widely. "Retsuko could probably be mistaken for one of those Anihonese mascot characters. You know the type?"
"Ugh, you see what he's tryna' do, right?" The hyena swiped up his beer and downed a third of it in one gulp. "He's like... he's saying that just 'cause I'm a male hyena, I'm a huge wimp."
"But Haida, you are a huge wimp," the fennec said, deadpan, looking up at him.
He moaned, rubbing his forehead. "Do you havta be so blunt, Fenneko?"
"It's kind of my thing," she replied, starting to play around with her phone. Nick walked off to make sure everyone else at the bar was taken care of. It was kind of a slow night, mercifully, but he kept his ear open for the hyena. Male or not, they could be surly when they got drunk.
"Wh- what are you doing?" Haida muttered, looking down at Fenneko.
"Just checking the social media feed," Fenneko said plainly. "You know, for engagement announcements or anything like that."
Haida yipped. "Fenneko! Don't even joke about that! They've been on what, one date!?"
"Hey, it could happen," she retorted dully, "you know she's been trying to get out of her job for awhile now."
"I know, but... ugh," Haida looked pitiful, slumping in his seat. "Where did I go wrong, Fennneko? I kept- I was trying to give her space... just kept being nice to her and... well, hoped something would spark up, I guess."
"Well, in case you haven't noticed," Fenneko didn't even lift her eyes from her phone, "Retsuko isn't exactly a genius. If she was, maybe she wouldn't let everyone at work walk all over her all the time. Maybe you could have tried being a little less subtle."
"Too late now," Haida muttered.
"Probably not," Fenneko said, "I just can't get a read on this guy's Muzzlebook. It's like he's a potted plant."
"What, you don't think it's gonna work out?" Haida grunted, though he sounded more defeated than desperately hopeful.
"Hard to say; weird, I can usually get a better read than this..." Fenneko looked mildly bothered. Nick almost smirked at overhearing this; she was a fox, after all. He also prided himself on his ability to read other mammals. He wondered if he should use it at the moment.
The fox ended up coming over to check on Haida. "Everything all right, sir?"
"No," Haida muttered, but looked at his still half-full beer, "but I'm good on beer for now."
"Listen, you want my advice?" Nick leaned in.
"Ss-sure."
"Assuming he remembers it in the morning," Fenneko quipped dryly.
"No one's gonna make an opportunity for you," Nick replied. "You have to make all your own chances. Trust me, I know. I've been at this awhile." Nick shook his head. "No one's just going to swoop in and give you the one thing you've always wanted. You have to make it happen."
"Rgh... I know, but..." Haida slapped his forehead and let his paw slough off, "I mean, what if it's not meant to be? I'd hoped something would click between us by now."
"He's been at this off and on for five years," Fenneko looked up at Nick, her chin resting on laced fingers.
"Some mammals don't know what they want 'til it's shown to 'em," Nick shrugged. "But you have to go for what you want."
"...Egh, I dunno," Haida wagged his head. "Even if this thing with Resasuke doesn't work out... should I really make a move? Is it worth risking my friendship with her just... because- cause why...?"
"Cause you want some Retsuko booty?" Fenneko asked in a mildly coy voice, tilting her head in the hyena's direction.
"Fenneko!" Haida grit his teeth, his lower jaw bulging out a little.
"Cuddles, then?" Fennko smirked.
"Nrgh..." Haida grabbed at his head with both hands.
"Hey, listen," Nick told him. The hyena looked back up. "If you really wanna leave it under wraps, you can't show anyone they get to you. Right? You don't wanna look like a 'typical male hyena'? Then keep a stiff upper lip."
"Pff, that's a laugh," Fenneko huffed. "If he does that, then mammals are gonna know something's up."
"He's right, though," Haida rolled his eyes. "If I start acting all pouty at work, that's not going to be good. I'll have to dodge questions from everyone- especially from Retsuko. I'll just- just have to live with what's going on, for now."
"What a trooper," Fenneko smiled faintly.
"But if the opportunity presents itself...," Haida suddenly sat straight up, "I'm gonna go for it!"
"Hahahaha," Fenneko said, again pronouncing a monotone laugh. "Sure you will. ...Still, I'd like to see it happen. At least that way I'd know what she'd be getting into." She continued restlessly poking at her phone.
Satisfied that that was as good as it was going to get, Nick left them alone for the rest of the night. They weren't there long, and it looked pretty comical for a fennec to try keeping a hyena "steady". It consisted of her riding on his shoulders, trying to keep his head straight. Nick was pretty sure they'd be fine.
He wasn't so sure about himself.
"Good job tonight, Nick, thanks," Jacob said casually. "This still isn't official stuff, but here." The horse handed Nick a decent sum of bucks. "Figure that's a little bit more than minimum wage for your time."
"I appreciate it, really I do," Nick replied gratefully.
"You got somewhere to go?"
"Sure, sure I do," Nick nodded, grinning.
A glass house, he mentally rolled his eyes. He'd wished he'd followed up on some of his own chances, but it was too late for that. Right now, he had to focus on staying alive. Thankfully, no polar bears in or outside the Wet Wolf Whistle. But where else to go? "Home?"
Nick's mother still wasn't on good terms with him. Plus, that'd probably be putting her into not insignificant danger.
His own apartment? He didn't exactly feel safe there. Finnick's van was a death trap by itself, and he didn't want to give Finnick the chance to rat him out. They were acquaintances, but maybe not the best of friends. Imposing on him seemed like a bad idea. Thinking about it, he did know of a place where he could be alone and undisturbed.
It was a dingy little bridge in the middle of nowhere in Downtown Zootopia. A few broken down buildings, and not another mammal for a mile. This would probably be safe. He set up some blankets and cardboard and tried to huddle up under the bridge.
"Nick what are you doing?" He asked himself. "How long are you going to try to fly by your tail? It's gonna get you killed one day. Almost did today."
The sound of the crickets was deafening.
Ah well, tough it out, Nick thought to himself. My ancestors did this all the time.
One day, Nick would have to make his own chance, like he'd suggested that hyena do. Presumably, this one would not be trying to sell a scandalously obtained skunk rear-end rug to a crime boss that had graciously given him shelter.
"Ugh, what was I thinking? Nick moaned.
The morning would come, though, and Nick would be free to pursue another hustle.
"I'll go smaller this time," Nick told himself. "Less dangerous. Pawpsicles, or something..."