Into the Array C13
I wish I have a bathroom that nice.
Teas are served under the shade of giant trees on a sturdy porcelain table and stool. Overlooking a giant pond filled with lotus and koi, the long-awaited breeze brought sighs of relief from the two sweaty men.
"Your 9th brother is really beautiful. I was ... very smitten by him." Ivan quietly spoke. He knew he was speaking the obvious, but perhaps, speaking it out loud to someone, anyone would be better than keeping it held up inside his heart. Its driving him insane.
"I know." Hsiao Zheng commented. "I can see your eyes brighten with that same intensity as many before you."
Ivan looked at him, an inexplicable pang of jealousy shot through him. He held it back, not knowing what to do with it.
"Oh really?" Is what Ivan wanted to say it, but instead his mouth blurted out "as many before me." Was what he said instead.
"Yeah." Hsiao Zheng, raising his cup of tea and gulping down in a go. "That's the magic of my 9th brother. The ability to make anyone feels all weird and do stupid things. And that's not even an understatement, so you shouldn't feel bad about yourself.'
Ivan chuckled. "Indeed, I do feel like I was under a spell."
"Don't harp too much on it my friend, else you will fall badly."
"I hope not." Ivan replied, glancing to the side of the table, he recalled his original purpose of his visit. Since he was cooled enough to continue functioning. He started preparing his paints and canvas, while doing so he begins his procedure.
He recalled the last time he asked about Yao from Mu, and it did not end well. Ivan decided against asking about him again, besides it makes more sense to ask about the subject of the portrait itself isn't it.
"You look like a man that live life to its fullest, please share with me, the greatest regret you ever have in your life to the present moment. It can be about anything." Ivan started nonchalantly, preparing his paintbrush as he started dipping into the generous amount of paint.
"Wow, you sure know how to ask questions that hits home." Zheng said, eyes dimming a little.
Ivan look back to Hsiao Zheng with a little sense of guilt, before hastily adding on "Ah, if it's not something you wanted to share, we could always change the topic."
Zheng let out a laugh. "No no, it's something I always want to share. Just don't cry when I am done."
"What.." Ivan knitted his brow at this blatant declaration of challenge.
Hsiao Zheng took a deep breath.
"It all happen 7 years ago, I finally managed to convince my Father to allow me to travel. I was to keep my identity a secret outside to protect myself and I was more than fine with that arrangement. I was a young man plague with a heavy sense of wanderlust. I was reckless, and I was carefree and hungry for adventures that no city can keep me entertained for more than a few months.
Of course, Fate always have their way with things and one breezy day, while I was on a rented boat on a so-called famous stretch of river, I heard the most striking piece of music from a Zither in my life. It was so beautifully played that I swore upon my life at that moment that I need to see this person. I urged the boat master to row in closer to the row of houses with wide balconies by the side of the river to where the music is.
'Sir, those are this city's most famous prostitute house. That's why this river is famous in the first place. The madams in those houses will not appreciate us looking at their flowers without any money."
At this point I was getting a little anxious because I can almost feel like that piece is coming to an end and I thought it would be my greatest regret to not know how the person playing it will look like.
So I said sternly to the man "Gold? I have no lack of gold, just row me there. I'll reward you handsomely and deal with any troubles myself."
The boat master's eyes glitter at the sound of gold and rowed us there immediately. Wooden bamboo flaps were down to conceal the interior, but fate once again seems to be in my favour, a particularly heavy breeze blew all the flaps up. And on one of the balconies sat one of the most beautiful little thing in my life.
Her name is Junpei, also known as Xiaoxiao to her customer. With my influence and wealth, I booked and visited her every night. We had so much fun, talking about everything under the stars. She is a very intelligent and open-minded women, and she would have made a very good officer if she is not a woman.
She came from a poor family who sold her to a brothel. And I lied to her saying that I was just a man from a merchant family studying to take the imperial exams.
The constant booking instantly elevated her status within the brothel. And my daily visit to her means that her other customers does not have access to her at all.
It was really fun being around her. And I really couldn't care about anything at all in this world.
But a lie is a lie, imperial exams is just around the corner and I had to leave no matter what.
I remember that I was so swept up in the moment that I promise her valiantly that I will come back for her and I will redeem her once I become the scholar.
I left. Not intending to return. I promised. With full intention to break them. That was my biggest mistake.
I was still a man struck down with a deep sense of wanderlust and I felt that staying in a place for this long was too much of me. But it was no longer the same for me, not anymore, my mind is always filled with her. Everything I do, I find myself thinking that it would be fun with her around. Everything I see, I find myself wanted her to see it too.
That was when I realise that I have fallen madly love with her.
I travelled back to that city immediately. I wanted to redeem her, I wanted to be truthful to her. I wanted her to see the world with me. I want to see her eyes to brighten at the sight of things I have describe. I just.. just wanted to be around her again.
But alas, I was too late.
That day was as memorable as the day when I first met her. For all the wrong reasons. I went back to the same flowery street, in a distance, crowds are gathered near the entrance of the same brothel as Xiaoxiao. I rushed over, squeezing through the crowds just to get a glimpse of what happened.
That image was seared into my brain, haunting me to this very day.
She laid on the ground in bridal red. Splattered pink spread out from her head across the ground like a cherry blossom tree. Blood dripped down the moss-covered pavement. The mumblings around me blurred into the distance, my eyes fixated on the scene.
"Her make up is ruined." was all I could find myself muttering, the only semblance of thought I could muster in the face of the intense void left in my heart.
Subsequently, I heard from regular patron of brothel that she hesitated when she jumped, eyes wandering through the crowds again and again as though she is looking for someone.
Another time, I heard from another customer that she kept asking for the news of a man from a merchant family in the city. Recalling the top scholars of the year that was heavily celebrated in the capital, my lies started unravelling. I found out that the alias I have used and the lies I have told her came true in the form of another man. There was a man with the same name, with the same family I have describe, taking the imperial exam and in a perfect twist of fate, became the top scholar of that imperial exam. He went home in great glory and married his childhood sweetheart.
Her sisters in the brothel slapped me when I asked about her, they told me she waited every single day, heated the wine every single time ever since the imperial exam's result broke. Yet every single day she had to serve the customers brought on by his reckless bookings and nightly visits.
The story of Xiaoxiao became talks of the town, some said that she is deserving for not being able to let go of a man. Men said that she is a loyal girl that all men should have.
Leaving her is my greatest regret, one that would last till the day I die, but there is absolutely no one I could say it to.
So now I wander again, this time with her around."
Hsiao Zheng pulls out a simple round locket that holds some greyish powder from under his clothing and look at it lovingly. "It might sound creepy to you, but when she died, I held some of her ashes with me when I travel. Only when she is closest to my heart that this void can be filled. We can't be together in life, but I hope that when the day I die, I will be able to be with her."
Ivan's head peek out from behind the canvas bawling, he tried to keep up with his professional front and replied "T-that's a very interesting story." But could continue no longer.
The 12th prince open his fan once again and fanned himself, laughing out loud and said "Indeed."
The rest of the session lasted for some time, but Ivan's heart ache for a story that is not his. Sniffling and wiping his eyes blurred from tears, he managed to finish most of the outline and the eyes of the 12th prince. A pair of eyes filled with the same carefree attitude that grace his strides, it glints with the wonder life have to offer on the surface but darkened with the loneliness he has bestowed on himself beneath.
It was the 12th prince soul that was bared on this portrait.
And it was what Ivan strive to achieve for them all in this project.
The sun is setting down the horizon, casting a glorious red and yellow across his surroundings. Ivan replied with gusto to the 12th prince that he does not need any help walking back to his own room and might explore on his way back. Bad choice, being alone exposed himself to his own thoughts, and he cried again at the 12th prince's story.
Out from an alley, a hand reached out and grab Ivan by his arms, it pulled the startled man into the alley.
"Ahh.." he cried out, but also tripping in the process. Landing on the ground ungracefully beside the feet of another person.
"My god, you are a clumsy boy." The person commented.
Ivan looked up in anger and found himself greeted with the face of Yao. The 9th prince's eyes soften at the sight of Ivan's tear stained face, a little shocked to say the least.
"W-why are you crying? I.. I just pulled you in with that little strength only" Yao tried to defence himself immediately.
"I… " Ivan started, but sigh and said: "I'm just a cry baby I guess. "
Yao squat beside him and patted on his head. "That's okay, big brother is here."
Ivan looked back at that smiling face, eyes trailing and perhaps stared at him for a little too long without saying anything. To the extent that Yao must cut him off, "I know I am very pretty but please don't stare at me for too long." He snapped his fingers in front of Ivan's face, snapping him out of the trance he didn't know he was in.
'Goodness, I thought we are over that." Yao rubbed his temple in a worrisome manner.
"I-I'm sorry for being rude." Ivan said.
"That's okay." The 9th prince shrugged. "I'm used to it."
Ivan wanted to hide in a hole, he recalled their encounter from before. And now he was being obnoxiously rude.
"Come with me." Yao demanded.
"Ah?" Ivan let out in shock, "T-To where?"
"My place."
"Ah?"
"To paint."
"Oh."
"Let's go big boy." Yao declared, lightly kicking the Ivan on the floor to get him moving.
Ivan sprung into actions and follow the beautiful man to his place.
The sun is already setting when they reach Yao's place, there are lotus ponds and fishes, the usual stuff in the palace. Ivan followed Yao into his room where all his painting materials are already waiting in the room, right beside his pink bed. Everything is pink here like a girl's room if you ignore the fact that there are various masks and weapons lined up in pristine array peeking out from another room linked to his pink bed room.
Yao said down on the stool, sulking a little in contemplation. Then he said to Ivan "You know I've been thinking if I should wear my mask for the portrait."
"No!" Ivan retorted in an instant.
"But why, I felt it was part of me. Isn't that what you are looking for?"
"That's not you. I know that's not you."
Yao snorted, and look at the man in front of him incredulously. "What do you know, huh?"
Ivan avoided his gaze in embarrassment. Yao was right, what does he know. But he felt in the pit of his gut that he knows, that's not Yao. Gut feelings can't convince people though.
"I'll decide that. Just tell me your story and I'll decide if I will be adding in your scary masks." Ivan said.
"Hmmm…. Okay. That sounds fine by me."
Ivan quickly get to work, setting up his canvas and paint once again. While Yao sat there looking at his every move, occasionally asking this and that.
"So, what kind of stories do you want to listen to? My war exploits? I have tons, I think I have stories that can last for 99 days!" Yao boasted, eyes brightening at his own incredible feats.
Ivan glance at that man people called a Devil. He looks just like a child at that moment.
"Hmmmm… Nope. You can save that for later. But.. I do want to know what you did to make you father that furious. He seems… to hate you." Ivan started, knowing full well that he is treading on some dangerous boundaries. He kept his eyes on the canvas, a little fear from Yao's potential adverse reaction.
Luckily, Yao's reaction is merely disappointment.
"Ehh.. Why would you want to know such boring stuff?" Yao lamented.
"Is it?"
"Yeah, it's just some common palace politics I guess." Yao started, sighing a little as he starts his recollection. "Hmm… How do I start… I think my Father hates me because I look just like my mother."
"Your mother?" Ivan look back at Yao.
"Yeah, my mother looks just like me. I'm just a taller version of my mother!" Yao said happily. "I can see that you are doubting me, come I'll show you." He continued, standing up and pulling Ivan along to another part of his house, to a study room where a particularly eye catching water painting hang by the side of the wall. It was a woman dressed in pure white, and soot black hair, blood red lips and innocent pure eyes looking back. It's the 9th prince dressed as a woman.
"Isn't that just you." Ivan asked.
"That's my mother."
Ivan looked at the portrait and back to him again, to the portrait and to him again. No matter how you looked at it, it looks just like Yao.
"If you know how to recognise the palace stamps, you can see that the palace artist has written the year he drew her, besides, the artist died before I was even born."
Closing in, Ivan knitted his brow. Ignoring the fact that the artist died, the year was indeed ages ago. The yellowing on the paper caused by oxidation also proves his words.
"If so, why would he hate you?" Ivan asked. "If I have a wife this beautiful, I think I would treasure her forever and give her everything she wanted."
Yao snorted, shaking his head. "Well, if my Father thought the same as you, things would be great!"
"What did he do?"
"My Father promised her the position of the Queen, and promised that she will be the last wife he will ever take in. My mother came from a village of ritual maiden, she made a name for herself for being one of the most beautiful people around. So much so that the crown prince himself requested her presence during a ritual. And well you know the rest.
My Mother was a considered a lowly human holding a sacred job. My Father was a coward, when he became the Emperor, he made another women Queen, and he married so much more. So, my Mother, stricken with grief and betrayal, slowly grew vindictive and horrid. She tried to throw me in the ponds when I was a baby and I was immediately taken away from her.
I only managed to see her a few times throughout the times she was alive. Sometimes she was that kind mother who would stuff me full of treats and love me. Other times she would throw curses at me and called me a reminder of a failure in her life. And then some other times she would instigate me to overthrow my Father and take over as the Emperor."
"Wow… Your mother is pretty…" Ivan said.
"Crazy, yes." Yao finished. "But she is still my beloved mother. And that's why I protect this face, it's the only thing that reminds me of her. I can pretend that my mother is looking after me when I look into the mirror."
Ivan nodded, glancing at Yao. The 9th prince's eyes gaze longingly at the mother that almost never existed in his life, and hint of sadness glazed the glossy eyes.
Ivan don't really want him to be sad. A devious smile spread across his cheek and he place quietly move his forefinger at the side of Yao's cheek, and called out to him.
"Yao."
Yao turned around and his cheek was poked by Ivan's finger. Explosive anger burst out of the prince at this childish antic, "Oh my god! How old are you!" Yao moved away from his fingers in disbelief, rapidly slapping his fingers in a kidding manner.
Ivan laugh at how cute his reaction is.
The sadness glazing his eyes is gone, replaced by the childish haughty air that Ivan believes suit him more.
Finally settled down, Yao asked "Are you done with your painting though? I'm sleepy."
"Do you think I'm a God like you? I am just an artist with a pair of hands. I still have so much things to ask you, don't fall asleep." Ivan said, eyes moving from the canvas to the sleepy Yao.
"Tomorrow." Yao slurred.
"Fine fine, you.. you must bring me back though. I can't navigate myself in the dark."
"There are guards outside. Just ask them to bring you back."
"I don't want to."
"Tsk." Yao knitted his brow, annoyed at Ivan. "Fine, just stay here, there's another room in this house anyway. Just sleep there. Ahhh, I'm really sleepy, let's take a bath."
Ivan look at Yao standing up and go, wondering if he heard it wrongly.
Yao turned back and gestured Ivan. "Come on."
They reach the grand bathhouse inside Yao's house, Ivan stared in awe at the 4 bronze dragons each spewing water at the 4 corners into the big pool in the middle of the room. Cooling breeze from the cold water greeted the two man standing side by side, it was a refreshing take from the sultry weather these days.
"This is the best thing about home. My beautiful bathroom, isn't it the best?" Yao bragged proudly. He looks even more proud of his bathroom than his conquest on the battlefield.
Ivan silently wonder if Yao just wanted to show off his bathroom instead of genuinely inviting him for a bath together.
'You are very welcome to join me for a bath anytime. You can even just visit me just to take a bath!" Yao told Ivan excitedly. Then he suddenly sighs and lamented "It's been so long since anyone joined me for a bath! I've been asking my 11th and 12th brother to join me but none of them wanted nowadays."
"Why not? This is such a good bathing room. Much better than bathing in a tub." Ivan replied.
"I know right. Such a pity. No worries, come on in." Yao said, walking in and disrobing himself. The pink clothing slipped down smoothly off his shoulder and trailed down quickly against his pale and slender body. His firm muscle moves with every move his made.
Ivan swallowed a mouthful of saliva at the sight. His face flushed and he finally realise why the 11th and 12th prince refuses to take a bath with him. He felt himself hardened, his thoughts running wild. He quickly glances to the side, away from Yao, breathing heavily to calm and distract himself.
"Please calm down please calm down please calm down." Ivan muttered under his breath, closing his eyes, he repeated the mantra over and over.
"Hey, what are you standing there for! Take off your clothes and get in." Yao called out. "Come on!" he gestured, throwing in flower petals into the pool.
Taking a final deep breath, Ivan turned back. He is still hard, he can't help it. But he can lie.
"Wow, it's actually pretty cooling here. It's so easy to catch a cold. I think I will keep my clothes on to bath." Ivan laugh casually.
"What are you talking about?" Yao asked, looking up at him in disgust. "Who baths with their clothes on. Take it off."
"Nuh-uh. I'm keeping it on" Ivan said as he slowly goes into the pool with his clothes on.
Yao narrowed his eyes at Ivan.
"What?" Ivan asked nervously, gulping again.
"I'll strip you." Yao declared, smiling deviously and pouncing on the startled Ivan. Ivan quickly tried to swim away but was held back by Yao who tug and pull at his clothes.
"Go away, you pervert." Ivan shooed, upper half of the clothes pulled down by Yao.
Yao, a man who loves himself the challenge retorted "Yes, I'm a pervert and I will make sure you bath naked with me. It's not like I haven't seen anything you have before.'
"S-So? You pervert. I'll tell the whole world you're a pervert for stripping a man." Ivan threaten childishly.
Yao laugh maniacally. His wet black hair sticking to his pale, beautiful body is not making anything better, Ivan silently berated Yao, wanting to tell him so much that he will be the one committing a sin if Yao doesn't stop it.
Ivan sulked as he looks over at the prince, holding his wet clothes to himself. He might as well be the first to strike, smiling, he pounces at Yao in the water. Holding both of his wrist tightly, Yao was caught off guard. In the water, Yao's black hair stretches out like an enchanting tentacle, his eyes stared in shock at Ivan's almost purple ones.
That's when Ivan recalled thanking his God, for creating such a beautiful thing.
Yao quickly came to his senses and surface up to the water.
Ivan followed.
'Hah! I won." Yao said smugly.
Ivan look at himself, realizing that he was naked as well. And he was still as hard as he thought, even in this cold water.
"Wow, you're incredible." Ivan praised awkwardly, steadily swimming away from Yao, hoping he didn't see anything.
"Are you a virgin?" Yao asked, then proceeded sink almost half of his face in the water, big eyes staring Ivan expectantly. "My 11th brother always get hard for no reason."
"Of course not." Ivan retorted almost instantly.
"Hmmm… Then you must not have done it in a long time." Yao answered thoughtfully. "Don't worry, I'll help you settle it."
"There's no need." Ivan replied in shock, face angry red with embarrassment.
"Come on, there's no need to stand on ceremony. In this country, when the Emperor, Prince and Princesses want something, they get it! I'll get you the best girl tomorrow."
"Ah?" Ivan turned to Yao.
"Or do you prefer man? Some men did it better so it's really up to you." Yao replied.
Ivan almost said it out, that he would rather wish it's him. But he did not.
Yao narrowed his eyes at Ivan, leaning in closer and closer and finally he whispers, "If you tell my 11th brother what I said about him I will kill you."
Ivan nodded.
Yao slapped on Ivan's shoulder down hard, "Great! Now we are brothers!" and it's followed immediately with a sneeze.
"Let's get out, you're catching a cold." Ivan nagged.
"You are right." Yao said.
They got out of the pool, dried themselves and got dressed. It was getting late at night, and the cold night breeze blew pass the two.
"Oooo, that's cold." Yao rubbed his goose bumps down happily. It's been so long since he had fun in the bathroom. Maybe next time he can invite more people to join him.
Yao bring Ivan to the extra room and finally realise the state it's in.
"There's the room." He announced shamelessly. "You can sleep here for the night."
Ivan look at the dusty state this room is in, thick spider webs covered the corner, and a layer of dust covered every open surface of the room. He looked back at Yao and knitted his brow, no matter what, he is still a relative of the King where he came from. Asking him to live in such a shitty place tick him off.
"I don't want to." Ivan retort.
"I have no more space." Yao replied.
"I'll sleep with you." Ivan announced shamelessly.
"No! I don't like sleeping with anyone!"
"Then you can sleep here. I'm sleeping on your bed." Ivan said, walking in big strides back to Yao's pink room.
"Hey! No! I don't want to sleep here. I'm the master how can I sleep here!"
Ivan sat on the inside of the bed with his arms crossed pouting like a kid. "I'm sleeping, goodnight!" and promptly lie down.
"Tsk." Yao stared at the man on his bed, resigning to his fate. He lies down back to back with the man and slept.
The night passed on silently. And Yao, in his bad habit, huddled closer and closer to the man beside him as he would with any other things lying on his bed.
The fortune teller said that he was the child of the God of War, reincarnated to this world because of his father's sin. The bloodlust innate within this boy can only be sated on the battlefield, he must never touch blood else he can only be destined to live amongst the carnage.
Fear and reverence, the only two things he knows all his life. Yet, the only thing he ever craved for is love.