Disclaimer: The Mentalist, its characters and universe belong to Bruno Heller and CBS. I'm only a fan, writing this for love of this TV show and personal pleasure.

A.N.: This is for 2x13 "Redline". Just expounding a little on Jane's line of 'Why does everyone else get to have a normal life?' and what that means.

Loving Him was Red

Normal

Lisbon drove the car down to Marin County as they went in search of this Walter Mashburn character who had turned up in their investigation. As the winding roads took them closer to the ocean, Jane could feel his spirits lifting and he decided to revisit the topic the two of them had been discussing after leaving the victim's boyfriend's apartment.

"You know, I understand why I can't have a normal life," Jane commented offhandedly as he glanced at Lisbon. It went without saying that his life was far from normal, and for the most part he didn't mind it, despite his earlier bitter comments. There wasn't a lot of room for dating or other so called normal things when he was otherwise occupied by a life-consuming revenge plan, besides many other issues of guilt, self loathing and grief. "But you, Lisbon, you could lead a fairly normal life. What's stopping you?"

"Uh, you," she raised her eyebrows at him in response. "My life seems to constantly revolve around me cleaning up your messes. Doesn't leave me much time for anything else."

"Oh haha," he smiled calmly back at her. "Seriously. What's the issue?" Truth be told, he knew she also had a series of intimacy and trust issues that would probably take days to properly get into, but he wanted to give her the opportunity to share them, if she felt so inclined. Or at least give her another chance to vent some more.

"Seriously?" She raised an eyebrow at him.

"Yes, seriously," he told her earnestly. "I once had quite a normal, happy life. Didn't you ever want something like that? You know, a big house, a husband, a couple of kids, that sort of life."

Lisbon frowned a little at him, wondering what was the angle he was playing at. After a moment's consideration she went against her better judgement and decided to be honest with him. It was only fair, right? She was constantly asking for his honesty, so she might as well give him some of hers. "Well, a long time ago I thought about it," she said, nodding along her words. "When I was a kid and especially after my mom died… But that was literally another lifetime ago. Nowadays, my life is my job." She finished with a casual shrug.

"You could still date," Jane commented, thinking that sounded reasonable enough. "Rigsby and Van Pelt can obviously manage it. Even Cho has a girlfriend."

"I don't have time for dating either," she protested as she frowned at him once more. "It's hard to find someone when there are calls in the middle of the night to go out to crime scenes all over the place."

"That's an excuse," he smiled at her one of his annoyingly knowing smiles. "So many people have all sorts of demanding jobs, yet they still manage to maintain a social life. We've been working together for what, three years now? I've seen you meet all sorts of interesting fellows who would love to wine and dine you, but you never seem to give them a chance."

"What are you, my shrink now?" She countered in annoyance. If possible, her frown became even more pronounced. He only grinned back at her, and she felt compelled to defend herself. "I do go out on occasion, but working for the CBI and catching murderers is an all-time consuming job. It's hard to find someone who wouldn't mind being second place to my career. Besides anyone I do go out with starts to annoy me sooner or later. I prefer to keep things casual."

"Well, I annoy you on a daily basis and we seem to do fine," Jane noted in good humor, slightly raising his eyebrows at her.

"That's because I'm forced to work with you and I have to restrain myself from killing you, as that would put me in jail," Lisbon replied promptly with a sarcastic smile. "Guys I go out with? If they annoy me then I just stop seeing them."

"Ah the old 'use them and lose them', huh?" He grinned and wiggled his eyebrows at her.

She glared at him askance, but after a moment her lips melted into a quiet smile. "To be honest, at the end of the day, I just want to go home and read a nice book or see a movie and… that's it." She said with a simple shrug. "Dating, getting to know someone, it takes a lot of energy and time that I just don't have."

"Time is relative. We can always make time for things that interest us," he argued once more.

"There you have it. No one interests me, then," she quipped back at him. That much was true. There hadn't been anyone interesting enough that she'd be willing to make sacrifices to include in her life.

"I'm just saying, you could be missing out on something great," he commented lightly.

"And I'm saying that I think what I have now is already great, thank you very much," she countered in a calm yet firm tone. "Who says I need to have a house with the white picket fence and a dog, a husband and 2.5 kids to be considered normal and happy? Why can't I be perfectly satisfied with the life I have, doing a job I love, surrounded by colleagues and friends I like, respect and admire?"

"Society, Lisbon," Jane quipped back at her. "Society is always telling us that. But you're right," he added in softer tones. "If you say you're happy, then that's all I could ever want for you."

He gave her one of his genuine kind smiles, and she returned him one of her own. The two of them were far from what most people would call normal, but in the grand scheme of things they did have a good life.

"So am I one of those people you like, respect and admire?" Jane asked her with a playful grin.

"Sometimes," she said, a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. "Other times you're the cause of most of my tension headaches."

"Touché," he laughed softly back at her.

Pretty soon they were upon the Catamaran Club, back to the business of murder.

A.N.: I'm sort of using Lisbon as my spokesperson here. I'm in that phase of my life where I'm in my early thirties and finding a husband or even dating is the farthest thing from my mind. I just want to do my job and live my life the way I want to, but some people insist on problematizing it, saying there's something wrong with me. If I think I'm happy, then what's the problem with that?