Here is another chapter, not a great one but please give feed back.
My heart twisted and sunk with nerves as I sat in front of the computer. The white light enveloped me, coldly, as I shook. My breaths came in sharp pants and I tried to gain control, but nothing was working. This was the first email being sent to Gianna, she would print it and walk the long cold tunnel to hand it to him.
"My sincere apologies,
I have been very preoccupied since my return to Washington, the weather is gloomy and as known, I would enjoy it. Returning to a normal school setting is much more burdensome than thought, but it is doable. I do hope all is well back home and hope Gianna lives by handing you a letter from myself.
Give my love to all.
Other than her.
I will send more regular updates and check my own email for any you have Gianna send me.
Caprice-"
It was simple enough.
I tried to breathe calmly, but every time I looked up those words I had known long before the email finished. Words I had waited for with anxiety and worry, knowing, somehow, what I might have to say.
Slowly, the panic and anxiety attack flowed away, and yet I still shook. My eyes, closed and aimed towards my clasped hands, slowly opened. Trepidation swelled through me as I slowly raised my eyes yet again to the steadily shining screen. I don't have to mention them yet, but soon enough I will and he might not be too thrilled. I shake my head violently. I pound it down again and again, but my thoughts will not dislodge themselves. They will drive me insane. Make me into a monster. But yet I keep them deep inside, close to my heart they abide. They are my worst enemies, yet my closest friends.
I just have to stop this chaos ragging in my head, standing up seeing my room in top shape nothing out of place. In my own home, there is no aroma or at least none I ever notice. Yet the fragrance in my own room was very different it was a swirling mass of jasmine, honeysuckle, and a few spices it was home to me. Haphazardly draped over my lounge chair was my white crop tee, ripped light blue jeans and an old flannel with faded red, black, and white.
After my boots are on there is nothing left here to do, my hair was down and a brush runs through it when my cell went off. It was Bella, she was with Theo today since Rose and I are still working on her beast. I hurried from the door sending her another text. "He gets you forever, I need time too," it was a running joke now.
There is no sky today, only a rough woolen blanket of mottled grey to cover us all and block out the sun. Taking to the main road, it was the one that would lead nearly everywhere, but here I am heading to the school.
The Volvo of doom was yet to arrive, I hated how much I noticed Edward it was so fucking pitiful of me. But Bella's golden retriever was waiting with a smile and a wave.
"Hey Mike," he was annoying at best but he was a good friend to Bells.
"So," Mike said, looking at the floor, "Jessica asked me to the spring dance."
"That's great." I made my voice bright and enthusiastic. "You'll have a lot of fun with Jessica." It was starting to rain in a downpour.
"Well…" He floundered as he examined my face, clearly not happy with my response. "I told her I had to think about it." He was dense as any man that I ever met.
"Why would you do that?" I let disapproval color my tone, though I was relieved he hadn't given her an absolute no but in the end, I thought he was an idiot.
His face was bright red as he looked down again, I knew he had wanted to go with Bella.
"I was wondering if… well, if you might be planning to ask me."
I paused for a moment, he was stupid. I noticed while he was talking they arrived. Each was watching with smiles, all but Edward and Bella. "No, sorry but not at all attracted to you. But get with it, Jessica is and you should know how lucky you're she even does," it was not the best conversation and I was blunt and rude but he needed a wake-up call.
His eyes flicked over to Edward before another frustrated sigh was coming out, "Well,"
I cut in, "Don't take it wrong, we're friends and your pretty cool but just not my type. Say yes to Jessica," like that cutting any rebuttal off as Rosalie, Alice, and Bella come up to us and he used this as an escape, I was too rude.
Alice spoke, "He will be okay, no worries,"
I had been I should haven't been so brass.
"Good, rejection hurts,"
School, I reach it at 7:30 am and enter my classroom. I see faces; weird, grumpy, some angry, some happy, some sad and so on. I go and grab my seat at the end of the row and then march towards my own seat either with Bella or whoever I might be sitting with like Angela. My usual day is just a mix of boring and interesting. Ms. Rohini Solomon, she's a Christian. She's a brilliant teacher and strict as hell. But then more classes with less brilliant teachers come, but right now my eyes are on the clock.
Lunch which is an okay, forty minutes long, now Theo with his arm around Bella walk with me since we have a good number of classes together. He holds all three backpacks like they weight nothing and to him its like lifting a goose feather. I feel like gaging seeing the way they gaze at each other thinking no one can see it. The cafeteria is filling up as we collect an empty red plastic tray, a fruit punch Snapple, chips, brownie, and a slice of pizza since I was not eating a sandwich not knowing if it is any good.
Theo smiled this perfect smile, maybe when he was human it would have been more crooked. "You're not going to the dance?"
"No, I honestly don't want to but still going with Bella, Angela, and that annoying girl to look for their dresses,"
Bella chimed in, "Jessica,"
I retorted, "A common name, for a common girl," she just annoyed me but if she was good to Bella that was all that mattered. Rose smiled, "Parts came,"
"See this girl knows a good time, Alice what about the outright perfect interior?"
She had to tear her eyes from Jasper's, it must have taken some effort because he was very good looking to me, more so than Emmett. "By Monday, they made it special for her truck," then she continued to gaze at her mate, and deep down it hit me I wanted that even with a human. , not blood related to love me flaws and all.
Edward spoke, "Where are you looking for dresses?"
Bella answered, his eyes gazed into mine, pretty sure the question was directed at me. "Port Angeles," but she was also absorbed in Theo, to her he was the moon never could she soak up enough of him.
The next two days are sunny, and that meant no Cullens.
I wore some jeans and a flattering black crop top designed with a cinched square neckline with adjustable ties, loose sleeves with cinched cuffs and smocked ultra crop hem. Black ankle boots and some jewelry, I was happy with the sun but seems Bella hated it now.
Angela was in the back seat of my car when Bella and her friend Jessica make their way to my waiting car. "Hey, don't let her mouth dictate what you buy today. Some girls need to un-screw other females light to make them shine brighter," she gave me a grateful look but stays silent.
"Finally," muttering as Jessica gets in back with Bella in front. My excitement increased exponentially as we actually drove out of the town limits just to have a little fun. My Mustang took to the road with my foot to the floor, music blared it was such a diverse mix from classical to rock, every era played no reason not to help culture them.
I asked, "Theo, by all means, will show up after sundown," she knew by the smile that brightened her pale face. "I am hoping,"
Maybe I was just a bitch, but their chatter was so dull. Talking about Tyler and his delusions of taking me to prom, and that being the reason some girl named Lauran was not my fan. I sighed, "He isn't my type, and whoever this Lauran girl is can go-" Bella held her hand over my mouth.
"Calm down, I already told Angela and Jess it wasn't true,"
Rolling my eyes pawing at the lack of dresses, seems my real shopping will be in Seattle still. The dress selection wasn't large, but both of them found a few things to try on. Bella and I, sat on a low chair just inside the dressing room, by the three-way mirror, trying to control my fuming.
Jessica walked out and in my head, it screamed NOOO.
I commented, "It doesn't flatter you, it makes you look homely," hoping she didn't get huffy, it was the truth and why we were here to lend some truth on them. She walked back into the room to try on another.
"Not like I was being rude, Bells," but she smiled shaking her long brown hair.
Jess was torn between two — one a long, strapless, basic black number, the other a knee-length electric blue with spaghetti straps. I encouraged her to go with the blue; why not play up the eyes?
Bella was good at compliments as I gave the harsh truth if they looked bad. Angela came out in a pale pink. "perfect, it drapes around your tall frame perfectly, it even brings out the honeyed tints in your hair," she blushed but was super happy.
I yawned, "Bella you're coming with me we can meet them for dinner at the Italian place on the boardwalk,"
"Coming," knowing full well she was bored and found this as mundane as myself. I never came to Port Angeles even as a child, so hope Bella knew the way.
Together we meandered through the streets, which were filling up with end-of-the-workday traffic, and hoped we're headed toward downtown. I wasn't paying as much attention as I should to where I was going since my feet followed Bella. I was trying so hard not to think about him, damn it, Edward. When I looked up to see someone's silver Volvo parked along the street and it all came crashing down on me. Stupid, unreliable vampire, I thought to myself.
I stomped alongside Bella who was talking about Theo and his lack of wanting her to be a soulless beast, walking in a southerly direction, toward some glass-fronted shops that looked promising. But when we got to them, they were just a repair shop and a vacant space.
I growled, "Theo, just assumes they have no soul. A soul is not a human thing, some humans have no soul, it matters not what you're but how you're. I will turn you myself if he makes a mistake and has you stay human, you're able to make the choice and he should respect it no matter his personal theory," my tone more frustrated and angry, she was to be protected and by being turned her human body would be gone and in much less danger.
The stress spread through my mind like ink on paper. I took in a deep, ragged breath before placing my hands, enclosed together speaking again in a normal tone, "you've gotten us lost haven't you?" a small smile playing on my lips.
She groaned, "Yes,"
Now a group of four boys turned around the corner we seemed to be heading for, dressed too casually to be heading home from the office, but they were too grimy to be tourists. As they approached us I realized they weren't too many years older than we are. They were joking loudly among themselves, laughing raucously and punching each other's arms how childish. I scooted Bella as far to the inside of the sidewalk as I could to give them room and keep her at a safer distance from the walking proof of what drugs did to the pregnant woman, walking swiftly, looking past them to the corner.
"Hey, there!" one of them called as they passed, and he had to be talking to us since no one else was
around. We both glanced up automatically. Two of them had paused, the other two were slowing. The closest, a heavyset, dark-haired man in his early twenties, seemed to be the one who had spoken. He was wearing a flannel shirt open over a dirty t-shirt, cut-off jeans, and sandals. He took half a step toward us, a very wrong move.
I gave him a withering gaze, "Not interested, get bent fucktard," Bella was the sweet one, I was not having been raised like I was would never be allowed.
I grabbed her arm making her feet go faster as we walked faster toward the corner. I could hear them laughing at full volume behind us, they have been drinking or are…
"Hey, wait!" one of them called after us again, I raised my middle finger keeping Bella in my grasp. I spoke low, "If anything happens, you run and for the love of god don't trip. I can take care of myself, trust me that I can, but with you in harm's way it would be a distraction," I felt it two of them are here, I guessed Theo and Edward.
I sighed, "Theo is here but I can't tell how close, so when you haul that skinny butt scream his name," she knew how my training went and how my powers worked, her swirling brown eyes looked into mine, she understood.
"But,"
"No buts, haul ass,"
All the confirmation I was given was a head nod when we found ourselves on a sidewalk leading past the backs of several somber-colored warehouses, each with
large bay doors for unloading trucks, padlocked for the night. The south side of the street had no sidewalk, only a chain-link fence topped with barbed wire protecting some kind of engine parts storage yard. "This is the very last time I follow you around town," trying to play it off with humor, she did give a halfhearted smile. We'd wandered far past the part of Port Angeles that I, as a guest, was intended to see. It was getting darker now, I realized, the clouds finally returning, piling up on the western horizon, creating an early sunset. My clothes not very warm.
The eastern sky was still clear, but graying, shot through with streaks of pink and orange. I'd left my jacket in the car, and a sudden shiver made me cross my arms tightly across my chest. A single van passed me, and then the road was empty.
The sky suddenly darkened further, and, as I looked over my shoulder to glare at the offending cloud, I realized with a shock that two men were walking quietly twenty feet behind us.
They were from the same group we originally passed at the corner, though neither was the dark one who'd spoken to us. I turned my head forward at once, quickening my pace. A chill that had nothing to do with the weather made me shiver again. "We're being herded, Bella. Stop shaking you're safe with me," but pain shot in me as my powers reacted to the danger walking behind and somewhere in front of us.
As a human, it hurts to use the power, but the pain fades.
I stopped looking around, they would come from all sides keeping us enclosed she wouldn't be able to run fast enough. "Come on, Bells," pulling her faster. Because lounging against the western building, midway down the street, were the other two men from the group, both watching with excited smiles as she froze dead on the sidewalk. I realized then she be no use, Theo gave her protection where I had to learn it very young.
I paused for only a second, but it felt like a very long time. I turned then and darted to the other side of the road where there was an alcove to shove her ass. I had a sinking feeling that it was a wasted attempt. The footsteps behind me were louder now.
"There you are!" The booming voice of the stocky, dark-haired man shattered the intense quiet and made me angry.
"Yeah," a voice called loudly from behind me, making me jump again as I tried to hurry down the street.
"We just took a little detour."
Our steps had to slow now. I was closing the distance between myself and the lounging pair too quickly. I sighed placing her back, "Don't fucking move, Bella,"
"You're eyes,"
I was still much closer to the two behind us, my goal was to take them out but not have them all rush me either. "I wouldn't suggest you assholes come any closer," they did stop, but to show them I was not to be trifled with, I moved my hand clamping down on a kid maybe a year older than myself and slamming him hard into the ground.
His friend backed up.
"Don't be like that, sugar," he called, and the raucous laughter started again but this time it was more forced, only the stocky, dark-haired man seemed game to keep it up, the rest followed his lead.
When it comes to the fight there's no honor, no code. All that matters is the win and we take nothing for granted. I sighed my fist slamming into the face of the last one behind me, thank you, Felix, for your service and training. It's been there a while now, this anger, escaping when I'm away from those I love. I'm angry at store clerks and car drivers, heck, I'm even angry if my sandwich isn't quite right. But the truth is, my life needs changing for the better because there's more going into this brain and body than I can handle and still be me.
In that frozen second between standoff and fighting, I see their eyes flick from me to the ones on the floor. Our faces are unreadable, no fear, no invitational smirk. I am banking on them making the mistake I predicted they would. Bella was safe behind me, they wouldn't make it to her, but like that my stance changed and the power vanished, they arrived and my secreted remained just that.
Headlights suddenly flew around the corner, the car almost hitting the stocky one, forcing him to jump back toward the sidewalk. But the silver car unexpectedly fishtailed around, skidding to a stop with the passenger door open just a few feet from me.
Theo and Edward came from the Volvo of doom, "Get in," a furious voice commanded, it was Edward and he was not happy. I just helped Bella into the back slamming the door before watching the two let the vampire come out sending the rest running in fear.
I was in and my seat belt buckled, amazing how suddenly the feeling of
security washed over me — even before I was off the street — as soon as I heard his voice.
It was dark in the car, no light had come on with the opening of the door, and I could barely see his face in the glow from the dashboard. The tires squealed as he spun around to face north, accelerating. I sighed for the millionth time it felt like, "Bella, you okay. Sorry if I scared you,"
She stammered, "How did you learn to fight?"
I winked, "School,"
He took a sharp left, racing forward, blowing through several stop signs without a pause.
But I felt utterly safe and, for the moment, totally unconcerned about where we were going. I stared at his face in profound relief, relief that went beyond my sudden deliverance. I studied his flawless features in the limited light, waiting for my breath to return to normal until it occurred to me that his expression was murderously angry.
"Are you okay?" I asked, surprised at how my voice sounded.
"No," he said curtly, and his tone was livid.
I sat in silence, watching his face while his blazing eyes stared straight ahead until the car came to a sudden stop. I glanced around, but it was too dark to see anything besides the vague outline of dark trees crowding the roadside. We weren't in town anymore.
"Caprice?" he asked, his voice tight, controlled.
"Yes?" My voice was still rough. I tried to clear my throat quietly, hearing Bella and Theo whispering in the back, but we all heard every word.
"Are you all right?" He still didn't look at me, but the fury was plain on his face.
"Yes," my words soft.
"Distract me, please," he ordered.
"I'm sorry, what?" how?
He exhaled sharply. "Just prattle about something unimportant until I calm down," he clarified, closing his eyes and pinching
the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger.
"Um." I wracked my brain for something trivial that wouldn't embarrass Bella. "I'm going to run over Tyler Crowley tomorrow before school?"
He was still squeezing his eyes closed, but the corner of his mouth twitched.
"Why?"
"He's telling everyone that he's taking me to prom- he seems very misguided maybe my fist un-hinged some part of his brain,"
"I heard about that." He sounded a bit more composed.
"You did?" I asked in disbelief, my previous irritation flaring. "If he's paralyzed from the neck down, he can't go to the prom, either," I muttered, refining my plan.
Edward sighed, and finally opened his eyes.
"Better?"
"Not really."
I waited, but he didn't speak again. He leaned his head back against the seat, staring at the ceiling of the car. His face was rigid. I glanced back seeing Bella her face smashed into Theo's hard chest, he gave me a nod.
"What's wrong?" My voice echoed.
"Sometimes I have a problem with my temper, Caprice." He was whispering, too, and as he stared out the window, his eyes narrowed into slits. "But it wouldn't be helpful for me to turn around and hunt down those…" He didn't finish his sentence, looking away, struggling for a moment to control his anger again.
"At least," he continued, "that's what I'm trying to convince myself."
I retorted, "I would have never guessed you had any temperamental issues,"
Theo chuckled and, in the end, so did Edward. He finally dove away heading to the boardwalk. "Yea should tell the girls where we have been,"
Seems they ate without us but now we four sit together as Bella as some mushroom ravioli, and myself some shrimp alfredo with the waitress about to scribble her number in some random condiment on his own food.
I finished my food placing the napkin in the bowl, "You really shouldn't do that to people," I criticized. "It's hardly fair."
"Do what?"
"Dazzle them like that — she's probably hyperventilating in the kitchen right now." She was as she wrote her number on the check, I swear…girls…
He seemed confused.
"Oh, come on," I said dubiously. "You have to know the effect you have on people."
He tilted his head to one side, and his eyes were curious. "I dazzle people?"
"You haven't noticed? Do you think everybody gets their way so easily?"
Theo smiled, "He does," I gave Theo a nod, gesturing to him as Edward just ignored his brother.
He ignored my questions. "Do I dazzle you?"
I stood bolt upright, my hand in the air. "CHECK PLEASE," this simple reaction, it sent Bella into a fit of laughter but hearing it was music as Theo held her closer laughing too.
"Don't you have a jacket?" His voice was disapproving.
"Yes." I looked at the empty bench next to me. "Oh — I left it in my car," I realized.
Edward was shrugging out of his jacket. I suddenly realized that I had never once noticed what he was wearing — not just tonight, but ever. I just couldn't seem to look away from his face. I made myself look now, focusing. He was removing a light beige leather jacket now; underneath he wore an ivory turtleneck sweater. It fit him snugly, emphasizing how muscular his chest was.
He handed me the jacket, interrupting my ogling.
"Thanks," I said again, sliding my arms into his jacket. It was cold — the way my jacket felt when I first picked it up in the morning, hanging in the drafty hallway. I shivered again. It smelled amazing. I inhaled, trying to identify the delicious scent. It didn't smell like cologne. The sleeves were much too long; I shoved them back so I could free my hands.
"That color of black looks lovely with your skin," he said, watching me. I was surprised; I looked down, flushing, of course.
"Thanks,"
I gave Bella a look, "Are you ready, I am driving us home,"
Theo was looking at Edward, my guess was Edward was reading his thoughts.
After another ten minutes, I was driving off with my cousin.
"Bella, I am in trouble,"
She guessed my inner thoughts, "He is your mate,"
A simple word brought my world crashing down around me. "Yes,"