Chapter six! Hope you enjoy!

Chapter 6: The Weight

She started at the sloppy Full Windsor knot with dismay; how come all the men in her life didn't know how to tie a tie, but she did? Well, to be fair, his collarbone was still broken and his arm was still in a sling. She undid the knot and began to retie it. Over, under, over, under, up, down, over, under and through. Ally adjusted the knot, deep in thought.

He'd shown up this morning as if nothing were wrong between them and made no mention of where he'd been the past two days. He'd just shown up at the Music Factory, ready to get dressed and head off to prom. In one rough motion, she tightened the knot, driving her fist right into Austin's Adam's apple. He gagged. She looked up, quickly removing her hand from his neck.

...I just punched Austin in the throat. She froze.

"Oh! I'm so sorry." He loosened the tie and raised an eyebrow. "I... I didn't mean that." She stared at her feet. He scoffed in amusement, rubbing at his neck. She sighed, "I'm going to go finish getting ready." Ally scurried away, leaving the practice room to continue getting ready in the upstairs bathroom. She glanced over the railing, catching a glimpse of Carrie and Dez.

Dez's suit jacket was rainbow houndstooth, his shirt was white and his pants were black. Carrie's dress was absolutely gorgeous. A light pink, two piece dress that showed off her tiny midriff. The top was intricate and lacy and the skirt rested at mid-thigh. She looked absolutely stunning - Ally had to admit, she was a little envious.

Carrie looked perfect. Ally shuffled into the bathroom and shut the door. The dark circles under her eyes told stories of sleepless nights and stress. She touched up her foundation and successfully hid her tired complexion. She took a few steps back and stared at her reflection, studying herself carefully. What was going to happen to her once she started to show? Just how much weight would she gain? She didn't want to think about it, but her mind continued to dwell. She made the finishing touches to her hair and makeup before examining her dress. She fished around in her purse, fingers finally falling upon a familiar plastic stick.

The test. She took it and waited for the results to appear. Positive, just like all the others she'd taken. She lost herself in her thoughts, losing track of just how long she'd been in the bathroom. A knock broke her from her thoughts.

"Ally?" It was Austin. How was she going to tell him? She trembled, wondering if she could even muster the courage to tell him tonight. What if this was bad news to him? He didn't take bad news well. Worse yet, what would Jimmy Starr think? Would this news prolong Austin's punishment? What if he could never perform again? It would kill him! "Ally? Are you okay in there?"

"Y-yeah!" Ally replied, tears in her eyes. "Just... hold on, I'm finishing up my makeup." With a tissue, she dabbed away her tears, trying hard not to smudge up her makeup. Ally took a deep breath in an attempt to banish her negative thoughts. When she opened the door to face him, he smiled at her.

"You look beautiful," he said, handing her the corsage he'd bought. "I, uh, I got this for you." Lilies and orchids, her favorite. He remembered. "...I love you, Ally." She smiled down at them, tears welling in her eyes. Would he still love her after tonight? Another deep breath saw her willing away her tears and smiling back at him.

"Thank you, Austin, it's beautiful." He felt awful; Dez had picked out that corsage. He'd been too sick to look for corsages, call about limo rental or even pick out his own tuxedo. Dez had done it all and Austin was unbelievably grateful; Austin wouldn't have been able to forgive himself if he'd ruined Ally's prom. She grabbed his left hand, "We should go downstairs, everyone is waiting for us." They walked downstairs only to find the Music Factory completely empty. Ally's phone chirped. "...A message from Trish... Got sick of waiting, left without you. Great." Ally's supposed that this was Trish's not-so-subtle way of telling her she needed to tell Austin before Trish exploded from keeping the secret. She glanced up at Austin. "I'm guessing you're not up to walking there, right?"

"I'll call us a cab or something, okay? Just give me a minute to look up a number." She watched him fiddle with his phone. Her palms began to sweat. "Yeah, we're over at the Mall of Miami in the A&A Music Factory. Oh yeah, that's right. Yeah, I'm Austin Moon. Thanks. See you soon." He hung up and slipped his phone into his pocket. Ally was fidgety; what were they supposed to do in the meantime? "Hey, you okay?" She nodded and dropped her gaze. She wasn't okay at all. She was exhausted, nauseous, sore and, thanks to Trish, alone with the source of her current anxieties. "You sure? You don't look so good."

"I'm fine!" she snapped, "I'm just frustrated that they left without us. I just wanted tonight to be perfect, but then Carrie looked so beautiful and I got to thinking, what if I'm not that beautiful?" Tears stung at the back of her eyes, "What's going to happen to me, Austin? Or my career?" Austin grabbed her shoulder with his left hand.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Ally, what are you talking about?" She paused, stalling for time. "Please. What has you so upset?" Before she could answer, Austin's phone rang. The cab had arrived. He grabbed her hand, trying to keep her from bolting. "Ally, you know you can tell me anything." He felt like such a hypocrite. She tugged her hand from his.

"...we should go."

Ally couldn't believe Trish and Dez had actually left them behind. She glared daggers at them from across the gymnasium. All she wanted was for this night to be fun. Actual fun, not the fun she was pretending to have now. One carefree night before her life changed. One carefree night before she lost Austin to her secret.

Austin stared at her, completely aware she was putting up a false front. He stood, holding out his hand. "You look bored, do you want to dance?" He led her to the dance floor and put his arm on her shoulder. They swayed back and forth to the slow music.

A few songs passed and a dread came over him. He was itching. It was driving him crazy, absolutely crazy. He'd been trying his hardest to keep it together, even if it was only for this night. He smiled down at her, hoping she wouldn't notice his skin twitching from the insatiable itch. She met his gaze, big brown eyes blinking back tears. "...Ally?" She shook her head. They sat down at the empty table.

"I'm sorry, it's not you." It wasn't him. It was her, her secret and the way the night had gone. It was their careers. It was Ronnie Ramone and Jimmy Starr. Especially Jimmy Starr. It was her father, her mother. "I'm sorry, Austin. There's just something that's been on my mind for a while and it's been bugging me tonight. I've been trying to push it to the back of my mind. There's something I need to tell you, but not here. I'll tell you after prom."

"...You can't tell me now?" She shook her head. "Is it good news or bad news? Judging by how upset you are, I'm guessing it's bad."

"I'm sorry, Austin," she repeated, blinking back her tears, "I'm not sure if it's good news or bad news."

"No matter what kind of news it is, you don't have to apologize." He paused, glancing around. "Do you want to leave? This secret of yours is keeping you from having any fun. Let's ditch this place and head back to the factory." He stood, reaching out for her hand. She took it and stood, feeling her phone vibrate in her purse. Ally let it ring, figuring it was Trish calling to either apologize or rush her into spilling her secret. She followed Austin into the hallway and out the door. She inhaled deeply as he squeezed her hand.

Everything would be okay.

They'd been sitting on the couch in the practice room for a while, both had changed out of their prom attire and into their practice sweats. He'd told her to tell him her secret when she was ready, but she wasn't sure she would ever be ready. Minutes passed as the awkward silence that hung over them became near unbearable. Ally stood and walked across the room. He went to follow her. She turned on her heel.

"All-"

"I'm pregnant," she interrupted, watching the words visibly stun him.

"What?"

"Whaaaaaaaaat? Who said that?" She gave a nervous laugh and began to chew her hair.

"...what?" She sighed, voice hesitant and shaking as she continued.

"...Baby Moon is due in January." He stared at her, brown eyes wide. He kept silent, averting his eyes to the floor. Lips slightly parted, he began desperately searching for words. She stared at him, waiting for some reaction other than shock to cross his face. Trembles coursed through her entire body as she watched him stare blankly back at her, unable to articulate any form of a response. She couldn't take it anymore.

"Austin? Please, say something," she begged, walking across the room, into his arms. Say anything." He looked at her, eyes still wide with shock. He stumbled over words, his breaths coming out in short huffs as he tried to form sentences. He shook his head, managing to spit out a silent I love you. He tightened his grip on her as she buried her face into his chest, hugging her with all the strength in his left arm. "I'm going to lose you now, aren't I?" He could feel her tears seep through his shirt as he tried to process what she'd told him.

"Lose me?" He choked on the painful lump in his throat. "Ally, no... lose me? Never." He laughed, tears falling. "This? This fantastic." She shook her head. Austin grabbed her shoulder, held her at arms-length and looked her over. "It is though." The most beautiful smile Ally had ever seen crossed his face. "I will stand by you no matter what; I'm yours forever. We would have wanted a family together in the future, right? We just have it a little earlier than expected." She hugged him, burying her face into his chest again.

"My dad is going to kill you." He led them back to the couch. "What about Jimmy? He still hasn't lifted your performance ban. With this news, he might not ever lift it. He's going to tell us we're too young. We're setting a bad example. Ronnie won't be too happy either. He planned on sending me on tour during the summer. How are we going to t-" Austin shushed her.

"Hey, we got this, okay? Here's how we'll tell them: loud and proud. Yeah, your parents aren't going to be happy about it and yeah, they might hate me for it, but you know what? They'll get over it. They'll warm up the the idea and forget why they were even angry in the first place." He held her tight, trying to quell his own fears. His parents would be furious with him. He'd be grounded without allowance and his punishment would be to work in the mattress store.

He wished he could talk to them. When their anger dissipated, they would have supported him no matter what. The wound still fresh, his heart ached. All he wanted was their advice right now.

He banished his thoughts; Ally needed him to be her rock right now. He laughed, ignoring the pain in his throat. "Baby Moon is going to be the cutest little pancake in Miami." Ally laughed in spite of herself.

"...you just called our baby a pancake." He tried desperately to swallow the lump in his throat, but his mouth was dry. It hurt to talk. The news had come as a shock; he was a little woozy, but he wouldn't let Ally down. He had to keep everything - his fear, the itch, the urge and the shaking - under control.

"You'd prefer I call him...? Uh, her...? Them. You'd prefer I call them a pickle? That's your nickname." He paused. "How long have you known?"

"Only about a week. Trish has been foaming at the mouth. She told Dez and we've been scared that he was going to let it slip to you. I'm pretty sure he told Carrie tonight at prom. I'm sorry that I didn't tell you sooner, I was so scared that I was going to lose you." Before he could answer, Trish, Dez and Carrie came into the practice room.

"Congrats, buddy!" Dez shouted with a grin. Austin was almost at his limit. He needed his drugs, and fast. But he had to play along, he had to ignore his habit to avoid airing his own dark secret to the group. He looked to Ally, winked, then looked back to Dez. A confused look came across his face.

"...what do you mean? Congrats about what?" Dez's expression dropped and Trish elbowed him in the side. "...I'm just kidding! Thanks." Behind his smile, Austin felt positively sick. Ally had made some decent points. Without performing or recording, how was he supposed to provide for Ally or their baby?

...would he have to work at Moon's Mattress Kingdom? The thought made him sick. Actually, no. The distinct lack of drugs in your system is making you feel sick.

It felt like someone was trying to rip his arm off at the shoulder and the itch was damn near overwhelming. He began to sweat, his stomach was doing flips, and his head was throbbing. There was a half a pill in his pocket.

How can you gracefully bow out to take it?

"I'll be right back."

Yeah, real graceful. He stood and tried to exit the room as calmly as he could. He locked himself in the bathroom and fished the long covered pill from his pocket. With his credit card, he smashed up the pill on the counter. He stared down at the mess of dust on the counter, dropped the card and closed his eyes. He brought his hand up to his face. He grimaced hard, feeling shame and self loathing hit him in the stomach like a lead weight. What was he doing? Austin hated himself for being unable to resist. Quietly, a bitter chuckle left his lips, tears falling down his cheeks. He stared daggers at his own reflection. His parents would be ashamed. Here he was a teenage father-to-be with an addiction to opiates.

How could you ever call yourself someone's father? He was... sick. He needed help. You're a drug-addict. How could he be both?

I can't be both. Can I?

No. You can't even be yourself on these drugs. You have to stop using if you want to be a father.

The high hit him and he finally felt calm. He felt happy and complete. He and Ally were going to be parents in January and nothing could tear him down. When Jimmy heard their news, there was no way he'd be able to keep him from performing anymore; it wouldn't be in good conscience. He burst back into the practice room with a drug induced exuberance. Ignoring the strange glances from his friends, he boisterously and vehemently demanded to celebrate by dining out at Ally's favorite restaurant. They each exchanged glances and chalked up his strange behavior to nerves from finding out about Baby Moon.

Austin caught Ally staring at him out of the corner of his eye. He turned to her and grinned.

"I love you, Ally." He put his arm around her and they walked down the stairs and started out the front door. As they walked, someone caught his eye. A man stood in the middle of the empty parking lot. Red hoodie and jeans, hood up, hands pocketed. He was wearing Moonwalkers.

He stopped, staring at the stationary figure standing in the streetlight. Austin walked toward him, ignoring the call of his friends. As he got closer, goosebumps began to form on his chilly skin. The figure looked up and smiled.

You know you're not fooling anyone. Austin froze in his spot. He stared. He felt Ally pull at his left hand.

"Austin, what's wrong? Why did you come over here?" He searched for words in a panic.

"...I thought I saw something over here." He replied. The figure gave a dark chuckle.

You "thought"?

He was face to face with himself.

This chapter's song is The Weight by Thrice. :) (Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays!)