Chapter 5
"Sorry Doesn't Change Anything"
Steve and Danny stepped out of the elevator onto the freshly waxed floor of the hospital's third level and made their way toward Paul Keller's room.
Steve had been avoiding this interrogation since receiving the videos of Keller's meetings with Wo Fat. The thought of being in the same room as Keller, never mind questioning him, made Steve livid, but he needed to be present; he needed to hear everything for himself.
They turned right at the nurses' station and Danny was nearly flattened with the housekeeper's cleaning cart.
"Oh, pardon me!" she called out in a flustered voice as she maneuvered her cart around them.
Danny gave his partner an incredulous look. "That woman almost ran me over because she was too busy gaping at you!"
"You're seeing things, Danno," Steve replied.
"Yeah, things you obviously don't!"
"Do I need to remind you I'm engaged?"
"What was your excuse before that?"
Steve furrowed his brow and glanced at his partner. "Are you saying I don't notice things?"
Danny ended the conversation with a wave of his hand.
As they approached the ex-CIA agent's room they witnessed an unwelcome sight. "Hey," Danny said, tapping Steve's arm with the back of his hand, "what's Lynch doing coming out of Keller's room?"
Steve's groan, although barely audible, caused Danny some trepidation; he did not want a confrontation to break out between the two men in the hallway of the hospital.
Lynch sauntered up to them. "As much as I'd love to chat, I have places to be and people to harass."
"What are you doing here?" Steve demanded.
"Even if I could tell you, I wouldn't," he smirked. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have an appointment and she won't be kept waiting." He walked away without another word.
Danny shook his head in sympathy. "I pity the woman." Steve ignored the comment and turned to enter Keller's room, but Danny stopped him. "Are you sure about going in there?" he asked.
"Yeah," Steve replied, "I'll be fine." Nodding to the police officer on duty he pushed open the door and went in.
Paul Keller sat propped up on his pillows with one wrist handcuffed to the bed railing and the other holding a copy of the Wall Street Journal.
Without looking up from his reading material he asked, "Did you find that massage therapist, yet? I can't tell you what sitting in bed all day does to a man's muscles." When no reply came he lifted his head to find the Commander of 5-0 staring down at him with an unyielding expression and his short, less menacing partner looking on. "You're not Dixie," Keller said, and adding with mock concern, he continued, "What did you do with her?"
"What is it with you CIA people and sarcasm?" Danny wondered.
"I never use sarcasm." Keller responded with such a sincere tone that if Danny did not know better he would have believed him. Concentrating on Steve, Keller continued, "Has Seal Man come to torture me for information? I was wondering when you would get around to visiting me." He noticed a large envelope in Steve's hand. "And you brought a card. I'm touched."
"Shut up and listen," Steve ordered. He pulled out a photo from the envelope and showed it to Keller. "What can you tell us about this picture?"
"I seem to have lost my glasses," Keller said, searching his bed with his free hand. "I'm afraid I can't see anything without them."
"Except, of course, the Wall Street Journal," Danny said, gesturing toward the paper resting on the man's lap.
"You're a regular Sherlock Holmes, aren't you?" Keller scowled as he abandoned his search and snatched the photo from Steve's hand. There were two men in the picture, one was him and the other was Wo Fat, but he would never readily admit that to anyone.
"Well?" Steve said, his lack of patience making him testy.
"These two men...are they wanted by the law?"
Steve glanced away to his left for a moment trying to control his anger. "Do you know who's in the picture or not?"
"Yes, I'm afraid I do," Keller confessed, a look of contrition spreading over his face. "And I'm no longer ashamed to admit it. This man here," he said pointing to himself, "that is," he took a dramatic pause, "my…evil twin brother, Saul Keller. You didn't know about him did you?" he finished with a smile.
Steve reacted instantly by lunging forward, with the idea to grab Keller and shake the information out of him, but Danny jumped in between the two men exclaiming, "Whoa! Steve!" Then he added in a more subdued tone, "He is trying to make you angry, you're only fueling his fire if you react like this. He can't get out of bed and try to pulverize you, so he's doing it with his words."
"Is there a problem, gentleman?" Keller asked, unfazed by Steve's reaction.
Steve closed his eyes for a moment, willing back his frustration and ire. He wanted to beat Keller into a bloody pulp, but he knew that would accomplish nothing. He diverted his eyes away from the reason for his anger and looked out the window, trying to focus on why he was there.
Danny turned around to face Keller. With a forced smile and his hands emphasizing his words, he said, "We know that you are in the picture and we know who the other man is. In fact, we have video clips of the two of you conversing on four different occasions. What we want to know is what the hell you were doing with this man, and if you continue with your sarcasm I will unleash my partner and look the other way while he gets the information from you his way."
"So, you're saying you need my help," Keller stated, undisturbed by the threat from the vertically challenged detective.
"If it makes you feel better to put it that way, then, yes."
Keller nodded his head. "I'll tell you what you want to know."
"That's excellent," Danny smiled.
"For a price," Keller proposed, extending his free hand.
"I don't think you are in any position to bargain," Danny informed him.
A sly smile spread across Keller's face. "As long as I have the information you want, I think I am in the perfect position to bargain."
"Okay, what is it you want?" Danny inquired. "A few years shaved off your life sentence?"
"I'm not worried about being in prison for life."
"What do you want?" Steve demanded.
A serious expression covered Keller's face and he spoke without a trace of sarcasm. "I want to see my daughter."
"No way!" Steve answered fiercely. "Not happening, ever!"
"Then say goodbye to that information," Keller said coolly, lifting the newspaper to continue his reading.
"I can't believe you would dare ask to see her after what you put her through!" Steve growled as he ripped the newspaper from Keller's hand and threw it across the room.
"I dare because she is my daughter," Keller snarled.
The two men stared vehemently at each other and the tension filling the room electrically charged the air around them. Danny held his breath. He knew if he said anything it might worsen the already volatile situation, but if he said nothing, things would definitely get worse. It was a risk he would have to take.
"I think we're done here," Danny announced. When his partner made no attempt to leave he added, "Steve, let's go."
Just when Steve appeared to be leaving, Keller threw in one last jab. "I hear your little brother is in Hawaii. Make sure you tell him the Islands can be a dangerous place."
Steve snapped. "What did you just say?" he said in a threatening tone.
"You heard me, McGarrett."
"You son of a-"
Steve's words were lost in the sound of the charge nurse storming into the room. "What are you doing to my patient?" she bellowed, shoving her way to the side of Keller's bed to protect him. Her red hair matched her fiery presence. She was not about to put up with any shenanigans on her floor. "I will not tolerate mistreatment of people in my care, no matter who they are or what they have done." Her smoke grey eyes challenged the tall dark haired man with the intense blue eyes.
Jaw and fists clenched, Steve took a deep breath. "Ma'am, you're interrupting a police investigation-"
"This is a hospital room," she said firmly, wagging her finger in his face, "not an interrogation room! I want the two of you out, now." Her finger pointed toward the door.
Steve was determined not to be ordered about by the nurse and he stood riveted to the floor.
"Steve, we're done here," Danny insisted. "You're not going to accomplish anything this way."
Steve hated it when Danny was right. He swallowed the intense emotions that were threatening to choke him. He glowered at Keller, promising him, "If anything happens to my brother, you'll be hearing from me."
* * * * * * H50 * * * * * *
"I can't believe he's using Natalie to try and get what he wants!" Steve yelled, slamming his fist against the door of his truck, not for the first time. "Why did I even think we were going to get anything out of him!" For a man who usually kept his emotions close to home, this display was like the grand finale of a Fourth of July fireworks production.
Danny remembered how Steve acted when Mary was kidnapped, but this was different. This was a whole new level. Although, Danny understood his partner's need to express his anger, he was beginning to feel unsafe in the passenger's seat with Steve at the wheel.
"Please, either drive safely or pull over and finish your tirade," Danny pleaded. "We've already been in one accident this week." Steve silenced himself and gripped the steering wheel until his knuckles turned white and he looked like he was about to explode. Danny put a hand over his face. "Maybe it wasn't such a good idea that you went to question Keller."
"What gives you that idea, Sherlock?"
"Hey! You don't need to get nasty with me!" Danny blasted him. "I'm your friend, remember?"
"I didn't ask you to come," Steve fired back.
Danny snorted. "I'm going to ignore that comment because I know you're not your usual cheerful self. And furthermore, I don't think I need to tell you that if you allow your anger to get the best of you it's going to take you on a one way trip down a dark and scary road, and the people you care about won't recognize you as the same Steve McGarrett they know and love."
"Come on, Danny," Steve said, "that guy uses Natalie, his own daughter, as a pawn for his gain. He ruined Alex's life and…" Steve bit back the remainder of his words and ran a frustrated hand through his hair.
Danny studied him for a moment, his eyes narrowed in concentration. "What do you mean he ruined Alex's life?" As far as he knew Alex was doing fine. At least that is what Steve had told him and what he had observed the times he himself had been in her company.
Steve flattened himself against the back of his seat and pressed his lips together.
"Steve, what happened?" Danny asked, concern coloring his tone. He knew whatever nightmare had befallen Alex four years ago had scarred the couple deeply, whether or not they would admit it.
Stopping at a traffic light, Steve rubbed his thumb and index finger over his eyes; blinking several times afterward. He focused on the street before him. Taking a left turn, he headed out of the city along a road that paralleled the ocean.
The two friends listened to the rhythm of the vehicle as they sped forward, the miles slipping away under the tires. After twenty minutes, the Silverado came to a stop on a large patch of dirt that hedged the road. Steve cut the engine and climbed out of the truck.
Danny watched his partner cross in front of him and stand facing the sparkling blue water. Opening his door, Danny stepped down and joined him. He waited, knowing Steve would tell him when he was ready. He would finish the story, filling in the details about Alex.
Danny glanced up at the man he trusted with his life. He knew Steve gathered strength from being near the ocean. He wondered sometimes if the SEAL had salt water coursing through his veins. Despite the mood he smiled at that thought.
Sensing that Danny waited for him to answer the question about Alex, Steve drew in a deep breath. "I told you Alex was attacked with a knife," Steve said.
"Yeah, you did," Danny assured him.
"What I didn't tell you was what it did to her." Steve paused and Danny allowed him the time he needed to finish the story. "She can't have kids," he said quietly. "That's why she broke it off with me four years ago."
Danny exhaled, not realizing he was holding his breath. For once Danny Williams had no words. Both men stood in silence, scanning the horizon as they contemplated the idea of no children and what it meant to each of them.
"I know saying 'sorry' doesn't change anything, but I am," Danny offered.
Steve nodded his head in reply. The word "sorry" never really fixed anything. It only bandaged a wound that over time one hoped would heal. But even if Keller himself said that he was genuinely "sorry" for all the damage he had caused, it would be a great feat indeed to overcome the pain and loss he had imposed upon them.
"I can't imagine not having a child with the woman I loved," Danny admitted.
Steve knew he loved Alex and wanted nothing more than to marry her, but he was still wrestling with the inevitable fact of not having a child with her and what it really meant. He had heard what she felt about it and what she imagined he would suffer because she could not give him children, but he was still not sure he would ever fully comprehend what they both had lost.
"Alex's dad is the only one who knows, besides Keller, and some medical records hidden away somewhere," Steve said.
"Her mother doesn't know?" Danny asked in surprise.
Steve looked over at him. "No. Alex said she couldn't tell her, yet."
Danny whistled softly. "That's gonna be a tough one."
"Yeah, and I'm afraid somehow Hannah Reilly will blame it on me," Steve confessed. "She's just starting to like me. I'd hate to go back to square one with her and I don't think Alex could handle that."
Danny nudged Steve with his elbow. "If you need anything…"
"I know where to find you, Danny."
They spent a few more minutes soaking in the sun and listening to the waves crash onto the beach before making their way back to the truck.
Steve's phone rang and he pulled it out of his pocket. "McGarrett," he answered and listened to the person on the other end. "Is she okay? Yeah…alright…I'll be there in twenty minutes." He ended the call, whipped open his door and jumped in.
"What's wrong?" Danny asked, settling into the passenger's seat.
"Natalie's having a meltdown," Steve replied as he started the truck. He made a 180 degree turn and sped down the road. "She's not responding to anyone. All she wants is daddy."
A/N: It's interesting how chapters turn out. I wasn't sure Steve would tell Danny about Alex and I finally decided that he wouldn't, but then he told me otherwise. I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Thanks for reading and reviewing.
A special thanks to my dear mother who was a huge help on this chapter. I think it was her that convinced Steve to "open up" and tell Danny about Alex. :)