Happy third anniversary to the Loud House! Here's another chapter in honor of it.
Disclaimer: I own nothing that has to do with Star Wars or the Loud House.
Chapter 8: That's No Moon…
(In the central hold area of the Millenium Falcon, Lincoln practices using his lightsaber with a Marksman-H combat remote, a hovering orb that shoots fake lasers. Luna watches him until she puts a hand to her chest suddenly sits down, looking like she's about to faint. Lincoln takes notice.)
Lincoln: (concerned) Are you all right? What's wrong?
Luna: (weary) Oh, man. I felt a great disturbance in the Force… As if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced. I'm afraid something terrible just happened. You better get on with your exercises. I'll be fine.
(Lincoln resumes training as Bobby enters the room.)
Bobby: (smiles) Well, we won't have to worry about those Imperial slugs. Told you we'd outrun 'em. We should arrive at our destination at oh-two-hundred hours.
(On the other side of the room, Lisa and Ronnie Anne are engrossed in a game in which three-demotional holographic monsters move on a table with small computer monitors on the either side.. Leni watches them.)
Leni: Be careful, Lisa.
(Lisa taps the computer with her robotic claw hand, causing one of the holograms to step forward on the table. Ronnie Anne sends a creature on her side to the center and the two wrestle with Lisa's emerging victorious.)
Ronnie Anne: (disappointed) Aw, nuts.
Leni: She made a fair move. Complaining about it like won't help.
Ronnie Anne: I just never lost to an astro droid before.
Lisa: My programming allows me to know this game like the back of my metal hand. You shouldn't underestimate me.
Bobby: Try no to discipline her. It's not wise to upset someone who was trained by Wookiees.
Leni: But sir, no one worries about upsetting a droid.
Bobby: That's 'cause droids don't usually punch people super hard. Ronnie's known to do that if she's provoked too much. She may not be able to rip arms out of their sockets like Wookiees can but she's a lot tougher than she looks. The Wookiees' training really affected her personality and combat skills.
(Ronnie Anne smiles proudly at Bobby's comment.)
Leni: (to Bobby) I see your point, sir. (to Lisa) How about a new strategy, Lisa. Let the Wookiee girl win. It'll guarantee to get us on her good side.
Lisa: Very well.
Ronnie Anne: You don't have to do that, but whatever. I appreciate it.
(Lincoln stands in the middle of the room holding his lightsaber up and watching the floating remote. Luna watches him carefully.)
Luna: Remember, a Jedi can feel the Force flowing through him.
Lincoln: You mean it controls your actions?
Luna: Partially. But it also obeys your commands.
(Suspended at eye level, the remote floats to one side of Lincoln and then the other. It moves back and forth. Lincoln watches it closely holding the saber firmly. Suddenly the remote emits a yellow laser beam. It hits Lincoln's leg, stunning him briefly and breaking his concentration.)
Bobby: (laughing) Way I see it, ancient weapons and hokey religions are no match for a good blaster at your side.
Lincoln: (putting his saber away) So you don't believe in the Force?
Bobby: Kid, I've flown from one side of this galaxy to the other, seeing a lot of strange stuff, but I've never seen anything to make me believe there's one all-powerful "Force" controlling everything. Of course, I've also never anything that proves it doesn't exist but I do know there's no mystical energy field controlling my destiny.
Luna: Why don't you try again, little dude. (takes a large helmet and places it on Lincoln's head which covers his eyes) This time, let go of your conscious self and act on instinct.
Lincoln: (scoffs) With the blast shield down, I can't even see. How am I supposed to fight?
Luna: Your eyes can deceive you. Just don't trust them.
(Lincoln ignites his saber again and the remote floats up again. He tries to feel its presence with the Force without seeing it. He swings the saber around blindly and the remote fires another laserbolt which hits him in the side. He loses focus again.)
Luna: Just stretch out with your feelings. Make sure it's a peaceful, easy feeling.
(Lincoln holds up the saber once more and stands in one place, seemingly frozen. The remote moves around a little and suddenly shoots again. This time Lincoln manages to deflect the bolts. The ball ceases fire, floats down and turns off.)
Luna: See? You can do it.
Bobby: Well, that was a little impressive. I'll give you that. But going good against remotes is one thing. Going good against the living is something else.
(A small light starts flashing on a control panel and a beeping sound goes off.)
Bobby: Looks like we're coming up on Alderaan.
(Bobby and Ronnie Anne gat up and head back to the cockpit.)
Lincoln: You know, I did feel something. I could almost see the remote somehow.
Luna: (smiles) That's good. You've taken your first step into a larger world.
(In the Death Star conference room, which is now empty, Flip sits in his chair while Darth Lola stands off to the side of the room. An officer walks in.)
Flip: Yes?
Officer: Our scouts have reached Dantooine. They found the remains of a Rebel base, but they estimate that it has been deserted for some time. They are now conducting an extensive search of the surrounding systems.
(The officer leaves. Flip stands up, frustrated.)
Flip: She lied! She lied to us!
Lola: See? She doesn't have it in her to consciously betray the Rebellion.
Flip: Then she's dead weight to us. Terminate her immediately!
(In the cockpit of the Falcon, the pilots get ready to exit hyperspace.)
Bobby: Stand by, Nie Nie. Cut in the sublight engines.
Ronnie Anne: Here we go.
(Bobby pulls back a control lever. The stars streaking past seem to decrease speed, then stop. The Falcon leaves hyperspace but then suddenly shudders and violently shakes. Bobby falls over and Ronnie Anne desperately grabs the controls to stabilize the ship. She sees asteroids racing towards them, battering the sides.)
Bobby: (getting up) What the…? What just happened?
Ronnie Anne: Aw, we've come out of hyperspace into a meteor shower. Some kind of asteroid collision. It's not on any of the charts.
(Lincoln and Luna enter and sit behind.)
Lincoln: (bewildered) What's going on?
Bobby: Something's not right. Our position is correct, except… there's no Alderaan!
Lincoln: What do you mean? Where is it?
Bobby: That's what I'm saying, kid. It ain't here. It's been totally blown away.
Lincoln: What!? How!?
Luna: Destroyed… by the Empire!
Bobby: That seems unlikely. The entire starfleet couldn't destroy a whole planet. I'd take a thousand ships with more firepower than…
(A beeping sound is heard on the control panel.)
Ronnie Anne: There's Another ship coming in. Looks like an Imperial fighter.
(A TIE fighter flies past the window from over them and keeps moving forward.)
Lincoln: It followed us!
Luna: Couldn't have. It's a short range fighter.
Bobby: There aren't any based around here. Where'd it come from?
(The Falcon chases the fighter out of the asteroids.)
Lincoln: It sure looks like it's in a hurry. If they identify us, we're in big trouble.
Ronnie Anne: (presses controls) Not if I can help it. Jamming its transmissions.
Luna: I'd be best to let it go, dude. It's too far out of range.
Bobby: No for long…
(They continue going after it. Luna looks closely at it.)
Luna: A fighter that size couldn't get this deep into space on its own.
Lincoln: Maybe he was part of a convoy or something and got lost.
Bobby: Well, he won't be around long enough to tell anyone about us.
(The Falcon keeps tailing the fighter. A round object becomes visible in the distance.)
Lincoln: Look, he's headed for that small moon.
Bobby: I bet I can get him before he gets there. He's almost in range.
(They get closer to the "moon". Luna notices something about it.)
Luna: (suspicious) That's no moon… It's a space station.
Bobby: It's too big to be a space station.
(They get closer and see the sphere is dark gray-colored.)
Lincoln: (frightened) I have a bad feeling about this.
Ronnie Anne: And there it is.
Luna: (to Bobby) Turn the ship around.
Bobby: (concerned) Yeah… I think you were right. (operates controls) Full reverse. Ronnie, lock in the auxiliary power.
(The ship shudders and the TIE fighter flies away to another part of the station. They keep moving closer to the monstrous metallic sphere.)
Lincoln: Why are we still heading towards it!?
Bobby: We're caught in a tractor beam! It's pulling us in!
Lincoln: There's got to be something you can do!
Bobby: Afraid not, kid. We're in full power. We're gonna have to shut down. But they're not getting me without a fight!
Luna: You can't win. But there are alternatives to fighting.
Lincoln: Like what?
Luna: Like tricking them into thinking we're not here somehow.
(The Falcon is dragged into the equator of the Death Star and slowly moves towards the entrance of a docking port. Several stormtroopers and Death Star troopers patrolling the equator watch it get pulled in.)
Intercom: Clear bay twenty-three-seven. We are opening the magnetic field.
(The helpless ship enters the port and sets down. Stormtroopers and officers rush down the hallways to inspect the unidentified spacecraft. Back in the conference room, they get a call.)
Flip: (pushes button on intercom) Yes?
Intercom: We've captured a freighter entering the remains of the Alderaan system. It's markings match those of a ship our forces on Tatooine saw blast out of Mos Eisley.
Lola: Whoever's on board must be trying to return the stolen plans to the princess. She may yet be of some use to us.
(In the port, a division of stormtroopers and several officers surround the ship which entrance ramp is now open. Lola enters the port and walks in front of everyone. An officer and a few stormtroopers come down the ramp.)
Officer: (to Lola) No one's on board, boss. According to the log, the crew abandoned ship right after takeoff. It could be a decoy. The escape pods have been jettisoned.
Lola: (confused) No one's there? Not even any droids?
Officer: Nope. If there were, they must have also bailed out.
Lola: Well, I guess we could just blow this off as some kind of a stupid prank. (suspicious) However, I sense something… A presence I haven't felt since… (to officer) Get on scanning crew on board. I want every part of this ship checked!
Officer: Yes, ma'am.
(Lola leaves the port. Later, in the Falcon, a stormtrooper walks through the central area. He meets with another that checked another part.)
Stormtrooper: There's no one here.
(They exit the ship. A moment later, a part of the floor suddenly lifts up and moves to the side. Lincoln and Bobby emerge from the opening. Another floor panel lifts up next to them and Luna emerges from it.)
Lincoln: Boy, it's lucky you guys had these compartments.
Bobby: We just use them for smuggling cargo. We never thought we'd be smuggling ourselves in them. (disgusted) This is ridiculous. Even if we could take off, we'd never get past the tractor beam.
Luna: Just leave that to me.
Bobby: Damn fool, I knew you were gonna say that!
Luna: Who's more foolish: the fool or the fool who follows him?
Ronnie Anne: (poking her head out of Lincoln and Bobby's compartment) Hey!
(Soon, all the Imperial forces surrounding the Falcon have left except two stormtroopers, one tall and one short, guarding either side of the ramp. Two engineers carry a heavy box over.)
Stormtrooper: The ship's all yours. If the scanners pick up anything, report it immediately.
(The engineers carry the box up the ramp. The stormtroopers then heard the sound of the box hitting the ground. Then a voice called out.)
Bobby: Hey down there! Could you give us a hand with this?
(The stormtroopers casually go up the ramp and once inside, two quick blaster shots are fired.)