"Do you believe me yet?"

Severus stared at her. There had to be something else. Enough time had passed to eliminate polyjuice, but he just couldn't succumb to the belief that what she said was true, that this was really her.

"I can tell you don't." She began again, her voice brittle with emotion. "Use what spells you want. Kill me if you must." She was fierce, accusatory, her eyes burning with a built-up rage. "I know what you are, what you've done, but I came to you for help."

"Help?" He found the word near impossible to say, it was almost as difficult as it had been to hear. Lily fucking Potter was asking for his help. And as always, the question had followed an accusation, a reminder of the shitty person she thought he was. "What makes you think I'd help a…" Mudblood. He wanted to say it, even if he didn't feel that way any more. He wanted to throw it in her face, but found himself unable to wound her.

"You can't say it, can you?" There was that air of defiance again, superiority. He had always hated that look. "Can you at least remove the ropes? I've spent enough time like this." Her voice trailed off, mind floating to somewhere Severus couldn't see. "Take my wand if you like."

He approached her in silence, the gears of his mind turning. The freckles across her nose were there, the mole on her collar bone. She was just as he remembered. "How…" He whispered to himself more than anything. It didn't make sense.

His wand was raised, the ropes that held her vanished with the assumption that should she attack, he could take her. Lily's hands gripped the fitted fabric across his chest. Holding on as if the cloth itself could change everything. Her head bowed, shoulders shaking, as a strangled noise escaped her lips. Severus raised his arm, his hand hovering a few inches above her shoulder. There, there? What kind of patronizing comment was that?

She made no attempt to hurt him, seeming unable to do anything but fall apart. His hand rested on her shoulder blade in awkward contact, trying to provide a comfort he didn't know how to give. He let her cry on him, unable to break whatever release this was. Instead, he kept his mouth shut. It's her…its really her.

"I suppose you want answers." She sniffed after several minutes had passed. When she looked up at him again, a blush had filled her cheeks. The tears that had spilled from her eyes left clean tracks through the dirt that covered her.

"I do." His eyes flit over her, the distress she was in, the state of her clothes. Her sleeves were long, her trousers reaching her feet, very little skin was exposed. If what he could see was this disheveled, then how destroyed was what was underneath? "But, I believe it would be wise to bathe first." It occurred to him then that she had never been inside his home, hadn't even been this close to him.

"I thought we were supposed to be friends? Best friends?"

"We are, Sev."

Damn those memories. "Come. Its just upstairs." He attempted to lead her, but she remained rooted in place, staring at him with fearful eyes.

"I think I'm quite capable of finding it on my own."

"By any means." He smirked at the tone of her voice. "Go ahead. I'll be waiting."

Xxxx

Lily stared at him. She tried to decipher his body language, to read his expression, and came up with nothing. The anger that had been there when he found her, the venom in his voice. It was a side of him she never cared to see again.

He was cruel, different than the small boy she had known. No longer a boy at all, but a man. But, at the same time there was a…softness to him. She wasn't sure she could use that word to describe him. All she knew, was that he was unlike the men she had recently spent her time with.

She had placed herself against him in a moment of weakness and gratefulness, but had he tried to touch her? No. Still, the thought of him taking her to the place she would be stripped naked was too much to bear. After all she had been through, she needed to do this on her own.

Upstairs, that's where he said the bathroom was. She took hesitant steps away from him, half expecting him to follow. Instead he resumed his seat, picking up the nearest novel and skimming the pages as if she hadn't just made an appearance akin to a magic act. When his inquisitive eyes were no longer on her, her walk turned more into a run. She took two stairs at a time, each squeaking beneath her feet.

The landing brought her to three doors. Assuming a bedroom would be on either side, she selected the center one and found herself correct. The room was small. Featuring the usual facilities with no extravagancies and only a small place to stand. She stepped on to the tile, locking the door before double and triple checking that it was secure.

She faced the mirror, taking in the image of herself. The person staring back wasn't someone she recognized, had ever seen before. Her skin was pale from being out of the sun for so long. The green of her eyes now dull. Raising her wand, she sliced the matted hair that hung around her face. Large chunks of red fell to the ground, tickling her feet. The mess steadily growing as the hair that was attached was snipped before being discarded in the trash.

When she was finally satisfied, she turned, avoiding the sight of herself in the mirror. The crusty clothes were peeled from her, specks of dirt falling to the floor. She wanted nothing more than to set the robes alight, burning her memories of them along with it.

The knob was turned, the shower head sputtering to life. Scalding water soon dripped from it, filling the room with steam. Lily stepped beneath, the hot drops searing her flesh. A bar of soap sat on a shelf of the shower. She held the ivory brick in her hands, the scent coming from it comfortable, familiar.

No matter how much time had passed, the scent of soil wet from rain, of green shoots coming through the ground, the scent this bar held, were entirely his. She had noticed it on his skin earlier, but had been concerned with other matters. He was so like the Severus she had known, but, yet, so different. With no other option, she grabbed it.

She watched as her skin faded from the brown of filth to its natural, nearly translucent shade. She scrubbed furiously at her skin, until it grew an angry red. Still it wasn't enough. Water could never wash away the things that she had been through, the things that she had been done to her. The scars that now marked her, the fresh scabs, would forever remind her of things she could never forget.

She stepped from the tub and found a fresh set of robes waiting for. Instinctively, she used her hands to cover herself, afraid that he may still be lurking in the room. Her eyes darted from side to side in nervousness before realizing she was alone. She felt nauseous at the thought that he was here, and she hadn't even known. Had he snuck a peek? Panic rose up in her, closing her throat. She slammed her eyes shut, pushing the memories away and focusing on the clothes that been left. No matter where they had come from, she needed to wear something.

The robes were black, a style much like the ones Severus wore. She assumed that they were in fact ones he wore, but these ones appeared to be to more feminine, smaller than what would fit his broad frame. Transfigured, of course. She dressed.

Xxxx

"You came in?"

Lily's voice, no matter how quiet, interrupted his reading, and he closed the book with a thud. "I'm no pervert." When he faced her, she looked entirely different than minutes before. Her hair had been cut short, a bit like that of a fairy's, and she was unblemished. Her arms were crossed over her chest protectively. "Magic. I didn't even open the door."

Her posture relaxed, as if she hadn't considered magic being a possibility. He eyed her carefully, still bloody confused by the entire situation he had found himself in. This hadn't been the plan for this evening, hadn't been the plan of any evening, and he must be getting back. He had left as class ended. His day was far from over.

"Severus, I…I don't know anything." She looked away from hm, taking a seat on the couch near him and collapsing in on herself. The shock of whatever she had been through appeared to take over. Her eyes were vacant, unfocused on the moment they were in. "I don't know where my husband is, my son…are they alive?"

He simply stared, never imaging he would have to be the one to break this to her. Potter, the insolent little… He felt a sneer threatening to break out, but controlled it in her presence. "James was killed the night you were attacked. Then again, we thought you were too."

"We?"

"Potter- Harry is famous. The fate of your family is well known. He was the only one to survive." Or so we thought.

"Survive?" She gasped. "He's alive?" Tears welled in her eyes again. Her hands shook as she twirled the wedding ring on her finger.

"As of mere hours ago, yes."

"Harry…my Harry." She covered her mouth, rocking back and fourth in her seat.

He leaned forward, eyes narrowing as he stared at her. "Lily, where have you been?"

Lily drew in a shaking breath. The look in her eyes made it evident that she was debating telling him the truth. "What matters is I'm here now."

"And here? Why is that?" She stared at him blankly and he couldn't help the flickering of rage he felt at the expression. It was as if nothing between them had happened, had mattered. He had tortured himself over her fate, what had happened between them, for years. Since Harry had come to Hogwarts, it was worse. To be faced with the parentless child every day, to be in the boy's presence. It was a constant reminder of the horrors he had committed. And now, she was here. It was almost as if all that pain, the regret, had been pointless. "If you knew my position beneath the Dark Lord, why did you assume that I could be trustworthy? That I would help?"

She flinched at the snap in his voice. He hadn't intended to scare her further. But the brewing headache, the surprise that he had received. He wasn't entirely sure that he wasn't dreaming. He had expected to deal with a vagrant, not…

"Coming here was a chance in heck I had to take." He smirked at her language, her innocence. "My family is gone; my friends having received a similar fate. All that was left, was you. And even that I wasn't sure of…How did you know I was here?"

He ignored her statements, it made sense, he needn't respond, and instead focused on her question. "Wonderful little spell of mine. Warns me of intruders." He stood from his seat, giving the watch on his wrist a glance. "I'm afraid this reunion of sorts has come to an end. I must be getting back."

"Back?" There was the fear, again. It seemed she didn't want to be left alone. "Where are you going 'back' to?"

It was clear she knew absolutely nothing about the world that had gone on without her. He still had so many questions, but it wasn't fair to bombard her with them. The time would come. "Hogwarts."

"You…teach?" Her eyebrows knitted together at the question. It was pure curiosity. She wanted to know more about him.

"Unfortunately, yes." He stared at her. She was the reason he was a professor, in a way. "Perhaps you should come along, see your son." That did it. The tears of before had been either silent or contained. Now she let out gut wrenching sobs, wailing like a child in front of him and unable to form any, actual words. "I'll take that as a yes."

She nodded her head fiercely, standing so quickly she stumbled. The look on her face told him that she had never expected this moment, had never expected to see her son again. If he could repent for anything that he had done, this was the perfect opportunity. Returning a mother to her child.