Victoria's head was empty.
No clever response or witty remark to her husband's words came to her mind. She just stared back at him, not able to believe that he had finally found them. Even after almost two months of constantly living with the fear of being caught and nightmares about how they would be separated, the moment she had seen David in handcuffs had been worse than anything she could have imagined.
It had felt like the ground had slipped beneath her feet.
To Victoria, David was the man she was supposed to be with now; he was her rock, her protector, her partner. Everything the man standing right in front of her was not.
Not anymore.
Or maybe never had been.
"Victoria, come on, you must be in shock. Let me help you." Conrad bent down to her, gripping her shoulders to assist her with standing up.
Immediately, Victoria smelled his cologne, the cologne she had bought him for Christmas and which reminded her so much of their crumbling marriage.
"Don't touch me!" She hissed instinctively, freeing herself from his arms, although her knees still buckled when having to hold her full weight.
"Mom!" Daniel exclaimed, irritated by his mother's distant behavior towards his father.
Nonetheless, his parents didn't seem to take notice of their son as they kept staring at each other full of rage.
"Victoria, control yourself. People are already watching." Conrad approached his wife trying to create the impression of a friendly family reunion.
"I couldn't care less for those people." Victoria shrugged him off as she foresaw his attempt to embrace her.
He was right though. It seemed like the whole neighborhood had gathered around them to see what was going on. "Where is David? Where are you taking him?" Victoria said through gritted teeth when she heard an engine start. She turned around and saw a black van leaving the street while two men and a woman forced a little girl into another car.
"Exactly where he belongs. " Conrad replied with a smirk on his face.
"You cannot do this, Conrad! It's illegal! You have nothing against him and these men are not even from the police!" She screamed out angrily and noticed Amanda fighting against three adults with all of her power. Victoria had just promised to David to take care of his children, of all of his children, so she decided to run and free Amanda. However, Conrad caught her by the arm and one of the members of his security detail held her back, so that she could not leave the place.
"Oh, don't worry, I will make sure that the arrest of a wanted terrorist will be accepted officially."
"You're despicable, Conrad!" Her husband's self-conscious manner made Victoria lose her temper after all. She glared at him, remembering how much she had hated him controlling almost every aspect of her life which had been one of the main reasons why she had sought comfort in David. She knew that by no means she wanted to go back to her old life and the way Conrad tried to save himself truly disgusted her, so she didn't hesitate long and spat right into his face.
Conrad's only response to that was a quiet grunt before he took a tissue and wiped through his face. "Okay." He knew he had to stay calm not to provoke more attention than they already had. His goal was to return home with Victoria together and not to ruin what they had left with endless fights.
"Let's continue the conversation inside." Conrad made a step in the direction of the apartment and noticed his wife walking closely behind him.
"I will go with him, Conrad. No matter what. I will not let you take him away from me! You will not ruin my life again!"
"Mom, Dad!" Both of them turned around to see tears running down their son's face.
"See, what you do!" Victoria immediately went back to comfort Daniel assuring him that everything would be fine.
"Daniel, come inside with us now." Conrad motioned for his wife and son to follow him and without further interruptions they made it to what had originally been Victoria's and David's hiding place.
Just like that morning, 6-year-old Daniel Grayson was told not to worry and wait in the living room again. Meanwhile Victoria and Conrad had taken their corners in the bedroom and were ready to have one of their legendary fights. Strangely however neither of them seemed to find the right words to break the awkward silence which filled the room.
"Victoria, I…" Conrad began stepping closer to his wife when she instantly interrupted him and signaled him not to approach her any further.
"Don't, Conrad. I don't want to hear your accusations. You cannot make me feel guilty because that it is the last thing that I am. You are the one destroying innocent lives and just that you know: you will never convince me to assist you. I will tell the police everything and make sure that David will not have to pay for something that you did." Victoria tried her best to keep a cool head and chose her words carefully whereas Conrad's attempt to stay rationally was destined to fail.
"Victoria, it's true what I said. I did miss you. You're my wife and I need you by my side." His expression softened as he had made the decision to be honest with Victoria. To tell her that he wanted to take her back and do everything to save their marriage.
"Oh stop it, you liar!" Victoria rolled her eyes, definitely not seeing Conrad in the role of a suffering husband. "You won't succeed in drawing me in with your pathetic attempts to express your love for me. It's over between us. I thought my little note had made that more than clear. Even you should be able to understand that."
Obviously Conrad had been wrong to assume that David Clarke had turned his wife into a completely different person. She was very much her old self, so that he figured that there was still hope for them.
"I understand that you were angry at me…"
"I still am angry at you." Victoria corrected him.
"I also understand that. But giving up everything that we have built together seems a bit drastic to me. We've been together for 7 years now, Victoria. Don't let our marriage be proof of that stupid cliché. Just think of Daniel and how hard it would be for him to see us separated. I remember exactly how excited you were at the thought of us being a real family. Why do you want to throw that away now?"
"You don't give me a choice, Conrad." It was hard for Victoria to keep the tears form welling in her eyes when her husband made her recall happier times of their marriage and how enthusiastic she had been about living in a stable family environment for the first time in her life. As difficult as it was to admit to that, Conrad had been the man who had made her childhood dream come true in the first place. "It's not about us and it's not about Daniel. It's about what you did. You killed people, Conrad! And you're not even man enough to face the consequences."
"And you know why I do that?"
Victoria shook her head pressing her hand to her mouth not to break out into sobs. The emotional confrontation she had feared for so many weeks was too much for her in her fragile state.
"I do it for you and for my son. Because without me you would lose everything. My reputation would be completely ruined and so would be yours. I don't want my family to live in shame and poverty while I rot away in a prison. I once promised you I would give you the moon and I am determined to hold onto that promise." Conrad noticed Victoria's trembling lip and her icy glare turning into a desperate expression which meant that he had succeeded in getting through to her.
Victoria didn't know how to react since she had only expected her husband to give her an angry lecture on how much her betrayal had offended him. But now he offered her an explanation which even seemed logical to her. In short, she was utterly confused.
"Stop manipulating me. That doesn't work for me anymore." Victoria sniffed regaining her composure. His sentimentality would not distract her from all the horrible things Conrad had done. "You tortured Roger Halsted. That alone shows how sick you are."
"I didn't torture him. I gave the order to get all the information from him we needed to find you. And it worked. Just like I didn't kill anyone. It was decided by forces far above me and I played along to keep my family and my company save." Conrad defended himself not wanting to stray from the topic. "I needed to make sure that you and Daniel were fine. I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if something happened to you."
"I don't need you to look after me. All I want is to distance myself from you now."
"Victoria, please. Don't you realize that I'm trying to make things right between us again?"
"You should've thought about that before you slept around with all those whores. I'm done with you." Victoria snapped back, but Conrad still wasn't willing to give up.
"They never meant anything to me. And I will tell you again and again how sorry I am. With you and Daniel being gone, the house was so empty. I realized that I was a fool for not respecting my family."
Why was he telling her all of this now? She had waited to hear those words from him for months. Her husband genuinely apologizing to her, admitting his mistakes; this had been a daily vision in Victoria's head long before David had even entered her life. At the right time, she would've considered Conrad's confession a first step towards reconciliation. He couldn't know however that in that moment, his timing couldn't be worse.
"Victoria, I love you." Conrad came closer to her, his arctic pools staring at her intensely. "I've never stopped loving you."
Tears began to flood Victoria's eyes again. She hated herself for being so vulnerable in front of her husband, but his heartfelt words made her head spin. What did he expect her to say now? That she loved him back and they could return home together, when it was more than clear that her heart belonged to another man? Conrad obviously ignored that fact and instead he stepped right in front of her and slowly tucked a streak of her hair behind her ear.
"Don't cry, Victoria. You don't have to worry now. Our private jet is ready to take us everywhere you want to go. Just tell me." It was such a relief to Conrad that he could be so close to his wife again. She clearly needed some time to process everything before she could give him the answer he longed to hear.
Quite contrary to what Conrad believed, Victoria didn't struggle to find the right words to express her consent to his plans, but rather found it difficult to come up with the perfect sentence to demonstrate that she wouldn't go anywhere with him; that once and for all it was over between them.
Therefore she raised her head as the tears stopped welling in her eyes and glanced at Conrad with a serious expression before she uttered the words which seemed perfectly on point to her.
"I'm pregnant."
Conrad furrowed an eyebrow in disbelief, not knowing what to make of that.
"And your memory should be good enough to remember that this cannot be your child."
He quickly took a few steps backwards, almost falling over his own feet. From a distance he now glared at his wife, trying to come to a conclusion from the information he had just been given.
"No. You are lying. You cannot fool me, Victoria. I will not let you go." Conrad spoke with a dry mouth when he saw a sad smile appearing on Victoria's lips.
"I'm not lying, Conrad." She smoothed the material of her dress, so that her baby bump became clearly visible and fearfully awaited Conrad's reaction. She had never planned to reveal the pregnancy to him, but in that moment she wanted him to know the truth.
"How could you let that happen?" Conrad breathed, pressing a hand to his forehead while he was unable to look away from Victoria's stomach. "Victoria, you're my wife." He had really believed in taking her home today, but with those words Victoria had caught him completely off guard.
She met his wandering eyes and in them she detected such hurt which she had never seen before. For a moment Conrad seemed broken, as if the world had just crashed above him. Therefore, Victoria was satisfied. Satisfied, because she knew now that her husband was not the only person who was able to hurt her, to destroy her vision of the future, but that she herself was also very capable of doing the very same to him.
"I don't love you, Conrad." She faced her husband's empty glare and protectively laid a hand on her stomach since she was sure that it wouldn't take long until he would let out his frustration and anger on her. In the meantime however she wanted to make the best out of his state of shock and went on. "Over the course of the last few weeks, or even months, I have realized that, in fact, I have never really loved you. Believe me, I wanted to love you, I tried; I mean you left your wife to be with a girl who wanted to marry you because of your money, so I figured I should pay my respects to your sacrifice and be a perfect wife to you and mother to our son. But, Conrad, you never gave me enough reason to do that. You took me for granted, you made me your trophy and expected me to keep quiet when you entertained your mistresses. I would've divorced you earlier, but I stayed with you for Daniel's sake, because I wanted him to grow up in a family. The moment you told me about your involvement in those terrorist attacks, I finally saw you for the cruel man that you are and I will never let you make me become such a monster." Victoria closed her mouth, surprised by how smoothly those words had slipped from her tongue. She should've said them months ago. However, she had been too afraid and had not believed in her relationship with David enough to throw her privileged life away and be with a man who made her feel like a love-struck teenager all over again. As a result, that man was on his way to prison in that exact moment, only because she didn't have the courage to tell her husband what she truly thought of him.
"I cannot believe that you just said that." Conrad came to his senses after the first minutes of pure shock. "You're nothing but an ungrateful bitch." He quickly took a few steps forward grabbing Victoria's wrists and pushing her back against a wall. He instantly noticed her gasping for air and the horrified expression on her face. If she was brave enough to confess to him that their marriage had basically always been nothing but an illusion, she also had to deal with the consequences of the yearlong betrayal. "You cannot have this child, Victoria. You're still married to me and I won't let you bring such shame over my family." Conrad's blood was boiling, he kept staring at his wife and completely lost control as he was constantly reminded that she was carrying another man's child, a man for whom he didn't feel the slightest form of pity or regret for what was coming at him in the nearer future. "You let that idiot impregnate you and then ran away with him to pretend that you two could be together although you knew for sure that I would never let that happen? That's cruel, Victoria. You're no better than I am. It's better if this child will never live to know what foolish parents it has."
Slowly Victoria felt Conrad's knee moving higher and higher until it reached her stomach. She threw her head to the side, trying with all of her strength to break free from his firm grip, but it was impossible to move for Conrad kept her pressed to the wall with his body.
"You should've known that I'm stronger than you." He whispered into her ear, clearly feeling the baby bump beneath her dress. "I gave everything to you. A huge house, all the clothes in this world, a son, my admiration and love, everything a woman could ever dream of. I thought you were special, the mysterious beauty with that sad look on her face as she worked day after day in a small art gallery. It seems however that this girl was only a good actress. You're so cheap, Victoria, you couldn't even keep your legs together for some poor guy working at my company."
"I hate you, Conrad." Victoria managed to say when tears began to appear in her eyes again. She tried pulling her hands away from him desperately, but he only dug his fingers deeper into her flesh causing her to scream out in pain. The next second she wanted to kick him with her feet since he only balanced himself on one leg, but again Conrad was quicker and stronger than her and kept her from raising her leg. Victoria's heart was beating at full speed as Conrad pressed his knee further against her baby bump and quietly laughed to himself.
"Conrad, you wouldn't dare." Victoria whispered, feeling the need to vomit right into her husband's face. She had never been so afraid of him and it almost seemed like her confession had made him go insane.
"Oh, so where is your heroic boyfriend now? Will he not come here to protect you and your sweet little bastard child?" The next second, Conrad released Victoria's wrists and stepped back from her seeing how she let out a sigh of relief and leaned against the wall.
"I have always been there to protect you, Victoria. Always. But if you decide not to deny your affair with David and give birth to his child, I will not do anything for you. You'll be on your own, without money and you can be certain that I will make sure that you'll never see David again."
"Don't be so self-confident. You will most definitely get what you deserve." Victoria stood up against her husband, slowly recovering from the threatening situation. "And I won't be alone with my children around. I guess you will be the one left with nothing in the end." She forced herself to let that wicked smile of hers creep across her face, although she was still afraid of what Conrad would do to her next. In return, he let out a laugh and looked at his wife with amusement all over his face.
"So you really think I would leave Daniel here with you? He's my son and will be raised as a Grayson and not by a woman, who is not able to provide for him properly."
"You will not do that, Conrad! Daniel belongs with me, his mother!" Victoria screamed furiously running towards her husband who had already turned around to leave the room. "You don't love him as much as I do! You don't even have time to care for him!" She grabbed his arm holding him back as Conrad opened the door.
"You took him away from me first and made him endure all those weeks full of stress and fear. I wouldn't consider that the behavior of a good mother." Conrad pushed her away and went into the living room where Daniel was still sitting on the sofa.
"You've got no idea what you're talking about. Daniel had so much fun in that time because for the first time in his life he was allowed to be a child, far away from your control!" Victoria immediately went after her husband as he paced towards the sofa determinedly.
"Daniel, we're going home now." Conrad picked up his son with the intention of carrying him out of the apartment as quickly as possible, but Victoria stopped him.
"Conrad, I warn you! Don't do that!" She followed his every step and soon noticed her son leaning over his father's shoulder and stretching out a hand to her. "Daniel, I'm so sorry." Victoria took her son's hand facing his frightened expression.
"Your mother won't come with us, Daniel. She stays here, because we are obviously not important enough to her. "Conrad gripped his son's arm and pulled him away from his mother.
"Mom, no!" The 6-year-old screamed, not understanding what was going on between his parents.
"Don't listen to your father. He's lying. Tell him that you want to stay here with me." Victoria kept walking a few steps behind Conrad to keep eye contact with Daniel.
"Dad, I don't want to leave Mom. Let me down!"
Nevertheless Conrad didn't stop on his way to the black limousine which parked in the street.
"Conrad, you heard him!" Victoria enclosed her hand around that of her son again, however she slowly felt her legs getting tired.
"Learn to accept the consequences for your actions, Victoria. Good bye." He pulled open the door of the car quickly placing Daniel on the back seat.
"I promise we will be together again, Daniel, don't worry. I will find a way. I love you, baby." The last thing she saw before Conrad violently slammed the door shut, was the pain on her son's face.
She would be forever haunted by that, haunted by the fact that she had sacrificed being a mother to her son for fighting for a man and their future as a family.
As she watched Daniel driving away in a car with his father, she realized however that she could never live a fulfilled life like she had imagined, even if David escaped the fate of being framed as a terrorist. Without her son, she knew that she could never be truly happy again. She had already lost a piece of her heart 20 years ago and she couldn't bear to lose another one.
Victoria ran back into the apartment breaking down onto the sofa where minutes ago her little boy had still been sitting. She held a pillow against her face and let out a heart wrenching scream into it before she began to sob hysterically.
What had she done? She had wanted to be brave, resistant to her husband's psychological threats, but the moment he had taken Daniel from her, she had started to doubt everything she had told herself would be possible for her and David and their children.
After all, she had to accept that Conrad would always hold power over her as long as he had Daniel. And he knew that. It had been his last chance to make her surrender, but with her revealing the pregnancy to him she had destroyed her possibility of a compromise to live with a man she despised, but with her son.
She began to question herself if it was really worth it.
Perhaps the weeks she had spent with David had been nothing but a fun adventure to her, an opportunity for her to experience a sense of freedom in the arms of a man who treated her with so much love and respect like nobody had ever done before. But now it seemed like it was time for her to go back to the life she had chosen and was bound to as the mother of a 6-year-old son whom she really loved more than anyone else. Even if it meant being Conrad's slave again, sending an innocent man to prison for life and leaving a little girl without a father and therefore selling her soul to the devil himself.
Victoria leaned back on the couch holding the pillow pressed tightly to her body and realized that she could never be without Daniel.
Nevertheless, Conrad had made it more than clear that he would by no means accept another man's child in his home.
That was the dilemma.
And of course not only that.
She had also promised to stay by David's side, no matter what; to take care of his children, of Amanda and their unborn baby; for God's sake he had even proposed to her and she had said yes. She was wearing his dead mother's ring. Charlotte, his only family left, had to die because of them. It all seemed so surreal to Victoria. Like all those things had happened in another world and not only some weeks ago. It was like a tragic love story, but Victoria knew that her life had never been supposed to be a love story of any kind.
And still she was sitting there, tears in her eyes, David's ring on her finger and for the first time she thought she felt the baby move in her stomach. Surprised, one of her hands flew to her belly when she felt it again. It was only the slightest movement, but it was definitely there.
Inevitably Victoria had to smile. Someone obviously wanted to remind her that she had made the decision to run away and risk everything for a reason.
She wanted to save her baby from the toxic influence of the Hamptons and see it being raised by its real father and with its sister. Still, Daniel was also part of that vision of hers.
But was one threat by Conrad really enough to destroy her determination to carry out her plan?
He had no right to keep Daniel from seeing his mother and use him as a means to make her crawl to him on her knees begging him to take her back. Not to mention his false accusations against David.
Victoria wiped the fresh tears from her eyes. She wouldn't be defeated so easily. She decided that there was no either or when it came to choosing between her son and David. She would save both of them. No matter how impossible that idea seemed, Victoria was sure that she would find a way to make it happen.
For a moment, she remembered how David had told her to let him take care of her the night he had found out about Conrad's intention to frame him as a terrorist.
He had sounded so convinced that he would be the one to protect Victoria, when she had known all along that in the end she would be the one saving him.
After all, she had been right about that, so why shouldn't she be right about saving both, her son and David.
Suddenly another memory from that night came to Victoria's mind.
That number. David had given her a phone number without telling her to whom it belonged.
The only thing that he had told her had been that she should keep it and call the mysterious person if he got arrested.
Lead by new hope to resolve her precarious situation, Victoria paced over to her bag, pulling out her purse and praying that she had been wise enough to keep the number somewhere.
Fortunately, that had been the case.
She unfolded the small piece of paper triumphantly and did not lose any time to cross the room and pick up the receiver of the telephone.
Attentively she began to dial the number and then waited for the other person to pick up.
So that was a lot of ConVict, which I really needed to add new problems for the characters. Epsecially for Victoria, because she is now in a very difficult situation and has to decide in which world she wants to live: Grayson or Clarke.
As for the conversation between Victoria and Conrad, I've thought about their twisted relationship a lot and this dialogue basically represents to which conclusion I've come.
Please review and feel free to share your thoughts with me! :)