Somewhere far away Victoria heard a quiet beeping sound. She didn't like that sound – not at all – but she noticed that it slowly came closer and began to grow louder.
"No." She mumbled because she didn't want be pulled out of her deep slumber. She wanted to stay in that world of darkness forever – she didn't have to feel anything there, she was simply numb. As the noise became louder and louder Victoria desperately wanted to cover her ears with her hands. That turned out to be a painful mistake though. Abruptly her eyes shot wide open because of the stinging pain in her right hand. The first thing she then saw was the needle in her hand. There was also a tube attached to that and a liquid was dripping through it. With a sudden panic taking hold of her body she could identify it as an infusion. Slowly also her blurry vision became clear again and when she looked around Victoria realized with shock that she was lying in a hospital bed. The white walls with tasteless paintings, the flowers on her nightstand and the devices attached to her body being the source of the beeping noises.
First she had scanned her environment, but then Victoria turned to herself. She looked down on her body in the lying position and besides the horrible hospital gown she noticed that something was gone.
"No." She whispered once more with a hoarse voice and moved her left hand to feel her stomach. There was nothing – or better no one there. Her baby was gone. In tiny pieces the memory of what had happened came back to her. Her pulse began to race when she remembered the abduction and the scene that had occurred in her bedroom in Grayson Manor afterwards. In a state of shock she tried to sit up in the bed but immediately felt a strong pain in her abdomen causing her to wince.
In that moment the door to the hospital room was carefully opened and a serious looking Conrad entered. When he saw that his wife was obviously awake however his face turned into an expression of relief.
"Victoria, thank God you're okay." He raced over to her and stood beside the bed not sure if he could touch her.
"What, what happened?" Victoria asked still confused and in denial of the fact that she was not carrying her baby anymore.
"You really had me worried, you know." With honest concern in his voice Conrad placed a kiss on his wife's forehead and caressed her cheek.
"Conrad, no." Victoria stammered shaking her head at his touch. "Where's my baby?"
"Victoria…" Conrad breathed not quite sure how to address the matter. It was difficult for him to see Victoria lying there so helpless and disturbed. He had never wanted that to happen.
"Where is she?" Victoria asked again with frenzy in her eyes staring at Conrad. She tried to sit up again but had to give in to her exhausted body and the dizziness in her head.
"She's alive, Victoria." He told her with a dry voice and instantly Victoria's features grew softer. After the shock, then came the tears and she soon noticed her cheeks getting wet.
"Victoria, your daughter survived." Conrad didn't know what else to say in that situation. He only wanted Victoria to be safe and healthy, but to know that her and David's child had entered this world as of that day was too much for him. If he only thought about that, he became angry and was overwhelmed by his feelings.
"But why is she not here?" Victoria insisted.
"They had to take her away because she was born so early. She needs special care and they can't provide that for her here." He did his best to sum up the information the doctor had given him. It had been the first moment of pretending to worry about his daughter and already it had made Conrad sick. He didn't even want to think about how many of those moments were yet to come.
"No, you took her away." When Conrad's gaze had turned into his normal calculating manner again, Victoria began to suspect a scheme. "You don't want her to be with me. You want to take her away from me, like you have wanted right from the beginning. Because she is David's daughter. But you won't fool me."
"Calm down, Victoria. That's not true." Annoyed by his wife's accusations even in that exceptional situation, Conrad tried his best not to lose his temper.
"Don't even try to convince me of the contrary!" Angrily Victoria then raised her voice when the door of the room was opened again. A doctor came in and noticed the tense atmosphere between husband and wife.
"Mrs Grayson." He addressed her in a soothing tone and stood on the other side of her bed. "I'm glad to see you're awake."
Irritated Victoria glanced from one male face to the other.
"Dr. Cooper would you please tell my wife about her daughter, she…" The doctor interrupted Conrad.
"I will Mr Grayson. We'll just take it slow, okay?" He threw him a look saying that he shouldn't speak to Victoria in that tone.
"Mrs Grayson, I'm Doctor Matt Cooper and I was here when you were brought into the hospital last night." The man reached out for Victoria's hand shaking it politely.
"What happened? Why is my daughter not here?" Victoria asked once more still sounding a bit unstable.
"I'll answer all of your questions, just please try to stay calm." Victoria nodded at the doctor's words and wanted him to continue. "What happened is that you had early contractions causing a preterm birth. While we never know what exactly caused this, we assume that it was your level of stress leading to a lack of oxygen in your placenta. We had to perform a Caesarian section to deliver your daughter, which went well, but because your daughter was born after only 29 weeks she is not in a stable condition. That's why we had to take her to Mount Sinai Hospital in New York City – to serve her special needs as a premature infant and monitor her vitals. She's at one of the best neonatal intensive care units and the doctors and nurses there are very experienced with preemies so your daughter is in best hands."
When Victoria didn't seem to react but simply kept staring in the empty air, Dr. Cooper continued speaking very calmly. "Do you understand me, Mrs Grayson? Your daughter is fine and she just needs intensive care. You don't have to be scared."
"Yes, I understand." Victoria breathed while suddenly her memories from Daniel's birth started coming back to her. How she had held him in her arms right after he had been born and how much love she had felt for him. And her daughter was now all alone, only with strangers; for the first moments of her life her own mother had left her alone. Victoria felt terrible if she only thought about that. No child should have to experience that.
"I have to be with her." She then said confidently and locked eyes with Dr. Cooper. "Please, you have to take me to her."
"We will, Mrs Grayson. Don't worry about that." The doctor assured her. "But you have to recover from the surgery first. You're on painkillers right now because the scar from the C-section – it hurts. It will take some time to heal and in the beginning you're not allowed to walk by yourself nor can you put any kind of pressure on it."
"But I have to be with my child, you cannot keep me from her."
"Please, Mrs Grayson, you have to understand that your body needs rest. You had to endure a lot and we can't put your health at risk." The doctor stayed very patient and tried to get through to Victoria but he soon noticed that she was too driven by her emotions to understand what he was saying.
"I don't care about my body. My daughter is all alone far away from here, I can't just lay here doing nothing." In a futile attempt Victoria tried to move up on the mattress and reached for the needle of the infusion in her hand before Dr. Cooper stopped her. "Let go of me!" She screamed when he touched her hand and kept her from meddling with the medical equipment.
"You're hurting yourself." He spoke very calmly and professionally while Conrad just stood helplessly beside the bed insecure about how to interfere with the situation. "I'll call a nurse and she'll pull out the needle. We can also try to put you in a wheelchair and see how well that works. If I think it's okay you can go to Mount Sinai Hospital as of today to be with your daughter." Finally he gave in to her. He couldn't take responsibility for keeping a mother from her newborn baby. Plus Victoria was really willing to fight and he couldn't deny her her wish.
"I'm ready." Victoria replied her eyes beaming with determination.
"I'll call the hospital and have them prepare a room for you." Dr. Cooper explained and looked over to Conrad. "Mr Grayson, are you okay with this? Of course you can accompany your wife to see your child."
"No, I…" Conrad hadn't been prepared to answer and found himself in the rare situation of not being able to reply right away. "I mean, yes, whatever you think is best. But I think I'd rather stay here with our son, Daniel. We had to leave him to our staff last night without saying goodbye. He's only six and I'm sure he's very confused right now." With his words he earned a knowing look from Victoria. They both knew it was a lie because Daniel was still in New York City with his grandparents and Victoria assumed correctly that he just couldn't bear to look at David Clarke's child and then pretend that it was actually his. He was aware that he couldn't avoid that situation for forever, but in that moment he didn't feel ready for it.
"I understand." The doctor said concerned because he didn't like the idea of Victoria in her fragile state going to the other hospital without someone familiar by her side. "Just know that you can take your son with you when you visit your wife in the hospital. I strongly advise you to spend time together as a family even though it's in a hospital room. I have seen it with many of my patients - it really gives you the strength to get through this new or difficult time."
"Yes, thank you, Dr. Cooper." Conrad had found his composure again. "We're really grateful for what you did for our family."
"There's no need to. It's my job and seeing you two and your daughter happy is the biggest reward I can hope for." He gave them both a smile hoping that they would take his advice. "I'll send a nurse right in here, Mrs Grayson."
"Thank you." Victoria said absentmindedly already picturing meeting her daughter.
When the doctor had left the room Conrad was glad that he could speak to his wife alone.
"Victoria, are you sure that this is okay? You heard him. You're still weak because of the surgery." Conrad tried to make her understand that he was honestly worried about her wellbeing. "I mean when you passed out at home… I thought… I thought…"
"I was dead?" Victoria finished his stammered sentence. All she could think about was her newborn baby and Conrad's fearful babbling was only getting on her already strained nerves.
"Yes. You were so pale and I swear to you sitting next to you on our bedroom floor holding your cold sweaty hand until the ambulance arrived were the worst moments of my life. I could not breathe properly until they told me that you had made it when I waited during the surgery." His usually so cool arctic pools now seemed to boil with emotions. It was a rare look Victoria had to admit.
"I'm not sorry for that Conrad. What do you want me to say? Pity you?" She gave him a stare so cold that he backed away a few inches. "It is because of you, of what you did and what you put me through that this happened. An innocent life was almost lost. I warned you if anything happened to my daughter, you would pay for it."
"Victoria." He snapped back irritated by her sudden rejecting behavior. "I never meant any of this to happen. I was worried sick about you. I don't get why you cannot understand that."
"I do understand it, trust me. It's just that I've had enough. All you do is keep hurting me and then telling me how much I mean to you. I've had enough of that sick game. All I do care about are my children and I want you as far away from them as possible." Victoria expressed the first clear thoughts she could form after she had woken up.
"Daniel is my son and you…" Before Conrad could continue arguing a nurse entered to check on Victoria.
After she had detached all of the medical equipment from Victoria's body she went on and checked her vitals trying not to be irritated by the icy atmosphere between husband and wife. She tried to engage in small talk, but all she kept on hearing was Victoria asking her when she could leave to see her daughter.
When Dr. Cooper had finally approved of Victoria's condition, she was so eager to get out of that hospital bed that she almost found herself lying on the ground again. She had to admit that she had overestimated her strength so that as soon as she managed to sit up and put her feet on the ground, she felt her legs giving in and a striking pain in her abdomen. So the doctor had been right – she only felt relatively fine because of her medication. But any kind of exertion pushed her body to its limits. With the help of two nurses however Victoria came to sit safely in the wheelchair only feeling a bit dizzy in her head.
"Can we leave now please?" Victoria asked impatiently, her brain blocking out everything else except for the thought of meeting her daughter. Somewhere in the back of her mind she did remember the abduction and all that had happened with the Initiative and also with Patrick. However it did not interest her in that situation. All of those memories and fears didn't reach the surface when she thought about her newborn child being miles away from its mother.
When the nurse pushed the wheelchair out of the room Conrad remained frozen to his spot beside the hospital bed and Victoria didn't even care to say goodbye to him. Shaken by a sleepless night and the stressful circumstances Conrad desperately buried his face in his hands. As if the David Clarke trial wasn't already enough of a nightmare. His worst fear had come true: Victoria's and David's lovechild had entered this world – in a way that had also weakened Victoria and made her hate her husband again. It couldn't have gone worse, Conrad found and almost felt a tear escaping his eyes.
"Mr Grayson, can I offer you any help?" Dr. Cooper came into the room when he noticed that Conrad still hadn't left. "In exceptional situations like this one it really helps to talk to someone professional."
"No, I'm fine." Conrad pulled himself together, adjusted his opened shirt and walked towards the door. "Thank you for helping my wife and her child." He shook the doctor's hand and then left Suffolk Memorial to grab a taxi and go home. Standing there on the concrete floor staring into the bright light of a clear winter morning Conrad felt it in his guts. That tiny human being had already and would continue to change his world for good.
"Victoria!" Amanda had been lurking into the corridor from behind her bedroom door and when she saw Victoria being transported out of her room on a stretcher, she couldn't stop the words from escaping her mouth. She didn't dare to move however for she was still shocked by the scene she had encountered a few minutes ago. Stirred up by loud voices, she had awoken from sleep in Victoria's bed. Fearing that Victoria might be angry at her for looking at her private photos the 9-year-old had braced herself for receiving some kind of punishment. However, she only had gotten to witness a fight between Mr Grayson and his wife who hadn't seemed to take any notice of her. But that fight had not been the worst. Before Amanda had even been able to understand what had been happening Victoria had broken to the ground obviously in pain and Mr Grayson had begun to panic and beg his wife to not leave him alone. Amanda had never seen him like that before – so uncontrolled and emotional. He had looked so frightened and Amanda hadn't known what to make of Victoria lying there with her eyes closed that she had started to sob. Luckily Mr Grayson had noticed her presence in the same moment that the maid Maria had come back to the room informing them that the ambulance should arrive any minute. She had then carried a shaking Amanda out of the room whispering in her ear that things would be okay and had brought her to her bedroom promising that she would check on her later.
The moment Amanda then called Victoria's name in the corridor while she was being brought out of the house and into the ambulance, no one reacted to the girl's words. Mr Grayson was almost as pale as his wife and silently accompanied the paramedics who gathered around Victoria using so many medical terms Amanda couldn't even begin to understand what they were talking about.
Was Victoria dying? Or was there something wrong with her sister? The 9-year-old desperately tried to make sense of the situation but she had to realize without anyone talking to her she couldn't know anything for sure. Feeling extremely helpless and worried about Victoria the girl started to cry again and curled up on the bedroom floor. Without Victoria, she didn't know how to go on. She was the only person who still cared about her in this world and the only chance to help her father. Without her she was lost, she would probably have to go back to that horrible hospital and accept all of those lies about her father. No, Victoria couldn't leave her alone, it just wasn't possible. But then again Amanda remembered how sick she had looked with her eyes closed lying on the ground and not moving anymore. Between her sobs she suddenly felt two hands lifting her up from the floor. When she opened her watery eyes she saw that it was Maria.
"Victoria is being brought to a hospital. So don't worry, she will be fine." The woman led the girl to her bed and tucked her in. "I'll stay in the house tonight so you're not alone. And now stop crying. Victoria wouldn't like that." Maria smiled at Amanda and wiped the tears from her cheeks with her thumb. At her consoling words and her warm features Amanda began to calm down. "See, that's better. You know what, I'm going downstairs now to get you a hot chocolate and then we can stay up a bit longer before we try to get some sleep. Does that sound alright to you?"
Approvingly Amanda nodded and Maria got up to leave the room. "Thank you." The girl mumbled still feeling some tears running down her cheeks.
One moment she had looked at all of those beautiful photos of her Dad and Victoria, for the first time in the last couple of weeks feeling close to him again and also to Victoria. And the next moment, when she had suddenly woken up, any comforting feeling she had experienced before had vanished completely. She felt so desperate again like she had before Victoria had taken her out of that mental institution. She was all alone, no one would tell her things and no one really cared about her. Yes, Maria was genuinely nice and Amanda really liked her, but still in the end the girl was all by herself. Amanda inevitably had to shiver at the frightening thought. However she also remembered that the real thing that mattered was that she needed to know what was happening to Victoria. The Graysons could probably afford the best doctors in the country, so Victoria would be fine, wouldn't she?
David had been surprised when he had been informed that Nolan Ross was there to see him. He hadn't been expecting any visitors on that day, because Ryan Huntley and Roger Halsted were practicing his testimony in Ryan's office. Nolan's unexpected visit surprised him all the more because the last time he had seen him he had run off plotting his strategy to interfere with Grayson Global's plan to forge evidence. David hadn't seen him since then and the moment he then saw him entering the room in prison, he really began to worry about what had happened during his absence. The first thing David noticed was that the 21-year-old didn't only seem to suffer from a loss of sleep judging from the way he was trembling and the dark circles under his eyes, but also that one of his eyes was swollen and blue as if he had been beaten up.
"Nolan, hey, what happened?" David stood up but Nolan just let himself sink onto the chair on the opposite side of the table. He hadn't slept the whole night spending it programming with Edith instead. There was not enough coffee in this world to keep him from almost falling asleep any second.
"David, I thought I should tell you before you hear it from someone else." He began to talk earning a confused look from David.
"What are you talking about?" David asked fearing that Nolan might faint any moment. "Please, tell me what happened. Are you okay? Because you certainly don't look like you are."
"David, listen, it's Victoria." Nolan didn't have the energy to beat around the bush one second longer. "She's in the hospital. The media is going crazy about it, because obviously some paparazzi took a photo of her being brought into Suffolk Memorial last night." He breathed in and out after he had managed to deliver the information. When he had heard about it that morning after getting out of the office at Grayson Global, he had been extremely shocked. He had witnessed what those people had put Victoria through and he feared the worst. If anything would happen to her, he thought that David should hear it from someone familiar and not some prison guards gossiping about it.
"What?" David uttered in shock immediately feeling his pulse race at the thought of Victoria or his child being in danger. "Are you sure that's true?"
"I am, David. I saw the picture. It was real." He was still disgusted by what lengths some people went to for their own profit. In the photo Victoria's face was hardly recognizable because it was hidden beneath an oxygen mask but seeing her lying on the stretcher with her eyes closed completely exposed to the public eye, really drove Nolan mad. He did not only despise the person who took the photo but also the tabloid papers that had already printed it and the so-called news programs showing it on TV.
"Is she okay? I mean, what has happened to her?" David asked petrified.
"I don't know, David. They haven't released a press statement or anything yet. People are only speculating, but I don't listen to any of that talk." Nolan had decided that until he could speak to Victoria himself, he wouldn't believe anything the media reports were saying. Of course they already assumed that her hospitalization had something to do with her pregnancy and rumors had it that she had given premature birth, but Nolan wanted to speak to her face to face before he trusted anyone else.
"Oh, I see." David could imagine what those speculations were about and just like Nolan he didn't like to think any further about them. No matter how disappointed he was by Victoria for not standing by his side and for not even talking to him, he now worried more about her than he had ever worried about his own fate since he had been imprisoned. It drove him mad to have the feeling of complete helplessness in there. He felt like he was only an observer of the life around him, but could not participate actively in it and support the people he loved. He couldn't do anything for Amanda and now neither could he for Victoria and their child. Out of desperation he covered his face with hands and shook his head.
"I'm so sorry, David. I know it's a difficult situation with you and Victoria… I mean from what you've told that you two wanted to stay together and now… well you obviously aren't… together I mean…" Nolan began to stammer reminding himself that he couldn't sound too concerned about Victoria because as far as David knew Nolan didn't know more about her than the fact that she had denied any kind of help. He was supposed to be disappointed by her not sick with concern about her wellbeing.
"No, really, thank you for telling me." David smiled sadly trying to distract himself from picturing Victoria in the hospital. "But you didn't tell me. What happened to your eye?"
"Uhhhm… well I fell on the stairs you know. I worked so hard and I was tired and I missed a stair and my eye hit the railing." Nolan was surprised at himself at how easy it was for him to come up with a fake excuse again.
"Are you sure?" David raised an eyebrow in disbelief at the young man's explanation.
"Yes, I am." He returned annoyed.
"I'm sorry; I didn't mean to insult you." David apologized taken aback by Nolan's tone of voice because usually he never lashed out at anyone.
"No, it's okay, I guess I'm just overworked an tired." He explained himself.
"I really appreciate your help and now you also came to me personally to tell me about Victoria. It's quite a lot. How about you go home and get the much needed sleep and we'll continue our talk tomorrow or whenever you like?" David offered him a light smile again.
"That sounds like a good idea." The young man tried to smile back but regretted wrinkling the skin around his eye because it still hurt like hell. He figured that it also might be a good idea to take care of his injury properly.
As David watched Nolan leave he decided that he couldn't believe what he had told him about what had happened to his face. He seemed so disturbed and not quite like himself that David was sure that he was hiding something from him. He didn't know what it was but he needed to find out. Although in that moment he couldn't get his mind to think about anything else than the fact that Victoria was obviously in danger. He knew that it was not his fault, but sill he wouldn't be able to forgive himself if something happened to her or their child. Even though he hated himself for thinking that, he just wanted their strategy with using Roger Halsted's testimony to work. He had despised the idea of endangering another person in the first place, but now he realized that it really was his last chance at getting his old or at least any life back at all.
I'm sorry for not updating earlier, but I just didn't find the time to continue writing and I also feel like I lack creativity at the moment because I have to put it in my work for university. I'm really not satisfied with how this chapter turned out but I also felt like I couldn't keep you waiting any longer. So I apologize if it doesn't keep up with my usually quality. I also will take a short break from writing fanfiction because I definitely need it and focus on other things so that I can return with new motivation. My brain feels like it's blocked with so many different things and I don't get anything done.
Thank you so much for all of your comments and your support, I can't wait to be back in a few weeks because I still have a lot to tell with my fanfic. Please let me know what you think about the latest chapter. :)
I appreciate all of you, xoxo.