Warfame is owned by people I don't know.
"What you do you mean with: I like her? I cannot believe this, Operator! You must be joking! Is this a proof that my grasp on humour is lacking? " A certain Cephalon yelled through the darkness.
"Sicarius, I swear to the void, if you wake me up one more time, I will find your data core and shove it into the next Grineer toilet, I find!" Ria shouted. This was the third time, the cephalon had awoken her because of one throw-away line. The Tenno turned over in her bed. Yes, she liked Sindr. Who wouldn't like a woman with this much guts? She groaned and scratched herself in the dignified way that only Tenno could. Her sleep cycle was ruined anyways. She might as well get up and be productive. Or she could stay in undies and sports-bra, lounge around in bed, eat way too much sugar and read that hilarious story some colonist had written about copulating Warframes.
Sure, technically the equipment was there, if hidden, but she had yet to meet a Tenno who had actually tried it. (That fact was more an indicator that Ria didn't interact much with her kind than anything else).
Decisions, decisions…
"Tenno, are you awake? I would like to have a word with you." A familiar voice demanded.
"Yes, Lotus, I'm awake." Said Tenno sighed "What can I do for you?"
"I am worried, Tenno. I was aware that you have spent less time with your siblings than others, but I could not imagine that you were this starved for closeness." Lotus said calmly.
"What?"
"Sicarius informed me of our predicament. It worries and disturbs me deeply."
"Ok! Stop!" Ria groaned "What did Sicarius tell you?"
"He alerted me of your infatuation with your prisoner. It worries me, Tenno. You spent less than 25 hours on a ship with this woman an-"
"INFATUATION?" Ria screamed "I said that I like her! Because she has spunk! I respect that! Void help me, I'll put that cephalon into a vacuum cleaner!"
A pause followed. "Maybe I was on edge." Lotus said as sheepishly as her monotone voice could manage "Sicarius was rather hyperbolic. And the words *ravenous lust* should have been a clear indicator."
"You think?"
"Tenno, you have to excuse a mother's fear. You are strong, but there are things that neither your Warframe nor the touch of the Void can protect you from."
"If anything, Sicarius was infatuated with her implants!" Ria groaned and flopped back onto the bed. "What is wrong with that cephalon?"
"There few old Cephalon that survived without damage. Forgive Sicarius for he meant well." Lotus said gently.
"I know, Lotus, but I am sick of this hypocrisy. He was drooling from the speakers when he had the chance to analyse Orokin tech. I try to find out more about the Grineer they are attached to and-"
"And once Sicarius has his data, he could throw those limbs away without a second thought. Could you do the same to the Grineer?"
Ria drew in a sharp breath.
"You are not heartless enough for that. Not to a prisoner, not to someone helpless."
"She can join Steel Meridian if she wants to fight or the Kavor Defectors if she wants peace, Lotus!" The Tenno said quickly. "She is not going back to the Grineer." She let out a sigh. "Getting killed and dissected for deviation… no, I can't see her doing that. If anything, she probably wants to die to my hands. They respect only strength."
"And if she asked you for this honour?" Lotus pushed.
"Then she gets an empty room, a Grataka and one bullet!" Ria yelled. "You are right, ok? I can't execute prisoners! It's dishonourable to kill someone who can't fight back. That has nothing to do with her being her! I'm soft, is that what you want to hear? That I'm weak?"
Silence. Ria covered her face with both hands.
"Loving life is not weakness, Tenno." Lotus said suddenly. "I apologize. It wasn't my intent to cause you distress. But you will face difficult decisions in the future. Prepare yourself, Tenno."
Lotus went silent and left Ria to stew in annoyance and frustration. She understood, she really did. Lotus had to care for many Tennos all over the system. And she had the soul of a fussy mom. As for Cephalon Sicarius, he had nobody to talk to and stewed in worries whenever the Tenno went to sleep.
BUT WHY DID THEY HAVE TO TAKE IT OUT ON HER?
"Sicarius!"
"Yes, Operator?"
„You have 1 minute to explain yourself." Ria said darkly. She had the urge to aim the Orbiter directly at the sun and stay aboard just to make sure that the last thing Sicarius saw was his charge dying.
"I admit freely that I used slightly alarming language, Operator, but my point remains. I have read the historic Orokin records. I know of the strong, sexual magnetism of the Grineer! It is only a matter of time unti-"
"What? Strong sexual… Void's sphincter, what are you talking about? Show me that record."
The screen next to the bed flickered and the Tenno crawled over. She began reading:
The Duchess and her loyal Grineer
by Oralkin696
Lua shone in silvery gleam, like a thousand ivory roses upo- she skipped -The Grineer held her in his adonic arms, nestled in the steely safety- she skipped –"Oh, Grut! If only you were Orokin and not a lowly drone! We would be wed within the hour and"- skip –And behind the orange gleam of his eyes was more than the mindless automation of the lowly Grineer. It was a sliver of- SKIP –"Dutchess, I you like! In heart!"
"Sicarius… what makes you think this is a historic document?" Ria asked in a deadpan voice.
"Simple, Operator! We uncovered it and many like it in an Orokin datavault that functioned as a public library. It was encrypted on the head-librarian's personal terminal. Why would she go through all that trouble of hiding it, if it wasn't censured material that contained information to be kept from public knowledge?"
"BECAUSE YOU FOUND SOME LONELY LIBRARIAN'S STASH OF PORN!" The Tenno screamed "For fucks sake, Sicarius, I don't mind explaining these things to you! Ask me stuff!"
"But Operator, pornography requires visual aid, right?"
"Not always… I'm not going into details right now, but this is neither historic nor a record… It's some lone nut's fantasy! seems like she got bored halfway through."
"I see, Operator, I shall erase them from-"
"Nah, keep them. They are probably the last copies of these texts." The Tenno said quickly. Destroying data of any kind seemed wrong to her on a fundamental level. And some of the other titles could contain insight into the values and mentality of lower-class Orokin society. And make one or two lonely nights less dull.
"What is our guest up to?" Ria asked after finally deciding to get up.
"She recently woke up and is now eating." Sicarius answered "She seemed confused when I inquired what flavour she liked for her rations."
The Tenno grimaced slightly. She had been worried that the confinement would be agony to her captive. But compared to how Grineer grunts usually lived, Sindr was probably having the time of her life.
"She did ask for a chance to shower, though."
Ria slapped her face. Stupid! The cell was equipped with a faucet and a lavitron for necessities, but it wasn't meant to hold prisoners long enough for them to need a shower. That lady had spent days upon days surviving in armour and the Warframe had no scent-receptors. Ria hadn't noticed, but the Grineer must have been reeking. "I don't suppose we have anything mobile that we can put in the cell?" She asked without much hope.
"Sorry, Operator, but the only hygiene station of this degree is the Operator's personal bathroom." Sicarius answered.
Ria bit her lip. It was a risk but she couldn't leave her guest in such a state. "Sicarius, prep my Transference suit and Excalibur, then seal all doors between the cell and my shower. I'll have to escort her…"
"Operator, I have to warn you. This is too much like page-"
Ria ignored him. "What is the status on her arm?"
"Actually, Operator, I have found something quite amazing." Sicarius said eagerly, his worries apparently forgotten. "There was a sequence micro carved into the length of the ulna. I was rather confused, since it was so small, only an in-depht scan could have hoped to find it. But I ran it through a few Orokin programs and it turned out to be a blueprint!"
"That drone carved a blueprint into the side of an arm?" The Tenno asked in confusion. "Why would they do that? What kind of blueprint is it?"
"It seems to be a communicator of sorts. If you wish, Operator, I could easily build one within the hour. We possess all the components required." The Cephalon said quickly. Ria could feel the excitement.
"Yes, fine, but don't activate it yet." She said and let out a sigh.
"As you wish, Operator!"
As Sicarius began to heat up the foundry, Ria dressed. Though it looked like a simple piece of black leather, the Transference suit was a marvel of Orokin technology. It was tight but flexible, it was smell-repelling, never stained and had functions that slowed down involuntary bodily functions to an amazing extend. And when plugged into the Transference chair, Tenno never needed to use the bathroom, worry about getting sweaty or starving. And to Ria, it felt like home.
Moments later, she was in Excalibur and walking through the ship. After checking every single door and getting a Lex, she went to the cell. This was going to be so weird.
The Tenno waited until Sicarius had announced her and entered the cell. Sindr was looking at a photograph of Saturn's rings on the screen, hardly aware that Ria had come in.
The Tenno cleared her throat.
Sindr didn't look at her. "This is incredible." She muttered, lost in the view.
"It was taken on the Kronia Relay." Ria explained. "You enjoy photography?"
"Seems that way…" Sindr mused. She blinked a few times. "I have seen plenty of planets from orbit… but I've never been. I don't know. I never felt much."
"Even during the Orokin era, many Grineer had their sense of aesthetics dulled." Sicarius said to Ria. "The builders were not supposed to enjoy the marvels they created. It's the reason why the Grineer never feel remorse when they turn planets in ugly factories."
"I am here to fulfil your request." Ria stated calmly.
Sindr managed to peel her eyes off the screen. They went to the Lex on Excalibur's hip. "Now? Just when we were getting along so well?" she asked with a smirk.
"That is not-" "Relax!" The Tenno began but was quickly interrupted. "I was joking! Do all Tenno get their humour removed?"
'Only in Excalibur…' Ria sighed inwardly. "I am here to escort you to a shower." She said calmly and bowed. "I apologize for putting you through such a-"
"And what is it with that constant apologizing? If this was a Grineer prison, you'd get a pitcher of protein-glucose mush and a beating a day, not flavoured food, a video screen and void-damned showers!" Sindr gasped in frustration.
"This is not a prison and you are not a prisoner." The Tenno stated calmly. "You are my guest and as such, it is my duty to take good care of you."
The Ginreer laughed. "This is getting ridiculous." She got up. "Let's just get this shower over with.
"I agree." Ria deadpanned. "Please go ahead. It's the last door on the left."
Sindr shot the Warframe a smile. "At least you don't go around turning your back on me…"
The Excalibur made place and Ria did her best not to stare too much as her guest passed her. She had been right: Sindr had a really nice ass. Too bad that she moved like a soldier. A bit of swing in that hip and… The Tenno drew sharp breath. Was this still jealousy? She surely hoped so.
The woman and the Warframe made their way to the bathroom. The door opened and Sindr raised her eyebrows. "There's no shower in there!"
"It is the cabin on the left."
"That? There is no showerhead or drain!"
"It is a sonic shower." Ria explained. "It uses short bursts of oscillating air to separate dirt from skin."
"Too fancy for water… seriously?"
"It is more refreshing than one would expect from a mere description. You will also find fresh clothes in there. Without long legs."
The Grineer shrugged and entered the bathroom. Suddenly she turned. "So, you coming or what?"
For a moment, Ria's mask broke. The Excalibur took a step back.
"Ha! Gotcha!" Sindr laughed and shut the door.
"Operator, this woman is obviously suffering from severe mental issues due to genetic decay, trauma, Orokin meddling and unknown factors." Sicarius said coldly "Her behaviour is erratic and unpredictable, she-"
"No, Sicarius, she is doing what every good sniper is supposed to do." Ria mused and stood the Excalibur next to the door. "Ever since she decided to keep on living, she has been testing the waters and put up hooks and traps. And now she has realized that sexual aggression might be a weak point." A minute passed. Ria closed her eyes. "Say… I never thought about it, but why are Grineer sexually active?"
"A good question, Operator. According to the old records-"
"Real records or the smut?"
"Real ones, Operator. According to them, it was attempted several times to remove the drive from Grineer stock. But it led to extremely inefficient workers. Ultimately, it was more efficient to give them one hour a day for recreation and work them harder the rest of the time. It is safe to assume that it's the same with modern Grineer. An active sex-drive increases aggression and competitiveness. Certain reports from Steel Meridian suggest that after successful missions -"
"I get the picture! Stop before I throw up in my hood!" The Tenno shuddered. The thought of a whole barrack of Grineer marines rutting… eww! "How is the foundry doing?"
"The item is close to completion, Operator.
"Hey!" Sindr's voice echoed from the bathroom. "Mind a question?"
Ria braced herself. "Of course not."
"What does one of your kind do with blue lipstick?"
The Tenno groaned. She hadn't cleared out her stuff.
"Do you paint a smile onto your head when you're happy?" Came the next question.
"Yes." Ria answered firmly.
Silence for a bit. "What?"
"Tenno always have a lipstick with us for that reason." The Tenno continued and she felt Excalibur buckle against her grasp. "I would also carry a bit of mascara to paint on eyes, but I ran out because I've been rolling them ever since you started talking."
The door opened. Sindry stood there, shiny clean and clad in fresh clothing, her orange eyes wide. "Void help me, there is an actual person inside?" she asked with mock surprise.
"It was my intention to give you a safe and welcoming environment." Ria said calmly, Excalibur's resistance slowly fading. "But it has become clear that you also require challenge to be satisfied."
"So that knob on your forehead isn't just for show?" The Grineer laughed. "Keep that up and we might end up friends. Maybe you get to shower with me too…"
"RAVENOUS LUST! I knew it, Operator!"
"Would you like to return to your room now or shall I leave you some more time to rummage through my cupboards?" Ria said, ignoring Sicarius whining.
"Well, I was thinking about shoving your toothbrush up somewhere…" Sindr mused "But then it hit me that this actually is your private bathroom. And nobody lets regular prisoners in their private bathroom. So I actually am your guest." She sighed. "Look, we both know that my people don't send rescue ships when they can make more of us. I guess I was just trying to find out how long I could make it. But then your friend showed up and now I'm here and…" She averted her gaze and seemed to push as hard as possible. "I'm grateful, ok? It's nice to be not-dead. Even if those drones did a lot of messed up shit to me, I guess being alive is better. So… thank you."
Ria grinned in her chair. She wasn't sure what gave her more tingles: Her plan paying off or getting positive social feedback. Probably the latter, seeing how rare it was.
"Well, that felt like passing a kidney stone. I hope you enjoy my dignity." The Grineer added and shook her head. "And how can I see you smirk without a face?"
The Warframe didn't move.
"What?"
"No hug?" Ria asked innocently.
"Can you go back to being a bore? Keep that shit up and I'll end up liking you."
The Tenno let out a giggle. She was making a friend! And all she had to do was find and rescues a heavily traumatized woman! Classic manouver!
"Operator! We have a problem!"
"If you say *ravenous lust* one more time!"
"No, Operator! It's the foundry! It's finished with the device and it activated!"
A rumble went through the ship and Sindr had to hold onto the side of the door. „What was that?"
Ria didn't need Sicarius' report. She knew this feeling. The feeling one had when a ghastly familiar was breathing down your neck. "The Void!"
Another rumble went through the ship and metal screamed. "Operator! Void fissures are opening all over the ship!"
"There is no way we can assemble a void key out of spare parts!" Ria yelled, her thoughts racing.
"It's not the device, it's coming from outside, Operator! It's like they are homing in on-"
"It's a fucking nametag!" Ria screamed.
"Hey, Tenno, you alright? Don't go all silent when shit goes down!" Sindr demanded from Excalibur.
"We are in danger!" The Warframe said coldly. "Please return to your-"
The lights went out as another rumbling screamed through the ship. All doors except the transference room shot open and emergency lights came on. "That one hit the engines, Operator, I -chr- have to cut power to several systems or we risk overheating the core!" Sicarius muttered "Oh, and there is an active fissure on the main deck! Several Drones have appeared!"
The Warframe started to walk. Sindr followed right behind. "Return to your room!" Excalibur ordered.
"Of course I'm gonna twiddle my thumb while hoping you don't fuck up whatever is happening right now!" Sindr growled.
The two reached the main room. A tear in the fabric of reality itself loomed in the centre and several Orokin drones were flying in circles, seemingly searching.
Ria pulled out her Lex. Two shots and one drone less.
Another came through the tear.
"No use, I have to close this manually!" Ria muttered.
"Operator, your Warframe is no e-"
"No, my hands!" The Tenno interrupted. She took a deep breath. Excalibur turned to Sindr. "Can you shoot with your left arm?"
"It's not like I have a choice!" The Grineer answered.
"Take this!" The Warframe offered the Lex. "And no matter what happens, keep shooting the drones!"
"Operator, this plan is extremely risky! You cannot trust this woman!"
Ria cut transference and jumped out of her chair. "I know, Sicarius! But I can trust her will to survive" She snarled as she began to run.
Sindr tried her best to ignore the Warframe going limp and focused on shooting. The recoil was insane for a handgun and she hadn't used one in ages. She was hitting pretty often, all things considered. Not that it mattered much. She had shot down two drones and they had been replaced already. She had one gun worth of bullets and even if she had more, reloading would prove difficult with only one arm and a gun she had never used before.
Something small ran past her. A child? Sindr remembered the Tenno's words. She shot another drone. She shot another drone when the child began shooting energy out of its hands, blasting some device on the table. She shot another drone when the child's fingers began to glow and she ignored the clicking of the empty Lex to shoot more drones when the rift closed under the child's will.
Moments later, Ria had blasted the last few drones. She turned to Sindr.
The Grineer stared at her. Then she looked at the Warframe and back again. "They are puppets…" she muttered. The Lex hit the ground. "They are puppets… and children hold the strings…"
Ria let out a sigh as Sindr's laughter echoed through the ship.
Yes, I can make fun of slashfics as much as I want, even IF I write one myself.