So, this took me much longer to write than I had hoped. Who knew that this scene would be extremely hard for me to write? Because it's taking me so long, I decided to split this chapter into two parts – so there will be one more chapter after this one. Surprise! I felt bad making you guys wait, so hopefully this scene tides you over while I work on the final stretch.
He was breathing, but the oxygen failed to do its job. No matter how fast he inhaled, his lungs were never satisfied. He knew he looked a right fool kneeling in the dirt, panting like a rabid dog, but he couldn't bring himself to care. Only one thing was clear in this moment, and that was that Sirius had royally messed up.
He knew the dangers of pursuing a case when he had Harry with him. He knew that Harry was prone to disobey orders to wait, his curiosity being just as prominent as his father's. Despite this, he had gone after Greyback without even stopping to think about the consequences, and now, poor sweet innocent Harry was going to have to suffer for it.
Best case scenario would be Orion and Walburga Black get ahold of him. They come up with a grand lie about how Sirius returned home to repent his ways, produced an heir before promptly dying, and raise Harry as their own. Harry would be subjected to the same harsh lessons Sirius was, quickly learning that concepts such as 'fun' and 'love' are not something he can expect from his new family. He would lose that joyful smile while he becomes molded into the perfect heir to the Black legacy, taking over the family's company once he comes of age.
Worst case scenario, it is discovered that Harry is not, in fact, Sirius' child. He is brought out for ransom and, despite the similar hair color, they realize he has no resemblance to anyone in the Black family. A quick DNA test* would be easy enough to perform, and when there are no similarities, they either dispose of him or sell him off to another country as a slave.
[*Yes, I am aware that Sirius and James are cousins and therefore there would be some "Black DNA" in Harry, but for the sake of the story (and Sirius' mental breakdown), let's just say there isn't.]
As much as Sirius hated the idea of Harry being forced to grow up in his parent's house, he hated the idea of Harry being abused or killed more. He would never know what became of Harry either. That was worse.
True, in twelve years there may become rumors surfacing of the young boy becoming engaged as the next heir, but Sirius wasn't so sure he would live long enough to hear about it. Harry was the only thing Sirius was living for, and now he was gone. Without Harry, he had nothing. Sirius had stupidly let his best friend's child slip into enemy hands, and he was powerless to do anything about it. No one could take on the Black empire: especially not alone.
He gasped around a cough, trying to calm his spasming chest enough to get some of that much needed oxygen. His vision was going blurry and there was a distant ringing in his head. He could feel his body shaking terribly, but try as he might he couldn't get himself to stop. This was all too much. It was too much.
"Shh, shh, shh." Warm hands gently caressed both sides of his face as someone knelt in front of him. "Hush now, child. Everything will be alright."
Sirius winced slightly as he took in a shaky breath, his lungs finally remembering their role, and focused his eyes on the woman in front of him. She was an older woman with curly brown hair that framed her face gracefully, and her warm caramel colored eyes shone with compassion. He glanced over her shoulder, noticing the young boy Greyback had tried abducting hovering nearby, toeing the ground in a bored gesture. While Sirius was glad that he was able to help prevent the woman's child from being stolen, he couldn't help the indignant tears that formed in his eyes as he remembered the price he had to pay.
"You can't know that," he whispered, dropping his gaze down to focus on the knitted pink sweater she had tied around her waist. He was grateful his trembling had finally subsided and that he was finally able to breathe again, but the woman's words did little to comfort him. She didn't realize just who had taken his godson and why. She probably thought a regular police search would be enough to find him. It wasn't her fault she was naïve, but her words were empty.
"Yes I can," she insisted, nudging his chin with her index finger to coax him into resuming eye contact. "My son has already gone after that man. He's a police detective and he noticed the altercation, following as soon as that man started fleeing the scene. He'll get your boy back. I promise."
A soft bubble of hope began forming in his chest as he stared into her gentle eyes. She felt familiar, as if she was his own mother, and he found it tempting to give in to her optimism. "Your son?"
The woman nodded, a tender smile on her lips. "Yes, Remus is very good at his job. I'm certain he'll get your boy back."
Gray eyes widened as he connected the dots, realizing just who this woman was and why she was familiar. There was no way it was a coincidence. Not with such an obscure name like that. "Remus Lupin?"
"You know my son?" she asked, an odd combination of curiosity and amusement on her face.
He paused a moment before dropping his gaze once more. "Our paths have crossed."
Mrs. Lupin hummed. "I take it you two aren't on friendly terms?"
When Sirius didn't reply, she continued. "Would you mind telling me what happened between the two of you?"
He worried his lower lip as he looked up at her. "I'd rather not." Remus already had to deal with his best friend harassing him about rejecting his soulmate, and Sirius didn't want to put parental pressure on him as well. After all, if Mrs. Lupin began hounding him, Remus just might give in to the pressure. Sirius wanted Remus to want him on his own accord, not because his mother made him.
"I understand," she said with a gentle smile. "Remus had actually-"
"Pops!"
At the sound of that cry, a jolt of electricity shot through Sirius' body, forcing him to spin out of Mrs. Lupin's arms faster than should be humanly possible. About twenty paces away, Harry was pattering along the grass as fast as his little legs could carry him towards Sirius, his chubby arms outstretched.
"Harry!" Sirius nearly choked out, fresh tears of relief welling in his eyes. Standing would take too much time, so he awkwardly scampered forward on all-fours, nearly stumbling several times as the two of them drew nearer.
The second Harry was close enough, Sirius pulled him in tightly, wrapping him securely against his chest. He nuzzled his nose into the boy's wild-as-ever hair, breathing in his unique childish scent of dirt, leaves, and bologna. A scent he was fearful he would never smell again, never before realizing just how much he needed it. Sirius rubbed his back in soothing circles while placing a dozen kisses on his forehead between whispered apologies and promises to never let that happen again.
"I'm alright, pops," Harry mumbled against his chest once the hug had extended beyond the point of a child's patience. "I'm fine, see? That mean guy didn't hurt me again."
Sirius pulled back slightly, while still keeping Harry at a close proximity. Remembering the wound Greyback had inflicted, he examined Harry's neck, pleased to see it wasn't deep at all and had already begun to scab. Sirius kissed the skin above the wound with a proclamation that it was all better now, causing Harry to roll his emerald eyes.
Unbidden memories of Greyback's fighting methods flashed through Sirius' mind. Even against seasoned fighters, the man was definitely a tough opponent. While he'd never seen Remus fight before, he could only imagine just how difficult it would be for him to take down Greyback. He couldn't let Remus take the fall: especially after what he did for Harry. Steeling his resolve, Sirius stood up, walking back to where Mrs. Lupin was still hovering a few paces back, tugging Harry along with him.
"Mrs. Lupin, might I ask you to watch Harry for a few minutes?"
Her eyes widened marginally in surprise before she nodded. "Certainly, but what for?"
"I need to make sure Remus is alright," he said quickly before kneeling in front of Harry. "You stay with Mrs. Lupin, alright? Don't go wandering off again."
"Okay, pops," Harry replied, his tone conveying annoyance.
The other little boy, with tawny curls and hazel eyes, stepped up beside Harry and waved enthusiastically. "Hi, Harry. I'm Teddy. You wanna see my Pokémon cards?"
Harry shrugged, annoyance forgotten. "Sure!"
"I have a holographic Blastoise!"
"Ooh! Is it a limited edition, too?"
Sirius gave Hope a quick smile before dashing to the bush he had kicked his firearm into, scouring under the branches until his fingers found the gun. He pulled it out while only managing to get two scratches on his forearm and then ran in the direction of the parking lot he suspected Greyback had fled to. The lot on the northeast section was far less used than the western one and usually found more untoward activities.
Sure enough, as he neared the lot, he could make out the sounds of a scuffle. Once Sirius was through the greenery and found purchase on the cement, he saw Greyback had pinned Remus up against the side of a car that had the boot open. The larger man was attempting to tie a rope around Remus' arms, muttering about the good price a pretty boy like him could fetch.
Without bothering to announce his presence, Sirius fired two shots at Greyback. The first into his right shoulder blade, and the second in the back of his left calf. As Greyback flinched from the impact, a roar escaping his lips, Sirius rushed forward, twisting Greyback's right arm behind his back as he pressed him against the car, pushing the gun tip firmly into the underside of the man's chin.
"If you even bother trying to resist arrest," Sirius growled, his stormy eyes narrowed in hatred, "I will personally ensure my father is unable to rescue you from prison. After all, what purpose would he have of a corpse?"
Greyback snarled at Sirius in response but didn't resist as Remus cuffed him. Moments after he was bound, two squad cars pulled up, stopping on either side of the beat up car.
Remus rolled his eyes as he marched Greyback towards Alice who had just opened up the back door. "Better late than never I suppose."
"Sorry," Alice replied sheepishly as she closed the door behind Greyback. "We got waylaid by a drunk driver."
"Really? A drunk driver on a Thursday morning?"
"That's what I said," the other officer, a shorter man with ebony skin and thick curly hair quipped, a lopsided grin on his face.
Sirius and Remus both recorded their statements separately to each officer, Sirius ensuring to tell Officer Thomas about other illicit activities he was aware Greyback had participated in, with particular influence on his hit man position amongst his father's ranks.
Remus was finishing up with Alice as Officer Thomas called a towing service to impound Greyback's vehicle. Seeing that he was no longer necessary, Sirius turned around, making his way back to where he had left Harry with Mrs. Lupin. There had been far too much drama for his liking before noon, and Sirius was ready to call this a day. He doubted that McGonagall would be terribly upset if he chose not to go in to work; certainly having your godson abducted was a good enough excuse.
He took a deep breath, the cool air chilling his throat as it went down in a calming way. This park had always been a quiet sanctuary for Sirius, bringing back fond memories of youthful summers with his best friend. He and James would spend hours goofing off when they were younger. They climbed trees, hid in bushes, jumped off oversized rocks, and occasionally used the playground equipment like normal children. He hoped that today wouldn't sully those memories, grateful that this altercation at least had a happy ending.
"Sirius, hold on."
He was about halfway to his destination when he felt a warm hand slip around his wrist, tugging him back gently. Sirius turned around to see Remus standing there, a hesitant expression on his face. His pride tempted him to shove Remus' hand away and storm back to collect his godson and leave, but the sorrow showing in those amber eyes nulled any intent he had to listen to his pride. Damn, he was so weak.
"What is it, Remus?" he asked, voice tired.
"I – um," Remus paused, biting his lip as he processed what he wanted to say. "I'm sorry."
Sirius dropped his gaze, focusing on the hand that was still wrapped around his wrist.
"I was a real arse, Sirius. I shouldn't have said all that to you, and I'm really sorry."
He shook his head. "I don't need an apology."
"Regardless, I owe it to you." A fiery determination was evident in his amber eyes as he tightened his grip ever so slightly. "You are my soulmate and I treated you horribly. I was completely out of line, and I am so, so sorry."
Sirius took in a deep breath, closing his eyes for a long moment as he dug up the argument he had convinced himself was true over the past couple weeks. "We aren't soulmates, Remus."
Remus paused, his mouth forming a perfect 'o'. "What – what do you mean we aren't soulmates? Of course we are." He shook his head in disbelief, tawny locks swaying. "We have the right words."
"It isn't unheard of for multiple couples to have the same words," he countered. "It's rare, but it does happen."
"But that isn't the case with us! We are soulmates, Sirius. How can you say we're not?"
"You've seen soulmates meet, haven't you?" He pinched his brows together as he tilted his head to the side in a questioning gesture. "You've seen their relationship grow, yes?"
"Well, of course-"
"So then you know that it is always love at first sight," Sirius stated. "When they meet, there is an immediate connection. A closeness that doesn't happen with anyone else. Even if they aren't romantically available at the time, they accept each other and want to know one another immediately."
"That's-"
"They don't push each other away," he continued as if Remus hadn't spoken. "They don't run from their soulmate, avoid their soulmate, or accuse their soulmate of crimes they never committed."
"Sirius," Remus whispered, rubbing circles onto Sirius' wrist with the pad of his thumb. "Sirius, I made a mistake. I was wrong. Please-"
He shook his head, trying to will himself to remain strong despite the tears that wanted to fall and his wall that begged to crumble. This is the answer he came up with and he needed to stick to it. As foolish as he knew he was being, at least the idea that they had the same words as another couple meant that he hadn't been rejected by his soulmate, and his heart wasn't ready for any more rejection. "It's fine. I've accepted it. We just need to move on from here. Put this whole mess behind us and wait until we meet our true soulmates."
"But you are my true soulmate, Sirius."
Remus never gave him a chance to reply. Without hesitation, he leaned forward, pressing their lips together in a tender kiss. Sirius brought his free hand up to Remus' chest to push the taller man off, but as long fingers entwined themselves into his black tresses, all arguments rapidly evaporated from his mind. How could anyone's fingers feel this good? They stroked and scratched with just the right pressure, sending pleasant tingles down Sirius' spine. He was certain he would die if Remus ever stopped playing with his hair.
Sirius grabbed a fistful of Remus' incredibly soft dark red cardigan as he pulled the man closer, moving his lips in tandem with Remus'. The kiss was gentle but filled with magic, communicating unspoken promises between them. The hand that had been grabbing Sirius' wrist slowly slid up his arm, firmly squeezing his shoulder as Sirius wrapped his other arm around Remus' waist, pulling him closer so only a few inches separated their bodies.
Remus broke the kiss first, resting their foreheads together as he stared affectionately into Sirius' eyes. Sirius maintained eye contact, working hard to get his rapid breathing under control.
"You can't tell me that didn't feel right to you." Remus nuzzled his nose lightly. "We are meant to be together, Sirius."
Sirius licked his lips, savoring the taste of Remus' raspberry lip balm that had rubbed onto his own mouth. "Is this real?" he whispered, his mind insisting that he had somehow fallen asleep during their conversation.
Remus chuckled softly before kissing the corners Sirius' mouth. "This is very real. I want to be with you, if you'll still have me."
Oh, how much Sirius wanted to be with him. There were no words to express his need for the other man. Throwing caution to the wind, he chose to believe Remus' words and pulled him back in for another kiss. If he thought the first kiss was good, their second one was awesome. All of Sirius' insecurities fluttered away, allowing him to melt into Remus' arms as Remus held him close.
Remus' lips felt better than anything Sirius had ever experienced before, and the odd combination of raspberry and chocolate croissant breath was strangely intoxicating. He shifted his head to the other side, nuzzling Remus' nose as they changed angles. In this moment he knew that kissing Remus was something he could never tire from. Those slender fingers were working circles along his scalp, no doubt completely messing up his hair, and Remus' other hand had somehow found it's way under Sirius' jacket, grasping at the thin t-shirt material underneath.
Sirius trailed his hand up Remus' chest before wrapping it around the back of his neck, lightly toying with the soft tawny curls at the base of his scalp. He heard a moan but, if asked, he couldn't tell which of them it came from. His mind was swirling in a thick fog of euphoria. Just remembering to pull apart for breath every few minutes was hard enough. He never wanted this moment to end.
After what felt like both an eternity and only a few seconds, Remus pulled away causing an involuntary whimper to escape Sirius' mouth. With a breathy chuckle, Remus placed a peck on Sirius' swollen lower lip before bringing their foreheads together again. Their noses pressed gently together and Remus closed his eyes, a smile seemingly permanently affixed to his face.
From this close, it was easy to make out just how many adorable freckles covered Remus' face. They weren't much darker than his skin, but they were numerous, and Sirius wondered if he could find constellations if he searched hard enough. There was a deep flush that spread from Remus' cheeks to below the collar of his cardigan, and he was pleased to see that Remus was just as out of breath as he was. Sirius brought his hand towards the side of Remus' neck, gently stroking his skin. There was a rapid thrumming below his thumb that showed just how fast Remus' heart was beating.
A polite cough brought the two men back to reality. Remus opened his eyes and took a single step back, retracting the hand that had been in Sirius' hair much to Sirius' dismay. Remus kept his other arm wrapped around Sirius, albeit dropping his hand to a more appropriate waist level, as he turned towards the newcomers.
Mrs. Lupin had a knowing smile as she approached, ushering the youngsters in front of her. "It's good to see you two have made up."
Remus' blush increased as he ducked his head shyly.
Harry looked between Remus and Sirius with his curious green eyes. "Is he going to be my new dad?" he asked pointing towards the brown haired man.
Teddy's hazel eyes widened in delight. "Does that mean that Harry gets to be my brother? Are you two really going to get married?"
"Teddy!" Remus scolded lightly. "What did I tell you about asking inappropriate questions?"
"Sorry, daddy."
Mrs. Lupin gracefully redirected the conversation out of the hands of five-year-olds by offering to take the two boys to her home for a sleepover, much to Harry and Teddy's delight. While hesitant, Sirius agreed, feeling he could trust Mrs. Lupin with his godson. She was his soulmate's mother after all, so she couldn't be too bad. Mrs. Lupin insisted the boys would be fine, urging Remus and Sirius to talk, saying they needed to spend some time alone together: especially after what they had endured today.
They waved goodbye to the car as Mrs. Lupin drove away. Once the taillights disappeared, Remus turned to look at Sirius, a soft smile still on his face. "So, mine or yours?"
Sirius' eyes widened in surprise. "W-what?"
"Should we go to mine or yours? You know, to talk?" Remus furrowed his eyebrows, munching on the inside of his lip. "I don't mean to imply that we're going to have sex. I guess I realize that did come off that way. Would you, um, feel more comfortable at a café then? Maybe grab some lunch?"
It was now Sirius' turn to blush. He admittedly had thought Remus was propositioning him. While Sirius knew that this was the man he was meant to be with, after one makeup session and five weeks of avoiding each other, he didn't feel like they were yet ready for that kind of commitment. It would feel amazing, he was sure, but his heart wasn't yet ready for that level of intimacy. If this did turn out to be a one-off, the memory of a single great night would make it ache all the more.
"Are you hungry?" Remus hedged when Sirius didn't reply.
He shook his head. "Tea would be nice though." Sirius was more keen on being somewhere private as opposed to something public like a café, but he was hesitant to invite Remus into his home. Just in case. "How about yours? You lead the way and I'll follow on my bike?"
Remus nodded, his smile brightening once more. "Sounds like a plan."
Word Count:3788
So that's the end of chapter 6. There will be one more chapter after this, which hopefully won't be as taxing on me as this chapter was. Although, as a forewarning, I have family coming in this Friday so I won't really be able to start working again until Monday, so please bare with me. But on the bright side, you got to see the two of them finally get together! Huzzah for puppy love!