Scattered

"Kagome, are we still talking about this?" Inuyasha frowned as he dried the last bowl and stacked it with the others. Kagome still wasn't meeting his eyes as she gripped her arms, crossed over her chest.

"I just don't understand why you—how you could just change your mind like that," Kagome said, her volume raising with every word, "The last time we talked about this—hell, yesterday—you seemed fine. You seemed to like the idea of us having kids, so how could you suddenly—"

"I HAD A REALITY CHECK!" Inuyasha shouted over her. The dog began to bark at the sudden escalated noise, but the fox sitting beside her clamped his hands around her muzzle. Inuyasha swallowed when her mouth shut, and she gave him a hurt expression, this time, making eye contact. He put his hands on his hips, this time it was him taking his dark eyes away from hers. He took a deep breath before continuing on.

"What more do you need to know, hm? Any kid we have is gonna…well fuck it, I ain't puttin' another kid in that kind of situation. Do you realize what a shit excuse for a dad that would make me? A man, a demon, whatever. It ain't gonna happen." Inuyasha pointed to Kagome.

"Wait, now. The first time we ever talked about this crap, you even said you were fine with us just being the two, why'd you change your mind?"

"Because you said you wanted to be a father, and I believed you! I've gone eight—nine months believing you wanted what I wanted and you never said otherwise, so what the hell was I supposed to think?" her voice cracked, and she swallowed thickly. Inuyasha pinched his eyes shut. He couldn't handle tears, not right now. He cared about this woman so much, and when she cried—when he made her cry—dammit. It tugged on his heartstrings even harder when his emotions were right out on the surface on these moonless nights.

"You can't just change the—"

"I DIDN'T CHA—"

"DON'T yell at Kagome!"

The fox stood defensively in front of Kagome, glaring up at the temporarily human man. Inuyasha's glare settled on the boy and he took a deep breath through his nose.

"Shippo, stay out of this," Inuyasha ordered. The boy's lip curled defiantly.

"Not if you're going to yell." Shippo shook his head. Inuyasha glanced back up to Kagome, whose attention was directed down to Shippo, her expression showing concern for the little demon. Inuyasha closed his eyes and rocked back on his heels.

"That wasn't yell—"

"Shippo, please." Kagome cut her husband off. She crouched a little further down to whisper to the boy.

"We didn't mean to argue right in front of you. I'm sorry." Shippo's expression scrunched, and he turned up to Kagome.

"You're not the one that should apologize. He's the one that got all pissy and—"

"Pissy. Right. Shippo, you had better shut your face, because…" Inuyasha ran his hands through his hair.

"Fuck it. I'm out of here." Inuyasha stomped off for the door, sliding it open as feet trotted up behind him. He tried to shut the door behind him, but Kagome held it open.

"Inuyasha, wait, please," she plead as he let go of the door and started walking.

"I'll be back, I just need some air," he said to the darkness in front of him.

"Inuyasha please, come back inside! It's freezing out. I didn't mean for this to turn into—Inuyasha wait!" She could barely see her husband's form shrinking away from her in the starlight. She was so stupid, she had dashed out barefoot onto the icy ground. She would never catch him at this rate. He was too used to walking around barefoot. Why was it like this so often?

"Inuyasha, Osuwari," she called. She heard the familiar thud and she sighed, darting in the direction the dark shape had fallen. She came up beside her husband with an apology on her lips, waiting for him to rise so that she would have his attention, but…seconds ticked by, and he never moved a muscle.

"Inuyasha?"

The sound of his weak groan threw her into panic. She realized that she had made a terrible mistake. She grabbed him under the arms and rolled him onto his side. She could barely make out his face for the darkness and the streams of black covering his nose and mouth. The ground was frozen solid. He was weak as a human. She was so stupid.

He opened his eyes wide as she lifted him into a seated position. He could barely make out what she was saying though the scratchy sound of her voice. A thousand apologies spewed from her as they made their way into the light of the house. He watched her scramble around for a clean rag and water. He said nothing as he sat there, half wondering what had happened, half knowing that he was pissed off. He looked over at Shippo and the dog, Shippo giving him a frightened look before averting his gaze away from the dark-eyed man, dripping with fresh blood.

He winced when his wife dabbed at the cut over his forehead, he didn't even see her come up next to him. His eyes shot to the face of his wife as she wrung the now red cloth and rewet it. He couldn't even feel the entire left side of his face at that point, just the sharpness in his nose and mouth.

"Oh god," she whispered as he flinched away when she touched the cloth to the bridge of his nose. His nose was unmistakably broken. The cuts she had been cleaning over his brow and split lip were minor in comparison to how his nose looked. His bones were always self setting, but the pain he mist be in right now…

She swallowed thickly when she noticed Inuyasha's expression. His brow and cheek were beginning to swell, but his expression was so angry. And rightfully so. She had fucked up royally, and he looked to be doing everything in his power to recognize this as unintentional. She had no idea this would happen. She had done this to her husband. Her eyes began to mist up, but she choked back her tears, gently holding his face still while she dabbed the blood away.

"Shippo, throw this out, and refill it for me," she said to the little fox. Shippo said nothing as he did as he was told. He wasn't stupid enough to intervene in the tense aura between the couple. Kagome noticed the darkening stains on Inuyasha's knees and gently grasped Inuyasha's wrists to turn over his hands. Inuyasha followed her gaze, and Kagome noted that his good eye widened at the sight of his bloody palms. He must not have felt them. Kagome noted how deeply a few stones and debris were embedded. She instructed Shippo to get and additional bowl and her tweezers, so that she could begin to scrub away anything his skin might try to heal over come morning.

She plucked away at the rocks and twigs that were stuck in his right hand, causing more blood to ooze out. She dropped each foreign body into the second, waterless bowl. She cleaned the hand of blood, the skin now looking something akin to hamburger meat and wrapped it in the bandages Shippo had foresight to set beside her. As she moved onto the second hand, which wasn't as bad off, she went to drop a pebble into the bowl when a bandaged hand reached down and grabbed it away from her. Kagome looked up to see Inuyasha moving his tongue under his lips. He spit something into the bowl and set it back down with a gnarled look of disgust on his beat-up face.

Kagome hadn't started crying yet, but she lost it when she saw the two bloodied human teeth setting in the bottom of the bowl.

"I'm sorry Inuyasha!" She cried.

"I n-n-never th-thought about i-it. I just w-went on instinct and," she sobbed, "it's only s-s-supposed t-t-to work on dem-m-mons so I d-don't even know wh-why it—"paused to wipe her tears.

"I'm not totally human." Inuyasha's voice was gruff, but he couldn't stand to see her cry right in front of him like this. He was angry because he was hurt, but…it wasn't like she intentionally beat him up or something. He could handle the command in his regular body, but tonight—

"Wh-what? No, I-I d-d-don't feel a bit of Youki from you and y-y-your hair and your strength—"

"Yeah, I look and feel it for the most part, but there's somethin' inside hanyou to get our powers goin' back in the mornin'. It's just real deep down that we can't get to." Inuyasha looked down at his bandaged hand. His claws were gone, but there was something he noticed, looking in a mirror when he was very young.

"Have you ever seen my eyes on the first night?"

Kagome sobbed out a quiet 'whuh?' as she brought her face away from her hands. Her eyes were so blurry she could barely tell Inuyasha had eyes.

"The little black spots ain't round. That's how you know I ain't a normal human." That's all he could figure. The beads weren't supposed to work on humans. They must be able to pick up on that deeply embedded kernel of Youki, and react just the same as when his form was it's usual strength, despite how frail his body became.

"I don't underst—"

"Well, it don't matter if you do or don't. Nothin' to do now." He held up his left hand to his wife.

"Stop crying, idiot. I ain't mad just hurry up and patch me up." He lied about being mad, but he would rather forget about this whole incident sooner rather than later. Kagome nodded, though she still wanted to cry. She spent a minute wiping her eyes and breathing, working on being able to see the debris to pick out of her husband's hand before she went to work.

"The spell. It's always that forceful, isn't it?" Kagome asked as she began wrapping Inuyasha's left hand.

"I can handle it," he muttered.

"That's not what I asked…Though I suppose it answers my question too," Kagome shook her head as she continued with, "if it hurts when I do it, you would tell me, wouldn't you?" Kagome paused as she tucked the final wrap of bandage around Inuyasha's hand. There was a good three seconds of absolute silence, no animal calls, no insects, not a breath between the pair, before Inuyasha answered.

"I'd tell ya. You've heard me complain about it before." Inuyasha tried to shrug, but Kagome's eyes slammed shut.

"But I still use—"

"I hate it when you do it like a hundred times in a row, otherwise it feels like nothin'."

"Inuyasha. Hey, come on." Shippo patted Inuyasha's arm. Inuyasha jolted awake. Kagome had told Shippo to keep Inuyasha awake for a few hours in case she had fallen asleep. She told him that if Inuyasha had a concussion, it would be bad to let him sleep for a while. Shippo didn't know how long a while she meant, but Inuyasha seemed very sleepy, even though he could usually stay up on these nights. Morning would arrive soon, but Shippo wanted to make sure Inuyasha wouldn't die in his sleep. He didn't really understand what a concussion was, but he was trying to be safe and follow Kagome's vague instructions until the morning, when any damaged tissue would heal at once.

"I'm up," Inuyasha said with a sigh. He really had been feeling sleepy that night, his head was aching terribly too. Kagome was probably onto something with that talk of brain injury. Inuyasha blinked his eyes open and stood up to fight sleep. He scanned the room to find his wife curled up on the hard floor, asleep. She could have at least slept on the bed, but she seemed to have been trying to make sure he stayed awake. He walked over to her sleeping form, thanking the fox for covering her and encouraging the dog to curl up beside her. The ground outside was frozen enough to fuck up his face, and it wasn't a whole lot warmer in the house. He threw another log onto the fire, looking back at his wife as she nearly stirred from the crackling sound. His heart sank now that he was finally close enough to see the light catching the tearstains down her cheeks.

"Damn," he muttered, coming back to sit against the wall.

"When did she start crying again?" Inuyasha asked of the fox. He watched the kit's shoulders fall.

"The second she laid down. I could smell it from here."

Inuyasha nodded, staring into the fire as red lines climbed the grains in the wood. Shippo approached Inuyasha once again, hands folded before him.

"Listen Inuyasha. I'm sorry. I shouldn't've gotten involved."

Inuyasha scoffed.

"Damn right you shouldn't have…" Inuyasha watched Shippo frown at him before he came to sit beside Inuyasha.

"I just…I don't get why you're so mad about letting Kagome have a baby. She seems to really—"

"Kid, you're entering dangerous territory. Thought you said you would stay out of it…" Inuyasha sighed. He brushed his hair off his forehead with his hand, forgetting how sore both forehead and palm were.

"It wouldn't be lettin' Kagome have a baby, anyway. I would still have to father the kid."

"Kagome would make a good mom even if you were the worst dad on the planet," Shippo said, his tone bitter.

"It's something you do when you're married, have kids, isn't it?" Shippo continued. "So why did you even marry her if you didn't want to have kids with her. Seems kinda stupid to me."

Inuyasha growled.

"I married her because I wanted to live together with her, you don't have to have kids just because you're…Dammit Shippo," Inuyasha rocked forward to lean his arms on his knees and look at the kid glaring up at him, continuing on, "I know Kagome would make a good mom. I know she deserves to have a family like she wants but…you're too young to understand this, why the hell am I…" Inuyasha took a deep breath.

"You'll be old enough in a few years so just take my advice, okay? I know you've had lots of little girlfriends over the years, but when you're older, don't ever get a human girl pregnant, you hear me? Because this," he patted his chest, "is what you'll get. They'll get shit on and screwed over by the entire fucking world and the reason I don't want kids is because I know what that's like." Inuyasha's head was beginning to throb as he spoke.

"Then I'll protect them from all that," Shippo said after a second of thought.

Inuyasha shot a dubious look in the kit's direction.

"And how do you plan on doing that?"

The eleven-year-old frowned, leaning forward to hold his ankles.

"I don't really know. But I'll definitely stick around for them. I'll be there if they need advice, or beat up anyone that bullies them…" the boy trailed off.

"…I know that your dad died before you can remember, but if he was around, I think he would have protected you too. My dad was always saying—"

"Your dad died too, Shippo. What then?"

Shippo glared defiantly up at Inuyasha. Then his glare faded. Inuyasha was getting defensive because the boy brought up a sore subject, and turning it around on Shippo was just the next course of action.

"I'm going to be stronger than my dad. He didn't have the training I'm getting, so by the time I have kids, whether their mom is human or demon, I definitely won't die." Shippo smirked.

"I'm going to become the strongest, wisest fox demon that ever lived, just you wait. I'm going to have kids that can look up to me, and anyone that messes with them will regret it. I just know it."

Inuyasha scoffed. That somehow brought a smile to his lips.

"Sure you are, brat." Inuyasha dropped his hand overtop the kit's head. He stared back out into the fire. He was silently glad that they got off the subject of his own heirs as he felt the effects of the sun beginning to crest the horizon. Across the way, he saw movement as his eyesight started to sharpen. Kagome was beginning to stir with the sudden influx of youki from Inuyasha's body. Inuyasha felt the tingle of some of his power taking focus on the wounds across his face and hands, starting to heal them. Kagome sat up rubbing her eyes and brushing the dried tears from her cheeks.

"Morning," Inuyasha called.

Kagome merely nodded and silently walked over to Inuyasha to examine his face.

"Don't worry about that, nose ain't gonna be crooked by lunchtime."

Kagome sighed.

"Shippo, go on ahead, we'll catch up," Kagome said, rubbing Aki's belly. Shippo gave a curious look to Inuyasha before the boy called Aki over and left through the door. Inuyasha rolled his eyes as Kagome approached him. He thought she was just going to be checking on his healing process before he got a good look at her face. Her brows were knit in a quiet sort of anger. What was she angry for?

Inuyasha unconsciously took a step back, finding himself up against a wall. Kagome was in front of him instantly. Inuyasha lifted himself to his full height, away from her hands as she cupped his cheeks. Her eyes scanned his face as she gently tilted it from side to side.

"Kagome what—I"

She dropped her hands, grasping his wrists and looking over his bandaged palms. She released his hands and looked back up to him, brown catching gold. She looked to be thinking about something. Her gaze dropped once more, her hands resting on his shoulders. Inuyasha was bewildered about what the hell she was doing, but he stayed quiet as he observed his wife's strange behavior. Her hands slid down from his shoulders to his collarbone, where the folds of his clothing met the kotodama necklace.

She wrapped her hands around the beads. Inuyasha felt his hairs rising on end with a sort of static electricity feeling at his chest. Kagome tightened her hold on the beads…and tugged.

Dozens of sharp sounds brought Inuyasha's ears back against his head as the beads scattered to the floor around him. Indigo and ivory tumbled in every which way before their echoes faded into silence. Inuyasha just stood, frozen, staring at his wife. What the hell?

"There," Kagome said, taking a step back from her husband. Her decision was much more final that if she had simply removed the necklace whole from his throat. Never again would she say the command in anger or negligence. She gave herself a satisfied nod. She would sweep the beads out the door when she got home, but for now, she needed to get into the village.

"Let's go," she said, turning to walk to the door. Inuyasha took slow steps to follow. He got to the door then turned back to look into the house. His eyes scanned the floor, staring…he didn't know how to feel about this. He closed the door behind himself, touching his fingertips to his chest as he walked behind his wife. Sure, they were just beads. They had caused him a lot of annoyance in their time around his neck but…did Kagome know how that familiar weight felt around his neck? She couldn't have possibly known the hours he spent staring from the bottom of that well, rolling those beads between his fingers, his thickest tie to the brave, gentle, beautiful girl just on the other side of the well…

This was stupid. The beads were thrown about his neck by Kaede, Kagome just controlled the spell. They weren't even hers, so why had he spent so much time…he had Kagome with him now, so why should he hold onto something like that. Something that…

It was after dark again when Kagome climbed onto Inuyasha's back. She was glad to see that his nose had healed and his two teeth had regrown over the course of the day, but she didn't inspect her husband too closely. She hadn't worked late, technically, but she wondered when the sun was going to start setting later. Winter sure seemed to last a long time in this world. A world without hot baths, hot cocoa, fried chicken…well, it was her decision to make.

She wrapped her arms around her husband's neck. She didn't expect her arms to brush up against something hard and cold. Hard…and cold..?

"What? Did…did you restring the beads?" she heard her husband huff.

"Why?" She asked, genuinely confused. He hated that necklace, didn't he? She had abused her power so awfully over the years, and only realized it when she had seriously injured her beloved husband. Did he seriously take the time to collect all the beads from the floor and restring them?

"Why not? Feels weird not wearing them when I spend something like five years straight having 'em on." His response was very blasé and Kagome hugged her husband tighter.

"I'm sorry for ever using that stupid spell on you, Inuyasha, but I don't really feel attached to—"

"Eh? Don't worry about it. I just like having 'em on. Besides, I can take them off whenever now, so it's not like you run the risk of ever using the word without meaning to."

Kagome frowned. Was that really the case?

...

Off of Hiatus to give you guys a short chapter. It's three AM again. Back on schedule. Unedited, will return to edit later.