I have decided to revamp this a bit in response to a review from the lovely Lucy on SessxRin Drabbles. She wants longer chapters and more of how they fell in love. It kind of happened in this story, so instead of trying to piece those interactions together, I'm going to add and update this. There are new scenes from when Rin was younger reflecting their relationship but the overall plot will be the same.

Rin winced in pain as she finished packing the rest of the small items she needed for her journey. Herbs, dried meat, more bandages for her battered stomach. She had done her best to make a poultice with the herbs Jinenji had gathered for her to heal the wounds on her stomach. Large claw-marks ripped across her taught stomach. They were deep and still oozing slightly. She wore a different Kimono today reflecting the warmer weather. It was mostly dark brown with some light green stripes along the base. Her hikama were short, revealing her legs up to her thighs. She had wrapped her hands, wrist and feet in light white cloth, readying for her journey. She had only a few more things to pack and two letters to write. One for Kaede-sama and one for Sesshomaru-sama, should he come. She rolled her eyes, he had been away for a year, ever since something changed between them, ever since…well she didn't want to think about the night of the full moon last year. She closed her eyes shaking the thoughts from her head, Kohaku was in danger, if she didn't hurry he would die.

To Kaede,

Thank you for everything, I am grown now. I want to see the world and find my place in it. I will come visit soon.

Love,

Rin

Onegai, please give this letter to Sesshomaru Sama. Tell him to let me go.

Long ago, she had begun to wonder why he still visited. It wasn't that she didn't want him to, it was like they were trapped between being friends and an overbearing father and something else neither one of them was ready to admit. She hoped that Kaede would believe it, and not become suspicious. Rin had already sworn Jinenji to silence when she asked for help with her wounds. Jinenji's herbs were able to ensure that she not only heal, but that Inuyasha with his pesky sense of smell would be none the wiser. It was made from a select group of herbs known to effect even full yokai. Jinenji's mother made it to protect him when he was a child. Rin convinced him to make several pouches for her so that she would be prepared should he find her. He had a very bad habit, of forgetting that Rin was no longer a little girl that needed her hand held.

Rin picked up the leather pouch with the powder and carefully poured it into five smaller pouches. Kagome-sama called them Ziploc bags. She, Shippo and Kohaku liked to use them for water fights. The pouches were made to break as soon as they hit their target and the fine sand-like green powder would temporarily blind the eyes of any yokai and blight their sense of smell. This powder was laced into the bandages on her stomach ensuring that Inuyasha would not smell the injuries. Finally, after packing dried fruits, and finding a water bottle, Rin was ready to go. It was the middle of the night, she didn't want to say goodbye or answer questions, she had to go now, or it would be too late.

Rin tiptoed out the front of her hut, the mud-floor was dusty from days of neglect. She hated cleaning and Kaede-sama knew it. Rin snuck silently on barefeet to Kaede's sleeping mat. The old Miko snored as she slept. She was wrapped in a light sheet that Rin had given her. One of the many presents she received from Sesshomaru-sama over the years. She said a short prayer for the Shrine Maiden who had cared for her as Sesshomaru had requested. As she did, Rin allowed her mind to drift back to those first days in the village. When he left her in the village.

It was the first time that Sesshomaru had offered her his hand. In the past he had raged at Kohaku in particular that his hand was meant for carrying a sword not for carrying children. She was sitting on a fence watching other children play in the distance. One of them she knew was a little girl named Satsu. She had her hair tied tightly into two little pony tails. She ran around in a ratty pink kimono that had holes in it. Rin looked down at her own, the yellow and orange patched material now came up to her knees where it used to hang down to her ankles. The little girl ran over to Rin, "hello, I'm Satsu, it's nice to meet you!"

Rin waved with her mouth closed tight.

"Do you want to come play with us? We're playing hide and seek!"

Rin shook her head, she knew that Sesshomaru-sama would tell them it was time to leave soon. She felt claws tickle her tiny fingers. "Sesshoumaru-sama why haven't we left?" Naraku was defeated, Sesshomaru-sama delivered the final blow to the tree carved face. Inuyasha and Kagome had not returned. She felt the hand tug slightly, indicating they should begin walking. Instead of moving away from the village, they walked closer to it. Rin felt a rush of panic grip her. She had heard whispering from Kaede to the monk and the slayer called Sango, that it wasn't proper for her to continue following Sesshomaru around. What was he doing?

He remained quiet at first. His feet silently padded down the dirt path, "Rin, you will stay here for a while." The words were spoken with ease, but slammed her heart like a knife.

"What? I want to stay with you!" His words had cut her, her stomach fell into her feet, she stopped following him. She attempted to dig her feet into the dirt path, blistering her heals, but his firm hand did not let go. She was just a child she could not say no to him or fight back. Rin slapped at his hand, she tried to pull it free, "no, no, no! I won't go, I won't go! Let go of me!" Ruthlessly she tried to kick at his shins, but her feet did nothing more but repay her with aching toes.

Jaken stood behind her and when she began to assault Sesshomaru-sama the squirming frog screamed, "Rin, do not show such disrespect for Sesshomaru-sama."

"Shut up toad! Let me go." She tried one more time to escape, but this time Sesshomaru-sama stopped and let go of her hand.

His eyes were glowing golden, and he released a low growl. "Rin." The word sounded wrong when said it, so unlike how she was used to hearing his voice. She didn't know at the time, but she was sure it was doubt. Doubt that he was making the right choice.

"Yes?" Her voice trembled, she looked at her feet and wiggled them in the dirt. She didn't want to leave him. He was the first to show kindness to her after her family was killed by night robbers, the first to care for her, the first to comfort her. He even made a new Kimono for her when she traveled with him. Tears streamed from her small cheeks and fell on the to the ground. They carved small rivers in the dirt on her face.

"Rin," was that regret in his voice, he knelt down to be on her level, and gently placed one clawed finger under her chin to lift her face. "I will come back to check on you."

"No…" She sobbed and covered her face with her hands. Her shoulders were shaking so hard she could barely stand, she could hardly catch her breath. She was terrified. This village, this place, she had only been there a few days. Kaede-sama was nice enough, so were the others she had met, but this, she had not planned for.

Behind her she heard Jaken whimper, "Sesshomaru-sama will not cry, he is too proud, so this Jaken must." Tears flowed from his eyes like a waterfall, splattering the dirt.

"Shut-up Jaken," Sesshomaru growled. "Rin, when you stay with me, there is danger." He paused, Rin was too young at the time to understand that he was on the verge of sorrow himself. "When you are older, when you have had the chance to understand being human, you will decide."

"Decide what?" She quivered. She knew now what that meant, when she was old enough to decide whether to join him or not, but whenever they talked about it, he seemed to have his own opinion. Eventually Rin became of the opinion that she would find her own place regardless of what he wanted, which turned into an even bigger yelling match between the two about whether or not she was allowed to leave the village alone.

Sesshomaru didn't answer, he made to stand. Before his knee could lift from the ground she grabbed the metal armor that protruded around his chest, her small face bringing his closer to hers, "will you hug me good-bye?"

Jaken's shrieked pierced the background. "Rin! Such rudeness! Of course, Sesshomaru-sama would never hug a human, who's filth…" Jaken fell to the ground squealing in pain from Sesshomaru's whip. His mouth flopped open, his tongue ejected in shock and the scene unfolded in front of his eyes.

Sesshomaru wrapped his arms around Rin, folding her into the right side of his chest avoiding pressing her against his armor. She recalled he felt warm and home-like. It was the first time she had noticed that he had his own distinctive scent. His mokomoko smelled like the forest and pine trees. For a moment she thought she felt him inhaling the top of her head, her awkward pony tail ticking the inside of his nose. "You will be safe here."

"Who will take care of Rin now?"

"Kaede," Sesshomaru-sama answered her, "come," stood. He let her keep her hand in his. She watched as it swung lightly by his side until they were parted.

"Sesshomaru-sama?" The little girl whispered. "Don't forget me!"

His deep voice floated into her ears almost as if it didn't exist, so quiet none heard but her, "I will visit often. I will not forget."

You will be safe here…those words, he had promised she would be safe. "Safe," she snorted to herself. Who could was ever completely safe? As time moved on, Rin found a place for herself in the village. Jinenji taught her herbs and medicines along-side Kagome, when she finally returned. Sango taught her to fight demons and she sparred with Kohaku when he visited. Rin was already a skilled fighter, something she had kept from Sesshomaru-sama for fear of him impaling Inuyasha for placing her in danger. When he said safe, he meant safe, countless battles broke out between the two of them over the years when Sesshomaru felt like Rin was poorly guarded.

If he only knew what happened the day she received the gashes on her stomach. If he had seen what had sliced into her, and how she lay in a pool of her own blood for an hour until Jinenji found her. Inuyasha wasn't there that day. He was off with Kagome in a nearing village cleansing it of demons. Miroku and Sango were also away, leaving the village relatively unguarded. Kaede was off at some hut on the other side of the forest helping a woman in childbirth. Neither one of them were a match for what came ravaging through the trees that day. Before she knew it, she was mauled. She attempted to stop the bleeding with pressure. Her body didn't like that. She tried vainly to stop the bleeding until Jinenji found her. She begged him to help her but swore him to silence, something horrible would happen if he told anyone, especially Inuyasha. Jinenji, ever the sweet heart he was agreed. The poultice he made staunched the crimson tide. Then he offered to make her something that would blight the sense of smell of any yokai, specially Inuyasha. And Sesshomaru-sama if he ever returns. They tested the green powder that Jinenji made on Shippo and on Inuyasha. As a hanyou the powder lasted longer than she expected. For Shippo it lasted only a few days. She just hoped it would have the same effect on him.

"Ready," Rin whispered and slipped out the door. As she passed by Kagome's hut, she poured the green powder into the dirt. She kicked it in with her feet, careful not to make too much noise. This would stop Inuyasha from smelling her departure and Sesshomaru-sama, should he decide to come once more. He always sent a letter via Aun letting her know when to expect him. She used to look forward to his short visits. Sesshomaru came almost every month, and each month he brought her something new, a Kimono, a bow for her hair, an ivory brush that she packed to come with her, sturdy shoes, winter clothes and blankets to keep her warm. The last time he came, things had changed completely, what he did left her feeling shocked and unnerved. It seemed ever since she turned fifteen something was set off between them. Every conversation turned into a battle. He was unnerved that she would not yield to him, she knew that much and she enjoyed watching him lose his composure. Her favorite memory was the time she was walking in the middle of the night to help deliver a child. Satsu, who became her best friend came running into Kaede's hut. She lived on the outskirts of the village, which meant whenever visitors came with emergencies, their home was the first encountered. "A man just came to our home, he said his wife is in labor, and needs help!" The girl tripped on Jaken on her way in and would have landed on her face, instead she landed in Sesshomaru-sama's lap.

Rin covered her mouth trying not to laugh. Satsu looked up to golden eyes that dared her to remain in that uncomfortable position for longer than a moment. Jaken's eyes were swirling recovering from the blow of her boots hitting his head. "Where is he from?" Kaede-sama asked from her bed. She had been sick that time.

"A village ten miles away," Satsu replied quickly moving herself out of the lap, her cheeks red.

"I'll go," Rin stood up from the fire. "Let me just get some supplies, may I take Aun?" She turned to Sesshomaru-sama.

Sesshomaru gazed at her, she hated when he looked at her like that, "I will accompany you." He stood.

"You don't need to, it will be faster on Aun and men aren't really supposed to come to births. I'll be back in a while," she rushed to the cabinets looking for the herbs for birth. There were ones to help with pain, ones to help with bleeding.

He continued to the door while she ransacked the cupboards.

"I said stay here," Rin yelled at him, "I don't need you, you'll just be in the way."

"It's nighttime," Sesshomaru-sama's voice responded.

"And?" She raised an eyebrow at him, "I walk alone at night all the time, at least this time I have two headed dragon." She finished packing, "come on Satsu."

"Rin, you stupid girl don't argue with Sesshomaru-sama. There are night robbers, and villains and demons."

"And I still don't need either one of you, I'm not a little girl anymore, stay here," she ran out the door and down the stairs.

"Rin!" Jaken screamed at her chasing her down the stairs. She jumped onto Aun's back.

Rin reached a hand out to help Satsu on. Satsu nervously got on and held onto Rin's waist. "What Jaken-sama, human babies don't wait for yokai Lords and their underlings to stop being so uselessly overprotective of their human wards to be born, I'm going!" She gave Aun a kick. The two heads glanced to an extremely pissed off looking dog demon then back at Rin, whose eyes were boring equal holes into them.

"Rin, he doesn't like the way you are dressed," Jaken made it to Aun's side.

"What's wrong with my clothes?" She was wearing a light kimono, so light it may have been almost see through, it was meant for sleeping. She was tired of her legs sweating in the summer, so she hemmed it up to her mid-thighs. "Kagome-sama's skirts are shorter, what's the problem?"

"Rin," oh there was his voice. It had been happening more frequently when he said her name that her heart would jump into her throat. "I will accompany you, or you will not go."

"You can stay here or I will take a horse which is much more dangerous in the middle of the night than riding a two headed dragon," she folded her arms over her breasts, "and I don't have time to change, if you don't like it find something else for me to wear. Make yourself useful," she glared at Jaken.

Sesshomaru was by her side in a flash. His eyes said it all then. His frustration, his fury, "I will accompany you, Aun, go."

Satsu hid behind Rin's shoulder avoiding the angry stares and unsaid words between the two of them. "You know someday, you're going to have to accept that I am not a little girl anymore, what about when I get married? What if I want to have children?"

He practically choked at those words. "This Sesshomaru will approve of any potential match."

"This Rin will choose on her own thank you. What are you going to do then? Kill off every would be suitor?" He continued soaring next to them.

"I think you're making him mad," Satsu squeaked.

"So?" Rin shot back at her, "Sesshomaru would never hurt me." That was worth the next look she got. "I mean Sesshomaru-sama of course. Come on, we have to hurry Aun," she gave him a firm kick to fly faster towards the village the man said he lived in. "Besides I don't plan on staying in the village, what if I decide to leave?" She loved bringing that one up.

"You will inform this Sesshomaru first," he grunted at her.

"And if I don't"

"I will find you," he said simply.

"And if I don't want you to?"

"You think to stop me?"

"You're making him mad," Satsu continued cringing.

"I think it's time you let me go, go back to Kaede's hut, I'll be back soon," she insisted.

"You will change into something more modest," he intoned firmly. She hadn't noticed a kimono draped over his wrist.

"This is fine."

"You're showing your…" he stopped short of saying that her breasts were visible through the sheen material.

"Then don't look," she folded her hands over herself, "besides this is going to get ruined when the baby comes. I'll change then."

"Before."

"After."

He was practically fuming and Rin was reveling in her power over him, "it's not like any of the men there haven't seen breasts before."

That completely unhinged him, he flew behind her. "I can't believe you said that," Satsu said against Rin's back.

"Hurry Aun," she urge them.

"You could just go back, I told you birthing babies isn't a place for me," she said.

When she noticed he made no move to return, Rin let out a frustrated scream and reconciled herself to his presence. She had at least unnerved him once.

His damn sense of smell, Rin sneered she had to be ready, she didn't need his help, and he would not let her leave if he knew where she was going. That was if he would even bother coming back. Shaking her head, Rin walked away from Kagome's hut and towards the barn. Kohaku and Sango taught her to walk so lightly her footfalls made no more noise than a feather gracing the ground. Time was running short. She only had three days now to make the journey or Kohaku would die.

Rin opened the doors to the barn quietly shouldering her heavy bag. She walked towards her tall brown-mare. Another gift from Sesshomaru-sama. She told him how much she missed Aun. Aun he could not part with. He arrived on foot for her sixteenth birthday with this mare. He told her that the mare was meant to help keep her safe and make her trips less taxing on her body.

She took the rest of the powder from the first pouch and rubbed it over her horse's feet and gently sprinkled it on her fur. She came with a simple smooth leather bridle and brown riding saddle, with large saddle bags. "Mesuiguru," she named her. Mesuiguru had golden eyes that seemed to take everything in. Rin saddled her in silence quieting her with clicks and a fresh carrot, "quiet, Mesuiguru," she whispered praying that Inuyasha would not hear her. If only she could have concocted something for those sharp ears that seemed to hear everything.

Rin took Mesuiguru from the barn. She walked with her in the dark for a half mile down the dirt road that lead from the village before she quietly mounted the horse and whispered, "let's go." She gave a gentle kick and they were walking slowly from the village. It wasn't strange to hear the sounds of horses in the middle of the night, she was sure if Inuyasha heard it he would sleep through it.

"I'm sorry," Rin whispered in her heart, "I'm sorry everyone," she spurred her horse onward. She took one last look over her shoulder, saying goodbye to the simple huts with stones lining the roof, to the dirty ground and then focused on the horizon. The sun would be coming soon, she had three days and if she didn't make it in time, Kohaku would perish. Her only comfort was that it was the middle of the summer and she didn't need to bring more with her.

Please Review! If you have read it before let me know what you think of the updates as I get to them.