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Cold water jolted him awake. Clint immediately gasped for air, thinking he had been drowning, or being tortured. But he hadn't…

Ambient light filled the sky. He looked around him, confused. This didn't seem like Vormir. No ice, no snow, no mysterious mountain man...The last thing he remembered was…

Oh god.

Dread began to fill his stomach as he suddenly became aware of his right hand. As if in molasses, he slowly looked to his hand and opened it. Almost innocently, the soul stone sat in his palm, glowing a warm orange.

He choked back a sob as he remembered what had happened for it to have appeared in his hand.

It was losing Laura and the kids all over again.

The familiar, but still devastating pain flooded his chest as he numbly navigated his way back to his current time.

—

Bright lights and white suits filled his vision after leaping back through the Quantum Realm. He vaguely heard Steve say something, but overwhelming grief suddenly gripped him, and he dropped to his knees.

He was looking straight ahead, but wasn't seeing what was in front of him. What was he going to say? It was as simple as that. Nat wasn't…Nat wasn't there with him. She hadn't returned.

"Clint…where's Nat?" he heard Professor Hulk ask him for the third time.

He felt his tongue turn to lead, words escaping him. Clint could only lift his head up to sadly meet the green gaze.

After a minute, he heard voices and the shuffling of feet. Someone brought him up from his knees and gently led him outside. Everything was moving too fast for him to process, so he just let them happen.

God, Nat was gone. His best friend, partner, other half…was just gone.

Fury had been outraged when Clint had told him he didn't want to kill Natasha. It was the mission, the director had argued. She had been a global threat, and it was SHIELD's job to neutralize them. While he had understood that, Natasha had been different. There was something beyond the mask she put on as an assassin. He had believed that she could be a useful agent of SHIELD. But beyond those cold, objective words, Clint had believed that Natasha could actually be good. That she could impact the world positively.

She had objected. She had objected so many times. They had gone back and forth, verbally and physically, about what Clint had proposed. But it wasn't him that she was fighting against; it had been against herself. What Clint had suggested would be Natasha going against everything she had trained for. The chances of her actually accepting, he had realized, was slim.

But in the end, she had agreed to his offer. What began as an assassination mission ended in a complicated extraction mission out of Russia. For days on end, Natasha had insisted that he had made the wrong decision, that she would never amount to any good person. What he was doing was a waste of time.

Unaware of his surroundings, he choked back a sob. Realizing he was outside, he looked up.

Had it really been a waste of time, Natasha?

He felt more tears run down his face as he silently addressed his friend.

Lowering his head, he began to take in his surroundings. A beautiful lake spanned before him, a casual wind rustling the water here and there. Out of his periphery, he took note of Steve and Professor Hulk, and presumed Tony and Thor were behind him.

Steve took a seat next to him, gripping his shoulder, both in support and sympathy. He turned his head to the soldier, and was met with red eyes, tears running down his cheeks. Pursing his lips, he reciprocated the gesture. The heavy weight of silence seemed to rest on everyone's shoulders.

After a few minutes, he heard Thor saying to not worry, and that Nat could be brought back with the stones. Suddenly, his blood began to boil. Couldn't he see that that was impossible? Out of the people there, he, the king of Asgard, should understand.

"It can't be undone!" he shouted, silencing Thor and spooking the other three. Pain filled his heart as he continued. "It can't be undone…nothing…nothing can bring her back…" More tears escaped as he wiped his nose with the sleeve of his jacket. "It should have been me…it should have been me…"

The incongruous sound of the water flowing through the lake was a sharp contrast to all their moods. The only moment that had disturbed their silent mourning was an angry professor throwing an empty bench into the lake.

Clint wanted a funeral, they all did. But they had all the stones now, and time was of the essence. The rest of them vowed that they wouldn't let her sacrifice go to waste.

Steadily, each Avenger headed back inside the facility, until it was just Steve and Clint.

"She," he began hoarsely, tears still fresh, "she always told me that…that I'd be the one to die a hero's death…and she'd…she'd just be fodder for the greater good of SHIELD." He hollowly smirked at the irony of the situation. "But look…look at her now." He sniffed, feeling more tears coming.

If this seemed shorter, it was because I didn't remember this scene as well as the others in Endgame...tbh I was just in shock...