Chapter 57: Biggest Family Christmas
Santana's POV
Brittany and the twins got out of hospital after 8 days so we're all living together at home again. There wasn't anything necessarily wrong with either Brittany or the babies, the doctor just wanted to monitor them. The first few days was to monitor all 3 of them and then it was just to check on the babies thereafter. Brittany was cleared to go home after about 4 days but she didn't want to leave Josh and Mia in hospital so she stayed until the babies could go home. I stayed the first few nights but then I went home because I hated leaving Aiden and Ella with other people all the time. It was tough because I wanted to stay with Brittany and the twins but I also wanted to be there for Aiden and Ella. It's all good now though and all 6 of us are at home.
I'm currently getting a few things from the grocery store with Josh and Mia. Brittany's younger brother Ben took Aiden and Ella out for the day and Brittany is at home resting. She's doing well after the operation but it's going to take a number of weeks for her to fully recover so I thought with Aiden and Ella out then I could take the twins with me and that would give her some time on her own to relax.
I'm just picking up some fruit and vegetables at the produce section when I run into someone I know. It was a woman I did some work for a while back. I hadn't seen her in a while so we got to talking and catching up. I was just telling her about getting married and how I've got 4 kids now and she was telling me about her life.
"So, how old are they?" the woman asks, looking down at Josh and Mia.
"2 weeks old" I reply. "Technically though they're premature babies because they weren't positioned correctly so it was a planned caesarean birth so they're still quite little even for 2 weeks old" I add.
"I had a caesarean birth and it was actually ok but the only downside was that I felt I couldn't exercise nearly as quickly compared to after my first baby" she points out.
"I did wonder if that might make a difference" I nod.
"I wouldn't worry about it anyway because you don't look like you need to lose too much weight so I'm sure the exercising can wait until you're ready to lose those few pounds" she replies.
"My wife was pregnant" I state. I'm a little offended, I'm not going to lie.
"Oh…I'm sorry, I thought…"
"It's ok. I didn't say one way or another" I shrug.
"I am sorry, I didn't mean any disrespect" she apologises.
"It's fine, but I should go anyway before the twins wake up" I say. The woman and I say goodbye and then head off in different directions. In all honesty I think I probably have put some weight on but just hearing it aloud made me really feel like shit.
Once I get everything I need at the grocery store, I make my way home again. I take the groceries to the kitchen and unpack them before heading upstairs with the babies. I give them each their bottle before winding and changing them. I then get them settled in their cribs before going to find Brittany.
"Am I fat?" I ask, walking into the bedroom and taking my shirt off as I approach the full-length mirror we have.
"There are many words to describe you baby and fat is definitely one of them" Brittany smirks at me.
"I'm being serious, are you being serious?" I ask curiously.
"Of course not" Brittany rolls her eyes at me. "Not once have you ever looked fat" she adds.
"I met this old client of mine today and she thought I was the pregnant one" I state.
"I'm sure she didn't mean it because a lot of people wouldn't automatically assume I'm the only one who can get pregnant because they don't know your medical business" Brittany points out.
"She said I needed to lose a few pounds" I state.
"Did she actually come right out and say, Santana you need to lose a few pounds?" Brittany asks.
"No" I shake my head. "I was talking about how the babies were delivered by caesarean and she said one of her kids had to be delivered that way. She then went on to tell me about how she found it took longer for her to lose the baby weight because she couldn't exercise as quickly and I was just saying I thought that might be the case. Then she told me to wait until I was ready to lose a few pounds" I add.
"I think she was just making conversation and assuming she was reassuring you that you don't need to rush. I don't think she actually meant you were fat" Brittany replies.
"You weren't there babe. It sounded to me like she was calling me fat" I say.
"Ok well I'm telling you right now that you're not fat" she smiles. "I honestly don't think she meant any harm but if you think she did then she clearly needs her eyes testing. There's not an ounce of fat on you honey" she reassures me.
"Ok" I nod with a smile. I then make my way over to the bed and lie down next to Brittany, putting my arm over her.
"Santana, please be careful" Brittany states.
"I'm sorry, I'm just trying to put my arm around you" I tell her.
"I know but you were too close to my stiches" she replies.
"I'm sorry" I apologise. "Do you want me to kiss it better?" I smirk while rolling over slightly to lie on my side so I can see her better.
"I really don't" she replies seriously.
"Ok, no need to be so repulsed by the thought of me kissing you" I say with a laugh.
"I'm sorry, that came out a lot more abrupt than I meant it too" she smiles softly. "I'm still in a little discomfort at the moment and the scar is still relatively fresh looking so I'm not in that kind of mood. It's actually kinda gross looking at the moment" she tells me.
"Ok" I smile. I know it's only been two weeks since the babies were born but I am slightly concerned about Brittany at the moment. I'm just worried she's getting a little insecure about how she looks again because her first two pregnancies were ok because she could exercise and everything was back to normal so to speak but now with this pregnancy she's left with a scar. Now I know myself it's going to fade over time and such like but Brittany can get really insecure about this kind of thing. She had her appendix removed not long after we first started dating and she hated that scar for a while.
"Speaking of bodies changing, do you think a lot about exercise after a caesarean and how quickly someone can lose baby weight?" she asks quietly.
"Not really, I just figured the recovery would be a little longer with a caesarean so women would need to take their time and not rush into losing the baby weight. That's what I was saying to the woman today" I shrug.
"Are you worried that I'll stay like this for too long because I know it's different this time. I've put on more weight because I was pregnant with two this time around" she says.
"Honey, what are you talking about. I love the way you look" I assure her.
"It's ok Santana. I totally get why you might have been thinking about it" she shrugs.
"Brittany, I don't think about how much you weigh or when you'll lose weight. I just meant in general I assumed things would be different between the two birthing methods. It makes sense because you had a serious operation so it will take longer to heal than the first two pregnancies" I say. That really isn't why I brought it up to the woman today, I was literally just making a normal assumption.
"It is a concern of mine that I can't lose the pregnancy weight that quickly" she tells me.
"You look beautiful Brittany, I promise you. You don't need to lose any weight right now, probably not really ever" I smile. "I know you get hung up on this kind of thing but honestly it's not a big deal. You look beautiful no matter what's going on. You looked great before the pregnancy, during it and now after it."
"Ok" she sighs.
"I'm telling the truth babe, you look great" I say while leaning in to kiss her.
"Ok" she nods. "You look great too by the way. There was no way that woman meant you looked fat" she adds.
"Ok" I smile. I find it weird sometimes how Brittany can be so positive and complimentary about me but when it's about her she's so insecure and never believes me when I tell her she looks great.
XXX
After spending some time with Brittany, Josh and Mia woke up again so we went through their normal routine of feeding and diaper changing before playing with them for a little while. They're really young so they can't do a lot at the moment but it's really cute when they try to hold onto your finger or play with one of their toys. They actually seem to have latched onto the toy pandas that Aiden gave them which I think is so sweet.
We've now just left Ben's place with all 4 children. We took Josh and Mia inside to see Ben and his girlfriend for a little while before we got Aiden and Ella ready to go home. We're just getting the 4 kids into the car now but Brittany is struggling to get Aiden and Ella in the very back of the car since she's in pain from c section.
"Ok, stop it" I say seriously before climbing into the back.
"You're so hot when you're so authoritative" she says with a smirk.
"I don't want you doing things that cause you pain. I did tell you to let me get Aiden and Ella into the back" I tell her.
"I know but I thought I could manage" she points out. It's actually getting a bit hard for her to do a lot of things at the moment so she feels like she can't help me so she wants to try and do something. I don't like her carrying the car seats either with the twins in them because it's heavy so I think she's trying to at least get Aiden and Ella sorted so she feels she's doing something.
"Once you've fully recovered then you can do anything you want but as of right now, just let me do things" I tell her.
"I can't leave you to do everything" she replies.
"Yes, you can babe" I smile. "I don't mind doing all of this just now. I mean in a way I sort of owe it to you because you've had to go through 9 months of discomfort with all 4 of our little angels" I say while smiling at the kids.
"I'm an angel" Ella says happily.
"I'm not an angel" Aiden tells me. "I'm a big boy" he smiles.
"You're still my little angel" I assure him.
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Monday 23rd October 2023
Mia and Josh are over two months old now and Brittany and I are settling into things quite well now. It was tough in the beginning to manage 4 children at once but we're really starting to get the hang out it now. Aiden and Ella have been amazing with their new brother and sister which is great but they're also typical toddlers so Brittany and I do have our panicked moments at times.
Ella is turning two years old today so the whole family is coming over to celebrate with us. It seems like it's been no time at all since Ella was born but at the same time a lot has happened since. Not only is Ella excited about today but Aiden is as well. Ella is getting older now so she's beginning to understand a lot more of the things Aiden likes so he's got someone to play with now which he loves. He isn't as thrilled about the tea parties he has to go to that Ella holds but he loves it when she agrees to play cars with him so he's definitely excited about Ella getting more toys for the two of them to share.
Brittany is just getting Josh and Mia sorted and then all 6 of us are going to sit in the living room and Ella can open her birthday presents. Then later on all the family will come over and visit and I've made a little buffet of food for later so it's like a mini party.
"Aiden would you like to bring the diapers to mommy?" Brittany asks Aiden.
"I'm big boy now, I don't need diapers. I use big potty" Aiden states proudly.
"I know sweetheart and I'm proud of you" Brittany smiles. "I meant though, could you bring the diapers to me for you baby brother and sister."
"I can do that mommy" Aiden smiles brightly before running to grab the diapers and giving them to Brittany.
"Thank you, sweetheart" Brittany smiles at Aiden before taking the diapers and changing the babies. I was going to help but Brittany said she would do it and I could make sure all of Ella's presents are set up in the living room.
Once Brittany is finished tending to the kids and I've got the living room all set up, we all head there and sit down. Josh and Mia sit at the side on their bouncers and Aiden climbs onto the couch next to Brittany while I sit on the floor with Ella in front of her presents.
"Shall we open some of these up?" I ask Ella.
"Yes!" Ella screams in delight. I then pass her a present and she starts opening it.
"Oh, what have you got there?" Brittany asks our daughter when she finally gets the wrapping paper off her present.
"It's a tea set for all your little tea parties" I say while Ella looks at it confused for a moment.
"Tea party!" Ella says happily. "Mia and Josh can come too" she adds.
"How about you finish opening your presents and then you can have a tea party for all of us and your little teddies and dolls" I tell her.
"Ok" Ella shrugs. She then continues to open her presents.
"Oh, is that a new barbie doll?" I ask her as she opens a present from one of our friends.
"Yeah" Ella nods before standing up and walking over to Aiden and giving him the barbie doll.
"Don't you like your barbie?" I ask amused.
"Aiden likes barbies" Ella shrugs before going back to open more presents.
"I know sweetheart but this barbie was given to you" I tell her.
"We can share" Ella tells me.
"Ok" I nod.
Once Ella finishes opening all of her presents, we all play together with some of her new things before getting lunch. We're now all sitting in the living room again waiting on our family and friends coming over to visit. Aiden and Ella are playing on the floor and Brittany and I are looking after the babies. I'm sitting with Mia and Brittany has Josh.
"You do realise that in the click of my fingers these two will be having their second birthday" Brittany tells me.
"I know" I nod. "Aiden and Ella are growing up so fast so Josh and Mia will likely do the same" I point out.
"We just have to try and make the most of it right now when they're so young because all 4 of our kids will be older and talking back to us before we know it" Brittany says.
"Aiden has even started talking back already" I say with a laugh.
"He has but at the same time I find it so cute when he does" she says.
"Aiden and all of our kids are cute no matter what they do" I state.
"That is true" Brittany nods in agreement.
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The last month and a half have flown in and now we're in December already. The twins are already coming on leaps and bounds. We're decorating the house for Christmas today. Josh and Mia are napping right now so Aiden and Ella are going to help us with the decorations. Firstly though, I'm getting them dressed in their little Santa outfits that I got them a few years ago.
"Oh wow, look at you 3" Brittany smiles as the 3 of us walk into the living room dressed in our festive costumes.
"We cute mommy?" Aiden asks.
"Very cute" she smiles.
"Who's the cutest?" I ask while winking at her hoping she'll give me the edge.
"It's a tie between Aiden and Ella" Brittany smirks at me.
"That's not fair. I thought I looked really cute today" I say.
"You do" Aiden tells me while hugging me.
"Thank you, son, at least someone thinks I look cute" I tell him.
"And me" Ella says while running over to me and hugging me.
"Thank you" I tell my daughter. I then look over to Brittany to see if she'll change her mind since our son and daughter admitted I was cute.
"Ok, so decorations" Brittany says while turning around to look at the tree.
"You must be shy babe. You can tell me I look cute later once we're alone" I tell her.
"I'm actually surprised you haven't bought little baby Santa costumes for Josh and Mia" Brittany points out as we begin getting the decorations out of the box.
"You obviously haven't gone to the study then and checked on our little ones" I say with a smirk.
"Wait, they're dressed as baby Santa's too?" she asks me and I nod. "Oh god, all 4 of my kids now copy you. I don't know how I feel about this. I really want a mini Brittany" she teases.
"I can be a mini Brittany" Aiden states as he runs over to Brittany and starts dancing.
"Oh my god that is so cute" I say aloud. That literally has melted my heart.
"You're a great little dancer aren't you" Brittany smiles at Aiden. "We should have a little dance together later when we've finished decorating and cleared everything up" she adds.
"Ok mommy" Aiden smiles back at Brittany. Once Brittany and I get the tree all set up, Aiden and Ella help us decorate with baubles and tinsel and we get the lights put on it.
"Who wants to put the star on top of the tree?" I ask.
"I want Ella to do it" Aiden replies.
"That's very nice of you sweetheart" I smile at Aiden. "Ella do you want to put the star on top of the tree?" I ask my daughter.
"Ok" Ella smiles at me. Aiden then hands her the star and I lift her up so she can reach the top of the tree. She then carefully places the star at the top.
"The tree looks great now" Brittany says.
"Dance off now mommy?" Aiden asks Brittany.
"Ok sweetheart" Brittany smiles at Aiden.
"I'll go and see if Josh and Mia are awake and then if they are, they can watch the dance off with Ella and I" I say.
"I'll help you" Brittany says while following me. "We'll be back in two seconds" she tells Aiden and Ella. We then go and get the twins and take them to the living room.
"Ok, dance off" I say as Ella and I get settled on the couch with Josh and Mia.
"Are you ready to lose Aid?" Brittany teases our son.
"I win mommy" Aiden states confidently.
"We'll see about that buddy" Brittany smirks at Aiden.
"Who will win mom?" Aiden asks me.
"Mommy is really good at dancing but you're also very good so I don't know. Ella and I will just need to judge based on what you two dance like just now" I say.
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Saturday 16th December 2023
My parents are looking after all 4 of the kids tonight at their place. Brittany and I are going to Brittany's work Christmas party tonight so my parents were more than happy to have their grandchildren. I did offer that they could watch the kids at my place and then head home once Brittany and I got back but my mom said she would just take them to her house and keep them overnight. I was happy about that because it gives Brittany and I the whole night to ourselves but I was also slightly nervous. This is the first night Mia and Josh will spend somewhere else and my parents first night with all 4 of them together so I'm just hoping everyone settles ok. Aiden and Ella love staying with their grandparents but I don't know how Mia and Josh will find it. I was a little worried about my parents having all the kids for the first time but my dad reminded me that that's what it was like when I was younger since there were 4 of us kids so I think they'll be ok.
My parents collected the kids a little while ago so it's just Brittany and I left at home. We don't actually need to get ready for the party right now because it's not until later so I'm hoping for some time with Brittany just now.
"Hey, what are you up to?" I ask Brittany as I walk into the bedroom.
"I'm just doing some stretches and then I'm going to do some exercising" she tells me as she gets up from the floor.
"I know a different way you could get some exercise" I smirk at her as I walk towards her.
"You do?" she asks.
"Yeah" I nod while wrapping my arms around her waist before kissing her. "We've got plenty of time before we need to go out to get a good workout done in bed" I smirk.
"Not tonight babe" she replies while pulling away from me.
"It's been 4 months now Britt" I sigh. I'm not a sex pest or anything, I just think 4 months is a bit of a long time to go without having sex especially when there isn't anything wrong with our relationship.
"Oh, I'm so sorry" Brittany states. "I've just been very busy with two new-borns and two toddlers but sure let's satisfy your sexual needs because that's more important, right" she adds sarcastically.
"The children aren't even here right now" I point out.
"I know that but it doesn't mean that I'm not still busy" she states. "I barely get any time to myself to shower never mind trying to find time to satisfy you" she adds.
"We have time now" I say. "The kids aren't here and I've done all the laundry today and cleaned the house so what's the big deal" I ask.
"I need to use my time when the kids aren't here to workout and stuff" she replies.
"Why do you have to work out?" I ask. I know it sounds like a stupid question but Brittany has been going to the gym a lot recently so there really isn't anything to work out.
"Because I want to keep fit because running around after 4 children is hard. Plus, I'm going back to work in a couple of months so I want to make sure the baby weight is fully off me before then" she states.
"There is no weight on you never mind baby weight" I say while rolling my eyes. I understand what she's telling me but she does not need to lose weight. She never did in the first place but I let that go because she wanted to lose a few pounds which was ok but now she's already lost weight so I don't want her to lose any more otherwise she won't be healthy.
"I'd still like to be a few pounds lighter" she replies.
"No, you wouldn't" I say and she just looks at me. "You just want some excuse today so you don't need to have sex with me and I want to know why" I say seriously. Fair enough if she doesn't want to then she doesn't have to but I want to know why she feels like that because as far as I could see we were happy together.
"It's not an excuse" she shrugs.
"Babe" I say while walking closer to her and wrapping my arms around her waist. "I really miss you and I don't get why you don't miss it either."
"I should get organised for this party" she says while looking away from me and moving out of my hold.
"We've got hours yet honey" I tell her.
"I'm going to the gym. I'll see you when I get back" she says before grabbing her gym bag and then heading downstairs with her stuff. I don't even bother going after her because I know it's not going to make a difference right now.
It's about an hour before Brittany gets back from the gym. We don't really get a chance to talk because she goes straight for a shower since we need to get ready for the party. I showered when Brittany was out so I'm just getting changed now. I'm just doing my makeup when Brittany comes into the room after her shower.
"Can we please not go out tonight on an argument?" I ask.
"I'm not trying to argue with you; you're just being unreasonable" Brittany replies.
"I tried to kiss you and said I really missed being intimate with you. That's not unreasonable" I state.
"I told you I wasn't in the mood" she replies.
"I know that but it has been a long time so I wanted to know if there was an issue or something between us" I say.
"I need to get ready right now" she says before disappearing into the bathroom again to get ready. I really don't know what's going on with us but I don't like it. I didn't want to push her in the beginning but now we have brought the situation up, I'd quite like to know why we've been so distant.
Brittany's POV
The whole cab ride to the party was awkward. We didn't really know what to say to each other because both of us were pissed that we're fighting. It was supposed to be a fun night out together and we managed to turn the atmosphere sour. I also really didn't mean to come across as so cold towards Santana so I was feeling really bad about that. I want us to sort out what's going on but at the same time we're on our way out so I don't want to cause a scene or draw attention to us.
Once we get inside the party, Santana gets us some drinks and I go and find a table where some of my colleagues are at. I'm just catching up with them since I haven't been at work recently when Santana sits down next to me with the drinks.
"Brittany was just showing us a picture of Josh and Mia, they look so much like Aiden and Ella" Martin says to Santana.
"They are really cute aren't they" Santana says, smiling at the thought of the kids.
"I actually think they look a little more like Brittany compared to how Aiden and Ella look a lot like you Santana" Maxine points out.
"Did my wife tell you to say that" Santana asks amused.
"She did actually" Maxine says with a laugh.
"Thank you for that" I say while laughing.
"Seriously though, I actually do think they look a lot like you Brittany. They do look like Santana too but a lot like you" Maxine tells me.
"So how are things going with 4 little ones?" Martin asks. "I mean I've only got the one and I'm struggling" he says with a chuckle.
"It is really tough but I think we're getting there" I say positively. It's really not easy but I did actually think it might be worse than it is so I think things are going ok now.
"Britt is doing amazingly. I mean I'm back at work now and I don't think I could stay at home myself all week while Brittany was at work all day" Santana says. It's things like this that really make me hate myself because my reaction earlier was not ok. Santana didn't deserve the way I treated her.
"I would say you do just as well because you do a lot of night feeds even when you're working" I point out. Santana doesn't say anything, she just smiles at me.
"Hey, we've all had a few drinks now so why don't we hit the dance floor and get this party started" Martin suggests.
"Let's do it" I say while standing up. Most of us at the table get up except Santana. "Aren't you coming?" I ask my wife.
"It's ok, you dance with your friends" Santana smiles.
"I don't want to dance with them, I want to dance with you" I say while taking her hand and pulling her up from her seat. "I don't want either of us sitting here miserable because we've had a fight" I say.
"Ok" Santana nods. We then head to the dance floor and begin dancing. Just as we get there the song finishes and a slow song comes on. "We don't need to dance to this if you don't want" she shrugs.
"No, we will" I say while putting my hands on her waist. She then puts her arms around my neck and we slowly dance to the music.
"I don't understand this babe" she admits. "I'm just confused because you didn't want me near you earlier and now you want us to dance together."
"I'm sorry about earlier and about the last 4 months" I say honestly. I really never meant for things to get so out of hand like they did.
"I want to know what's going on" she states.
"Come here" I say while pulling Santana to the side. "Can we talk?" I ask.
"Sure" Santana sighs.
"Let's go somewhere quieter" I say while pulling her towards the bathrooms. When we get there, there is no one else in there but I pull us into a stall anyway so we can talk alone.
"Is it me, are you just not attracted to me any more or something?" Santana asks. God no, that is not what this is about.
"No, it's nothing like that" I assure her.
"So, you do still find me attractive then?" she asks me.
"Yes, of course I do" I tell her.
"So, what's going on then?" Santana asks. "We've never had sex since the twins were born so it's been over 4 months now. I know I've tried so I want to know why you don't want to" she says.
"In the beginning I was just very sore and busy after the twins came" I say. It took a while for me to recover and for the scar to fully heal properly so that alone was enough to put me off the idea of sex.
"I get that" Santana nods.
"The scar itself took a while to properly heal and where it was located on my body was a bit of an awkward area so I had to let things go naturally" I say. Santana just looks at me confused though. "It was just above my bikini line so I couldn't wax or anything like that for a while because the whole area was really tender for a while" I explain.
"Ok, so body hair?" she questions. "Really babe?"
"Don't make it out as this is no big deal or it's nothing. I've had four babies so I think I'm only entitled to be insecure about my body" I say seriously. I'm only 25 and as much as I love my children, they've done a lot to my body.
"I thought you knew I loved you no matter what" she says.
"I do but believe it or not, it's not all about you" I say. "I am learning to like myself at the moment so sometimes I don't feel sexy enough. It's not about what you want but about how I feel personally. If I don't feel confident in myself then I'm not going to want to have sex, am I?" I reason.
"I'm sorry" Santana apologises. "I just don't like seeing you this down about yourself because I think you look amazing no matter what. I just can't think of why you wouldn't love how you look because I do" she adds.
"I should be the one apologising because I've not been fair on you. I should have told you sooner about how I felt" I say. I never meant for Santana to think it was her fault because it really wasn't.
"We're both just frustrated I guess" Santana points out.
"Look, at the end of the day, I was just healing from the c-section and really quite busy with the twins that the longer things went on, the worse I felt. I didn't mean for it to go on for 4 months because I am fully healed now. I guess I'm just embarrassed now and really exhausted from running around all the time" I say honestly.
"You have nothing to be embarrassed about" Santana assures me.
"Ok" I nod.
"So where does this leave us?" Santana asks.
"I don't want you to misunderstand me because I do miss that kind of thing with you too" I assure her. "I just feel so exhausted these days."
"I can appreciate that because I'm exhausted too but I do want to understand what happened earlier" she says. "The kids weren't there and we were alone so why didn't you want to?" she asks.
"I hadn't showered yet or even made the effort to look sexy for you so I wasn't in the mood. I'm not proud of myself but after a couple of months of being so busy and stuff, I sort of let myself go slightly" I admit.
"Honey, you're in really good shape" she assures me.
"I didn't mean with working out and stuff. I meant with my personal appearance" I say. "This is really gross but before tonight I hadn't waxed my legs in ages and I don't even know when I last moisturised myself. I've got really dry skin and…" I can't even finish speaking when Santana leans in and kisses me.
"None of that bothers me" Santana says honestly.
"You make the effort all the time to look good for me so I didn't want you to see me as a mess but I honestly didn't mean to make you feel bad about yourself" I tell her.
"I was a bit worried but I knew if it was really serious then you would talk to me so I'm not bothered by it any more now that I know what was going on" she replies with a smile.
"If you really want then I could get you off right now" I smirk while moving my hands gently down her back and unzipping her dress.
"No, I want you" she smiles at me. "I don't want this to just be about me or be some quickie in a bathroom. I just want us to be together."
"So, you don't want sex?" I ask confused.
"I can't say I don't because I do but that's not what all of this is about. I just really miss being intimate with you in every way. Even when we kiss these days it doesn't feel as passionate as it could be and we don't even hold hands anymore. You clam up a lot whenever I put my arm around you too" she points out.
"I'm sorry about that. This is all about me and not about you" I assure her. "I just feel really gross in myself at times so I don't want to get too close to you because I feel horrible."
"If you feel like you don't have enough time sometimes to do what you need to do then just let me know I'll take over with the kids" she replies.
"It's not that because I do have time sometimes" I say. Santana does more than her share of parenting duties so it's not about that. "I've just gotten really lazy recently and a little complacent which like I say I'm not proud of."
"Well, if it helps, I think you look amazing regardless of anything" she smiles.
"Thank you" I smile while leaning in to kiss her.
"Why don't we go back out and enjoy the party and once we get home, we can maybe revisit this idea of being intimate again" she smirks at me.
"Ok" I smile.
XXX
Santana and I are currently in a cab on the way home. We had fun at the party but I'm looking forward to getting home and just relaxing. It's been nice to have a night out as well where we could be grownups and not have to go and change diapers all the time. I mean don't get me wrong because I love my kids but it's stressful sometimes.
"We're good now, right?" I say, turning to look at Santana.
"I think we are, yeah" Santana smiles.
"Ok, good" I say while taking her hand in mine. "I truly am sorry about how things all unfolded. I just can't help the way I am sometimes but it never means it's something you've done wrong" I say honestly.
"I just worry about you sometimes so I get panicked when something isn't right" she admits.
"I'm never going to hurt you like your ex did so don't ever think it's your fault" I tell her. "I just bottle things up but I don't mean to so sometimes I need you to just challenge me on it otherwise I won't talk about it."
"I just don't like annoying you all the time" she points out.
"You're not though so if I'm acting weird just tell me because I don't have the balls to come out and say how I feel sometimes" I admit.
"And I do?" she asks with a laugh.
"I suppose so" I chuckle. "Anyway, enough about us fighting because we're home now so let's have a nice night together" I say as the cab pulls up outside of our house. Santana pays for it and then we head inside.
"It was fun tonight" Santana says as we lock up for the night.
"It was" I nod. "Hey, come here" I say while pulling Santana close to me before kissing her.
"We really don't have to. I don't want to pressure you into it" she tells me.
"I really want to do this tonight" I say smiling softly.
"Ok, let's head upstairs then" she says smiling back before taking my hand and leading me upstairs.
"You looked really sexy tonight" I say as Santana unzips my dress at the back.
"Thank you" she smiles before I turn around and unzip her dress for her. We then slip out of our dresses and kick our shoes off before crawling onto the bed. Santana then leans in and kisses me.
"I really am sorry for the way I've been behaving recently towards you because I always find you attractive so I never want you to think that I don't" I say as Santana gently unhooks my bra.
"Just forget about it babe" she smiles at me as I sit up slightly to unhook her bra. She then slowly kisses down my body until she gets to my underwear. "Can I take them off" she asks.
"Yeah" I say quietly while nodding. This is the first time that Santana is going to see my scar and I know it's not a big deal to some people but I get really insecure about these things.
"Ok" she smiles. She gently removes my panties and then removes her own boxers before gently getting on the bed again. She looks at me for a moment before smiling. "You look beautiful" Santana tells me and I blush.
After kissing down my body and paying particular attention to my sweet spots, she gently pushes into me. I can't help but let a moan escape as she does so. I then grip onto her hips as we get into a good rhythm together.
00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000
Sunday 17th December 2023
The twins are sleeping in the nursery so I'm just sitting on top of my bed, going through some work emails. Even though I'm not working at the moment, I still like to check my email to make sure there isn't anything important that I need to know. I'm just replying to an email when I feel the bed dip ever so slightly so I look over and see Aiden climbing onto it.
"Hey buddy" I smile at my son.
"Mom shouting" Aiden whispers in my ear.
"Did you do something wrong?" I ask him while helping him sit down on the bed.
"No" Aiden shakes his head at me.
"Are you sure?" I ask and he shakes his head again. "What were you doing when mom shouted?"
"Can I play with you?" he asks.
"Aiden, what were you doing when mom got annoyed?" I ask him. He's clearly deflecting the question so he must have done something he shouldn't.
"Nothing" Aiden mumbles.
"Are you telling me the truth Aiden Pierce Lopez?" I ask him seriously. Before he can even answer me, Santana walks into the room carrying Ella.
"I told you not to leave that room" Santana states unamused.
"I wanted mommy" Aiden shrugs and glares at Santana.
"What is going on?" I ask confused as Santana places Ella down next to me.
"Aiden went outside on his own so when I gave him a telling off and managed to get him inside, he walked away in a huff. I told him not to leave the room because I was speaking to him and I didn't want him coming up here to wake up Josh and Mia" Santana replies.
"Aiden, you know not to go outside on your own" I tell him.
"Bored mommy" Aiden shrugs.
"If you're bored then you tell us and we can go outside with you and find you something to do. You do not just walk outside" I say to my son.
"Ok mommy" Aiden smiles at me before kissing my cheek.
"Are you going to apologise to mom?" I ask him and he suddenly glares at me as if to say he was just about to do it.
"Sorry" Aiden replies as he crawls down to the bottom of the bed to Santana and wraps his arms around her neck. "Love you" he mumbles to her.
"I love you too" Santana says, her demeanour quickly softening.
"Now since Josh and Mia are currently sleeping, then why don't the 4 of us play a game?" I suggest.
"Yes" Ella replies while clapping her hands excitedly.
"What we play?" Aiden asks, turning to look at his sister.
Once they decide on what we should play, we spend some time with them for a while before they need to go for their own nap. I'm currently just reading a magazine in the kitchen while I wait on Josh and Mia waking up to get their next feed.
"Hey honey" Santana smiles as she walks into the kitchen.
"Are the twins awake yet?" I ask, looking over at her.
"Not yet so I'm going to quickly make myself a coffee" she replies while firing up the coffee machine. "Do you want one?" she asks.
"Sure" I smile. She then makes us some coffee and joins me at the table.
"What are you reading?" she asks curiously.
"It's an article about polyamorous relationships and it's quite interesting actually" I reply.
"Oh, do you see yourself being with more than one person?" Santana asks with a smirk.
"It's hard enough for me to get sexy for you, I doubt I could do it for something else as well" I admit. "Seriously though, I just mean it seems interesting just how many people are actually in a relationship like that and how it actually all works."
"I don't think I could share you with anyone" Santana points out.
"In all honesty if I really wanted to then I could but I could only do it if I was with another Santana" I tell her.
"Oh, that's cute" she smiles at me before leaning in to kiss me.
XXX
The kids are all in bed now and sleeping which means I can get some relaxing time with my wife now. I'm currently just sitting in bed reading a book on my iPad while Santana is in the bathroom getting ready for bed. She had a few documents she wanted to email Artie before the morning so I was ready and in bed before her.
"Hello" Santana says seductively as she leans against the doorframe in nothing but a Santa hat.
"Uh…hi" I say surprised as I look over at her. "What's going on?" I ask.
"All 4 children are finally sleeping right now in their own rooms so I was hoping for some grownup time with my beautiful wife" she tells me.
"With you looking as sexy as that then I think that can be arranged" I smirk while putting my iPad down at the side and sitting forward.
"Good" Santana says as she strolls over to the bed where she then gets on it and straddles my waist.
"I am so turned on already" I point out.
"That is always a positive" she smiles before leaning down to kiss me. "Now as much as I love your pyjamas, can I remove them please?" she asks.
"You don't have to ask" I smirk as she begins undressing me. As soon as she does that, I flip us over so I'm on top.
"What's going on here?" she smirks back at me.
"I'm in charge tonight" I smile before slowly kissing down her body.
Santana's POV
Monday 25th December 2023
We're having everyone over for Christmas again this year. We've got both of our sets of parents coming and all of our siblings and nieces and nephews. Firstly though, we're having a quiet morning together, just the 6 of us, before everyone comes over. Speaking of the 6 of us, I don't actually know where the rest of my family is. I woke up and Brittany wasn't in bed and when I checked the other bedrooms, none of my children were in their rooms either. I'm just on my way downstairs now to find everyone.
"Morning" I say while walking into the kitchen where Brittany and all 4 children are. Aiden and Ella are sitting at the table and Mia and Josh are sitting on their bouncers at the side.
"Good morning" Brittany smiles at me while handing me some coffee before kissing me.
"Thank you" I smile back. "So, did everyone sleep well?" I ask.
"I didn't because Santa coming" Aiden replies.
"Eat the cookies?" Ella asks me.
"I think Santa did eat the cookies last night that we left out for him which also means we all must have been good boys and girls since he was here and dropped off some presents" I say.
"Can we get presents now?" Aiden asks.
"I think we should open our presents now" Brittany says. We all then head to the living room where all of our presents are.
After having a nice morning together, all opening our presents, Brittany made us some breakfast. We then all got showered and dressed for the day. I'm now making some food preparations for later while Brittany is looking after the kids. I'm expecting our families to come over any minute now.
"Babe" Brittany says as she walks into the kitchen.
"Yeah honey" I smile at her.
"Why don't you come to the living room and spend some time with us and we can get back to cooking when the others arrive" she suggests.
"I just wanted to make a head start so we weren't rushing around later" I say.
"It's Christmas though so let's spend time together" she smiles.
"Ok, I'm sorry" I say while walking over to her and kissing her. "Ok, let's go" I say while taking her hand and walking towards the door.
"Uh…not yet" she smiles before pulling me towards her where she kisses me this time. "Merry Christmas babe" she adds.
"Merry Christmas to you too" I smile. "Oh, and thank you for all of my presents. You always get me some really thoughtful stuff" I say honestly.
"You're welcome and thank you for all of my gifts too" she states. "Anyway, we better go through here and see what our children are up to."
"Yeah, we should" I nod. We then head to the living room and play with the children for a while.
XXX
Both of our families are here now so I'm just helping cook in the kitchen. I'm just sorting out the vegetables when Brittany walks into the room and walks over to me.
"Do you see that up there?" Brittany says while pointing to the ceiling.
"Yeah" I smile as I notice the mistletoe.
"Good" she says before leaning in and kissing me.
"Really?" Brittany's brother asks, appearing in the kitchen. "I'm babysitting all 4 of your children and you two are in here making out" he shakes his head.
"They're your nieces and nephews, Ben. I would hope it wasn't that much of a chore to look after them" Brittany points out.
"It's not but I'm not getting to kiss my girlfriend right now so why do you get to kiss your wife" Ben points out.
"I'll come back now" Brittany states while heading towards the door.
"I'm kidding, just grab me a beer from the fridge and I'll go back and play with my nieces and nephews" Ben smiles at Brittany.
"Ok" Brittany shrugs before getting Ben a beer.
"Thank you" Ben says while taking the beer and heading back to the living room to look after the kids.
"So, do you need some help babe?" Brittany asks as she wraps her arms around my waist from behind as I go back to preparing dinner.
"I'm ok just now" I say while briefly turning my head to smile at her.
"Ladies keep it clean please when there are other people in here" Emma points out as Brittany makes no attempt to move away from me.
"Mind your own business Emma" Brittany tells her.
Once all the food preparation is done and the food is all cooked, we all sit down together to eat. Some of the smaller children are in the study sleeping though and we'll feed them later. It's a little squashing around the table since there are so many of us but I like that because I like that we have a big family and we can all spend Christmas together. It also gives Brittany an excuse to practically sit on my lap to eat even though none of our family buys the excuse.
"I was thinking once we've all eaten, we could play a game together" Brittany suggests. "Aiden actually got some cool games or we could play charades which Santana got me for Christmas."
"You got your wife a game for Christmas?" Jason asks me.
"I got her lots of other stuff too but I remembered her saying that she used to play charades all the time at Christmas when she was younger but she lost the cards for it so I thought I would get her something special that reminded her of her childhood" I reply.
"And I thought it was really sweet" Brittany says while turning her head to kiss me.
"Ok, let's play charades once dinner is finished then" Karen states.
"I think we should play it in teams of families so I'm with Brittany and our kids and you can all team together in your little families" I suggest.
"That's not really fair though because I would only have one other person in my team which is my girlfriend unlike you who would have a group of 6" Ben tells me.
"Yeah and I would only have Brittany's dad to play with me since all of my children would rather team up with their partners than their parents" Karen points out.
"Ok well you can all team up with whoever you want to but Brittany, Aiden, Ella, Mia and Josh are all off limits because they're on my team" I tell everyone.
"Somehow that wasn't a surprise to us" my mom says while laughing. Once we all finish our dinner, we get tidied up before heading to the living room for our game.
"It was your idea Brittany so you kick us off" James tells his daughter.
"Ok" Brittany says while drawing a card. We're playing it that each team nominates someone to act out whatever is on the card and the other teammates guess it and will get a point if they guess it correctly within the time. Whichever team has the most points at the end wins.
"Take it away babe" I say and then Brittany starts to act it out. "Ok, it's a TV show" I say. She then starts pointing to Artie and I. "Um…" I really don't know.
"What are you and Artie?" Brittany states.
"No talking please" Emma smirks at Brittany.
"Come on, my teammates are 4 people under the age of 4 and Santana. I need to be able to talk a little bit" Brittany states.
"Ok fair enough for the kids because they probably don't understand the game but why am I named in there?" I ask.
"Because you can be a little slow sometimes when you get overexcited" Brittany smiles at me. Sometimes I do get too hyped up and say some silly things.
"Fine, a little bit of talking is allowed" my dad says.
"Ok, so it's Artie and I" I say while thinking about it. "Uh…business partners?" I guess.
"It's one word baby and that is two" Brittany tells me.
"I really don't know then" I say honestly after guessing some other stupid answer.
"I know mommy" Aiden states while waving his hand in the air.
"You can shout it out sweetheart" Brittany tells Aiden.
"Friends" Aiden beams brightly. He's never seen the show but he knows Brittany and I love it.
"Excellent. I knew you were the smart one of the family" Brittany says while kissing Aiden's cheek.
"I'm smart mom" Aiden smiles at me.
"Yes, you are but I don't like how mommy doesn't think I'm smart" I tease.
"Ok that's one point to team Santana" my sister says while noting down the score. "Ok, who's next" she says and then the next group go. After a little bit it's back to my team again and it's Aiden's turn.
"Do you need someone to tell you what it says?" I ask my son and he nods his head. "Ok" I say while leaning over to take the card for him.
"No-no, I'll tell him because we don't need two people from the same team giving out the clues" my dad says while helping Aiden with his card. "Ok, it's song guys" he says.
"It's this" Aiden states while holding a barbie up in the air.
"It's barbie girl" I shout out.
"Yeah" Aiden screams delightedly as he runs over to me and high fives me.
"Wow, we are really wiping the floor with you all" I point out.
As the game ends, my team are indeed victorious much to the annoyance of everyone else since I was rubbing their noses in it. Everyone is away home now and the kids are now in bed so it's just Brittany and I left in the living room.
"Hey do you want to have another glass of wine and maybe watch a movie together?" Brittany asks me as she sits down next to me.
"Sounds good, I'll get the wine and you pick the movie. I would pick the movie but you've seen way more on Netflix than I have so I'd hate to put something on that you've already cheated on me with" I smirk at her.
"After 5 months, you still can't let it go?" she asks with a laugh.
"Cheating is a hard thing to swallow" I shrug before going to get us some wine. I then quickly join Brittany on the couch again. "Have you found something then that you haven't seen?" I ask.
"I have and see this," she says while pointing up and down her body so I nod, "this won't be something you'll see for a very long time again if you make any more Netflix cheating jokes."
"Ok, fair enough" I say with a laugh as we get the movie started.
"If it helps, I give you permission to Netflix cheat on me one night if you want" she tells me. "Only Netflix cheating though because I don't want any real cheating" she adds.
"Yeah, there's no chance I'm going to cheat on you. You're the most amazing person on this planet so I wouldn't give that up for anything" I smile.
"I feel the exact same about you" she says before kissing me. "Now let's get this movie started because the quicker I get bored of it the quicker I can start coming onto you" she smirks. It's actually a recurring theme that we have going on because more often than not Brittany bores easily with a movie so she ends up flirting with me half way through that we ultimately end up stopping the movie and just go to bed.
"Or we could just cut out the middle man and do it right here right now" I suggest.
"Ok" Brittany laughs.