Chapter 11!

Warnings: Smut, some angst

Disclaimer in Chapter 1

Enjoy!

Sir

Chapter 11

Sir's Confessions

No wonder the locals call this place a fortress," I said, grabbing Sir's hand and stepping out the car, "This place is huge, and it's like Fort Knox…"

"It is," Sir simply said, closing the door and placing a hand on the small of my back, "Let's go greet our hosts."

The Fortress was a sprawling three story beach house, that was a beautiful blue color with white windows. This fortress only had one way to enter and leave; by the main road which had two secure gates to get by, all of them had armed guards at them. Something beside beautiful coastal trees and flowers was in between the gates because Sir was a little irritated, his eyebrow twitched and he was filled with tension, which left him, once we got to the front of the fortress.

A woman, dressed in a pair of jeans and a polo shirt was waiting for us by the door. She gave us a smile and said, "Welcome, I'm Freda, I oversee the caretaking of the house, Heidi and Diesel are waiting for you outside, please, follow me."

I was afraid to step on the carpet that line the floors, they must have been worth a fortune. Freda led us past sitting rooms, living rooms, dining rooms and pieces of décor that were priceless and led us to a set of French double doors that were wide open and exposed the backyard to us. The backyard as a lush tropical paradise in the middle of New England, flowers of every single color were in bloom, along with bushes and trees that let off a sweet perfume. The stone pathway led to other places like a tennis court, an Olympic size pool and a large gazebo, which had a shot square table in it, with a white cloth, loaded with food that was waiting for us. Heidi and Diesel were by a fire pit, talking in low voices, and organizing bundles of drift wood in the pit.

"Heidi, Diesel," Freda said, walking us over to the couple, "Carlos and Stephanie have arrived, shall I get the wine that's paired with the bake?"

"Yes, thank you, Freda," Diesel said, wrapping an arm around Heidi and leading her over to Sir and I, "Stephanie, Carlos, welcome to the fortress."

"I'm so glad you two are here," Heidi said, with a soft smile, I noticed that she was almost…lucid, what was wrong with her? "Dinner is waiting for us, would you two like to take a seat?"

Sir noticed it too, because he gave a look to Diesel, who returned the look with one of his own. Nothing was said, but Sir nodded his head, slightly and said, "That sounds nice, it does smell good."

"Samuel and Diana run the kitchen," Diesel said, leading Heidi over to the table and sitting her down, "They do know how to cook, they made everything tonight."

Diesel, Sir and I talked, while Heidi seem to drift in and out of it, it seemed it took all her energy to focus on her food. I said a few things to her, but she only responded with a soft noise or a yes or no. We ate delicious lobster, fish, clams, vegetables and it paired nicely with the white wine that Freda poured for us all, except Heidi, she gave her a glass of juice instead. Freda didn't look so concern with Heidi, it was like she was used to it, used to her current state. What was going on in this secured fortress?

After dinner was over, we went over to the fire pit and sat down on the circular couches that surrounded it. Sir and I sat beside each other while Heidi sat on the other couch and Diesel lit the fire pit. He sat down beside Heidi and let her crawl in his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck and going still. We talked silently for a bit before Diesel pulled Heidi out of his lap, stood up, turned to Sir and asked, "Can I…can I talk to you for a minute or two."

Sir got up and said, "Of course you can, Diesel."

Diesel nodded his head and then led Sir away from the fire pit, over to the garden for their private talk. I sighed and stood up, going over to the firepit and poking at it with a stick. In the darkness, I could see Sir and Diesel talking, it must have been a serious conversation, because Sir seemed tensed. I heard a noise from beside me and found Heidi sitting up, looking into the fire, with a glazed expression. I put the stick down and walked over to Heidi, sitting down beside and saying, "Hey, are you okay, Heidi?"

"Master…he's so good to me, I don't deserve him…." Heidi said, in a soft voice, turning to me, "How does he put up with me? I'm so broken, and all the pieces aren't there, I'm damaged goods."

"Hey, sweetheart, you are not damaged, why would you say that?" I said, turning to Heidi and giving her a look, "Heidi, why would ever say such a thing?"

"It's true!" Heidi said, tears were forming in her eyes, "I can't…function, I work 70 hours a week to forget, but I can't forget, and now…"

"Now what?" I asked, as Heidi fell apart beside me, "Heidi, what's wrong? Is there anything I can do? Is this about the phone conversation we had a while back, the one you hung up on me."

Heidi nodded her head and said, "I'll never have a normal life! What can I do?! Daddy and Master can only do so much, I can't function! I just want it all to end!"

I grabbed Heidi and wrapped my arms around her, as she sobbed loudly. She clung to me, whimpering words and mumbling to herself. I didn't know what was wrong with her, I couldn't help her, I felt so powerless in the situation…

"It's alright, Steph," Diesel said to me, from my right side, "I got her, come on, Princess, it's okay, I'm here now."

I let go of Heidi and stood up, watching Diesel pick up Heidi in his arms and carry her over to the fortress. He looked over his shoulder and said, "Give me a minute, I'm going to put her to bed and have Freda watch out for her."

"What happened, Babe?" Sir asked me, as I sat down again, staring into the fire, "Did something happen?"

"She had a breakdown, talking about being broken, it was scary," I said, as Sir sat down beside me, "I read her blogs, follow her, and she writes with such an air of confidence, she talks like she owns the room she's in, just this morning, she was nothing but smiles and sunshine but tonight, she could barely string two words together."

"She self medicated herself," Diesel said, walking over to the fire pit and sitting down, "Took two anti-anxiety pills and an anti-depressant. Freda caught her too late, I was amazed she could walk and talk. I tried to talk her out of the dinner tonight, but, she was having none of it, she really likes you, Steph, and I thought, maybe if she had someone else, besides me and her father to talk to, she would get better."

I blinked and asked, "Heidi's depressed? What happened to her, what's wrong?"

"10 years ago," Diesel said, leaning forward, cracking his knuckles, "When Heidi was 21, she disappeared, for three years straight, no one knew where she was, her father, Edward Evanston sent out a search party to find her. She was found, wandering down a road, naked, except for some kind of chastity belt, covered in whip marks, bruises and mumbling about being a good girl and behaving."

I grabbed Sir's hand and whispered, "Why would anybody kidnap Heidi?"

"From what her father could get from her, through therapy sessions, she had been taken from school by a group of human traffickers, on the order of some man, they were to train her, until she was the perfect…love slave and bring her to the man. We don't know who the man is, but we did get the traffickers. They were…very thorough in their training with Heidi. If she hadn't escaped when she did, I doubt she would be here today, they just about broke her mind and soul. We never found out who the man was, he was that careful."

I leaned into Sir, my eyes wide with shock, how did Heidi survive, how did she manage to get past that kind of hell?

"You," I said, looking over to Diesel, "You're the reason why Heidi can function normally."

"Well, almost normally, Heidi had been in therapy for a year when I met her, on her father's orders. I was the one who found her, all those years back, I never met her, but I told Edward where he could find her. He had me track her down, anyway, Edward came to me, begging me to help Heidi. She couldn't live without someone guiding her through life. She threw herself into her work, barely ate, barely slept, took too many pills and was on the road to suicide. He told me that she needed someone to dominate her, because that's what she craves. That's what she was hardwired to want. Up until Edward's request, I was never into this kind of stuff, this Dom/sub thing, I had to study it.

"And how is she, since you've been her Master?" Sir asked, crossing his arms.

"She's been great, actually, she's been happy and healthy, only taking her medication when needed and working less," Diesel said, "But all that changed, about 8 months ago, when Heidi started to get gifts from someone. Collars, leashes, anything that shows signs of ownership, Heidi received them, along with threatening letters. It's from the man who had her kidnapped all those years ago, He's back, he wants her again and it's fucked Heidi up in a big way, I'm afraid for her sanity."

"Which is why you want to hire me?" Sir asked, earning a head nod from Diesel, wait what?!

"I'm going out of town in two months, business," Diesel said, shrugging his shoulders, "I want you to take care of Heidi, while I'm gone, she'll move to Trenton, she can live with you if you want, or, she can stay in a hotel, but I don't want her alone. I thought about letting her stay with her father, but she needs a Dom to tell her what to do, she'll listen to you, Carlos. Just don't do anything too weird, or anything sexual, she still has issues."

Sir nodded his head and said, "I'll take care of her to the best of my abilities, I know Babe will want to help in any way she can."

"Of course, Sir, Heidi is a good friend, I want to help her in any way I can," I said, looking over to Diesel and Sir, "How long are you going to be gone?"

"As long as I need to be," Diesel said, looking into the fire, "I just want to find this asshole, he is destroying our lives."

(~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~)

We left the fortress late at night, the weight of what Diesel told us heavy on our minds. It seemed to have affect Sir more than me. He was silent all the way home. When we made our way upstairs to the master bedroom, Sir grabbed me and kissed me softly, running his hands over my head. He hugged me tight to him and then said in a low voice, "Strip, Babe, and then get on the bed."

I gave Sir a look, but did what I was told to do, taking off the sun dress I wore and then kicking off the slip on sandals I wore that night. I climbed on the bed and then turned on my back, looking over to Sir, who began to take off his clothes. Once he was gloriously nude, he walked over to the bed and climbed on it, looming over me. I looked into his eyes and asked, "Sir?"

"Not tonight, Stephanie, it's just Carlos," Sir said, leaning down and kissing me on the lips, "No Dom or sub tonight, just us…"

I nodded my head and said, "Yes, Carlos, only you and I tonight."

Carlos smiled and kissed me again, his tongue mapping out my mouth, his hands running up and down my arms. I pressed back against the kiss, letting Carlos, not Sir, take the lead. We stayed like that for a long time, just kissing and caressing one another, before Carlos pulled away from me and said, "I'm going to make love to you, Stephanie, is that alright?"

"Of course it is," I said, sitting up on my elbows, "You are always welcome to my body, Carlos, I…"

I looked away from Carlos, the words clogged in my throat and emotions filling my head. I felt Carlos turn my head and then said, in a soft voice, "Stephanie, Babe? What's wrong?"

"I love you," I said softly, looking up at the man in front of me, "I loved before we started this relationship thing, but being with you, in such an intimate way, it's only solidified my love, Carlos."

I was afraid that Carlos would bolt, or laugh in my face. The look he was giving me was so intense that it scared me. He let go of my chin and ran his hand down my thigh, lifting it up. I let out a gasp, as he entered me swiftly, never letting down that intense look.

"Say it again, Stephanie," Carlos growled, pulling out of me and pushing back, "Say it…again."

"I love you," I whispered, reaching out for him and pulling him down, "I love you, I love you, I love you."

"Again!" Carlos growled, thrusting in and out of me, "Tell me again!"

"Oh! I love you, Carlos!" I cried out as he sent me flying, "I only love you!"

We've had our share of passionate sex before, but nothing like this, nothing that had my heart soaring and my mind whirling. Carlos leaned down and whispered in my ear, "Te Amo, Babe, Only you."

I knew enough Spanish to know what that meant; Carlos loved me, he loved all of me, the good and the bad. I gripped him tighter and whispered, "I love you so much, Carlos Manoso, never let go of me."

(~~~~~~~~~~~~~~)

We lay afterwards, naked on the bed, me laying on top of Carlos, while he played with my velvet collar. He looked down at me and then sat up, pulling me up into his lap. He unhooked the collar from neck and placed it in my hands saying, "We don't have to do this, if you don't want to, Stephanie, we can have a normal relationship, if you want."

I looked down at the collar and then back at him, before confessing, "I feel very naked, without the collar, why are you doing this, Carlos?"

Carlos wrapped his arms around me and then said, "It was what Diesel said to me, while we were talking. He told me that, in a heartbeat, he would sell his soul to give Heidi the life she deserved. To have a relationship, without the BDSM life attached to it, that's what he really wants. But he can't have it, because of what Heidi went through all those years back. It's almost as if she's permanently changed for life. She probably is but Diesel lives this life because he loves her. Told me that he fell in love with her at first sight, and would have given her the world if she asked. If she had asked him to make her kneel at his feet, then he would do it, because that's what she craves."

I gripped the velvet collar tightly in my hands, looking down at it. I sighed and said, "So…She's one of those people who need to live this life, right? She didn't have the luxury to choose, she was forced into it…"

"Yeah," Carlos said, rubbing my arms, "I used to be like her, exposed to events that could change a person's life. It happened to me, you know, when I got out of the Ranger's school, and was chosen to go into Special Ops. I saw things that changed me, I did things that changed me…and when I got out, I couldn't cope, I gave up rights to a child who didn't know me, my ex didn't want me to even get close to her, she thought I was a monster. I couldn't bear the thought of my family seeing me like this, and so I turned to drugs and any other vice that would take my mind off of these awful thoughts. I remember, 8 years ago, standing over the railing of a bridge and imaging what it would be like, if I just threw my in the river below. No one would miss me, no one would care about a damaged man. I almost died that night, almost committed suicide."

"What stopped you?" I asked, turning to look up at him, "Was it..?"

"Sarah," Carlos said, a smile on his face, "Sarah talked me off the bridge, in the middle of a cold night. She took me to her home and helped me in any way she could. She knew how hard it was for me to give up control to anyone, but managed to take control of my life, to get me off of the drugs and into therapy. She got me the help I needed, and in return I submitted to her, let her take care of me. She was there for me, for a full year, before she cut my strings and let me go. Told me I was only her sub for a spell so that I could heal, Now the rest was up to me. I don't even know how to repay her for the kindness she gave to me. How do you thank a person who saved your life?"

I sat in silence, not knowing the answer, Carlos didn't know the answer either because he sighed and said, "That's what Heidi has to live with, not knowing how to repay back the ultimate gift of kindness that can be given to you. Heidi battles with knowing she and Diesel can't have a relationship that's typical, something that Diesel craves. They've tried to have a 'normal' relationship, Heidi overdosed on her valium because she couldn't handle her stress. We're given a luxury; we choose this lifestyle, together. We could end it, whenever we want to, without mental repercussions. So, if you want a regular relationship with me, I'm fine with it, we can get rid of the ropes, the collars, the leashes, everything, if that's what you want, I love you Babe, and that's all that matters."

I looked up at Carlos and then kissed him, before saying, "My neck is getting cold, Carlos, put my collar back on. I think, with love mixed up in this business, it's going to be a nice, wild ride."

"It might be," Carlos said, grabbing the collar and putting it back on me, "Better, Babe?"

"Yes, Sir," I said, touching the collar, "I feel so much better now…."

TBC…

Wow, what an emotional roller coaster! See you next chapter, leave a review, please.