Disclaimer: I do not own Fairytail.

Summary: What it means to be Zeref Dragneel

The man looked at the other man with a look of confidence. Anyone would look confident if they had just won a battle with the evilest man ever, Zeref on the other hand looked tired and ready to commit another futile attempt at suicide. "Ha! You see that? I won!" Natsu said with a look of triumph.

"Yeah, I guess you did." Zeref said tiredly. Zeref looked up at the other man and managed an,

"I'm so sorry," He choked out with a strangled sob. The question was, what wasn't he sorry for? "I'm sorry for wrecking your life." Zeref said Natsu raised an eyebrow. "Can I please hold your hand?" Zeref asked, dreading the answer. "I can't say what I need to say if you don't." Natsu was hesitant but slowly let the other man's fingers curl around his own. Zeref held the hand to his chest and looked up into the other man's eyes. "I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry for hurting your friends and for ruining your life. I'm sorry for being born, and most of all for being selfish!" If only Zeref hadn't been so selfish. For bringing his brother back because of his own selfish loneliness. "I'm sorry for bringing you back as a monster… but I couldn't let you be robbed of the right to live. I get you must hate me but we're family!"

"We're not family." Natsu's words brought unimaginable pain to Zeref's heart. He felt as if he were being ripped apart from the inside out. "We may be related but we are not family." Natsu said firmly. Zeref supposed he was right. After all, he didn't know Natsu at all. Zeref remembered little Natsu. The younger brother he had adored so much. He adored his younger brother. He had always loved his brother. He loved him more than he loved himself. That's why he gave up everything for him. he gave up everything because he remembered holding his tiny body in his arms. And he remembered how Natsu had smiled delightedly up at him for the first time. He remembered the tuft of pink hair on the top of his head, and how his laugh had rung out like a bell of pure joy. Zeref remembered everything clearly from the moment he saw Natsu's face for the first time until he held his lifeless body with his chest still, and his face pale. After that, everything was a haze. Because nothing mattered anymore. Zeref had wanted things to matter. That's why he revived him. to say they weren't family was like ripping his heart out and crushing it in front of him. Zeref felt his eyes water and he wiped his tears away. He cleared his throat and began to speak slowly.

"You're right. I don't know you. And if I don't know you then how can we be family? I knew the little boy I revived… I wish I'd had more time to be with that little boy. And I wish I knew the man he became… the man I never got the chance to meet. Because you're not little Natsu. Your salamander of Fairytail… and he made a life without me. I'm not in your memory. You don't even know me. I'm not a memory or even a figment of your life… I'm the past. And the past is just that. A place where you never go in the same way you did ever again… as they say, you never see the same water in a river twice. It's okay that I'm the past… I'm used to being worthless." Zeref said with glassy eyes. He tried to blink more tears away.

"You're not worthless!" Natsu shouted, squeezing Zeref's hand tightly. just then Zeref saw Natsu looking behind him at someone. It was obvious that he wasn't paying attention to Zeref anymore. a blonde girl was behind him. Zeref thought her name was Lucy. Zeref laid back on the floor and cried softly. Lucy grinned at them, her eyes big and cheerful.

"Natsu, you defeated him!" She exclaimed happily.

"Sure did!" Natsu said. Lucy looked over at Zeref's form and asked,

"Is he okay?" Natsu shrugged and asked Zeref that same question.

"Are you okay?" he asked. Zeref did not respond and only continued his half-hearted sobs. Natsu looked somewhat concerned but shrugged it off and turned back to Lucy. He kissed her shyly, blushing furiously. Lucy smiled slightly at him.

"No one wants to see that." Mavis said with a sly grin, walking up behind them. However, the couple wasn't paying attention to her. they merely left laughing and talking. Zeref slowly got up feeling forgotten and made his way through the wreckage. Zeref didn't know when it had happened. When he became dead inside. Mavis walked up behind him. She gave him a sympathetic smile and put her hand on his arm. "He'll come around." Mavis said. Zeref shook his head and turned to face her.

"No, he won't. He'll never see me as a brother. To him I will always be the villain who hurt his friends and ruined his life. Never the loving brother that saved it. To him I will always be the monster that has no soul. Never the brother that sold it to the devil to see his warming smile one last time… and that's okay. I will not interfere or meddle… I will simply be. I am the past he will never know or understand or ever want to remember. I am not a shadow… I do not exist in his present at all, because I am the past." For the first time a small, sad smile broke across his features. He looked her straight in the eye and said, "I don't need to be anything but the past. The past does not change or meddle but waits with silent hope that it will be remembered. And so, I will do that as well. I will wait patiently and hope… hope that one day I might be lucky enough to be a distant memory… that is what it means to be Zeref Dragneel." And with that he turned, slipping into the darkness. Just like a memory that had been forgotten.

A/N I'm so sorry I haven't updated in a while, but right now I'm getting a new story for you guys written. I plan to post the first chapter... some time in the near future, see what you guys think. I'm just working out a few kinks, making sure everything makes some semblance of sense, and actually finishing up the story. My hopes for it are that it be over 40,000 words, but it will end when it ends. Sorry for the short chapter, but if you guys are interested. This chapter here was actually the start of the Dragneel Brothers. I planned on it being a oneshot that I wrote late at night on my little screen... then I did it here, on my computer, and now I'm posting it for you. Anyway, I planned on this being a oneshot thing, and it was for a long time, but then, I got a burst of inspiration and did like... well, over 22. Now then, you probably won't see me updating until Thanksgiving where I have a special for you. ;). Thanks for reading, reviews and constructive criticism appreciated. Sorry for any errors and sorry if this isn't the best oneshot. It was 1 A.M and I was typing like I was texting, which is one of the stupidest things I've ever done, and I was trying to get it over 1,000 words... yeah, and for those of you who are like, "Hey, where's Zeref in this one?" Well, he'd love to be here, but right now he's fighting the black dragon. Don't worry, he's okay... for now (evil chuckle). Anyway, he'll get back to you all soon, bye!