Bloodline
Chapter 16: On your left
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I am not entirely sure how close the Central Park is to the Avengers Tower but when the Grand Central Station is kinda below the Tower the park isn't that far away. 18 minutes going by google maps. Steve and Bucky will be faster.
Autumn_Froste did the beta and made sure Bucky and Steve used their typical accent and style which I can't imitate yet. (Yeah, sorry XD German freaky girl here XD)
And now also with the proper Russian in it translated for me by Dectie ^^ Thank you very much ^^
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Barnes was somehow glad he had been able to avoid the issue of sleeping next to Natasha for quite a while now. This also gave her the chance of a restful night and him the time to get used to being a father and learning more and more about their son, but it had gotten awkward and frustrating being so close to her without the intimacy his body craved. An intimacy she would surely despise after all he put her through. Still he enjoyed the time with his son, learning more every day and also recovering memories of who he had once been - the older brother taking care of his infant sibling.
It was long past midnight when James watched the city below him that seemed restless as well. Lights hurried across the streets and the noise was audible despite the reinforced windows and the elevation from all the life down there. His mind relaxed while the lack of sleep started to take its toll once more. A headache formed behind his eyes as he closed them.
The moment he opened them once again the city had changed. The buildings weren't nearly as tall and somehow didn't fit into this century. Snow was covering the rooftops and the cold wind fought against his armor, a chill running deep beneath his skin. There was calmness inside him, the feeling of power, of something going exactly as planned.
"Позволишь мне выстрелить на этот раз? (Will you let me take the shot this time?)" A female voice asked from behind him. He knew that voice but it lacked the warm embrace he usually felt. A hint of it was there, like a promise beneath the sharpness.
James turned around to see Natasha leaning against the wall behind her, the rifle already in hand as she smiled at him. Youth and the eagerness to please was shining out from her eyes, fire and fascination, and that coppery feeling of blood and death. "Думаешь, ты к этому готова, паучок? (You think you're up for it, little spider?)" He heard himself say. There was a boyish note to the way he responded but it was almost entirely shadowed by the voice of a tutor trying to decide if the student was ready or not.
She did not respond, only walked towards the edge of the rooftop they were standing on. Crouching once she was visible from the street below. Oh Hell, she was gorgeous. All that precision and grace in her movements and that female allure… Only watching her was like a promise.
Inside the memory James felt himself respond, yet not to the extent he would nowadays. Part of his soul was still frozen from his last cryo-sleep and the knowledge of how good they really had been together was dulled and only a soft caress like a memory forcefully forgotten, but he could feel their potential.
He knew it was wrong, not part of his mission, but when he looked into those piercing eyes accented by the smug little smile of hers the Winter Soldier knew he would make her his. Soon…
They didn't have to wait long for their target to arrive. Bodyguards were shielding him from an easy shot and the two assassins knew the exit route would be much more difficult if they acted too early. So they waited for the politician to enter his suite in the hotel. Even before he turned on the lights in his rooms Natalia had positioned her rifle to have the best shot at the window. Curtains obscured the view, but it wouldn't matter to her. She was pure precision. "Готова (Ready)," she stated and laid her finger gently onto the trigger. She knew he was nodding behind her, giving her the okay. The Black Widow breathed calmly and measured the time between the heartbeats. Then her target's head moved into the view of her scope and she moved her finger slightly, pulling the trigger. The politician fell to ground, dead. "Цель устранена (Target eliminated)," she said before picking up the shell casing from the cloth she had laid out on the ground and quickly cleaning up whatever trace there might be of them.
The Winter Soldier hadn't moved since then, still leaning against the wall as he watched her.
"Ваша оценка? (Your evaluation?)" she wanted to know as he untangled his arms that had been crossed until now. The Black Widow knew he wouldn't give her an answer. She might be able to get a glance at his report of her after he had delivered it to their handlers, but she didn't need his praise. She knew how good she was.
Yet this time it was different, he was different. Her tutor walked towards her, taking off his muzzle and goggles. The Winter Soldier saw her stopping in her movement, waiting. He came close, too close. The Asset watched her pupils dilate and he was merely a few inches away from her face. Raising his metal arm he gently put his hand underneath her chin, ordering her to look up to him.
A familiar warmth spread across her belly. The Black Widow didn't know why it was so familiar but she enjoyed it nonetheless. Playing her tricks she batted her eyelashes, her mouth opened slightly, giving him an innocent and also seductive invitation and waiting for him to respond by uniting their lips. They had never done this before but somehow she knew already how his mouth would feel on hers. Demanding, brutal and passionate. As he minimized the distance between them she closed her eyes, feeling his breath on her cheeks, waiting…
"Великолепно. (Magnificent.)" He whispered in her ear, answering her earlier question.
His voice sent shivers through her body and made her legs go weak. No one ever before had managed that. God, how she longed to fall into those arms, but she was the Black Widow and she couldn't allow him to become her only weakness. Suddenly the coolness of his metal fingers was gone as was the warmth he radiated. She opened her eyes and looked at the open door to the stairs. Did he just…? Well, two could play that game. With a smile Natalia followed him, already working out a way to make the Winter Soldier melt with lust.
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James tried to calm his racing heart as the flashback ended. He had no idea how much time had passed but he could see the sun beginning to rise at the horizon. The glass showed him his own reflection and he had to grimace. He was a ghost. Finally the name he got from so many people fit. There was no makeup needed to darken the skin around his eyes. How long would he be able to continue like this?
A sound behind him made the man straighten, trying to hide his uneasiness. She was there, standing behind him, glorious and beautiful in the silk nightgown that covered everything but hid nothing.
"It's still a little early, Natalia. You should rest." He offered while he looked at her reflection in the glass.
She shook her head. Something seemed to bother her.
"What's wrong?" He wasn't sure if he should ask, but if communication could help her it was worth the shot. "Nightmare?"
Her eyes darted to his, trying to read him. This was unusual. He normally didn't dare to invade her privacy that much, so this question took her off guard. "Not exactly."
But it was the dream she just had. Well, he could sympathize. The memory he just relived had hit him harder than he expected. "It was just a dream. You'll forget it soon enough."
She looked him deep into the eyes as she whispered. "But what if I don't want to forget?"
He didn't understand at first, so he simply countered with a smile: "So it was a good dream, eh?"
Natalia stared at a point far behind him, her gaze unreadable before she quietly answered. "Magnificent."
At that moment their son demanded attention and she seamlessly changed back into being a mother, turning around to look after the child.
"I'll take care of him." Bucky offered.
Natasha glanced over her shoulder. She looked more tired than she wanted to let on. "Really?"
"I can use the practice," he said with a grin as he walked into the nursery.
Natasha mirrored him from a few minutes before, looking out into the mess of streets and buildings while she thought about what just happened. Did he realize he had spoken out loud while he had his flashback? Natasha wondered while she listened to the father calming down their son in the other room. She had woken up to his words and the memory had come back to her with a crushing force that made her heart ache. It hurt her a little that he didn't respond to her answer the way she had imagined. His face had shown more shock than lust and it frustrated her. He only needs time. She said to herself while slowly returning to bed. But please, don't let it be an eternity...
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He was watching the sunrise when his enhanced hearing picked up Steve rumbling about in the kitchen for something to drink before the man went out for his morning run around the Central Park, literally around the whole thing. That made Bucky smile and also gave him an idea.
"If anyone needs me JARVIS, I'm out for an hour." The Captain politely informed the AI, although it was neither anything uncommon nor would it matter to anyone since - unless aliens attacked - Sunday was sacred to the team and no one got up before ten.
"Mister Rogers, will you be taking the motorcycle or should get a car ready for you to take you to the desired location?"
Confusion made him halt in his movement of closing the fridge. "I normally jog over to park as warm up, JARVIS. You know this."
"I am under the impression someone would like to join you."
"Who?"
Before the Captain could finish his question Barnes appeared from behind the corner. "Can I tag along? I think I still need a watchdog but quite frankly I could use some fresh air and exercise."
"You're allowed to leave the tower?" Steve was a little bit unsure— not that he didn't like the idea of the two of them spending some time together, but he didn't want Bucky to get into trouble. Since his friend had gotten here, he never attempted to go outside; still too afraid to hurt anyone in case it went wrong, so this was an undiscussed topic.
"I have worked out a protocol with Mr Stark for this. You will have to carry a communications device in case of an emergency, but otherwise Mr Barnes is allowed to leave the tower with someone at his side." The AI decided not to use his master's direct words which included 'ass' and 'on the line.' "I will provide you with a bracelet that Mr Stark invented. A modified version of a fitness tracker, nearly indestructible and with all extra features able to fit into a smartwatch. Still a prototype version but this might be a good opportunity to check all functions." Was there excitement between the lines? Or did the AI just want to collect data like any other big company tracking GPS and other personal things?
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Bucky and Steve ran side by side, in sync even, as they passed other early morning joggers, people with dogs and women with strollers. It was good that the Winter Soldier hadn't been in the papers, so no one recognized him for who he was. Since he also wore a jacket and a glove over his left hand no one would grow suspicious. Occasionally someone would turn around with disbelief on the face but that merely because they had the luck of seeing Captain America in person.
The two enjoyed it so much that none of them said a word until they reached a bridge on which Steve started to slow down and finally stopped right at the top of it.
They hadn't even broken a sweat, their breathing only mildly accelerated. It was the beautiful scenery that had grasped Steve every time he passed it, and now Bucky was taking it in as well. He closed his eyes and listened to the birds and trees whispering. The leaves absorbed almost all of the stress and noise a city like that held. It was calm, serene and it gave them a moment to think and reflect.
Steve had been a helping hand these past weeks, offering without pushing too hard. His eyes filled with wonder and delight as he watched his best friend slowly recovering from both his physical and emotional wounds. The second ones were a much slower progress and he could see Bucky struggling often because he had simply forgotten how it was to not be used as an asset to kill. Some everyday things he still had to get used to. HYDRA had only taught him what would be needed to finish a mission such as weapons, transportation, changes in politics and geography or similar. Now every new meal the man tried was something new to him. Steve understood that all too well. In their time they used boil everything. Now it had much more taste with all the fat and salt. The world was noisier, more rushed and technologically advanced.
James seemed to do a very good job at adapting, better than Steve at least during his first weeks. Of course, the Winter Soldier had been thawed from time to time, but who knew how he had seen the world behind that goggles, or what he even remembered from his missions once they had wiped him clean again.
Steve tried to find something they could talk about. There had been many short conversations until Bucky had slowly retreated every time as if he didn't feel worthy or well enough yet to deal with more. They both enjoyed it and the Winter Soldier had gotten more and more used to it again. The medication Bruce had given him seemed to help him regain memories slowly. The best moments for Steve were when he told a story with a different ending and Bucky corrected him with a wide grin until they both broke out in laughter. The Captain looked down into the water when a paper ship passed underneath the bridge. He searched for the creator and quickly found a child running through the grass with his loving parents right after him, telling him to slow down or he might fall. Even from the distance his sharp eyes saw the wedding rings. Well, there was a topic.
James knew that something was coming before Steve even opened his mouth. It seemed to have taken him a lot of time to think this one up, so Bucky waited for the words curiously.
"Our mothers would be turning over in their graves if they saw us." The Captain dead-panned.
James smiled at that. "What, ehe 100 year old virgin and the unwed man with a child? Well, one of us waited too long, the other rushed things a little. I think when you throw us in a mix we are on a pretty good way."
Steve grinned and shook his head. "You always saw things from the brighter angle."
"What?" Bucky laughed warm-heartedly and clapped his friend on the back. "You got no one special? Having all the muscles and prestige must give you a good advantage."
"Well, there is… my neighbor. Sharon Carter. But I am not sure about that right now since you showed up again." He saw Bucky's confusion and continued. "She told me she was a nurse, but when you shot Fury in my apartment she came running in her pyjamas and a weapon drawn. She was S.H.I.E.L.D. and ordered to keep an eye on me. Once that broke down she started a career with the CIA. We text 'cause she's busy cleaning up our mess in DC."
He remembered that night all too well but didn't want to focus on the dark aspects of Steve's words. "Sounds like a girl fit for the Captain. Her name is Carter?" He asked curiously.
"Must be a coincidence. She didn't mention a family relation with Peggy the few times I dropped her name. And she DID flirt with me." He thought about his terrible attempts at reciprocating and gave a weary sigh.
"Well, since she isn't your secret granddaughter then, you should give it a go. A woman who has success in a profession usually dominated by men she must have the guts to scold you when you come home late. A perfect match." Once he felt well enough his first mission would be bringing the two of them together.
"Look who's talking!" Steve slapped him on the head mockingly. "You went straight for the one woman on earth who can match your skills."
"You mean the one woman who is able to leave the bed alive once I let myself go?" He saw his friend blushing at those words. A bold statement but the truth nonetheless. "Flexible and with so much endurance even my enhanced body can't come up with…"
Steve closed his eyes and held his hands over his ears. "God, stop it. We're in public! That's embarrassing. What if someone hears you say such things?"
"Oh, come on. From what I've learned about this century people are not that prudish anymore. The internet is full of porn."
Steve decided not to engage into that argument any further. "At least make her an honorable woman."
"You're serious? The Black Widow would never actually want to be bound to someone in that way."
"And you know her?" Steve asked with a raised eyebrow. The years working with the formidable agent had given him more and more knowledge about her. She still held many things to herself but there were fundamental desires even her perfect mask could not cover at every moment. She might deny it at first when asked but only because she never thought to be worthy enough to earn them.
Bucky scoffed. "Better than you, I believe." He did not dare to tell him yet to what extent he actually knew her. The memories were still too vague to be certain about it.
Steve waited a few moments and stared out onto the lake, watching the swans moving over the water. "How is your current relationship with her?" he asked finally.
That made James freeze. "It's difficult… I am not sure if she - and I - are ready for anything. I try my best to be a good father and take care of Alexei at night when he wakes up."
"Where do you sleep and when?" He would have been blind not to see the dark circles around Bucky's eyes.
"The couch mostly. Stupid Stark didn't even think when he gave us our rooms."
"Well, you can be glad he even offered them." Steve replied scoldingly but he knew what troubles that was currently causing the parents. Tony could be such an idiot sometimes, especially when it came to relationships. Still, it was better than being on the run from HYDRA with a toddler. "So you two didn't do any… fondue-ing since then?" He didn't want to say the actual words, deciding to use a word which meaning Bucky understood.
The Soldier laughed and shook his head before his expression darkened again. "After all I put her through, I don't think she wants me anywhere near her in that regard. She does flirt with me though, but I think that's… just her style."
"It is. I've seen her flirt up close. But with you? Come on, buddy. I saw her once talking to you in Russian and the words she used were very ambiguous as far as I could tell with the little language skills I have. She understands you need your time to get used to a free life again, but don't make her wait forever." Like an afterthought he added. "And don't make her regret it."
James thought about that. Especially the last part. Never, he swore himself, would he harm her or their child again. But could the Winter Soldier actually become a prime example of a loving father and husband? No, that was impossible. Could Bucky Barnes? He would have loved to, with the right woman, at the right time. He could have been a… daddy. But the Bucky Barnes he once had been wasn't there anymore, not all of him. Too many things he had lost while being under HYDRA's influence.
Steve could see the struggle in him. "You can decide who you are. You are a free man now and whatever the future holds you can make the best of it. And quite frankly, the opportunities fate has given you this far are a good reason to keep on fighting hard for what you want, and for those you love. The road may get bumpy somewhere along the way, but you will reach your goal, and whenever you need my help, I'll be there for you."
"Till the end of the line, pal." Bucky said with a pained smile as he remembered those words. It hurt, but in a good way. They would make things right.
"Till the end of the line." Steve repeated with a nod before he hugged him tightly. "Jerk."
"Punk." Bucky said with a chuckle that was half a sob. Damn, when had he gotten this sentimental? "The line ends at the bedroom door, by the way. I can take it from there on." He added jokingly before both of them would actually start to cry.
Steve coughed. "Yeah, thanks for that information." He gave Bucky one last slap on the back before turning towards the lake again. "We should get back. Come on. Let's race."
"You think this is a good idea?" James asked with an arched eyebrow. If they took it too far his survival instincts might kick in and bring back the darker side of his soul.
"Yes." He answered with a grin before using the headstart a distracted Bucky was giving him. "Three." He bolted off.
"Hey! You kind of forgot one and two!" He shouted before running after him as fast as he could.
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They were fighting for the upper hand in the race, but since James was still holding back, Steve was a few feet in front of him. Something made the Captain almost miss a step before he turned his head with a shit-eating grin and said to Bucky: "Follow my lead."
James didn't know what to make of it. He could see another jogger with a worn out army pullover in front of them. Then he watched Steve making his move.
"On your left," he said loud enough for Bucky to hear as well as he passed the man.
"What the hell?" The jogger laughed and shook his head, trying to keep up with Rogers.
Now it seemed to be Bucky's turn. "On your left." He said in the same timbre Steve had as he had run past him.
"The fuck?!" He almost tripped and had to abandon his plans of trying to pick a race with Rogers. He didn't trust his own eyes as the two of them turned around and came back to him with big smiles on their faces. Sam leaned over and took a second to catch his breath before he blinked at them. "You've got to be kidding me."
Steve spoke first because Bucky seemed a little unsure of how to respond, but thus far there was no conflict in sight, yet. And he knew Sam by now. He would neither be stupid enough, nor cold enough to actually start a fight. "Nice seeing you here, Sam. Good to know you keep yourself in top form." There was a little bit of friendly mockery in his voice.
"I believe the two of you have already jogged from one end of the park to the other three times, right? Did you take your 'You should be ashamed of yourself.'-extra lap." He joked but eyed Barnes carefully once his brain had enough oxygen to function and comprehend.
"Wilson. I…" He didn't know how to say it but he knew he didn't want to start any talk without apologizing first.
"Yeah, no hard feelings, bro. But you still owe me new wings."
Bucky was amazed at how easy the man took it that the one who tried to murder him just appeared out of the blue. He saw Steve's grateful smile and realized that Wilson must have been somebody who had helped Rogers recover from what the Winter Soldier had done to them, and what had been done to Bucky Barnes.
"When you told me you finally found your friend, I kind of didn't expect to meet him again during a run in park, quite frankly."
"We have been keeping him in Stark's Tower while he recovered from his serious injuries when he…" Steve stopped. He didn't know how much information he should give in general. The whole issue of the 'Winter Widow' child as Tony sometimes called the baby was best to be kept a secret for now.
"When what?" Sam asked, entirely oblivious while he opened his water bottle for a quick sip.
He wasn't sure if he could trust this person yet but only the thought of how this man would react was worth the risk. "When the Black Widow made me a father."
Wilson choked on his water and coughed for a few seconds before he looked at him with confusion and shock written all over his face. "What? You mean...?" He tried to overplay his disbelief with a little joke. "Guess the spider has some bite to her if you got actually hurt. What did she do? Broke your hand and tried to snap your neck or rip off certain parts of your anatomy?"
A dark shadow ghosted over Bucky's face before he got control of himself again. The memory of what had happened in reality was still like sharp ice in his soul.
"No, Sam. It's a little bit more complicated than that. Let's just say, HYDRA was involved." The Captain tried to explain.
Wilson processed the information. "Well that makes sense considering Natasha didn't really look that pregnant when we fought in DC." He had helped Steve filter through the files he had about the Winter Soldier and knew how far those freaks could go. "Nat and the child are fine? Boy or girl?"
"Natalia and the boy are fine. His name's Alexei." The bad memories were driven away by the love he felt towards his family.
"It changes ya, doesn't it?" Sam said and meant it more as a truism to not show how dumbfounded he actually was after this revelation. Then he saw the emotions playing over Barnes' face and realized how deep that thought went for him. Wilson tried to correct his mistakes just as Bucky answered.
"Yes, it does." A smile spread across his lips and reached his eyes that glowed with longing and love.
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Wilson had joined them on their way home and once Sam had been able to leave Tony speechless for a few seconds after a remark about flying with the help of a suit, James had decided he liked the man with the wings.
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I hope you liked this chapter. Took a long time to write. Thank you, Grimth for aiding me. And I am sorry I didn't use the part where Bucky loses it and fights Steve and Sam, but I need that outburst moment for the trigger words in the next chapter. But I was glad for you to come up with the tracking device and the "on your left" moment. I would never have been able to come with that myself I think. You will surely not have expected the flashback sequence though. That just came to me while I wrote and suddenly the words were pouring out of me. I loved how it made the arc when she repeated his words from long ago.
Don't be confused by the flashback moments that will appear in the next chapters. I have reasons why they might be incoherent and not fitting together. Because hell, they are great together, and they would have developed feelings at some point, so they needed to forget to function properly. And there are some things they forgot, they will cry over when they remember, but that'll close to part 3. Long way to go for these two. Poor winterwidow.
Please review ^^