Hey all, ok I know some of you may be confused. Obviously originally there isn't a Tharbad prison but I needed somewhere to put her. So I'm making that there is some makeshift prison from the ruins of Tharbad that is the a place to put criminals that plague the northwest in a place south of the shire and on the western side of the misty mountains. I wanted to see how misunderstood she could be and see where it leads her. Enjoy! Disclaimer: I do not own the Hobbit.

Chapter 4: Going the Completely Wrong Way About It.

Well she was definitely in the wrong direction now.

She had been locked up in Tharbad prison for a month now and her stay was progressively getting worse. She was also getting pretty lonely in this cell.

There were a number of things that went wrong for her. The first was that she never made it into Bree and instead was send further southwards and at least a weeks walk away. The second was the state of the accommodations she was given. She really was seeing how a world that hadn't experienced the Geneva Convention worked. The prison was dim and dirty and oh so very smelly. Made more so by the particularly nasty bog nearby. The third was that her fellow inmates refused talk to her anymore and she had even had her one cellmates ask to transfer away from her even if it meant a worse (if possible!) cell for her. Jenny tried not letting it get to her but she was pretty hurt over that and didn't understand why no one liked her. All she did was talk about how she would clean up the place.

Just about the use of an insect bomb and some thorough scrubbing.

'All this place needs is a thorough gassing that's all,' she had told her old cellmate, 'that and some backbreaking work on the walls. It'll really make things liveable for us.'

Her cellmate cowered in the corner for the rest of her time with her. Any further attempts on talking to her were met with sobbing and she worried for the poor girl.

Now with her cellmate gone she spent most of the time in isolation except for the nervous looking guard that gave her food who Jenny took to flirting with out of simple boredom. The guard didn't really seem to appreciate it but it made her feel a little better.

It was just another dull day when a different guard arrived at her cell. This one apparently took black very seriously as it seemed he had draped in it in every way possible on himself.

'Prisioner 326? We finally… meet.'

Jenny pursed her lips.

'My name is Jenny.'

He completely ignored her comment.

'There has been… talk amongst the prisoners. Lets just say I've heard of your… expertise.'

Jenny just looked at him blankly through the bars.

'My what?'

'Now don't be shy. It's no secret now. You've made yourself the quite reputation. The dwarves also had no qualms discussing your… unique skill set. It seems you have quite the way with other inmates Prisoner 326,' the prison guard continued gleefully.

Jenny wracked her brains to remember what she had been saying to the dwarves she had been travelling with.

'It's Jenny and I think I remember telling the dwarves about what I do for a living? They took offense,' she said finally wondering if that is what he meant. It was true the guard could use a trim as his hair looked similar to a greasy birds nest. It was shameful he had left it go so long without due care as it was frizzing terribly at the ends and she mourned at his split ends.

'Yes… what you do for a living,' he said delighted.

'No need to be so dramatic about it. It's not really that big of a deal,' Jenny said to the odd guard, 'Did you want me to have a go at your… problem?'

Jenny cringed when she unconsciously mimicked his speech pattern. The guard was ecstatic though at her apparent willingness to collude with him. He leaned in closer.

'Ah, you're beginning to understand the situation. You see in reward for your… generosity we could do a little something about these bars hmm?'

Hold up! They were going to let her go?

'So in payment for my services you're letting me go?' she asked attempting to sort out the implications of giving the man a haircut. The guard gave a disturbing laugh.

'Oh, I can do one better. Depends how well you do this could be a more... permanent arrangement.'

'If I'm going to do it with any regularity I want to be paid,' she demanded. She needed money to travel to Bree anyway.

'Negotiating already? Hmm… well let's see how… creative you get. Then we'll discuss payment… deal?'

Jenny didn't really have to think it over too long. It was an offer too good to be true and she was sure the guard knew it too judging by the smirk.

'Deal.'

In what had to be the bottom level of the prison where the shackles hung menacingly on the walls there was a side room the guard led her to. She didn't see many inmates on the way down as most of them fled to the corners of their cells as they walked past.

People are so unfriendly here, she mused.

'Here it is. You're… workspace.'

Jenny took in dingy room and then focused on the centre of the room. There was a dirty chair and a rusty table with some equally rusted implements on it. There wasn't even a pair of scissors! And what was she supposed to do with that large screw? She cringed at the conditions she had to work in.

'Well this'll do I guess. I do like my equipment a little cleaner as they make a finer slice but I guess I could just heat them up with that fireplace to try an achieve the same effect,' she told the delighted guard.

'You'll fit right in here… Jenny.'

Jenny wrinkled her nose at him and decided to get things moving. She had noticed this guys' tendency to make things drag out. Plus, the sooner this was done the sooner she was out of here and one step closer to Bree.

'Well, why don't you sit right down and let me show you what I can do for you,' she said to the guard.

In response the guard just laughed.

'Oh, you're an amusing one. You're going to make this place a lot more… fun.'

'What do you mean? You're the customer correct?' Jenny said impatiently. She was quite fed up with this.

'Customer? Oh well if you're keen I'll bring in your… customer. He's simply been dying to see you.'

With that the guard left her in the dingy workspace she had been given. Apparently she was not in fact giving the guard a haircut but someone else. She sighed in frustration and started picking at the implements she had been given. She scrutinized one of the knives she had been given and noted the rusty-coloured blood on the tip.

Clicking her tongue in disgust she wiped the blade and then went over to the fire to burn off most of the gunk.

This place was so unsanitary and no wonder they took to asking prisoners for help if the last guy had you bleeding over a haircut. No, she supposed that was unfair. It might have just been a close shave that nicked the customer. She had accidentally done that once or twice while she was an apprentice. Those wounds tended to bleed a lot too and so maybe the blood on the chair could be explained from that as well. Still that was no excuse not to be hygienic.

The door to the room opened once more and a rough looking dwarf stumbled in followed by the creepy guard.

'Here is your… customer,' he said excitedly.

She could definitely see why she had been called in. The dwarf's hair was a nightmare. Tight braids have fuzzed up and tacked together with other strands of matted hair. His beard was even worse with singed patches -and was that a toffee lolly tangled at the bottom?

'Oh, what a mess,' she whispered under her breath and she pulled the knife from the flame.

What she didn't know was the dramatic effect she was causing between her half-shadowed face and the glowing heat of the knife. She actually looked quite menacing.

The dwarf gulped.

'This might take a while,' she warned the guard. He nodded understandingly.

'See what you can get out of him. He's been quite… tight-lipped.'

Jenny nodded accordingly but truthfully didn't understand.

'Well, I guess I can start with the tips and work my way up,' she mused out loud to the horror of the dwarf, 'As for his length… well… I'll try to save as much as I can.'

It was then Jenny noticed the wide-eyed look she was receiving from the dwarf and the quick darting of eyes towards the creepy guard. She reached a conclusion.

'Perhaps it might be best if we had some privacy?' she asked the guard trying to pacify the dwarf, 'I work best when there isn't an audience.'

The guard was dutifully understanding to her surprise.

'Of course. If they is anything you need I'm just a scream away.'

With that he left and the door closed almost ominously. The dwarf squeaked.

'Oh, come now he's gone now so we can let loose a little,' she soothed, 'Now lets see what we can do about that hair.'

The screaming from the small chamber echoed through the prison and the head torturer smiled at the closed door.

'What a promising apprentice,' he mused quite pleased.

She had never met such an ungrateful client

'It's just hair!' she grounded out frustrated.

'Just hair! You monster!' the dwarf cried out horrified.

'Well you shouldn't have let it get to this condition if you wanted to keep the length,' she gritted out with both hands in the tangle. She was actually thankful the guard strapped the dwarf in the chair now even when she had thought it overkill before.

'Good God! This is melted metal not toffee! What have you been doing!?' she cried out in despair over his beard, 'I'll have to chop it all off!'

'Demon! Witch! Beard-cutter!'

'Oh, enough name-calling you baby. Now, what were you even in prison for?' she asked trying to distract him from her putting the blade to his mangled locks.

'Only petty thievery! I don't deserve this treatment!' he cried out in tears.

'What do you even class petty thievery?' she asked half-interested half-intent on cutting out the unsalvageable pieces of hair.

'Let me go with the other man! I'll tell him everything if you just stop,' he sobbed.

'No way! He told me that I had to finish and God help me I will. I'm not letting you leave till this mess is gone and you look presentable.'

'I'll give up my accomplices! My trade route! My own mother! Just stop please…'

'Is it true that lady dwarves have beards as well?' she asked curious now but without pausing her actions in the slightest.

'What?' the dwarf asked dumbly.

'Well I've gotten curious about dwarf women you see,' she said soothingly, 'I've heard their bearded too. Does your mother have a beard?'

'I was joking about my mother!' the dwarf cried, 'Don't you touch her!'

'Calm down. It doesn't have to be your mother. I'm not fussy. Any dwarf lady would do,' she paused and mulled over where she could go to see one, 'You're from the "Blue Mountains" correct?'

The dwarf was aghast.

'You're a demon. Sent from the pits of hell as a blight to dwarfkind,' he whispered in apparent agony, 'Not even the womenkind are safe. Will you inflict yourself on our precious children as well!?'

'Well… I suppose if I have the opportunity,' she replied breezily, 'I dare say they'll accept it better than you have you overgrown child.'

The dwarf fell into an anguished silence after and quite frankly she was relieved. It made it easier to finish off his haircut. She took a step back and admired her work.

'There we go. Much better,' she said proudly at the dwarf's hunched and defeated back. He didn't say anything back.

She opened the door to her new workplace and saw the guard lingering outside.

So creepy, she mused.

'I've finished up with him now,' she informed him, 'He was actually quite chatty once I managed to open him up.'

The guard was delighted.

'Ohoho did you now! Excellent work. Now as promised I'll take you to the cottage set for our... special workers,' the guard said pleased, 'Let me just have a chat to our customer and I'll show you out. I'm oh so very… glad your here.'

Jenny nodded appeased. She wouldn't have to go back to her cell after all.

'I expect my payment in full,' she warned and went to step out side.

'Oh you... well deserve it,' was the silky response and the door swung closed behind him.

She waited for the guard outside the room and felt a little pleased. She was finally beginning to make some headway in this world.

After the horrors of what happened in the torture room the broken dwarf was led painfully back to his cell. His hair a couple of inches shorter and his beard close cut to his face. He was almost crippled with humiliation. His fellow inmates noted that there wasn't any blood on him as he walked past.

'In places we can't see?' they whispered.

'Can cripple without shedding blood?' others questioned.

'She broke me,' the dwarf cried to his cellmate, 'Never have I had such torture. I mean look at me!'

It was true. The dwarf certainly looked a wreck despite his evenly cut bangs.

'I even confessed but it didn't even faze her. She just kept cutting,' he admitted thoroughly shamed.

With wide eyes the newly enlightened eavesdroppers to the conversation went wild with rumours and soon it was around the whole prison.

The next day when Jenny was asked to come back she was met with distain and fear from the inmates.

Jealous perhaps, she mused. Either way she had a customer to get to and nothing was going to stop her from succeeding in getting paid.

xx