Author's Note: It's not the sequel that was asked for, but it is the prequel that I thought would be fun! Basically this is the conversation that led up to the first chapter's discussion. And the Shinji/Yutaka content is a little more overt.
"I just think it's super weird that they started dating," Yutaka said, ass on the top of the park picnic table and chin in his hand.
"What's so weird about it?" Shinji asked from his spot on the bench below him.
They were of course discussing the recent development of Kyoichi Motobuchi and Satomi Noda deciding to date. It had been the topic of choice for the majority of class 3-B for a week now. Shinji really didn't find it that interesting. Yutaka really couldn't wrap his head around it.
"Uh, pretty much everything?" Yutake answered, not at all helpful in supplying information, but more than helpful in making Shinji smile in amusement.
"They both get off on textbooks and neither of them are getting a ton of other offers; what more do you need?" Shinji asked, leaning his back against the picnic table until he was able to bend his head back and make eye contact with Yutaka.
"I don't know, something. Because, yeah, they're both smart and care about school, but what else? Noda does a bunch of stuff, but I've never seen Motobuchi do anything that didn't have to do with school. So why are they dating and not just studying together? What made Motobuchi decide to ask her out?" Yutaka asked. It was apparent to Shinji that he'd been over thinking it during the week while everyone was talking about it.
"I think you're overlooking one crucial detail," Shinji supplied, holding back a grin.
"What's that?" Yutaka asked.
"Noda has tits."
The quiet after the statement lasted all of three seconds before both boys were cackling.
"Damn, how long were you holding that opinion to your chest?" Yutaka asked, barely suppressing his laughter.
"For a while, but it's my breast opinion," Shinji replied, much in the same state.
"Would you say it's your titular opinion?" Yutaka asked between giggles.
Shinji almost lost it at that. "I'd say that's not the correct use of the word titular."
"But it has tit in it!"
They laughed together for a while, hands holding their stomachs and tears in their eyes. It was the kind of laughter that only ever happened when they were alone together. Things were always funnier when it was just the two of them. It was like the quality in the air was better. Like it was so easy for a stomach to pleasantly flop when they were together.
"Damn, now my stomach hurts," Yutaka complained, a giant grin still on his face.
"It's your own fault for using words you don't know the meaning of," Shinji said, smile still on his face.
Yutaka simply made a dismissive noise, symbolizing his lack of regret due his word choice.
"Okay," Shinji started, an idea coming to him, "who in class do you think should date?"
"Who in our class do I think should date?" Yutaka repeated, wanting to make sure he understood.
"Yep. Motobuchi and Noda don't make sense to you, so who does?" Shinji asked, tone of voice saying for him that he thought what was about to come out of Yutaka's mouth was going to be entertaining.
"Dang, I don't know…" Yutaka trailed off as he tried to think.
"Ah, too hard for you," Shinji taunted.
"No, give me a second! I can think of some," Yutaka said. "Kazuhiko and Ogawa are already together. And I think Kuramoto and Yahagi are going out…"
Shinji made an exaggerated yawning noise. "You're really striking out on this," Shinji teased.
"Alright, give me someone and I'll tell you who they should date," Yutaka demanded, his pride on the line.
"Hmm, okay, how about…" Shinji grinned. "Oda?"
"Ah, come on!" Yutaka complained.
"You come on; you said to give you a name," Shinji reminded him, giving him his signature wink.
"Fine, you know what? Game on," Yutaka said, his eyebrows coming together in concentration. "He should date… Kitano."
"Kitano? What did that poor girl ever do to you?" Shinji questioned, lying his head back to rest against Yutaka's knee.
"It could work! I mean, how can you be mean to a girl who gives you cake!" Yutaka argued as best he could. Even he knew his reasoning was terrible, but cut a guy some slack! Who in class would want to date Oda?
"Rock solid logic. I'd let you stab me if you gave me a slice of cake first," Shinji joked.
"Fine, you pair someone up. Souma, go," Yutaka demanded.
"Oh, easy. Kawada," Shinji said, barely sparing the pairing a thought.
"Why Kawada?" Yutaka asked leaning over to look at Shinji whose head was still balancing on his knee.
"Because she's crazy and he looks like he's got experience with crazy shit. So I say throw them in a room and see what happens," Shinji suggested.
"You would make the worst matchmaker," Yutaka concluded.
"You're right; I should give them cake before I throw them in the room," Shinji joked only to have Yutaka knock his head off of his knee. Unfortunately for Yutaka, that only made Shinji laugh.
"Fine, give me someone else," Yutaka said, laughing a little himself.
"Okay, since you did such a great job with Kitano, try hooking Kusaka up with someone," Shinji suggested.
"Okay, cool. That's easy, um," Yutaka took a few seconds to think before snapping his fingers. "Oh, Hatagami!"
"Hatagami?" Shinji asked.
"Yeah! He plays baseball, she plays softball. So they totally have that in common. And I bet their friends would get along," Yutaka said, feeling confident that his argument would reach Shinji's approval.
"Hmm, I guess, but she's pretty tall," Shinji said after thinking for a moment.
Yutaka scoffed. "So what?"
"I'm just saying it'd be weird dating someone that tall. He'd probably feel short next to her," Shinji said, not noticing the look on Yutaka's face.
"Yeah, wouldn't want to feel short. Nothing worse than that," Yutake replied, side eyeing Shinji in his offence.
"Oh, come on, that's not what I meant," Shinji said, turning to straddle the bench and patting Yutaka's knee. "You're taller than plenty of girls."
"And plenty of them are as tall as me. Should I not date anyone unless I get a pair of stilts?" Yutaka asked, not yet batting Shinji's hand off his knee. It was a good sign that Yutaka wasn't actually that offended. Not that he usually was. He tended to take things in stride.
"Nah, I actually think you should date someone taller. Way taller in fact," Shinji said before winking at Yutaka. "Maybe someone as tall as me even."
"You know by basketball standards you're short too," Yutaka pointed out.
Shinji grinned. On that front Yutaka wasn't wrong. Professionals tended to have quite a few centimeters on Shinji. Even guys on the school team tended to run taller than him. At least if they were any good. But relying on height would only get you so far.
"Yeah, luckily I make up for it by being way better than everyone else," Shinji said, hand not leaving Yutaka's knee. "Now, keep playing. Give me someone to match up."
Yutaka sighed dramatically, a sure sign that he wasn't even a little mad at Shinji. "Okay, let's see, how about—" Before Yutaka could finish his sentence he interrupted himself with laughter.
Shinji stared on, unsure what had just happened. "Are you going to share with the class?"
"No, yeah, I just realized we can't pair everyone up in class." Yutaka managed once he'd stopped laughing.
"Why's that?" Shinji asked, eager to know where Yutaka was going with his though.
"Who would Sho date?" Yutaka asked, a grin on his face.
Shinji rolled his eyes. He couldn't believe he'd forgotten about Sho. Just earlier in the week Sho had suggested that they 'have that date' that Sho had been asking about all year. Something about the classes new couple putting love in the air.
"Ugh, anyone who's not me is fine," Shinji said.
"Well it has to be a guy," Yutaka concluded.
"You have someone in mind?" Shinji asked. "I'd love to hear your theory about who in class is secretly gay."
"I mean, lots of people could be," Yutaka pointed out.
"Yeah, but who?" Shinji asked.
"Hell, why not everyone?" Yutaka suggested.
Shinji snorted. "You think everyone in class is gay?"
"I think it'd be interesting if they were," Yutaka said before hopping up off of his seat on the top of the picnic table, a look like he'd just had an idea of his face. "Like, what if aliens came and they had a giant ray gun that made everyone on earth gay!"
Yutaka was standing in front of Shinji, and he looked all over proud of himself. Shinji, on the other hand, had some problems with his theories.
"There is no such thing as aliens," Shinji said for what felt like the millionth time in their friendship.
"The universe is huge; there's no way we're the only intelligent form of life!" Yutaka argued, pacing around with restless energy.
"If there is life on other planets, they aren't what you're envisioning. There are no highly evolved and sophisticated beings out there preparing for war," Shinji said, although if there wertr he thought it'd be pretty cool if they could possibly throw their government out of power. Maybe replace it with something a little less fascist.
"You don't know that!" Yutaka said, pointing a finger in Shinji's face.
"Look, if everyone turned gay, it wouldn't be because of aliens," Shinji said as he attempted to get the conversation back on track. "It'd probably be a terrorist attack. My guess is they'd put something in the water."
"Ugh, that's so boring!" Yutaka moaned, sounding personally offended.
"Boring until the government was turning in on itself trying to arrest everyone while not arresting each other. Then I'd say it'd be pretty interesting," Shinji said, leaning back against the table, his eyes closed as he imagined the fall of the government.
"Not as interesting as aliens with ray guns," Yutaka muttered quietly only partially wanting to interrupt Shinji's government collapse fantasy.
"Fine, reasoning aside, say everyone is gay. Who do you think should end up together?" Shinji asked laying his fantasy aside to focus on Yutaka.
"Well, I mean, starting with Sho it has to be someone in the Kiriyama family," Yutaka said, easily forgoing the alien argument in favor of the 'who should date if everyone in class was gay' discussion.
"Question is, which one?" Shinji asked as he rubbed his chin. "Because I'm thinking Sasagawa."
"Really? I would have said Numai," Yutaka said plopping down next to Shinji.
"No way, he'd definitely be sucking Kiriyama's balls given the chance," Shinji commented only to have Yutaka snort in laughter.
"You've got me there," Yutaka agreed, looking around them as though he thought someone might hear them. "So if Kiriyama is with Numai and Sho is with Sasagawa, where does that leave Kuronaga?"
"Dating outside of his friend pool. Who do you think could stand the heat?" Shinji asked, curious to see what Yutaka would come up with.
"Why do you always give me the hard ones?" Yutaka muttered before finally sighing and saying, "Screw it, I feel like Oda is my default."
"Suddenly Motobuchi and Noda make a lot of sense, huh?" Shinji asked as though he'd proven the point he had wanted to make all along.
"No way! I can make better couples! How about…" Yutaka hesitated for a moment before snapping his fingers. "Hatagami and Yuichiro."
"Now I think Hatagami is your default. Have you guys been hanging out behind my back?" Shinji asked with a wink before putting his arm around Yutaka.
"I hate that you had to find out this way," Yutaka said with a straight face before dissolving into laughter along with Shinji. "But, no, those two have been friends since primary school. It'd totally make sense if they started dating."
"Hey, I'm not arguing," Shinji said, putting his hands up in the air. "I'm totally for two long term friends getting it on. I bet the sex would be great."
"And the pillow talk afterward would be just as good," Yutaka reminded him, knocking their shoulders together. "And that's what makes a lasting relationship."
"Here, here," Shinji agreed, although the closest thing Shinji had ever had to a lasting relationship was with the guy beside him. And they'd certainly never had sex. Gosh, what a thought.
"Okay, now you pick a couple," Yutaka demanded.
And like that their game went on.
Shinji paired up Mitsuko and Takako, Kuramoto and Niida, Yoshio and Keita, Yamamoto and Oki, Tendo and Eto, Izumi and Sakura, and Kayoka and Yuko.
Yutaka paired up Hirono and Yoshimi, Haruka and Yukie, Yumiko and Yukiko, Inada and Kaori, Yuka and Chisato, and Sugimura and Kawada.
As they went on Shinji realized things that he doubted that Yutaka did, such as the fact that while their class had an even number of people, they had an odd number of boys and girls. He also realized that at the end of things he and Yutaka would be left together.
It didn't bother him. How else could things go? They were best friends so it only made sense that if it had to be a dude, it'd be Yutaka.
So that was why it surprised him when he prompted Yutaka to pair up Shuya.
"Oh, that's easy, he'd totally be with you," Yutaka said flippantly, like he didn't even have to think about it.
Shinji's left eyebrow raised, seriously?
"You think Shuya would be with me?" Shinji questioned doubtfully.
"What? You didn't think I'd pair you up?" Yutaka asked tauntingly as though that was where he lost Shinji within the conversation.
"Not with Shuya," Shinji said as though he was waiting for Yutaka to realize his mistake.
"Huh? Why not with Shuya?" Yutaka asked, completely clueless as to why Shinji was giving him the look he was.
"Because of who that leaves," Shinji said slowly in that way you do when you think someone's really not thinking very hard.
For a second Yutaka's eyebrows came together in thought, then all of a sudden it looked like the reason finally dawned on him.
"You think he'd pick Yoshitoki over you?"
But of course it didn't.
And a part of Shinji wanted to say as much. But then that would be kind of weird. Like, No, dumbass, I think you'd pick me over anyone else. I don't really care about who Shuya chooses.
Yeah, that would be a little weird. But still, he could try to get Yutaka there because it wouldn't be so weird if Yutaka just changed his mind.
"Yeah, I mean, that is his best friend since childhood," Shinji said, extra emphasis on the words he felt were important.
"Yeah, but you're you. You guys would be a total power couple!" Yutaka argued.
"So what? Weren't you the one going on about needing that extra something?" Shinji asked, rolling his eyes even as he began smiling. He was him, huh?
"You guys would have plenty of that!" Yutaka argued, not noticing the switch in Shinji's mood.
"Okay, you're wrong." Shinji said with a shake of his head, a smile on his face.
"Nuh-uh! You're so crazy if you think that!" Yutaka said as he threw his arms in the air.
It was with the waving of Yutaka's arms that Shinji noticed Shuya, Yoshitoki, and Hiroki heading toward them.
"Shu, just the guy we needed to see," Shinji greeted, a smirk on his face that said he knew he was going to win this one.
Which was good, because like hell Yutaka was going to hypothetically end up with someone else. How stupid would that be?