Dark
Time was really flying now. It was almost time to leave Spinners End, and he couldn't be less pleased. But there were some bright sides. The thought of Narcissa blowing him would leave, at least temporarily. He hadn't been back in that bedroom since it happened. Before that, it had been years.
But he was sleeping now, in the same bed he had all his life. His bedroom was too small to upgrade to a queen, his full barely fit. He supposed he would have more room if he removed the desk, but it wouldn't feel right to move it anymore.
He had a hard time sleeping. In fact, the Hall of Prophecies had shook him to his core somehow. He had noticed, he hadn't been the same since. He had been more drunk, less stable. And more angry. The flashbacks were growing in frequency, they were almost daily now. And his dreams, while he hadn't slept well too begin with, were quickly turning into nightmares. To night terrors. He was, to say the least, alarmed.
He was walking down the street. He was probably eight or so, which was too young, but his parents didn't even notice when he wasn't in the house anymore. He often walked places. In town, he looked in shop windows, he walked past the coal mill with the chimney, his little hands on the gates, peering through the wires. He watched cars go by. He had, unknowingly, walked down Bloom Street often enough, past Lily's house. But his favorite place was the very park where they had met.
It was a school park, he learned later that it was where Lily and Petunia went to school. Sometimes he would walk by, and stare at the other children. They laughed, played games he would never understand. He didn't understand friendship, didn't understand that he longed to have a friend. He had walked by once, while the other children were playing. They had laughed, saw his greasy hair and the coat he wore. He then kept his wandering around the park until after three.
Then, just as suddenly, the scene changed. He was with Lily; they were both teenagers again. "Why did you do it Sev?" She asked him, an almost pleading look on her face. "Why do you care what blood I've got? I thought you loved me, all of me!"
"I do love you!" He answered back "I love you more than anything, I-"
And they were swarmed, surrounded by Death Eaters. Lily was screaming, he was yelling. They were apparated back to the Dark Lord, who said "You lied Severus."
He was getting tortured, she was getting tortured. It hurt more then the Cruciatus curse, her screams filled the air. Voldemort laughed, and said "Take out your wand." He did so, trembling. "Kill her." He said, with that smile on his face. "Never!" He shouted back.
"Why Sev? Why say no, you already did kill me! You killed me because you were stupid enough to not listen. You're a coward!"
Tobias, who had come out of nowhere, started laughing at him as Voldemort tortured him "You hear that boy? Even she thinks your a coward! You grew up your whole life watching me, saying you were better. Is raping children better? Is killing people better? You killed me too, you know."
He was crying now, sobbing as Lily's screams filled his ears again. "No no NO!"
"Kill her! Now!"
"No!"
Voldemort had his wand directly in front of his nose. He wasn't afraid, that was the only thing that kept him alive; Voldemort had already taken his life, why should he be afraid of dying? But Tobias pushed Voldemort out of the way, and he shrank back in fear, his voice high pitched and his glasses falling off his face; he was 6 again. "You think you're so damn special, thinking you could over power me. Yes, hypocrite Severus. You were a fool, kid! Fools always pay for their foolishness!"
"Hypocrite!" screamed Lily, far away now "You're a hypocrite and a coward. James was always better than you, he didn't use Dark Magic. Stupid filthy-"
He was aware he was screaming. He was just coming to, but his mouth was already working; "I'm not, please, I'm not, I'm sorry Lily, I'm so fucking sorry." He was crying, crying like some nancy but he couldn't stop. The night terror became a flashback in seconds.
"Look at you." Tobias had sneered. "Look at you crying there. Are you a baby Severus? Boo hoo hoo." He mocked, then laughed. "Are you going to keep crying like some sissy nancy boy? I didn't raise you to be a little girl, get the hell up."
He was adult Snape, screaming in agony, sobbing in earnest, like the little boy. It ended there, and he didn't know how long he cried. Slowly, the crying subsided, and the breathing grew even again. Something's seriously wrong. He thought to himself. I haven't cried like that since she died.
He got up slowly, ashamed of the puffy red face and his hair sticking to the side of his head. He eased himself out of bed and down the stairs, coming short in the kitchen. He glanced at the table and saw the very place the memory occurred.
"Get up!" Tobias screamed, kicking his teenage sons back as he curled up in a ball under the table. "Stand up and fight!" He screamed the last word, spit flew everywhere-
He shook himself slightly, and went to make breakfast. It's just a dream. He told himself. Just some stupid memory.
His brain was quiet as he scrambled some eggs. He was tempted to drink, but didn't think he could stand to wake up on the floor again. Indeed, the previous day he had started out with breakfast being a scotch, and woke up at two in the afternoon sprawled out on the staircase, his back and neck absolutely screaming in protest.
The bottle had still been in his hand.
He took his food to the living room, where a fire was once again blazing in the fireplace. He sat there in silence, eating thoughtfully and staring into the flames. Finally, he put his plate on the table beside the chair and got up, reached for one of his books, and sat back down. Abnormal Psychology.
Well, there isn't anything normal about this.
He flipped to the PTSD section again, staring at the words, trying to take them in, trying to find some reason this was happening. The alcohol made it worse, he didn't need a book to tell him that, but he couldn't stop anymore. He always reached for a drink, every time he was in the kitchen. He had to stop himself once or twice from doing it out of sheer habit.
But the words didn't make any sense either. Whether it was the headache from dehydration, the puffy eyes from crying, or his back, which still throbbed, he couldn't tell. But his eyes simply couldn't focus, his brain couldn't process.
Books had always been his release. They had never failed him. Anger swarmed through him.
"God fucking damnit." He muttered to himself. But he collected himself quickly, as he rose from his chair, he walked back to the kitchen and put his plate in the sink. With a swift motion from his wand, the dish was cleaning itself. He just watched, almost mesmerized by the water, before he walked back towards the sink and dipped his hands in the cool water. He splashed his face, and walked away. The faucet was still running.
He felt better now. There was a noise in this house, something besides the silence. And then, there was a tapping on the window. He was surprised, given earlier, that he didn't jump at the noise, but went over, paid the owl, and glanced down at the newspaper.
SCRIMGEOUR SUCCEEDS FUDGE
Rufus Scrimgeour, previously Head of the Auror Office in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, has succeeded Cornelius Fudge as Minister for Magic. The appointment has largely been greeted with enthusiasm by the wizarding community, though rumours of a rift between the new Minister and Albus Dumbledore, newly reinstated Chief Warlock of the Wizengamot, surfaced within hours of Scrimgeour taking office.
Scrimgeour's representatives admitted that he had met with Dumbledore at once upon taking possession of the top job, but refused to comment on the topics under discussion. Albus Dumbledore is known to (cont. page 3, column 2)
He was interested, although not surprised in the least. Of course he had been sacked, he just spent a whole year lying about the Dark Lords return. He couldn't even count how many times he had seen Voldemort in those 365 days.
"What's in the department of Mysteries?"
He had barely finished this thought when the Dark Mark burned. He was used to this by now, but he let out a hiss anyway. He ran up the stairs and peered in the mirror, grateful to see his face had returned back to its usual pace white. Next, he closed his eyes, and emptied his mind of everything good. Lily, Dumbledore, even memories that would make Potter vulnerable, which, of course, was the goal.
He Apparated straight to the gates of Malfoy Manor. He passed through easily, his infuriating tattoo soothed immediately as he did. He felt nothing in moments like these. He focused on what was around him. The wind on his face, the smells. But mostly, his feet. Staying grounded was his secret, and it was almost funny to think his feet had saved his life more times then he could count now. But now wasn't the time for fun.
The doors swung open of their own accord, he let his jealousy of the luxury of the place burn through for a moment. Yes, he would like that. He wanted to please his master.
He entered the drawing room. There was the table before the fireplace, but most of the seats were empty. The room was cold and dark, surmising fear in his followers. But he wasn't afraid. The one seat that was not empty was the furthest from the fire and closest to the door. "My Lord."
He appeared to be in deep thought up until Snape spoke. He looked up slowly, a small white lipped smile appearing "Severus. Sit down."
"Yes my Lord." He answered calmly. He did so, waiting for his master to speak.
"I assume removing Wormtail from your home went well."
"Yes my Lord. He seemed to have an interest in more dangerous tasks, as I assumed , anyway. He kept trying to fix the doors to my home, you see. Particularly when guests were there, I always seemed to find him behind one."
He hissed angrily. But he paused for a moment, thinking. Slowly, a smile (or what he assumed was one) flirted on his face. "I think I know the perfect assignment. Now, onto business. I assume you read the paper today Severus."
"Yes, my Lord."
"Then you know that Scrimgeour and Dumbledore have already spoken?"
"Yes."
"I want you to find out what they spoke about. I also want to know what new security they have placed around the school to keep me away from Harry Potter."
Severus's mask smiled "Consider it done my Lord."
"Good."
And suddenly, without warning, his memories were being attacked. He was a child being beaten for sneaking in a sick kitten. He was 12, and Potter had his wand on him, laughing at his full body bind. Narcissa Malfoy was blowing him, her grey eyes looking into his.
"What was that Severus?"
"Narcissa decided to show up unexpectedly at my place of residence a few nights ago." He answered pleasantly. "She required certain services that only I could provide."
"And did she receive these services?"
He snorted, this time completely genuine "Definitely."
Voldemort's laugh was like an icy wind. He hadn't seen any point in withholding this information, knowing that it would probably benefit him at some point. "Is she aware of this service being performed?"
"I'm afraid not."
His eyes gleamed dangerously. "Give me the memory."
He pulled out his wand slowly, knowing Voldemort hated the sudden movements of someone drawing their wand. Putting the tip to his temple, he concentrated on the act for the first time in days, pulling the silver blue away from him. He waved his wand, the memory was in the air, floating downwards as a flask appeared. He caught the memory, placed it in the flask, and corked it, putting it in Voldemort's outstretched hand as he did so.
"I will need time to review this."
"Certainly My Lord. Is there anything else I can do to serve you?"
"No. You've done well Severus. You may go."
He got up immediately, avoiding his eyes as he left. Down the magnificent staircase, out the path, and back through the gate that only marked Death Eaters could approach. He apparated almost immediately after and appeared in the grounds of Hogwarts, by Hagrid's cabin.
He started the walk to the castle deep in thought. The Dark Lord would no doubt be nothing of help to Draco. He couldn't see him doing anything to ensure that he would not fail, because Draco failing was the plan. However, it did raise the question then about why he wanted to know about the new protection around the school, if not to help him. He knew Voldemort wouldn't dare come near the school, not with Dumbledore as Headmaster anyway. So why?
He was startled to find himself already pushing open the doors to the castle, giving way to the now extremely familiar hallway. It almost felt good to be back. There were no horrors here, no memories of his father or getting beaten. But was it really better? The Marauders were always there, always tormenting. And the Slytherins rarely saved him, instead laughing along with them. It was part of the reason he had wanted to take the Mark so badly; it was a chance to prove himself.
"Peppermint sticks." He said to the gargoyle. The creature jumped aside, and Severus went up the stairs. He knocked softly, and was relieved to hear a strong "Enter" in return.
He pushed the door open. Dumbledore was at the Pensieve, slowly emptying memories into flasks. "I was summoned." Severus said.
Dumbledore entered one more memory, then turned to face him. "I assume something of interest was said?"
"Well, yes. He wants to know what you and Scrimgeour fought about. And the new security measures around the school."
"Naturally." Dumbledore murmured.
"What were you fighting about?" Severus asked bluntly.
Dumbledore sighed as he sat back into his chair. Snape followed suit, and gazed at the old man's lined face. It really hit him then just how old Dumbledore really was. His white hair, the beard, the wrinkles in his face. He seemed to age more slowly than most men.
"Because, once again, the Ministry makes demands of me I cannot morally meet."
This answer perplexed him, but before he could inquire further, Dumbledore said "The security around the school has been increased more than he could possibly know. Most are charms, but there are curses and jinxes to block spells. We are, as always, protected. I should intrust you to tell Lord Voldemort the less complex ones, keeping the more strong ones secret."
"Of course, is there anything I can do?"
"Well, that brings me to my next point of business. Last night, I hired not a new teacher, but an old one. I daresay you remember Professor Slughorn?"
He nodded, not daring to believe it yet. "Yes, he was the Potions Master before I was, I believe."
"Quite. And he shall reclaim the Potions Master title."
"Leaving me…?"
"Well, I think that a Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher would be in such a position to best protect students, do you not? And since you gave me your word, I have decided to make you the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher, should you choose to accept the position."
He couldn't speak. After all this time, Dumbledore decided that he finally wanted him to do it. Through his shock, he managed to gasp "I'll do it."
"Good. You should be able to move your things to Umbridge's old office immediately, if you come back to Hogwarts a little earlier than normal. Slughorn is already here and has demanded the space for the piano, you see." Dumbledore said pleasantly.
"Certainly. Does the new office have enough room to continue my work as the… a potioneer?"
"No. Your new quarters will have a room directly inside it that should suffice for your work. If you need something bigger, feel free to let me know."
"Certainly."
"Is there anything else?"
"No Headmaster."
"Then you're free to go pack." Dumbledore smiled at him
He rose slowly, the news still sinking in. He was almost at the door when he turned and said "Albus?" He saw Dumbledore raise his head once more to look at him. "Thank you."
He was still smiling when he said "Your very welcome. Thank you, Severus, for your help." He looked back down, and pulled a piece of parchment and a quill to him, and began to write. Once again, Severus slowly turned back around and exited, still hardly daring to believe it.
Looking back, I see writing and grammar mistakes all over the place. Most of these were written at work when I was bored. I'll go back and fix them now. Anyway. Another chapter. Hope ya'll enjoy