Dreams- NSFW

Severus moved his things from his quarters immediately. It didn't take long; with one flourish of his wand, he transformed a book into a box. Another, and everything was shrunken down. A couple more, everything he owned was in there, and the whole thing was almost completely weightless.

His new room was spacious. There was even a small kitchen and a second bedroom. Down the hall past all this, was what he would turn into his brewing room. It even had a cupboard for all his ingredients. He couldn't help but be impressed with Dumbledore; his new quarters seemed almost made for his needs.

Unpacking was more of a process then repacking was. He put two of his bookshelves on either side of the fireplace, three in his bedroom, and the last one in the potions room. The books were still smashed inside of them of course, some had always lain sideways on the others. But it was still homey. His armchair was still seated right in front of the fire. There wasn't a second, and why should there be?

Once the books were in alphabetical order, backwards, from the second letter of the last name of the author (he chuckled at his own cleverness with this, he liked to keep people guessing) he inspected the potions room more closely. The room would be laid out exactly how it was at home; three tables, three walls, an empty niffler cage, the bookshelf, and a closet. However, here, he could modify things slightly. "Autmeta pendeo" He muttered.

The bookshelf now was suspended slightly, and swung open, revealing the wall behind it. Severus smiled slightly, and got to work.

By the time he arrived back in Spinner's End again, he knew that he wouldn't be back. He wasn't really sure how he knew this. So, he packed the things he thought he would miss. His favorite books went first, then the wine cabinet and its contents. His cauldrons, tables, ingredients, and nifflers (which went into a seperate box). There was only one thing upstairs he would miss, and that was his picture of Lily from when they were 12. He couldn't be sure, the date was long gone with time. This was placed specifically in his pocket, even though he rarely looked at it anymore. He went out to the back garden, took a deep breath and disapperated without a backwards glance.

The sun was setting over the lake when he got back, making the water gleam on the surface. The sky was a pretty pink orange, and for the millionth time, Severus appreciated the beauty of the castle. He checked the time, then made a quick detour to the lake. It wasn't too far, and when he got there he stood at the water's edge watching the water roll to his feet, the orange ball of brilliant light sinking beneath the sky. He pulled out the picture of Lily and in the sunlight it looked like her hair was on fire. She smiled and waved at him, and just as the final curve of the sun sank, he waved back.

He didn't dawdle. Sticking the picture gently back into his pocket, he made his way the the greenhouses. He slipped into one of them and the plants moved weirdly in greeting. He stopped in front of the Blistering Fungula, and pulled out a flask, waiting. At exactly 7:30, he muttered "Accio" and several of the seeds flew into it.

He did this with several plants, then turned around and stopped short in front of the Mandrakes. The first time he had worked with these had been in his sixth year. All of the classes worked with them when the Chamber was reopened, but he remembered looking at them

and he heard that bright laugh. He turned slightly and watched Lily stand next to Mary McDonald, her eyes shining. He caught her eye and smiled slightly, but it was like she didn't even see him; she turned back to Mary to reply to whatever she had said, so he looked back at the Mandrake in front of him. In one swift movement he could kill himself, and everyone here if he wanted to. He wouldn't mind death. A one way stop to the pain he felt everyday. But kill Lily?

He would never kill Lily.

He sighed, turned his back on them, then walked back out of the greenhouse, a little shaken. He stopped short, however, when he saw Slughorn reaching for the Venus Fly Traps, his bare hand outstretched. "I didn't know you had a death wish." Severus said pleasantly.

The old man almost fell over. "Snape?" He asked, confused.

"Actually, they call me Professor Snape now. And the saliva in their mouths isn't ripe until dawn, not dusk."

Slughorn's eyes went wide, but he continued "They also have deadly sharp teeth that could swallow an entire bird whole, so I'd suggest distracting it and catching the drool." He stepped forward in front of it, and pulled out his wand. He levitated a stick in front of it and the fly trap raised its teeth slightly. Severus quietly pulled out a flask, and moved the stick around to its side, so the plant was looking sideways at Slughorn, it's massive head bared. Smirking, he silently collected the saliva dripping from the corner of its mouth. Then, he levitated the stick by Slughorn's face. The Venus Flytrap snapped forward and snached it, only inches away from the older mans nose.

Slughorn screamed and fell backwards. Severus stood over him and handed him the flask of green liquid. He took it, shaking. "At least you still have a hand." Severus reminded him.

Slughorn got up, still shaking. His booming voice was still strong however when he said "You know, Professor, teachers are supposed to stand united-"

"Which is why I didn't let it eat your arm, yes-"

"But as the reinstated head of Slytherin, I should say-"

"The Head of Slytherin? You?" Severus laughed here, his cruel cold one, the one he knew sounded like ice. "I think you're mistaken. I am the Head of Slytherin."

His face paled. "Now look here, Snape-"

"Professor Snape. And I'm sure if you have any questions about my Headsmenship, Dumbledore would be happy to answer them."

He was silent a long moment before saying "You've changed, Snape. And maybe not for the better."

"It's a good thing you're such a great judge of character then." Severus bit out

Slughorn turned then and walked back towards the castle. "Accio" Severus said again, and Slughorn yelped when the vial flew out of his hand and back into Severus'. He ducked back into a random greenhouse, cast a silencing charm, and laughed. His true laugh, which didn't sound nearly as cold. He wasn't sure how long he was in there, but he undid the charm, still chuckling, and started to make his way up to the castle.

Making his way up the path, he saw none other than Dumbledore himself. "Headmaster." Severus said in greeting.

"Severus." Dumbledore said back "Professor Slughorn caught me at the door."

"Did he happen to be hunched over? Swearing slightly? Perhaps some dirt on his bottom?"

"I see you two have reacquainted." Dumbledore said, his eyes dancing. "However Severus, I should ask you not to make Hoarse, shall we say unruffled, in the future. We do need him, you see."

"Certainly, however I should interject that a Potions Master without an arm is probably worse than an unruffled one."

Dumbledore said lowly. "Still. He's needed for more than teaching." Dumbledore looked around, but said no more.

"Alright. Do you want me to see what he's doing as well?"

He thought for a moment. "Couldn't hurt, but I wouldn't try and get any information out of him. That will be a task for someone else."

Severus had an inkling of who that might be. "He shouldn't have a hard time, The Chosen One does have a certain dinner party ring to it."

Dumbledore laughed this time. "Perhaps. But it won't be easy, even for him."

"Don't tell me you want me to look out for Potter too. I'm only one man Dumbledore."

"No, no, that's taken care of."

"Of course it is. But if you don't mind Headmaster, I'm going to go settle in."

"Of course." Dumbledore agreed, but he was still smiling.

"Goodnight Albus."

"Goodnight Severus."

As Severus continued up the path, a thought came to him. He turned around and said, rather loudy "Maybe more than just our new Potioneer should be more careful about his hands, Dumbledore." He saw Dumbledore hesitate a moment, but he kept walking in the direction of Hagrid's hut. Severus rolled his eyes and opened the doors to the Great Hallway. He was lost in thought the entire way to his rooms.

It was a couple days past now, and everything he owned was unpacked. Lily's picture sat on the end table next to his bed, his books were scattered around the living area and his bedroom. Some had made themselves home on his floor. He knew if he didn't move them soon, mice would get to them. But that didn't matter to him at the moment. The one week he dreaded above all else every year was finally back again; term would be starting Wednesday, in one weeks time. The week before term resumed was always the one he barely remembered. Most of the other teachers thought he just barricaded himself in his rooms and brewed potions, something that all the older teachers had caught him doing when he had locked himself away as a student. But this was hardly the case. This one week before term resumed is what had sealed his fate of becoming an alcoholic. During this period, all bets were off and incidentally, this one week is where he woke up in different places the most. The summer Black had escaped, he recalled, he had come to himself in the prefects bathroom when he jumped into the pool, swearing and choking on the bubbles when he hit the water; he had filled the thing with ice cold water instead of warm. After inhaling a lot of suds, he laughed himself stupid, as drunk people usually do, and fell asleep in the shower. It had put out his back for a month, but even three years later, sometimes he'd still laugh out loud at the memory. There were a lot of drunken escapades during this week.

So, unsurprisingly, he sat in his recliner, book in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other. His eyes were unfocused on the page in front of him. He didn't allow himself much time to grieve Lily. He preferred to think that, as it was his fault she had died in the first place, he didn't deserve to feel sorry. It was his fault, plain and simple, and there was no skirting around the fact.

His head was down as he walked, eyes buried in Shakespeare. Walking whilst reading and not tripping over anything was one of the few things he had mastered. But when he turned the corner leading into the Transfiguration department, his shoulder bumped into something solid. He saw a flash of red as he stumbled, but he maintained his footing. The same couldn't be said for the sixth year prefect on the ground. The green eyes that stared at him were as cold as ice. He held out his hand anyway "I'm sorry, I didn't see-"

"It's fine." Lily said shortly. She pushed herself up off the ground and stared at him for a long moment, then walked past him.

"I am sorry!" he called to her retreating form. He hadn't dared to set eyes on her in weeks, every time he saw her red hair he felt sick. But he didn't care who was listening at that moment. She turned back to look at him slowly, and with a thrill of horror, he saw that her skin was peeling off in flakes that covered her hair. Her eyes seemed to pop out of their sockets a little, and her voice was like sandpaper when she answered him hoarsely "Prove it." she hissed at him.

"How?" He was the adult Snape now, staring at the dead teenage girl "How can I make you forgive me? You must know that I had no idea-"

"That murder was part of being a Death Eater? Liar. You killed-"

Severus jerked awake suddenly. His bottle had crashed and broken on the floor. "Damnit." he hissed. He stood up, and immediately grabbed the back of his chair for support. His head was spinning and throbbing, and his mouth was as dry as

sandpaper.

"I'm sorry Lily." He said out loud. The words were met with silence: even the crackles from the fireplace were gone now. He was standing alone in the dark. He groped around in his pocket, but his wand was gone. "Fuck." he rasped. He started

groping her. She smiled at him, but it was almost a leer. "You want it, don't you baby?" she cooed. He did. He did want it. He had always found her attractive enough and now here she was, in nothing but a bra and knickers. He inhaled. It smelled like damp earth and honey. She brushed her long hair aside as he moved his hands down to her hips and hissed "You know I do." Her smile widened. It was as beautiful as a song, as dangerous as death. She was jerking him off as she straddled him, her pale skin shone bright in the moonlight. For one wild moment, he thought of an angel. But she was not innocent.

Not by a long shot.

He moved the cloth off to one side and forced her down. Her eyes rolled backwards as he filled her sleeve, and she groaned as he started to fuck her. She didn't need any encouraging, and she rode him in perfect rhythm. Abandoning fucking her, one hand moved to the back of her hair and yanked it down, the other roughly grabbed her throat. The harder he yanked and choked her, the more loud she got. She was slamming down on his cock now, and her eyes seemed to pop slightly with every stroke. She pulled his hand off her throat and sucked his index finger as she continued to bounce. He closed his eyes, and her tongue went lower, until her teeth lightly grazed his Dark Mark. His eyes flew open. She smiled mischievously at him. It was wicked, filthy. But suddenly, she stopped and his cock slipped out. He made to go back in, but she slapped his hand away.

"Now Snape, didn't anyone ever teach you how to please a woman?" she crackled. She sat up, affording him a decent view of her long legs, and he got to watch her take her panties off, fingers to toes. She looked at him, biting her lip as she slid back upwards. Gods, she was hot. She walked back in front of him and put one leg on the log that was behind them, and sat on his face. He didn't need to be told twice; his tongue circled her clit and lapped at her entrance. She forced herself downwards, and he thrust his tongue in her entrance. He received a yelp for this. Encouraged, he wrapped his arm around her and spanked her. Hard. She trembled this time, a soft moan escaping. He felt her squeeze his tongue and he withdrew it. Outraged, she grabbed him by his hair and shoved his face back into her labia, but he didn't budge. "Let me fuck you." he teased.

She let go of his hair and his head hit the tree again. He pushed her off and said "Face down. You like that, don't you?"

"Oooh Snape, has anyone told you it's sexy when you give orders?" she switched places with him and bent over the fallen tree he had just vacated. She whipped her hair around just in time to see him slam his cock into her from behind. Her scream made birds fly off their trees.

Severus couldn't see look down anymore, he was so close. He fucked her long and hard, but he couldn't help but look down at her ass bouncing on his cock as he fucked her. She moaned "Severus, fill me up." She was meeting his thrusts with thrusts of her own. The world started spinning "You'd love that, wouldn't you?" He grabbed her hips and held them in place as he withdrew and came on her creamy white ass. "Slut." He hissed down at her; even at nineteen, his sneer was infamous. But she was older, and her disdain was legendary.

"You stupid prick!" She turned around and clocked him, completely naked. His shock didn't last long. He grabbed her by the throat and held her. She rasped out, but couldn't make words. "Thanks for your services." he smirked. He threw her to the ground then, and the leaves crackled as her body hit the earth. "How's that feel, being so dirty that my come glues actual dirt to your ass?" He laughed at her then, and she hooded eyes were fire. Quicker than he would've thought possible, she leapt for her wand. Pure instinct took over, and in a mere flash, both of their wands were pointed at each other's throats. "You think you can best me?" Bellatrix laughed. Severus just stared at her. His love was solely for Lily, but if he had a type, it would be her. Secretly, he suspected the same for her. He watched her chest heave, her breasts bouncing slightly. He felt another throb and he realized he wasn't soft yet. "Levicoupus" he thought silently.

Her body flew up above him. She tried to jinx him as she was suspended in the air, but it hit a nearby tree instead. "But you like being called a slut, don't you?" He thrust his cock in her face and gauged her reaction. Her face softened immediately, and was even more shocked at the little "no…" That escaped from her lips. He was on the brink of letting her down in shock when she looked up at him and said "But I like being dirty. And your cock is the biggest I've ever-"

She stopped and Severus knew why. She was due to be married in three days time. He smirked to himself before replying "Well, the clock is ticking. Better get a move on then." He pulsed in her hand, which was once again jacking him off, her pussy still coated in fluids. He throbbed again and she took him in her mouth. He groaned and pulled her to him, once again teasing her clit. She moaned, and its hum spread up his length, vibrating around him. It felt good, but it was going to take some work on her part to get him off again. He pulled away and told her so. "Well, then let me down. I'll give you what you're asking for. But you might get ...more than you bargained for." she teased.

He obliged her out of sheer curiosity for what she had in mind. Instead of crashing to the ground, she caught herself as she fell and gracefully got to her feet. He was already moderately impressed when she walked up to him and whispered in his ear "Get out your wand." He did so, and

He heard himself groan and opened his eyes. It was morning now, there was a hint of the darkest blue peaking in from the window. He had a raging hard on as he remembered how the memory ended. "Fuck…" he hissed outloud, but as he made to grope his cock, there was a knock on the door. He stayed as silent as possible, but it was a watery voice that said "Come now, Severus, I need to speak with you. I know you're awake." he added. He didn't know if he was satisfied or not at how uncomfortable Slughorn sounded. Go figure he thought to himself. The one person that doesn't know about my week of-

"You've had enough Tobias-"

"Killed me." Lily whispered in his ear.

He shook his head like a wet dog. To his immense relief, Slughorn had stalked off.

He sat up slowly, amazed that he only had a slight hangover. He walked over to the faucet in the kitchen and cupped some water in his hands, drinking it, letting its coldness penetrate the rest of his face, letting it roll down his chin.

No. a strong voice in his head rang This isn't supposed to be happening here.

It's just a dream another voice argued Just a memory.

He snorted out loud. What a memory indeed.